Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Academy.

Ch. 13 Jealousy

A million different emotions ran through me when I saw them together. Anger. Shock. Disbelief. Jealousy.

I should be the one Dimitri was kissing and holding. I should be the one that Dimitri was whispering sweet nothings to. It shouldn't be that stupid bitch Tasha! White-hot jealousy and rage shot through me. How dare she kiss my boyfriend! I thought furiously. She should get the fuck- I stopped in shock.

To my horror, Dimitri was kissing Tasha back. Clothes lay scattered on the floor near the bed they lay on – where I should've been, not Tasha. The way their bodies were entwining against each other, the way their lips played with each other's…and to my absolute disgust and horror, I could see Dimitri playing with the straps of her tank top. He kissed her very passionately and yanked her tank top off and tossed it away, kissing her the whole time.

I couldn't do anything. My heart felt like it was breaking into a million little fragments that would never be put together again as I watched Dimitri and Tasha. I felt cold all over, like I would never be able to feel any emotions ever again. The time my mom had told me that Tasha had asked Dimitri to become her guardian was nothing compared to this.

All the pain I'd ever felt in my life was nothing compared to this.

I couldn't open my mouth to scream, or move my legs. I knew I had to stop them, and pull Dimitri and Tasha apart, and get Dimitri back. I should at least be screaming for him. He was mine, not Tasha's.

I wasn't one to give up without a fight. If I was going to lose any battle, then I wanted to go down fighting – a physical fight, or otherwise.

Suddenly, something occurred to me, and it felt like my whole world was broken.

If Dimitri had initiated the kiss between him and Tasha…well I couldn't do anything about that. It was his choice after all. Maybe he's finally realized what he can have with her that he can't have with me, I bleakly realized as I watched them kiss. If Dimitri wants to be with Tasha, I have to let him be with her. It would kill me, but if that was what Dimitri wanted…

Tasha let out a soft sigh of contention as she moved her hands over his chest and lifted off his shirt. "Dimka," she purred, her blue eyes gazing at Dimitri.

Dimitri opened his eyes. They looked glazed over, like he wasn't really there. I frowned. Why was that look so familiar? Like he wasn't doing that of his own free will.

Dimitri's eyes focused on me, and a hint of life sparked back into his eyes. "R..Rose?"

Tasha whipped around, and I realized with anger that she was wearing a lacy black, almost see-through bra, and equally see-through panties. That fucking slut! I thought. I didn't feel as cold as I had before. Rage coursed through me all over again.

That bitch. She was throwing herself at Dimitri, probably in the hopes of getting him to kiss her (which they were already doing), and maybe sleeping together. Dimitri had a huge capacity for self-control, which I'd hoped would win out against him.

Tasha's ice blue eyes locked with mine, and there was a cold look that read Back the fuck off in them. "Forget Dimitri. Leave Russia and never come back. Don't ever think about having a relationship with him ever again! He's mine."

Her voice was as silky and inviting as last night. I almost wanted to listen to her. Dimitri…he'd never belonged to me. He was Tasha's, and I should just leave the two alone and maybe return home to St. Vladimir's. Leaving Russia and never coming back sounded pretty reasonable, a very good idea actually. More compulsion, I realized, like last night. How the hell had Tasha even learned to compel that much?

I shook it off. What Tasha didn't know was that being bonded to Lissa had given me a very high resistance to compulsion. If someone tried to compel me, I could shake it off fairly easily.

I looked her in the eye. "You can't do anything to me. I'm compulsion resistant." Not true, giving what had happened last night…whatever that had been.

From the look in Tasha's eyes she remembered that too. "Stay there, and don't speak!" she hissed at me.

I froze in place, and it felt like my jaw was glued together. I can't move! I realized with a panic. It was like last night, when she had used uncommonly strong compulsion on me.

I wasn't sure how strong Tasha really was in compulsion, but judging from the sweat on her brow, it was taking a lot of effort to maintain it. She was working a lot of compulsion just to try holding me in place.

Dimitri blinked, looking like he'd had a bucket of water thrown over him. "W-what's going on?"

