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Harry Potter And The Father

Chapter 18

Order members thoughts and another day at Snape's quarters

Every single one of the Order members had been shocked with the new information they had just received. They felt betrayed by Dumbledore and Lupin, betrayed on behalf of what had happened to Harry. A little boy they had all sworn to protect after Voldemort had been vanquished, the reason being Dumbledore wanted them to because of what Sirius Black had done. They had all violated that oath without even knowing, they were supposed to take care of Harry and make sure he was protected. It seemed unreal with the small boy they had met was supposed to defeat Voldemort.

Shacklebolt shuddered remembering the look Severus threw them when they had winced. It couldn't be helped; they had been shocked as hell when he smiled showing his teeth or what was left of them. Big gaping holes, around six of them that they could see. It wasn't a pretty sight on one so young; they could only imagine the state he must have been in when Severus found him. Shacklebolt hated failure it wasn't an option in his line of work. He should have said something, anything, he knew blood didn't always come first it was something he had learned early in his career. Mothers and fathers killing their children, because they were squibs, twins or even not having much magic at all. He remembered the case where the child was born without a proper arm, the wand arm ironically enough and the father had taken one look and killed her. Even magic couldn't fix something as severe as that, the child's life had been cut short. Shacklebolt remembered picking the day old girl up and was very saddened; she had been a beautiful little girl who hadn't deserved what her very short life had thrown at her. He shook his head grimly taking those horrible thoughts and pushing them behind his Occlumency shields. He wouldn't be doing Dumbledore any favours that was for sure, if the Order was needed again he would join sure, but not for Dumbledore and he would do the missions he felt were needed not everything he asked him to do.

Lupin was furious he went back to his flat he had in the Muggle world, he called in sick and stayed in all day. Drinking fire whiskey wrathfully, he couldn't believe it after all those years Snape had finally found out. He had hoped to avoid it, Lily might have thought Snape was alright but he, Peter, Sirius and James had known even if Sirius betrayed them in the end. He had never wanted Snape to find out he was a Death Eater through and through. The fact his cub was now in his clutches didn't bode well, it had been tough remaining away while he was at the Dursley's but it had been better than what Snape could do. Turn him into a mini Snape, Harry probably already hated his father James with a vengeance. He shuddered remembering the look of the small child he looked like Snape. He should have looked like James; all pureblood children took after their fathers not mothers something must have been wrong with Lily for that to happen. Why James chose her of all people he didn't know, his cub should look like his father not Snape. A growl left his lips but it was slurred with alcohol induced tiredness.

He hadn't failed to notice the Order members reactions, he felt wary with that not many trusted him because of his monthly problem. The fact he had kept it secret made him look evil in the eyes of the Order but maybe he could explain. If he explained surely they would see just how right he was, after all they surely didn't trust Snape he was a spy and not for them but against them. He was sure of it, he just needed to prove it and get Harry taken out of his care. The glamour's could be put back on and he would once again look like his father. Just like he was always meant to, yes that was what he would do thought Remus as unconsciousness claimed him in his small disgusting bare (all bar a couch, bed, and a small rickety TV) it's all he had been able to afford. The rest of his money went on pain reliever potions; he would soon regret ever making an enemy of Severus Snape.

Edgar Bones felt utterly disgruntled; he couldn't believe Dumbledore could allow any child to be hurt. He had a niece, Susan the same age and he did not like the implications he had heard tonight. His parents were killed when he was young, and he had practically raised both his sisters Amelia and Susan's mother Alma. Amelia was smart and she would go places some day, the same couldn't be said for his other sister Alma. Alma had a child out of wedlock he and her sister wasn't too happy about that. Susan Bones was the name of his niece, she had the same ginger hair as the rest of the family, and he adored spoiling her. His wife was going to go nuts when she heard about what had happened tonight, she wanted a child more than anything and they hadn't been blessed with any so far. He would be lucky if he continued attending Order meetings after this, without more ado he apparated home to where he lived under the Fidelus charm he wanted nothing happening to his family better safe than sorry in his eyes.

