Chapter Eleven

Tony sat at his desk staring at the computer screen. He'd been sitting there for fifteen minutes unable to register what he was seeing, what he had to be doing, and who was around. He only knew who wasn't. The most important person to him. Ziva David. She was gone. Dead. Killed in action. It had been 3 months.

"Tony?" Abby came over to Tony's desk slowly. She looked at her friend and saw the black lines under his eyes, the bloodshot eyes, the tired lines on his face. All from lack of sleep.

Tony glanced over. It was as if he wasn't even seeing Abby. "Yes?"

"I brought you some coffee." She held up a cup of coffee. "I'm not sure how you like it so here's some cream and sugar." She set the creamer and sugar packets on the top of Tony's desk as he took the coffee.

"Thanks Abs." Tony didn't even smile. Tony DiNozzo was completely broken. Without Ziva he wasn't the old DiNozzo they all loved.

Abby walked around the desk and wrapped Tony into a tight hug. "I miss her too." She whispered. Tears began flowing down the Goth's face making her black eyeliner run down her cheeks in black lines.

Tony set his coffee down and wrapped his arms around the Goth. He held her close to him letting her cry. But he didn't cry himself. He couldn't He felt nothing.

"It's not fair." Abby whimpered into Tony's shoulder.

Tony rubbed her back gently. "It isn't."

A ding at the elevator made the two let go from the hug. Abby pulled away, grabbed some tissues and wiped the mascara and eyeliner off her glanced at the elevator.

Tony looked over and blinked a few times. Was he seeing things? Was that-

"Ziva?" McGee stood looking at the woman who was entering the squad room.

Gibbs automatically looked up. When he saw his agent he smiled and walked over.

Ziva flinched back slightly and just looked at him. "Hello Gibbs."

Gibbs noticed her flinch and stepped back. He held his arms open. "Welcome home."

Ziva looked at Gibbs' outspread arms before slowly walking into them. She hugged him as he hugged her. "It's good to be home."

Tony was staring in shock. Ziva was pale, but she was here. She had cuts on her cheek, forehead and her hands, but she was there. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail and her clothes were the regular cargo pants and tank top.

"Ziva." McGee walked to the entrance of the bull pen smiling. "Your back."

Ziva and Gibbs pulled away from their hug. She looked at McGee and nodded. "I am." She smiled slightly. To Tony it wasn't the same smile he had seen over a year ago.

"Welcome back." McGee walked over to hug her.

Ziva closed her eyes trying not to flinch as McGee held her in a hug.

Gibbs watched Ziva closely. Something was different. Was she hurt? What had happened?

"Ziva!" Abby ran over and tackled Ziva in a hug as McGee backed up. Ziva didn't flinch but instead held Abby in a tight hug to. "Abby." How she said it, it almost sounded like a sigh of relief. "I missed you."

Abby held Ziva tighter. "I missed you to. Don't leave us again."

Ziva smiled. "I won't" It still wasn't the same smile.

Tony got up and walked over to where Ziva could come to him if she wanted. "Y-Your, Your alive." He said softly.

Ziva looked at him pulling away from Abby. "Yes. I am." Ziva smiled as she saw a smile spread across Tony's lips. She missed that smile. She had imagined it so many times when she was gone. She loved the sweet charming DiNozzo smile.

"Come here." Tony held his arms out.

Ziva walked over slowly. For a moment it looked like she wouldn't accept the hug but she did. When she did it was a quick hug and she released herself from it quickly.

Tony stared at Ziva confused. "You okay?"

Ziva nodded. "Gibbs I need to talk to you." She said quickly. Then she quickly walked out, towards the break room, leaving a distance between her and each man she passed.

Gibbs watched her as he followed. This wasn't the Ziva he knew. "Ziva?" He said as they both reached the room.

Ziva walked to a corner and pressed her back into it looking at Gibbs. "I have a son." She said softly.

Gibbs looked at her confused. "What happened?"

Ziva looked down. "Things happened. I swear it wasn't my fault. I didn't want any of it to happen." Tears began falling down her face. Definitely something that wouldn't have happened before she left.

"Ziva?" Gibbs was shocked. He had never seen Ziva cry. He walked over.

Ziva flinched big time as he walked over. "Please stop." She whispered. She wouldn't look at Gibbs now. She looked at the ground wrapping her arms around herself. "Please." More tears fell out of her eyes.

Gibbs looked at her. He tried figuring out what happened. "Ziva were you raped?"

Ziva slid down the wall nodding as she cried. She curled up wrapping her arms around her knees.

Gibbs slowly began to walk over.

Ziva moved away. "Gibbs please don't."

Gibbs stopped. "Ziva I wont hurt you. Its okay." He said softly. "I'm safe."

Ziva slowly looked up to Gibbs. "Please don't let me get hurt again."

Gibbs' heart broke seeing how fragile his strongest agent now looked. He got to his knees in front of her. Gently he took her hands in his. "Ziva, I'll protect you. I won't let anyone hurt you ever again. I promise." He lifted her chin so he could look in her eyes. "I'm going to keep you safe. That's a promise." With that Ziva crawled to him slowly and let him hold her. She rested her head on his chest crying.

Gibbs rubbed her back. "What's your son's name?" He wanted to get her to relax. To be able to get her mind off of everything.

"Conner." Ziva sniffed. "Conner Chazak."

"What does that mean?" Gibbs asked gently rubbing her back.

"Strong. He's the reason I wanted to stay. It was my job over there. Conner was my strength even though I was scared. I knew if I finished I'd be sent home. I'd be safe again. Conner was the thing that kept me going."

Gibbs kissed Ziva's head. "You could've gotten us into a lot of trouble."

Ziva nodded. "I know. But I had to do my job."

Gibbs smiled and sat with Ziva curled up in his arms. "You did it Zivers. You did your job." He kissed her head and let the girl he saw as a daughter find comfort by being held by someone she trusted.

Tony stood in the doorway. He had heard everything. "Ziva. Where's your son at?"

"My neighbors. They have been helping me." She sat up and looked at her partner. "I will be fine Tony." She noticed the concern in his eyes. "The person who did it was in the explosion. He didn't survive."

Tony visibly relaxed. "Good. Cause if he was stateside, I would've hunted him down."

Ziva smiled softly. "Thank you Tony."

Gibbs got up and helped Ziva to her feet. "Do you want to bring Conner here?"

Ziva looked at Gibbs, "can someone come with me?"

"Tony will you?" Gibbs looked at his Senior Agent.

Tony looked at Ziva who looked like she wasn't too sure and scared. "I won't if your not comfortable with it."

Ziva walked over. "I will be soon. Sides you always have my six."