With a yawn, Antonio blinked into the bright light of his room. It was becoming a familiar sensation; the sharp swooping sensation in his stomach, the momentary dreamlike state of confusion, the crushing disappointment and then the final dullness of acceptance. He'd been visiting Lovino for about a month now and had settled himself into a routine that maximised the time that he got to see Lovino for. It mostly involved sleeping all the time, and racing through everything else in order to do so. He was getting twelve hours a night on average, up to eighteen or nineteen on weekends. So much time, all to spend with his precious Lovino, just the two of them. It was beautiful.
School was now pretty much a waste of time, even more so than most people thought it was. Admittedly, time spent with Gilbert and Francis was as amusing as ever, but Antonio couldn't completely block the pang of loneliness that always appeared when he wasn't with Lovino, and a lot of the time, he wasn't with the other two anyway. It was even worse in classes; he spent most of the time staring out of the window waiting for the clock to shift its hands at a pace faster than a lethargic snail.
As soon as it did, he swiftly walked home, raced through his homework (so there was no reason for him to get detentions for not doing it and lose precious time), made and ate a meal, then switched clothes and curled up somewhere to go to sleep. It was rarely later than six o'clock that he was finished, and he was never up later than seven. A couple of sleeping pills helped with that, if he took a long time to get off.
Weekends were a bit different, but that was because he got the chance to sleep in until about two in the afternoon. He usually did some washing after that, to make sure he had enough clothes for the rest of the week, then went to the store for the week's provisions, checked everything else was ok, ate some food, then back to his heavenly dream-state. This time generally couldn't come fast enough, but this was really where the Ambien and Eszopiclone were paying for themselves.
OOOoooOOO
"Psst, Toni! What'd you get for 4b?"
Antonio glanced up from his work and locked his gaze with Gilbert's piercing red eyes. "Haven't done that one yet, Gil." He probably should have by now, with it being halfway through the lesson, but Antonio really couldn't be bothered with long sheets of pointless, repetitive questions at the moment.
Gilbert stuck out his tongue. "Aw, man. Franny, what'd you get?"
The blond, sat opposite, fixed Gilbert with a suspicious look. "Have you actually done the question, Gilbert, or is this a trick to get the answer without doing any work?"
"Kesese! Of course I've done it! I want to compare answers." Antonio hid a grin as he spotted Gilbert's arm coincidentally covering his paper.
Francis raised an eyebrow. "Really? Then what did you get?"
"Huh? I'm not telling you. What happens if you're trying to pull that trick on me in reverse? I'm not giving you my awesome answer for you to steal! Kese...oh fuck you, Francis." Gilbert scowled and flopped onto the table, glaring at Francis between folded arms. "The awesome president of awesome doesn't need to do work."
"That would work," Francis admitted, "were you actually the council president. The election's on Friday."
"I already won by default," Gilbert pouted. "'Cos I'm awesome. I'm ahead in the polls anyway, so screw you."
"Don't count your chickens, Gil. All sorts of strange things can happen," Antonio muttered absent-mindedly, tapping his pencil against his fingers.
Francis frowned. "What sort of 'strange things', Antoine?"
Antonio blinked. He hadn't meant to say that aloud. Unexpected things meant Lovino, and he couldn't really tell his friends about that. Not yet at any rate. "Ah, nothing specific. It's an expression." Oh damn. He hadn't meant to sound defensive.
"I don't own any chickens," Gilbert interjected. "My little buddy here isn't a chicken." There was a muffled 'cheep' of agreement from inside his bag at this.
"Beilschmidt! Carriedo! Bonnefoy! Stop talking and get back to work!" a crisp voice interrupted them. Antonio glanced up and spotted his teacher stood at the front of the class, brandishing a ruler and a peeved expression. He quickly apologised and ducked his head back down to face his paper.
He didn't notice Gilbert and Francis exchange concerned glances next to him.
OOOoooOOO
Antonio crossed the green between the North and West blocks, glad to get out of the mind-numbing lesson he'd just been sat in for the best part of an hour. He'd nearly fallen asleep and, as nice as that would be, it wouldn't have been the greatest idea in the middle of class. Might be an idea to keep an eye on himself for a bit. He couldn't be too careful.
"Ve~," a familiar voice sounded behind him. "Big Brother Antonio?"