Tasha immediately turned away from me. The hold of her compulsion didn't lessen. "Kiss me," she murmured, pressing herself up against him like a cat.

In my head I was screaming as they kissed very passionately. Them already getting hot and heavy was one thing, but Tasha compelling me into freezing and watching them was a whole different story.

I am punching the fuck out of that skank when I'm freed, I thought darkly to myself. We're supposed to protect Moroi, but in her case, I'll make an exception. I wanted to punch the living daylights out of her for touching my boyfriend that way.

Dimitri pulled away from the kiss, looking confused. "Tasha? What are you doing?"

"I'm doing what we always should have been," she breathed, trying to get closer to him. He pulled away.

"No, this isn't right," he said, sitting up.

A tiny bit of hope surged up in me. Was it possible… that Dimitri had been under the influence of Tasha's compulsion? He might still love me.

But still. I frowned to myself. Dimitri had promised that he wouldn't get into a situation with Tasha, and yet here they were, making out and getting hot and heavy on the bed. God knew what they'd been doing before I'd barged in on them.

"Dimka!" Tasha's voice was full of hurt as the dreamy look faded away from Dimitri's eyes. He glared at her.

"What the fuck were you doing?" If I'd been able to shiver, I would've, but I couldn't move since Tasha's compulsion was holding me in place. I had never seen Dimitri lose control, or swear. He'd once told me about how when he was thirteen, he'd snapped and beat up his Moroi father. "Did…did you compel me like last night?"

Tasha blanched. The guilty look on her face gave it away instantly without her having to speak.

"How the hell could you do that to me?" he yelled, leaning towards her. She cringed away from him, looking terrified and hurt. "How many times do I have to tell you this? I am not interested in you, Tasha!"

"But…but you once said you loved me," Tasha whispered. Sorrow and pain were all over her face. In that moment, I knew she loved him – but she was going at the wrong way to get him. In trying to compel him to confess he loved her, she had lost any hope – if she'd had any to begin with – in him returning her feelings.

Dimitri crossed his arms over his chest, a cold look coming over his face. "Compulsion is wrong and forbidden, as you well know. Why are the Moroi taught from a young age to never use it?"

"What about Vasilisa?" Tasha countered in return, throwing her hands into the air in exasperation. "That element she controls…it allows her to have much greater compulsion than me!"

"Compulsion is part of spirit, and she can't help it," Dimitri replied evenly. "You on the other hand…you are no spirit user."

Tasha flushed bright red and dropped her eyes to the bed, rubbing her shoulders as if she was cold. I acidly noted that she was trying to draw attention to the fact that she was wearing extremely skimpy lingerie. Hopefully Dimitri wouldn't fall for that. I hoped. A flashback of him pulling her tank top off passed through my mind, and I tried to shake it off.

"And just what were you trying to compel me into doing?" Dimitri asked acidly, his Russian accent becoming more pronounced than ever. "Trying to compel me into loving you for the rest of my life?"

"No, no!" Tasha protested, her eyes wide and pleading. "I wouldn't do that." The glint in her blue eyes read a whole different story.

Dimitri finally looked at me. His mouth dropped when he saw me, no doubt frozen like a statue. His voice dropped almost menacingly when he turned back to face Tasha. "What the hell have you done to Rose?"

"I-"

"Release her now!"

Tasha gulped. The hold of her compulsion dropped, and I was finally able to move again.

Dimitri's face was tight with anger. He moved, and slapped Tasha across the face.

"D-Dimka!" she cried, touching her face where he'd hit her. He hadn't hit her that hard, but she looked like he'd stabbed her. "Why…why did you do that?"

I was equally as shocked as Tasha, if not more. Dimitri would never hit a girl or a woman. For him to do something like that…he would've had to been pushed to his very last limits.

"You are not my girlfriend," he said coolly. "We can't have a future together. Especially not after tonight. Using your compulsion on me to force me to want to do things with you I previously wouldn't have wanted."

