Chapter 4: MrFumo's Master Plan! What the Hell is a Fumo?
"Fumo, wake up!"
"Like, we need to finish like, the cliffhanger?"
Fine, not like I get a good pay for this anyways...
Sorry readers, took a little break for a while. Back to story.
"Alright Fumo. What's this Fumo clan?" demanded Nobu.
"The Fumo clan are the rulers of this fanfic," answered MrFumo. "Without us, there would be no Duel Masters, Fumo Saga Fanfic."
"So like, are you guys like, the good guys or like, the bad guys?" questioned Donathan.
"More like the cops of the series," replied MrFumo. "We just protect the fanfic and capture what needs to be done."
"Yeah, like, that's what Team Rocket said like, every time right before they steal pikachu," responsed Donathan.
"Do they look like Jessie and James?," MrFumo addressed as he points with his badass finger.
"The little creepy Jade and big ass Toru?" thought Nobu.
"Their Fumo code names are Mini Fumo and Sumo Fumo. Members of the Fumo clan."
"More like Stalker Fumo..." Nobu murmured.
"I brought you all here today becau_"
"Like, we already know?" said Donathan with that dumb blonde attitude. "You told us like an hour ago before Nobu's rape scene showed up on like, the last episode?"
"Shit! How does he know about my rape scene?" Nobu cried in his mind.
"Well if you don't shut up and let me talk, I'll change that gay personality of yours into straight!" demanded MrFumo.
"Like, hell no. That is so not bitchin." replied Donathan.
"Wait, he can do?" laughed Nobu. "Imagine Donathan straight, haha"
Donathan turned to Nobu with a bigger pissed-off face and raised up a cellphone with a photo that Nobu recognizes in his so-called nightmare.
Nobu's smiling face turned into tears. Donathan gives him that attitude look as he throws the cellphone back to the stalker girl.
"Ahem, as I was saying, the three of you are here because this fanfic is not receiving as many readers as other fanfics."
"As script writer of this fanfic, I will be discussing the newly planned scripted of this season!" yelled the mastermind raising his badass fist. "DJ Fumo, cue the Nightcore!"
High pitch Nightcore songs from that random DJ in the back started rising at super speed as MrFumo annouces these rules.
"My first order to reconstructing this script is... Mokubo stars in a new segment at the end of each chapter!" said MrFumo with a badass finger pointing at the little leprechaun .
"Jiminy Crickets! I star in my own section?" Mokubo quickly said as he immediately changes his attention from "she who stares" to MrFumo.
"Yes, but...you are also getting cut from this original fanfic," MrFumo quickly said. "Now to the next_"
"WHAT?" yelled Mokubo.
"Look, you're not...character material," answered MrFumo. "Everyone hates nerdy midget and I can't remember what high ass dope I was smoking when scripting chapter one. Plus, we gotta to stop stealing those "shut up Mokubo" lines from Yugioh Abridged."
"Then what's this segment that requires my expertise?" complained Mokubo.
"It has come to my attention that majority of fanfic readers don't play Duel Masters!," raged MrFumo as he took off the Kamina sunglasses and crushed them with his badass hand.
"Mokubo! You will be the one explain the rules of Duel Masters and all that other crap at the end of each chapter," MrFumo said with a powerful badass voice. "All the badass animes have one at the end. And since no one else wanted to do it, you must do it cuz everyone hates Mokubo."
"Haha sucker," laugh Nobu. "It's just like survivor. You wouldn't have lasted long."
"I demand an increase in salary for this!" complained Mokubo as nobody cares.
"Now for my next plan of action," said MrFumo as he takes out another pair of badass Kamina sunglasses. "Nobu, you gotta stop with the ike, yoshi, koi and all the other kiddy lines."
"Aww," whined Nobu. "But saying those lines gives me main character points to amp my poll rantings for the lead roll."
"Too bad kid!" yelled MrFumo as he crushes the second pair of sunglasses. "I was rereading the last couple of episodes and those lines sucked ass. Cmon, no one really speaks Japanese on this fanfic anyways."
"Bububut..."
"So from now on, no more ketto da, totomeda, and all that other da crap," MrFumo finalized. "I'm working on giving you guys catchphrases."
"Gee Willikers!" said Mokubo as he was trying out some new catchphrases for his characters. "Aww, why you have to give me the outdated ones."
"Now for my final Fumo plan of the episode is...drumroll please?" MrFumo says as he takes out another pair of Kamina sunglasses.