He sighed looking at the picture of the Order when he entered his home, they were mostly all dead. Caradoc Dearborn died six months after the picture was taken. Benjy Fenwick died a most gruesome death, only bits of him were ever found Edgar shuddered in remembrance he had been the one to find the head. Marlene McKinnon and her family were found killed too; the worst by far was the fates of Frank and Alice Longbottom also the Potter's.

Then there was the death of Dorcas Meadows killed by Voldemort herself because she was a threat to his power. She had been an awesome witch unfortunately she hadn't stood a chance against the evil that was Lord Voldemort. "He's done now hopefully that will help you rest in peace old friend" said Edger running his pinkie along the photo edge.

Then there was Molly's brothers Gideon and Fabian Prewett who had died taking out a group of five Death Eaters. Edger had nothing but the greatest respect for them, Molly had been pregnant with twins when it happened and they were named after their uncles. They had been great laughs those men would have been even greater dads if given the chance. "Dumbledore best be luck you are both gone, for what he has done no doubt you would have skinned him alive" said Edger wryly to the red haired twins in the photo.

When he got to Sirius Black he grimaced, that man had betrayed the Potter's and he hoped he burned in hell. Not only that he had killed his other friend Peter Pettigrew hadn't been the smartest of the bunch but his death had been worse than Benjy blown to pieces.

There we an entire new Order now, much bigger than the one that had existed before Voldemort's downfall. Molly for instance hadn't been a member until her brothers had died. They were disgusting that was for sure, Diggle, Fletcher all sorts of characters including Figg a squib for goodness sake they might as well invite Flitch the caretaker up and be done with it.

"Talking to them again?" asked the feminine voice of his wife from the kitchen smiling sadly at him.

"Sorry love I know it disturbs you" said Edger smiling softly forgetting them and concentrating on the living as much as it hurt to say goodbye to his friends, brothers in arms the people he had trusted to have his back. The people that actually did have his back on more than one occasion.

Molly went home with Arthur and ended up sitting in her room sobbing her heart out, clutching Ginny in her arms wondering what kind of monster Lupin, Dumbledore and the Dursley's were. She had trusted Dumbledore and Lupin; she couldn't imagine keeping a secret of this magnitude from someone. Sure Lupin and Severus hadn't liked each other at school but to keep the fact Lily was his twin from him was going too far. She had wanted to throttle Lupin and Dumbledore; she hadn't gotten to do either before Arthur was dragging her away.

"Calm down dear, he's in very capable hands" said Arthur softly.

"What if the others don't think so?" asked Molly, she mothered everyone even Severus during Order meetings. He was just too bloody skinny for his own good, and she loved feeding him up, she also sent him biscuits every now and again. She knew how much he loved them, he eyed them every Order meeting and only ate after everyone was occupied. Molly was good at paying attention to something and making them unaware of it, so her children didn't even know how much Molly kept an eye on them. She did the same with Severus, she felt for the poor man and to spy took guts. She didn't care that he had joined the Death Eaters when he was younger, everyone made mistakes. Severus had even warned Fabian and Gideon that Death Eaters were coming after them, a week before it happened. However, her proud brothers had remained out in the open and ended up taking the majority of the Death Eaters that had been there with them.

Arthur had a great amount of respect for Severus, like his wife he knew it took guts to go to meetings and bring back information. One wrong move and it would have all been over, and Severus' life forfeit he had paid the price for a mistake he had made as a young boy. He couldn't imagine learning that the person you loved was actually in fact your sister. He shuddered at the thought of for instance Molly being his sister after years of knowing her, poor Severus must be going through hell.

"Then we will make sure he knows we approve and know he wouldn't hurt him, nobody in the Order can dispute that fact. They all saw how Harry clung to his new dad as if petrified he would leave him" said Arthur sadly hugging his wife comfortingly meanwhile ensuring his daughter didn't get squashed.

