Hey, so here's an update for you guys! I sure hope you like it! Lots of angst and Brittana love too :)! Hope you enjoy and please comment and review! I appreciate it a lot! helps me in being encouraged to continue writing this story!

She got there in five minutes flat. It was impressive for her because she is the mother of slow driving and she got there in five minutes. It was probably due to the adrenaline rushing through her veins after her girlfriend's phone call. Everything after the call was a blur of goodbyes and explanations with her mother. She didn't have time. Santana needs her. For what reason, she doesn't have a clue but by the sound of Santana's sobs over the phone, it was something serious and Brittany—ever the optimist—hoped that it wasn't.

But Santana never allows herself to cry. It was very rare for the the feisty brunette to break out the water works and Brittany sure knows this. In the years they've known each other; she can probably count the number of times Santana has cried in front of her. Fourteen times in total, if you count her drunken hysterical outbursts. Even when her brother died, Brittany only saw her shed tears once and after that her tears remained sealed and she turned to anger and bitterness as her prime reactions. But that's how she is; she doesn't like crying. She probably should do it more often; Brittany thinks it helps a lot.

Finding Rosita's car wasn't difficult. One it was bright red and flashy; two it was one of the four cars parked in the "Permit Holders" parking area. Brittany parked her car swiftly beside the red coupe. She hurriedly took her seat belt off and made her way out. At a distance, the red car looks empty but now, being less than a metre away, she could hear the sobs before the person sobbing. The windows were tainted black and she knew Santana was probably thankful for that.

Now there's one thing she needs to do before she pull on the door handle. She needs to make sure she's strong enough for both of them, no matter what come out of her girlfriend's lips, because Santana needs her. She needs Brittany to be the anchor that keeps her steady, so she doesn't just sail away. So Brittany takes a deep breath while she ran her fingers through blonde hair.

She pulls on the door handle and it's locked.

.Tap.

No answer; just sobs.

.

"San, honey, it's me. Please just open the door." She spoke as she leaned onto the driver's side window; both hands on the side of her face so she could take a peek inside.

Her heart dropped as soon as she saw the image of Santana's body trembling with sobs on the driver's seat. Her head was resting on the steering wheel; both hands grasping the wheel so tight her knuckles were turning white.

"I need you to open the door babe. Please, talk to me. I can't stand here seeing you like this." She begged, hoping to God Santana would hear her voice through her own sobs.

The door finally opens and Santana tries her best to compose herself by stopping her reckless crying and furiously wiping the tears off her face. She doesn't want to look weak. Not even in front of the only person who really knows her. She doesn't want to have to go into detail and explain what just happened because she's afraid a nervous breakdown might occur. She stands up, straightening her appearance as if nothing happened but the way the tears are still pooling around her eyes it's kind of difficult to ignore the sinking feeling in her gut.

She doesn't need to say anything and Brittany's body is instantly pressed against hers; the blonde's arms encircling her waist as she pulls Santana closer, so close that they should as well be one person. She wanted to tell Brittany that she's fine, she's okay, but the familiar scent comforts her and she knows if she wanted to breakdown and cry, she could do it right here; in her arms. So she hugs the taller woman back. She embraces her like she's clinging on to her dear life as she lets her tears overcome her once again. Her body starts to tremble and her knees feel so unstable that she's so certain Brittany was the only reason why she's still standing up.

Brittany doesn't say anything. She doesn't ask Santana what happened because she knows her girlfriend. She'll talk when she's comfortable talking and frankly right now, doesn't seem like the right time to talk. Not when she's practically holding the brunette up and she could feel tears soaking through her shirt. She's so worried about the body shuddering under her embrace and for once, she want to barge into that hospital room and demand for some answers but obviously she knows that would not be a good idea. So she holds Santana in her arms; she doesn't try to soothe her by running her hands up and down her back; she just holds her tight because she's afraid that the brunette might up and leave, not physically but emotionally.

Brittany drives them back to the Lopez house. Santana insisted she leave her mother's keys at the reception desk because the woman needed to get home later; Brittany offers to do it. She didn't need to hear the question leave the brunette's lips, she saw brown eyes silently begging and it doesn't take long for her to get it.

