Chapter Thirteen
Merlin was tired and sore from a long day of riding. Just the day before he had been working diligently at his new job when suddenly it had hit him: he couldn't stay in Camelot. Almost every day since he had first arrived in Gaius' chambers had been spent with, and all about Arthur's safety and wellbeing. Now that he wasn't allowing himself to see him – and was trying to limit the time he spent thinking about him – he had felt a sort of disconnect from his life here in the castle. He considered his options. He could continue to live in the shadow of his feelings for Arthur and Arthur's duty to Camelot, or - he made up his mind.
Merlin quit his job, and that night over dinner he explained his plans to Gaius. He couldn't protect Arthur anymore if he couldn't be around him, and because of that he had decided to leave Camelot. In the morning, Gaius waved to Merlin as he rode away from the castle. He understood that he couldn't stop Merlin from making his own decisions, no matter how much he wanted him to stay. The sun was rising, the light a bright, brilliant gold of a new day. Shielding his eyes from the sun, Gaius felt a single tear fall down his cheek. He wondered if, at his age, he was ever going to see Merlin again.
It was hard for Merlin to leave Gaius, and on such short notice too, but he felt that it was for the best. The further he rode from Camelot, the deeper he could breathe. He thought that he might not see Arthur ever again, and as sad as that made him, he knew Arthur at least would recover. Merlin could take the burden of their loss if it meant Arthur could live the life he was supposed to live.
The night in the alley had convinced Merlin that Arthur wouldn't have been able to move on if Merlin was still around. Now he was certain Arthur could take the throne as he was meant to, marry, and give the world many little Arthur's to wreak havoc.
Now, uncomfortable and ready for a good night's rest, Merlin looked ahead to find a small Inn. Hoping he could stay there for the night, he tied up his horse and headed inside. After securing a room, Merlin went downstairs hoping for some warm food and something to drink. With a sigh, he sat down at the bar. Having just asked for a pint of whatever cider was available, he felt a strong hand grab his arm.
"Merlin? What the hell are you doing here?"