"Yes you are correct; I still cannot believe what Lupin did Arthur! He knew and kept it secret! He knew the Dursley's he was at Lily and James' wedding!" snapped Molly, she unfortunately hadn't been. She had gone into labour earlier that day and Arthur wasn't about to leave his wife's side not that she would let him. He hadn't gone anywhere for a second because of the death grip she had on his hand. Poppy had to heal his hand as three of his fingers had been broken.

The stories she had heard about Sirius and James' antics hadn't amused her - they had been Muggles unable to fight back against levitation spells. After what happened she had realized perhaps she should have known Sirius had shown his true colours at the wedding taunting Muggles like that.

"I know I just don't understand it either" sighed Arthur upset he knew just how much Severus had longed for a family and yet Lupin had done the same. Perhaps old grudges were harder to break than he assumed he hadn't agreed with the fact Harry was to be brought up by his Muggle family. No wizarding child should be taken from the wizarding world and dumped into an unfamiliar one. Hell he and Molly would have taken the child in if it had been possible. Unfortunately the Weasley's were related to the Potter's to even have a leg to stand on in Ministry court to gain custody of Harry.

That night Molly didn't indulge Ginny Weasley her much wanted little girl with stories about the glorious wonderful 'boy who lived' she hadn't been able to speak about him never mind tell his story to her daughter. Nights afterwards even with Ginny's begging she never told it, Harry Potter-Snape was a living breathing little boy not a hero she had been wrong to tell it the way she had. Seeing him like that had woken something in her, she knew herself she would be furious if they did that to her little Ronnie. After what he had gone through she just couldn't do it, seeing that heartbreaking smile on his face petting an owl - an owl had blown her away.

This wasn't a story; it was real life a boy had lost his parents to a mad man no matter how desperate and dark the times were. She had gotten lost in all the happiness and made the story up to settle her children at night.

"Good morning Harry just how long have you been awake?" asked Severus quietly upon seeing him in the living room instead of his bed.

Harry looked up and smiled unsurely he wasn't sure what to make of his daddy's question was he mad or not? He was so hard to read unlike his Uncle Vernon, then again his Uncle had always been angry at him. "I've been a good boy" said Harry looking sad.

"I have no doubt you have been a good boy Harry, how long have you been up?" asked Severus once more concerned about him.

"I don't know" whispered Harry feeling rather fearful.

"I see" said Severus settling down next to Harry and scooping the scared child up in his arms and cuddled him. Letting Harry know he wasn't in trouble for being unable to answer his question, he shouldn't really have asked. He knew as well as everyone else child had no sense of time; he could have been sitting there for minutes or hours.

"Would you like to name your baby owl?" asked Severus, "Blinky!"

"Yes Master Severus?" asked Blinky popping in right away as if he had nothing better to do than serve him.

"Breakfast for two of us please and some milk in a dish and a stopper please" said Severus, he had stoppers but they had been used for potion ingredients. He didn't want to risk anything happening to the small owl so he asked Blinky for one that was used for cooking much safer.

"Mine?" asked Harry his eyes round in astonishment, his darker green eyes with swirling black pieces were more evident than ever.

"Of course" said Severus softly, running his hand soothingly up and down Harry's back.

"I don't know any good names daddy do you?" asked Harry looking imploringly at Severus.

"The woman in the shop had already decided on a name but the owl is young enough to have different one. She named her Hedwig after a saint no doubt would you like for her to keep it?" asked Severus softly.

"Hedwig?" considered the three years old seriously his little forehead wrinkled in consideration. What if his daddy really liked that name and didn't want to change it? He liked it was nice it suited her so he nodded his head and said "I like it" very softly as if expecting to be told that he was to change the name for simply agreeing.

"Then we keep it" said Severus in satisfaction.

Blinky popped in with their food and placed the milk with the stopper on the table causing Hedwig to twitter. Her amber eyes wide she eyed the milk hungrily, she had to wait unfortunately until Severus was finished.

