Ivan sat up with a sharp intake of breath, the covers pooling down around him. He threaded his large fingers through his pale blond hair, trying to calm himself down. The nightmares were always still there, but they had lessened in degree some what. He was certain they would torment him for the rest of his life. Usually, though, after he awoke from one Alfred would try to soothe him back to sleep.

Violet eyes blinked over to where the American still lay, asleep. He must have really been exhausted not to have woken up yet. Especially since he must have been tossing and turning in his nightmare...The teen looked so peaceful, his blond hair splayed out on the pillow, his eyes closed serenely and his mouth partially open to allow breaths to flow through his lungs.

Ivan wanted to kiss him, but, he refrained.

He didn't want to disturb his peace.

So, instead, the Russian merely watched as his boyfriend slept on. He didn't feel like going back to sleep and he would have to leave soon anyway. Today was a family event and he wasn't suppose to intrude. He didn't really belong here.

He wasn't sure how long he sat there watching the teen sleep. All he knew was he did so until a soft knock came at the door. Matthew's blond head peeked in, "I'm taking Gil home. Do you want a ride?" He asked quietly, mindful of his brother's sleeping form. He wondered why Ivan was up and just watching his twin but decided not to ask.

"Da." Ivan answered, standing up silently from the bed. Matthew left, closing the door behind him as Ivan fished for his clothing and his scarf. He had slept with his pants on so he only needed to locate his shirt...

After dressing himself, he turned to look back at the sleeping American. The Russian couldn't help but giggle quietly when he saw that Alfred had squirmed to the spot he had been residing in, even if it lacked covers. How cute. Ivan quickly picked up the sheets, covering the American up so he would stop his slight shivers. With that, he left the room.

Downstairs the couple was waiting for him in the mostly silent hall. Ivan quickly retrieved his coat, slipping it on easily before his eyes widened as he felt a bulge in one of its pockets. He had forgotten. How could he have forgotten?

"I forgot something. One moment." Ivan quickly muttered, hurrying back up the stairs. He ignored Gilbert's complaints about the time and whatnot, more focused on the task at hand. In fact, Ivan paid them no attention as he entered the bedroom once more. Alfred had barely moved, other than burying his head into the pillow the Russian had used. He could be so very adorable.

He pulled the gift out of his pocket, fiddling with it in his hands before setting it down on the nightstand. He stared at it a moment, then picked up a pen lying carelessly on the table hesitantly. He bent down, writing as clearly as he could, "I forget to give this yesturday. I hope you like it." on the outside of the envelope. He was always self conscious when he wrote in English, he could never spell anything correctly.

After that, he exited the room silently and stepped down the stairs. Gilbert grumbled a hurry up before he reached them. He ignored the comment (he mostly ignore the albino entirely anyway) and the three of them climbed into one of the Bonnefoy cars.

Gilbert's home was closer so he was dropped off first with few complaints or troubles. Though, the couple shared a long kiss that Ivan found annoying and Matthew found embarrassing. Still, the albino finally left them and Ivan decided to take his seat in the front. It was more comfortable to stretch his legs out there then it was in the back. It wasn't his fault he was of an admirable height.

He didn't live very far from the German family and as they neared his home Matthew flicked his violet blue gaze to him. "Ivan?" He asked quietly and with little self confidence. Ivan had always scared him, if only a little.

"Da?" The Russian answered noncommittally, looking outside at the snowy world. He couldn't wait until it all melted away. He hated the snow. He hated the cold. He wanted it all to just go away. To just leave him alone.

"I don't mind you dating Al." The shorter teen began awkwardly, flexing his grip on the wheel of the car as he drove, "I mean, he seems to really like you but.." He wavered slightly, making a turn.

"But?" Ivan questioned curiously, looking over at the timid teen.

"But..If you hurt him then...well I'm just as strong as my brother can be." Matthew hurriedly stated, not wanting to sound particularly rude but still hoping he got the message across. He could be protective too!

"Are you threatening me, Matvey?" Ivan asked, amused with a childishly creepy smirk growing on his face. It was so amusing, to think the other believed he could threaten him.

The twin reddened slightly which didn't help at all. "N-no. I'm just warning you. I don't want him hurt. And, he'll listen to me more than he'll listen to you." Matthew quickly added, hoping it would give more weight to his argument.

"Is that so? He seems to trust me very much now." Ivan continued, smirking slyly as he returned his gaze to the outside world. He was fairly comfortable that Alfred would not leave him at the drop of a hat. The fact that he had remained with him even with the knowledge of his past had cemented the idea that Alfred would not leave him suddenly.

"I'm his twin, of course he trusts me more." Matthew responded easily. Because it was true. They had a strong bond, one that no other person could match.

"He did not turn to you for help last week did he? Haven't you been lying to him as well? I'm sure since then you two have drifted apart." Ivan shrugged, smirking as he prodded the sensitive subject. Oh this was very amusing indeed.

Matthew tensed, "What's that suppose to mean?"

"It is only natural." Ivan continued, undeterred, "Soon we will be done with school and you will move out. Alfred will have his own life and so will you. Yet, if my relationship continues then Alfred and my life will remain intertwined while you move further and further away."

Matthew stared at him, "Are you trying to force Al away?"

"Nyet, I am just stating a fact of life." Ivan sighed, "Families break apart as time goes on. Parents die and siblings leave each other." It was true, he knew from experience.

Matthew didn't know what to say, only thankful that he had reached the Russian's home so he could get him out of his car. That wasn't true. Alfred and him had always been close. They wouldn't just drift apart. They wouldn't leave each other. They we're going to stay close forever. And Papa and Dad weren't old, they wouldn't just die. Well, everyone died eventually but they were still young. Right?