"I'm going to be holding a contest to see who will become the main character of this fanfic!" shouted MrFumo as he raise his glasses up in the air.
"Hell yea!" yelled Nobu.
"To be a main character, you must be using a dragon deck with one of the five cards that I fanficly made as of right now," said MrFumo as he somehow magically made a card appear out of nowhere with cheap flashy lights. "Everyone knows main characters always pwns with dragon decks."
"Like, wow. Chris Angel can do like, better and we all know that he's like, a fake," said Donathan with a bore. "And like, I'm not even dragon user so like what's in it for me?
"Umm...I'll... throw in a...love interest..guy..for you," MrFumo said as he made that bullshit up on the spot.
"Like, oh my gosh," excited Donathan. "As the Leeron of this fanfic, I think I it's like safe to say, finally! A fanfic that like, throws in some gay fan service."
"Hey, what was that about main characters? As in me?" Nobu desperately brought back. "I only have 1 dragon in my deck and that's Bolshack dragon!"
"You actually have two cuz you cheated on the last episo_"
"Shut up Mokubo," Nobu quickly replied.
"Then you're not qualified to be the new main character," answered MrFumo. "Besides, your ripoff copy of Shobu's season one deck sucked ass."
"Oh yea?" replied Nobu. "Then I challenge you to a duel! If I win, you have to make me the main character of this fanfic.
"You do know that since I'm in charge of scripting, I can easily make myself win right?" laughed MrFumo. "And we didn't even have the time to throw in a duel last episode cuz we're pushing six pages on both episode just to fill in plot holes.
"Dammit," realized Nobu. "He's like an anime version of Bruce Almighty. Breaking the fourth wall is like nothing for him."
"Well, if you still wanna shot at being main character, take the card," said MrFumo. "It's the only one left. Already gave the four other potential main characters their cards."
"One of them even left you a gift," reminded MrFumo as he picked up Ichigo's vizard mask.
"The mask freak!" shocked Nobu. "He's one of the four pricks I got to take out to become king of all main characters?"
"Yessssss," shouted and while choking as if he was on crack. "My bad, need to lite a cigarette. If I don't, I start gettin high and will probably kill things just like the dudes from Higarashi."
MrFumo pops out a stick to get all high and then goes into his smoking soberly state.
"Ight nigga," said MrFumo with a drunk voice. "Take your shit and get outta..." and the big guy falls down and knocks out cold.
The three all stared at the sleeping Fumo with puzzling faces.
"Like...is he like, dead?" Donathan pointed out with a not so badass but girly gay black polish fingernail.
"Over intoxication of smoking must have triggered his brain to malfunction," deducted Mokubo. "And that better be joke about demoting me from the regulars to the full time instructions manual. I'll be losing my screen time sharing it with the ending credits..."
"Umm, like guys," called Donathan in worried. "Like, why is the fire on his like, bud getting like bigger?"
The smoke from badass MrFumo's cigarette kept burning and soon the smoke was all over the room.
"This must be that shit Fumo been cracking on," thought Nobu as started going all loopy. "How the hell can you write a fanfic with all these damn... cake...isn't...a lie..."
"Fire...pew pew lasers..." murmured Mokubo as he faints.
"Like...paaaaaaastaaaaaaaaaa..." then trips and falls on Mokubo.
The last thing Nobu sees before collapsing is that stalker girl still eye gocking at him like no tomorrow and the big ass sunburned sumo snacking on some Doridos.
TO BE CONTINUED
"Okay...since this is the last chapter that I get to be on, let's just get this over with. Mokubo here. Presenting the first steps on learning how to play Duel Masters."
Rule 1: A Duel Masters deck contains exactly 40 cards and each card can only have up to four copies of the same card in a deck.
Rule 2: The goal of the game is to break all of your opponent's shields and_
"Woah, hold up nigga," said some black fatass who apparently has no name. "I hate you and Ima let you finish but I just want to say, Chicken Masters: In the Hood is one of the best fanfics ever made."
"Umm, yea..so, to break your opponent's sheilds, you must_"
"Hey!" shouted Nobu. "This is the second episode in a row that didn't have a duel! Isn't this fanfic suppose to be about card games every chapter?"
"Fumo!" raged Mokubo. "That's it, I quit! Kill my character! I don't care anymore!"
Credits: All made by MrFumo (u.u) .zZ