"Can I help daddy?" asked Harry looking excited at the prospect.

"Come here son" said Severus putting down the stopper and lifting Harry up, setting him on his feet beside him. He helped Harry pick up the stopper which was already full off milk, and guided him to the owl's mouth. Telling him softly to squeeze only a little as the baby couldn't handle much at once. Together father and son fed the tiny owl who was giving off appreciative hoots every time he drank down some milk. It caused Harry to giggle and Severus felt nothing but deep satisfaction at hearing it.

"Look daddy he drank it all" said Harry his voice full of childish wonder.

"Indeed she did" corrected Severus "She's been very good hasn't she?"

"Yes" nodded Harry eagerly to emphasise his answer.

"Then we must get her a mouse whenever she can handle them Hm" suggested Severus softly, picking up his son. Harry giggled softly and curled up in Severus' arms feeling so happy he wasn't able to believe it. He couldn't believe how his life was turning out, he had daddy, one that didn't hurt him, he got lots to eat and new things he hadn't tasted before. His daddy had even bought him his very own owl and all the toys he could ever dream of owning.

Then there was a knock on the door, Severus didn't get up just aimed his wand at the door and opened it.

"Hello Severus may we come in?" asked Poppy softy, she had Minerva with her.

"You know you don't need to ask" said Severus smirking softly.

"True but if you wanted the day to yourself and your son we couldn't blame you" said Minerva smartly.

"Indeed and when do you ladies ever take no for an answer?" smirked Severus smartly.

"Very true Severus" said Minerva smugly as she walked into the room sitting down quite comfortably Poppy of course followed her lead. Severus shut the door with a flick of his wand once more.

"I'd say the Order meeting went very well Severus wont you?" said Poppy mischievously.

"Id say so, considering every single one of them was speechless" said Severus amused his eyes darkened then he said "Or at least most of them" thinking of one in particular - Remus Lupin.

"I cannot believe what Remus knew! All this time of course we should have realized. We know Werewolf's sense of smell was ten times stronger than our smell he probably knew in your first year!" said Minerva shaking her head angrily.

"I know" sighed Severus, wondering how different life would have been if Lupin had said something. No doubt Lily probably smelt very similar to him, it almost crippled him last night thinking about the 'what if's' and 'buts'. He didn't understand how Lily could have kept it to herself; she couldn't have been that scared of Tobias Snape she had never met him. Of course he had told her all about him, and he cursed himself for it, maybe Lily would have told him about their relationship if he hadn't.

Even as Severus spoke, he had Harry within his arms at all times, right now he was standing up petting the owl cooing softly. Harry was never loud and boisterous, he preferred to remain silent. If Severus hadn't been aware of Harry's presence he wouldn't have known the child was there he was that quiet.

"Well I certainly won't blame you for hating him now" said Minerva grimly.

"You did before?" sneered Severus despite the sneer his voice was calm as not to alert Harry of his anger.

"I did Remus had nothing to do with the prank Black pulled on you, you know that. The boy wouldn't have willing hurt another soul and made another like him" said Minerva. "Or at least the boy I thought I knew, you think after all those years you could trust someone and that you knew them only for it to fall apart in seconds"

"That might be true but still the hate I have for James is nothing on how I feel about Black. Lupin was beside James now, now he's competing with Black, I cannot decide which I hate the most" said Severus his voice emotionless. Harry knew his last name, he wasn't about to scare him by using it so he with a certain reluctance used James, hopefully Harry couldn't understand what he was saying.

"I'd say Black" said Minerva her lips in a thin line she hadn't realized how hard it was to keep your cool when you were angry. She had to take her hat of to Severus, who had done it even at the Order meeting so he didn't scare Harry.