Antonio turned and spotted the auburn-haired Italian. "Hi, Feliciano. How are you?"
Feliciano braved an attempt at a smile. "I'm getting better, I think, thank you~. I was wondering – could you help me out with my homework tonight? I was at music practice instead of the maths lesson yesterday and I don't know how to do the homework. I was hoping you or Kiku could help me with it, 'cos Ludi's got cadets on Tuesday evenings, and since I can't find Kiku, I was wondering if you were free tonight?"
Hmm. Tonight...that wasn't good. He'd promised Lovino he'd show up before a particular time every day and Lovino got really mad if he was late without any prior warning. And, cute as Lovino was when he got mad, Antonio didn't much like being the direction or cause of his anger and sadness.
"I'm really sorry, Feli, but tonight's not good. I can do tomorrow, though."
Feliciano shook his head as his face fell. "The homework's in for tomorrow. I need to do it tonight. Are you sure you aren't able to help?"
Antonio bit his lip. It felt awful to disappoint Feliciano, but he really didn't want to upset his brother. "I'm sorry, Feli, I really am. I just can't do tonight at such short notice. But, if it's maths, you're probably better off asking Kiku anyway."
"Ve~," Feliciano sighed in dismay. "I'll go look for Kiku, then. Thanks anyway. Bye-bye, Toni." He ran off towards the buildings behind him, homework folder clutched in one arm.
OOOoooOOO
Gilbert was sprawled out across his sofa later that evening with a can of beer in one hand and the TV remote in the other, laughing loudly at the old sitcom episode blaring from the sound system. He was lazily content; there was nothing to do but loaf around the house all evening doing whatever the hell he felt like. Ludwig had wisely made himself scarce a while back and gone up to his bedroom with a quiet 'I've got work to do', so Gilbert didn't even have him nagging about having his feet on the sofa, or leaving rubbish on the floor. Ah, Glückseligkeit.
He was just about to make the perilous decision whether or not he could be bothered to go into the kitchen to find some food, when his phone buzzed with a short jingle from 'I'm Sexy And I Know It'. With some difficulty, he retrieved it from his pocket to see the screen informing him he had a text from Francis.
[Come to my house now. V urgent. Love Francis]
Gilbert sighed. If that guy thinks I'm gonna just get up and go have sex with him at the drop of a hat, he can think again. The awesome me is not moving for that. Wouldn't do so anyway, in fact, even if it was urgent. He was about to switch the phone off when it buzzed again.
[Apologies if that was misleading. It's about Antonio - Feli and I have been discussing things. Need to talk soon as poss.]
Now this was a different matter altogether. Antonio had been acting increasingly strangely lately, and Gilbert was rather worried for his friend. And it looked like Francis was going to try do something about it. May as well join in. He immediately tapped back a reply and pulled himself up off the sofa, killing the TV with his spare hand.
"West!" he shouted upstairs while searching for his shoes in the hall cupboard. "I'm goin' out to Franny's! Back later!" A quiet call back indicated that Ludwig had heard.
A short car ride later, Gilbert was outside the door to Francis' house. To his surprise, the door was answered by Feliciano, who was still in his school uniform.
"Ve~. Hiya Gil! Big Brother Francis said you were on your way. Come in, come in!" He stepped back and Gilbert followed him into Francis' living room.
Francis was spread across a chaise longue with a glass of wine in one hand and half his shirt buttons undone, but then that was completely normal for Francis. He waved his free hand in greeting and motioned for Gilbert to sit down.
"Bonjour. Sorry it's a bit on the late side, but Feli approached me earlier and we agreed we needed to talk about this sooner as opposed to later."
"Ve~," Feliciano agreed, as Gilbert sat down next to him, sinking into the plush white leather of the sofa. "I'm really worried about Toni, he was acting completely out of character earlier, and from the sounds of it you guys are too." He wore an uncharacteristically sombre and worried expression.
Gilbert nodded. "Agreed. We have a problem."
Glückseligkeit – bliss
Just to clarify, there's time-gap between this and the previous chapter of about a month.
This chapter was hard to write...to the point that the succeeding chapter was almost complete before this was halfway. Dunno when I'll get it done, though. School starts again on Tuesday. It suuuucks. *gripe gripe dread*
I felt awful at some points in this...I've wanted to hug Feli so much during this fic...need to find a way to make him happy later on to make up for it~