Tasha shrank back, a tear slipping down her pale cheek. The look on her face almost made me feel sorry for her. Almost, but not really. "But…I love you."

"Love isn't just kissing and making out, Tasha," Dimitri said, walking over to me so he could put his arm around me. I flinched a little at his touch. I didn't want to think about how he'd been kissing Tasha, and touching her.

He continued, "You've been trying everything in your power to try to make me fall in love with you. When that didn't work, you decided to use your compulsion on me to force me to love you. It nearly would've worked, but Rose here came in and foiled your plot."

"Is it so wrong for me to love you?" Tasha whispered, more tears streaming down her face. I wondered if it was an act, but for once, she seemed like a real person. "I have always loved you! You can't deny the feelings you once had for me."

"It's true, I once liked you," Dimitri agreed, his face hard. "But that was in the past. You were unwilling to have an open relationship with me although we eventually both agreed to not have a relationship. If you think that kiss all those years ago meant something more, you are wrong. You have been living a false delusion for the past seven years."

"Delusion? It wasn't my imagination when you kissed me," Tasha cried, putting her hands over her face.

Dimitri shook his head in disgust. There was no room for compromise. "You are a terrible person. I want you to leave my home and never come back. You are not welcome here!"

"Dimka, please! Give me a chance," she begged. It was clearly eating at her pride to have to beg him to let them have a chance at being together.

"Get out!" Dimitri's voice rang out with fury.

Tasha stood, refusing to be cowed. She tried looking straight into his eyes, no doubt to use even more compulsion.

My rage flared up within me again, and this time it was stronger than ever. The noble thing to do would be to let her go…but she'd already wrought so much damage with her compulsion. It was time to give her a little more than a black eye.

I struck out at her, aiming for her jaw.

She was too slow to react as she tried to turn to the side. My fist made contact with her jaw, and there was a slight cracking sound.

"My jaw!" she screamed, falling to the ground and touching the spot where I'd punched her.

I punched her several times, making sure to punch the eye that had a bruise from last night. The old scar on the side of her face looked a little red from me battering her.

"LEAVE MY HOUSE!" Dimitri almost bellowed at her, balling his fists.

Tasha, sobbing hysterically, pulled on her clothes and ran out of the room blindly. I heard footsteps running down the stairs and the door slamming shut below.

Silence hung in the room for several moments. I turned on Dimitri. "Why the fuck did you let her into our room? You promised me that you wouldn't get into that type of situation with her!"

"I didn't let her in!" Dimitri protested, holding his hand up in a gesture of peace. "She let herself in, and then…" He winced, obviously recalling some memory he'd rather forget. "You can guess the rest."

I scowled, crossing my arms over my chest. "No, I can't, actually."

"She walked in on me while I was reading. I was shouting at her to go away. She acted like she would listen to me…Then I made the mistake of looking into her eyes, and then I fell under her compulsion." Dimitri sighed in exasperation, and closed his eyes, shaking his head slightly. "She used her compulsion to try to seduce me and get me to sleep with her."

I was absolutely disgusted. "And…did you…" This was a very hard question for me to ask, but I had to know.

"Did I what?" Dimitri asked, raising his eyebrow at me, all business.

I gulped, trying to get the words out of my throat. They felt like acid as I spoke them. "Did you…have sex with her?"

"No, Roza," Dimitri said, looking me straight in the eye. "I did not have sex with her, or even come close. I only want to be with you."

I studied his face for a long moment. More than ever, I really wished I had Lissa's ability to see auras. Auras would tell a spirit user whether a person was lying or not. Since I was no spirit user, I had to rely on myself to tell if someone was lying to me or not.

I'd known Dimitri for less than a year. And yet…

In that short amount of time, I'd fallen in love with him. I loved him from the bottom of my heart, and he completed me. He was my soulmate, my other half.

Although I was still more than a little mad how he hadn't told me how he'd once liked Tasha…deep in my heart, I knew he was trying to keep it from hurting my feelings. I couldn't change the past. And it's not like he'd done anything with Tasha like we now did. At least I hoped so.

