An Honourable Man

"Seems like you were right," Nyx stated when they met, once again, in the garden by the river. "And also honest."

"You need to be a bit more specific, if you want me to know what you're talking about," House told her as he threw some pebbles into the flowing water.

"You were right when you said that Cuddy needed pushing so that she would start to push back again," Nyx clarified. "And you were honest when you said that you were going to be cruel."

"She didn't seem mortally wounded," House defended himself.

"True," Nyx agreed. "But she didn't look too happy either."

"She was feeling guilty," House snorted. "You don't feel too happy when guilt is riding you."

"Given that she gave in to pretty much everything you wanted," Nyx recalled. "You didn't seem too happy either. In fact, you looked greatly disappointed every time she caved."

"She is the dean of medicine and the head of the hospital," House contended. "She can't keep her position if she lets anyone walk all over her. If I can't have my girlfriend, then I need my boss back."

"So you pushed and pushed until she pushed back," Nyx decided. "And you were not kind about it. But even so, even with the hurt you dealt, I think she is better off now. In a way you gave her closure. I just hope you got closure as well."

"I may need a little more time before that happens," House sighed.

"I'm not sure I approve of your marriage, by the way," Nyx observed. "But I do approve you not taking advantage of her."

"I don't sleep with married women," House repeated his earlier words.

"Stacy was married," Nyx reminded him. "As was Lydia."

"And how did those encounters work out for me?" House asked. "The married women tend to return to their husbands."

"But this time you are the husband," Nyx pointed out.

"Maybe that is the point," House suggested. "She likes me. If we get more intimate, other feelings may follow. It's human nature. Stockholm syndrome, you know."

"You are not her captor," Nyx objected. "She is free to go."

"Is she?" House asked. "We need to stay married and live together for her to get her Green Card. Sure, we have a clearly defined deal, but there is no getting away from the fact that she is a sort of captive for a set period of time. When we agreed on it, I saw it as a sort of employer-employee deal, but it really isn't. She isn't a whore; I can't just pay her and forget about her; she can't just walk out and 'change profession'. She is going to be around for a while and I have an obligation to see to it that she can walk away unharmed."

"So 'he is an honourable man'," Nyx mused.

"So was Brutus," House replied.

"You didn't assassinate Cuddy," Nyx stated.

"No?" House raised a sceptical eyebrow at her. "I sure stabbed her in the back."

"From what I saw you confronted her head on," Nyx objected. "She was the one who avoided you."

"Not really," House said. "She just didn't seek me out. The problem was that she wasn't confronting me about anything. Not really. She just gave in to my every demand. Even before I actually demanded it. That's not good for either one of us. But I was talking about my marriage."

"That wasn't a stab in the back," Nyx observed ruefully. "That went straight to the heart."

"And how is that better?" House asked.

"You killed all hope," Nyx shrugged. "And now she has to move on."

"She was the one who broke up with me," House insisted. "Why would she have any hope?"

"Maybe she believed that you would make it your mission to show her that you can change into what she wants," Nyx suggested.

"I already tried that when we were together," House pointed out. "If I wasn't good enough at it then, why would I do better now?"

"No reason," Nyx agreed. "But that doesn't mean she didn't think would. Mind you, I'm fairly sure that wasn't it, but if it was, then you most definitely needed to kill all hope, because she can't jerk you around like that. Nobody deserves that kind of treatment."

"I don't know what she wanted or thought I'd do," House shook his head. "But I can't play that kind of games. I have to go by what I hear."

"Yes, it isn't easy to see what really is going on when you're too close," Nyx concluded. "It is so much easier to be objective and observant when you are just an outsider."

"Which is probably why I didn't recognize a serial killer when I saw one," House pondered. "He got to me with his 'daddy-issues' and I didn't go with my first gut instinct of him being a wanted criminal."

"Apart from telling you that he wasn't a criminal," Nyx contemplated. "He was probably telling you the truth. The regular patterns of his scars and burn marks sure suggest torture and prolonged abuse. And serial killers often were abused as children. That is how monsters are born."

"I may have my issues, but I didn't turn into a serial killer," House commented.

"Your Dad was rigid and clueless," Nyx claimed. "He didn't know what to do with a son like you so he fell back on his military training. Yes, he forgot that he was dealing with a child and he was often unjust and usually over the top, but there was no malice. And it isn't all that there was between you for as long as you can remember. Besides, the genetic condition and his drug abuse probably had a lot to do with your patient's actions, too."

"It's a possibility," House accepted. "But it is also possible that he was just evil."

"Masters will have a hard time with this one," Nyx worried. "You were fooled some, but she really believed in him."

"Yeah, she did," House sighed. "But the guy had nearly died. Everything changes for a few months when you have a near death experience. He wasn't his normal self now, so it really is not that surprising that Master bought the story. But she does need to be less trusting if she wants to treat patients."

"And if she can't be less trusting?" Nyx asked.

"She needs to go into research," House claimed. "She won't stay sane if she doesn't learn coping mechanisms with real, live patients. They do come in all shapes and forms and with all kinds of histories."

"But very few of them will be serial killers," Nyx insisted.

"But many will be murderers or paedophiles or just regular nutcases who get violent when the voices in their heads tell them to," House sighed. "She shouldn't blame herself for caring about Hannibal Lecter Junior; he was convincing and probably even meant it when he said that he believed he had been given a second chance to do better. Just because now his god told him that it was ok to eat meat, and we know what kind of meat he prefers, doesn't negate the fact that given how little we knew about him, but with the visual evidence we had, what he told us had a ring of conviction about it."

"I seriously doubt she'll take that view," Nyx stated.

"I know," House agreed. "But she should. If the rest of the team didn't suspect anything too dire either, why should she have? Even I was fooled up to a point. And even had we known who and what he was, we still had an obligation to do our best for him once we took him on as a patient. Yes, I do wish I had called the cops, and Chase, of course, might have decided to give him the wrong medicine, but other than that, we didn't do anything differently from what we would have done even had we known."

"You'll have a hard time trying to convince her of that," Nyx told him.

"I'm not going to even try," House stated. "If she can't figure this out for herself she needs to quit medicine or go to research."

"Or find yet another doctorate to do," Nyx proposed.

"She does tend to collect them," House accepted. "But it's up to her. I can try to guide her but she is the only one who really knows what she can live with."

"Isn't that true of us all," Nyx sighed.