Passive Aggressive Note
PAN: WOULD YOU JUST STOP THAT?
by
PND and JudiKicksHiney
The Second Note
THE NOTE:
Isshin.
The explosion at the gas station. The one where you blew up my stethoscope (buy me a new one, ass). Do you remember it? I hope you do, because the police came to our dorm today to ask me about it.
Idiot.
I told them that my stupid roommate borrowed it and all I knew about the explosion was that there was one.
So. Expect a phone call from the police. Happy interrogation, Kurosaki.
THE REPLY:
I wasn't the one who blew up the building. It was a monster with big teeth. Stop blaming me.
THE BUILD-UP:
It must have been one extreme monster.
It was. Come to think of it, it might have been your sister.
I wouldn't say things like that about my sister, Isshin. Things like that get back to her.
Because her little brother's a big, fat tattle tale!
No, because this conversation is being carried out through Post-Its on the front of our door.
Stop being so realistic. It's boring.
I will continue to be realistic in the hope that it will possibly bore you to death. I would love to have the dorm to myself.
They'd probably replace me with that Kanonji kid you hate.
...I hate you.
On a different subject, my toothbrush is missing. You haven't blown it up, have you? If you used it to clean the toilet, your Hawaiian print shirt is doomed.
Which one? I have dozens.
All of them.
Bastard. No, I haven't seen your toothbrush.
I hope you're not lying. Those hideous shirts are not worth saving. They're abominations. A lot like that Kanonji kid's cape.
I like his cape. It's got flair.
THE CLIMAX:
Your lack of taste alone should be reason enough for me to get away with murdering you.
I'm keeping these notes as evidence in case you do end up murdering me.
Don't lie. You're keeping these notes because you think you're witty.
Never mind that it takes you almost two days to reply.
Complimenting yourself because no one else will? Hah.
Complementing myself? I think you read that last note wrong.
At least I know the difference between compliment and complement.
THE CONCLUSION:
Isshin, if you ever attempt to take me to one of those places ever again, I will not take responsibility for my subsequent actions.
What's wrong with those places. Those "girls" were all over you.
Don't.
Kurosaki, I do not ever want to be reminded of last night.
"Oh, Ryuuken! What a manly name." "He's so pretty. I'm jealous." "Ryuu, do you have a love-ah!"
Bwahahahaha! Kurosaki! I do not know how you did it, but seeing Ishida drunk and covered with men-ladies was the most momentous event of this school year! Who knew he was so cuddly?
Bwahahahaha!
This is completely justifiable homicide.
I am absolved of all guilt in the double murder that is about to take place.
I know! I almost wanted to cuddle him myself! Joking!
Ishida-kun, you can't kill me just because you're a lousy drunk.
That must be one monstrous hangover! Bwahahaha!
Kanonji. If you dare to stick another post it on our door I'll ruin your cape.
What a scawy thweat, Wyuu-kuuuuun!
Every time I see your black eye and swollen nose a feeling of satisfaction warms my heart, Kurosaki.
Who knew such a ladies man could open a door so hard?
Indeed.
AN: Yay! Note number two with guest PNAs by Don Kanonji… I hope he wasn't also attending medical school. That's just a scary thought. Thanks for all the reviews!