He hadn't lied to me, at least about that. He believed in honor and doing the right thing. It was the reason we had been hiding our relationship back at the Academy.

I finally looked up into Dimitri's warm brown eyes. He looked back at me, patient as ever.

"I believe you, Dimitri," I said at last.

A smile as warm as the sun crossed his face, and he walked over to me and held me close. "I'm so sorry, Roza," he whispered, kissing the top of my head. "So sorry I let myself fall for her lies."

I didn't say anything, just burying my head into his chest and letting him comfort me.

We sat down on the bed, and didn't say anything.

Finally I spoke. "Have you ever wondered what it would be like, to be with Tasha?"

Dimitri shook his head quickly. "Not since high school. And even when she was asking me to be her guardian…no. All I could think about was you."

I stared down at the carpet. My voice was soft and bitter when I spoke. "But have you ever considered she could give you something I couldn't?"

From the corner of my eye, I could see Dimitri looking confused. "What?"

"A family."

Pain crossed Dimitri's face. We almost never talked about this issue, knowing the inability of dhampir women to produce babies with dhampir men. I knew he loved his family, and he probably would have loved to have a family of his own. But because he was with me, he would never be able to raise a family.

I continued, although I felt very upset continuing on this particular subject. "Although we both know that Tasha is way too desperate and a possible psycho…she could have children with you. You'd be able to have children."

If there was ever one thing I would be jealous of Tasha Ozera for, this was it – her ability to be able to have children. It was the one thing I would never be able to give Dimitri, no matter how hard I tried. Jealousy laced through me as I thought of the children she would be able to give Dimitri, but I would never be able to.

It was completely silent for what felt like hours but in reality was just a few minutes. Finally, Dimitri spoke.

"It's true she could give me kids," he said slowly. "After all, that is part of what she offered me if I became her guardian – we could have an 'arrangement.' But that doesn't change the fact that she is not the woman I love. There is no point in being able to have a family if I'm not with my true love."

My heart fluttered at his words. I couldn't speak for a moment, and I almost blushed. Man, what was it about Dimitri that could make me blush so much? I forced myself back onto the topic at hand.

"Still…sometimes I'm jealous of her," I reluctantly admitted. "I'm jealous of how she could give you something you want more-"

"Hush, Roza," he said, hugging me. "I've made my choice. I won't ever be with Tasha again, considering her manipulative, crazy behavior. I would've once said she was a talented, amazing woman…but no more. It's true, we may agree with her political views, but from now on, that will be the only time we mention her."

"Well…she is Christian's aunt," I pointed out. "We do have to see her from time to time." Ugh. To think I'd once liked her.

Dimitri shrugged. "True, but not that often." He now took me by the shoulders and turned me around so we were facing each other.

"I will love only you for the rest of my life," he continued, his voice deep and sincere. "I can't imagine spending a day without you, or even just seeing you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

I was overwhelmed by his words, and hugged him, not quite sure what to say. When we pulled back, I looked up at him. "I don't want to be with anyone else except you, Dimitri. You complete me. I don't know where I'd be without you, and knowing you love me too."

At that point, Olena called up to us, telling us it was probably time to go to sleep. We were both tired from such a long day, and after getting ready, just fell asleep.

As I started to drift off into sleep, my surroundings changed. I was standing outside on the grounds of St. Vladimir's. The sky was a vivid blue, with just a few puffy clouds in the sky. The sun shone brightly and felt warm against my skin. Beautiful flowers bloomed everywhere, just like how it would be in real life.

I heard footsteps behind me, and turned, wondering who it was. When I saw who it was, my heart leapt a little.

Adrian.

Author's note: It's been a crazy week with STAR testing, so I'm kind of surprised I managed to write a chapter and get it up faster than I expected. Reviews greatly appreciated :)

Also...I'm not really sure where to go with the story from here. I think I have writer's block, because I'm running out of ideas of what to write about, but I really would like to continue writing this fanfic instead of just stopping where it is. So maybe a few plot suggestions would also be greatly appreciated, so I can get some ideas and see some plots you guys might want. Thanks :)