The car ride is silent. Neither of them wanted to break it because it was strangely comforting and Santana's sobs have reduced to individual tears escaping her eyes. She's calmed down and Brittany gets a sense of relief. Their hands are intertwined on top of the centre console; Santana's grip is gentle but firm like she's making sure Brittany isn't going to leave and the blonde isn't. She's not going anywhere else.

"You need a drink?" Brittany finally asks as they say around the kitchen island. It was an innocent question but she was maybe hoping to start a conversation.

Santana smiles timidly and nods. She's fiddling with her hands, something she does when she's uneasy and it doesn't go by unnoticed by her girlfriend.

"Can you tell me what happened?" her tone is almost pleading. She just wants to understand what happened. Like she has no clue at all and Santana doesn't just reduce into a ball of weeping fits. It must be something serious.

Santana looks up at her; her eyes red from exhaustion and crying. She opens her mouth to speak but quickly clamps it back down because really, how do you start?

"Remember when we were younger and during our sleepovers you would always ask me why my dad was never around?" she starts, not really knowing where she's going with this.

Brittany nods, shuffling her seat closer to Santana so know they're face to face. She reaches out to take her girlfriend's hand in hers, it was instinct.

"And I always told you he's busy at work because he saves lives. I looked up to him so much. He was this real image of a super hero to me." She purses her lips as she recalls those old memories, "Then eventually, we grew older and I started to realize that it wasn't because he was busy at work; he always had time for my brother; it was because he just seemed to avoid me. I didn't really know why and so I thought that it was my fault, you know like I wasn't good enough?" she explained trying to fight the tears that are once again pooling around her eyes.

Brittany smiled sympathetically because she knew about those times. The times when Santana would randomly show up at her house late at night, a sad smile plastered across her face as she held up DVDs and snacks asking the blonde if they could hang out. She knew then Santana had more issues than everyone around them thought. She wasn't a bitch because she's a bad person; she was that way because she felt unloved and Brittany wanted to change that. She wanted to make her best friend feel the most loved person in the world.

"Anyway, I spent most of my adolescent life loathing him for not loving me the way he loved my brother and loathing myself for not being good enough and not deserving to be loved by my own father." Her voice cracks because her vulnerability is off the charts right now, "And my mother, she's great with me but she didn't even try to fight for me, not once. Not even when my father spits out hurtful words in my face."

"Oh honey, I'm sorry you went through that. At least now it's over, right?" Brittany asks completely oblivious to everything that occurred at the hospital.

Santana lets out a sarcastic laugh, "That's the thing Britt; I thought it was finally over then today I just found out something that just fucked up my whole existence."

Brittany furrows her eyebrows in confusion, urging the brunette to elaborate.

"All this time I thought my father hated me because I was a bad daughter but then I just found out that I'm his illegitimate child from a crack whore—Elena." She spits it out like it's a bitter joke. "Shocking, huh?"

The blonde remained speechless; her eyes wide in shock. What can she say? She squeezed Santana's hands in sympathy. She could only imagine what her girlfriend is going through.

"Oh San, I'm so sorry." She says because it's proving to be difficult to think of the right words to say. She stands up from her chair and steps towards Santana, enveloping the brunette in a comforting hug. "Babe…"

Santana hugs her back. She doesn't mind that Brittany is having a hard time letting words out; it's totally understandable; she's just so grateful that there is someone here holding her. And it's the most important person in her life.

"I love you so much, San. Don't forget that, okay?" Brittany whispers against her girlfriend's temple, as she plants a kiss.

"Thank you, B. I love you too." She replies, breaking free from the hug as she stands up to face the blonde. "I'm just thankful you're here." She says before leaning in to close the gap between them.

As soon as their lips connect, Brittany knows this kiss isn't about love or lust. It's a kiss full of unspoken gratitude that Santana cannot put into words because it's just impossible to. It's for all the nights they spent snuggling in their beds watching pointless movies; laughing and joking around. It's for all the times they would randomly drive around town in the middle of the night because Santana couldn't sleep and Brittany knew something was wrong so she wanted to cheer her best friend up. It's for Brittany's never failing ability to be patient even when Santana acts completely irrationally. It's for being in her life since she could remember, saving her from all her miseries and even herself sometimes. And lastly, as clichéd as it may be, it's for being her personal ray of sunshine; for being Brittany.

They love each other so much...damn it! Where is the Brittany to my Santana? haha...thanks for reading!