"I'd have to agree" said Poppy, she had been good friends with Lily and had actually delivered Harry in the hospital wing at Hogwarts. It had been on the stroke of midnight that Harry had come into the world. She had seen Lily and James pale drastically as the implications set in. Dumbledore had told Lily and James as well as Frank and Alice as they had been the only ones pregnant at the time. Frank and Alice had been in the same situation in St. Mungo's.

"I just don't understand why Lily went along with it, I mean she wasn't too fond of Pettigrew or Black" sighed Severus looking extremely agitated "This was her sons life we were talking about…she knew I was her brother why didn't she trust me with the information and as the secret keeper. I'd have died before putting her in danger, even without knowing she was my sister she knew that"

"We shall never have answers to those questions Severus but we know James obviously trusted Black with his wife and son" sighed Poppy looking upset.

"I know I just wish I could speak to her" sighed Severus.

"I know Severus there's so much you want answers too it's just very unfortunate you cannot get them. Do not let those questions get you down, you have a son now and you should just concentrate on that forget all else" said Minerva adamantly.

Severus smirked and nodded, he looked down at his son when he heard him sigh. He picked him up concerned; he could see the lingering of pain in those eyes and sighed sadly himself.

"Are you sore?" asked Severus his voice a little cold showing Harry he wasn't happy.

Harry tried to look down but Severus' fingers caught his chin forcing him to look up. He saw his daddy was disappointed in him and he felt something squirm uncomfortably in his tummy. He wasn't sure what it was but it made his eyes tear up at the thought of his daddy hating him.

"Yes" whispered Harry eventually a sob stuck in his throat. A few tears still tracking down his face. As usual he cried silently, unless he was sleep and having a nightmare.

Severus sighed sadly, wiping away the tears knowing he had caused them made him feel awful. However he had to get though to Harry somehow that he needed to know when he was in pain. He couldn't resort to leaving him alone for any period of time, the only way he could show he was disappointed at this stage was to let Harry see he was disappointed in him.

"Where do you hurt?" asked Severus shaking his head slightly, both woman in his quarters had stayed quiet letting the new father deal with it. He had the experience whereas they didn't so they knew Severus knew what he was doing.

"My back" said Harry painfully smothering a sob, he was used to pain but the disappointment his daddy was displaying hurt somewhere else - his heart.

Severus summoned a potion, holding onto the back of his sons head he softly told him to swallow it. Harry did as he was told, holding his hands out tears in those beautiful emerald eyes. Severus sighed softly, before setting his son against his chest kissing his forehead softly.

"I'm sorry daddy I didn't want to leave Hedwig" whispered Harry painfully.

"Don't do it again and I'll forgive you" said Severus carding his hand through his son's hair.

Harry buried himself in the crook of his daddy's neck as he began to feel sleepy.

"Does he do that a lot still?" asked Poppy softly speaking lower than normal.

"No, he hasn't I didn't think I'd regret getting that blasted owl so soon" said Severus in disappointment.

"All children do that Severus" whispered Minerva softly.

"It's not something I want Harry doing, I want him to trust me to come to me straight away" said Severus adjusting Harry slightly as he was completely asleep sprawled across his chest.

"He will learn you know he will it's going to take time" said Poppy quietly.

"I know" admitted Severus reluctantly.

"Well I'm going to enjoy the rest of my Sunday before we have classes again" said Minerva getting up, Poppy did the same and Severus smiled grimly and nodded at them. Once they were away he spelled his rooms closed and warded again, that done he did indeed take his son to his bedroom after fifteen minutes of holding onto him just for the sake of it.

Will Sirius Black be guilty of betraying the Potters? killing Peter Pettigrew and those Muggles? will Remus be deranged? will he try and kidnap Harry? work with Sirius Black remus beliving him innocent or even working with him and knowing he wasnt? what do you think of the way i have remus this time? a little to obsessed with James Potter! did you like the fact i mentioned all the old order members and had edgar bones survive this time around? anything youd like to see happen? who will break it to the press that harry's been adopted? so far only the Order fudge and malfoys know! : ) R&R please!