Right?

Oh God what if Papa and Dad died and Alfred left so that he was all alone?

Matthew found himself speeding back home.

Alfred woke up with a yawn, glancing at the clock tiredly. 9:02 am. He could still catch a few snoozes. It wasn't like he had any plans for the day. Christmas was the day that everyone staid home to spend time together so he wasn't even allow-

It was Christmas.

And he was still in bed.

He tore the blankets off of himself and stood up quickly, only then realizing his boyfriend was missing. He was sleeping next to him before, right? Oh, he must have left already. Alfred made a little twirl to confirm the fact only to spot a wrapped up box on his bedside table. He paused, slightly confused at its sudden appearance.

He picked up the gift, detaching the envelope and reading the message on the outside. It was from Ivan. (He really did need to work on his writing) The American opened the card, "I thought we could match." He blinked, tearing the wrapping paper off and opening the box.

"Ivan...you didn't have too." He whispered to himself, slipping the soft creamy white scarf out of the box. At its tail end sported the American flag on one side and the letters "USA" on the other. "Shit...I didn't get you anything...I didn't get anyone anything." Alfred mumbled, feeling horrible and pathetic. He didn't deserve this gift. He had plenty of time to buy his family something. Hell, the though of giving Ivan a gift had never even crossed his mind. Was he really that self-centered?

He wrapped the scarf around his neck loosely, it was the least he could do. With that, he ventured out of his room and down the stairs. His parents were already up, which was rare, since he could see them sitting on the couch in the family room.

He hadn't been noticed yet, and he watched as his parents were arguing quietly about something or another. He could tell by the way his English father's face grimaced as he spoke. It was most likely about their current position on said couch. Francis had his feet up on the sofa with his back leaning against the arm rest. Arthur was lying down snuggly on top of him, his head leaning against the others shoulder. A french arm around an English waist secured him down, keeping him from getting out of his position.

Seeing them together, so peaceful (even though they were bickering), especially after reliving the old neighborhood the previous nigh, he couldn't help but suddenly feel so happy. His parents had been miserable in that place, and they had been there for a much much longer time. And yet, they had persevered.

Alfred loved them so much, he really did.

That was why he quickly stumbled into the room and flung himself onto the couch.

"Alfred! What the bloody hell!" Arthur yelled, grimacing as Alfred hugged him and his husband. His little boy, in truth, weighed quite a lot. Having him lying on top of them was hurting him considerably.

"I love you guys so much." The younger blurted out, suddenly. Two pairs of adult eyes blinked at him in shock. Alfred merely continued to hug them, oblivious to his father's discomfort.

"And we love you too, cher!" Francis smiled, wrapping his arms around to hug his son, effectively sandwiching Arthur in between them. Alfred laughed lightly at the embrace, grinning brightly.

"Is there something wrong?" Arthur asked, wondering what had prompted the sudden confession. He'd rather ignore the fact that he was being squeezed until he could barely breathe, more concerned about his son.

"Nope. Just thought I'd remind you that you're the best Dad in the world." Alfred easily responded, smiling up at his father. .

"Alfred, no need to kiss up. Your gifts are already right there." Arthur brushed off, feeling his ears burn at the compliment. It was probably just a joke anyway. It usually was.

"But I'm serious! You are!" Alfred insisted and Arthur merely rolled his eyes. So, the boy pressed,"You're always there for us, and you teach us stuff, and you used to tell us the best stories, and you always protect us and you adopted us!" He listed, making the Brit flush more with each remark.

"Alright, Alright." Arthur quickly said, unable to keep the smile from tainting lips as he ruffled the boys hair. "Now hush up and get up before you crush me."

Alfred laughed again, getting up and stretching his arms and legs. They were still tired from sleeping and needed a good stretching before they could function properly.

"And moi? Am I nothing?" Francis lamented melodramatically from his place, pouting up at his son playfully. Why had Arthur gotten such a touchy moment and not him? It was so cruel!

Alfred laughed harder, "Papa, you're the best Papa in the world. It's a whole other category." The American teen assured quickly, turning toward the pile of gifts. "When can we open them?" He was getting impatient, his fingers itching to rip of the decorative paper surrounding his presents.

"When Matthieu gets home." Francis replied, nuzzling into his husband's choppy blond locks lovingly. He needed to make breakfast soon, and then perhaps start preparing for dinner...

"Where did you get that scarf, Alfred? I don't recall buying it for you..." Arthur piped up, noticing the garment for the first time. He didn't know why hadn't noticed it before since it seemed so out of place. Alfred was wearing loose sweatpants with a T-Shirt, hardly an outfit that would normally be accompanied by a scarf.

Alfred blinked, tugging at the garment self consciously, "Oh, Ivan gave it to me for Christmas." He answered, a small smile teasing his lips as he looked down at the ground.

"How sweet." Francis responded, sending his husband a warning look. Arthur merely huffed but remained obediently silent on the subject. He didn't want to get into a fight. Especially today.

"That reminds me..."The American looked down at his feet, biting at his lower lip, "I..I didn't get you guys anything because of all that happened." He mumbled before lifting his head up quickly. He felt terrible. They always exchanged gifts, it was tradition! And he'd ruined it. "But don't worry! I'll get you something ASAP!" He quickly assured. The guilt was just too much.

"Alfred, you don't need to get us anything. We are just happy that you are home." Francis quieted with a wave of his hand. That's all that really mattered anyway.

"Mattie said the same thing..." Alfred muttered, still feeling guilty no matter what.

"What did I say that was the same?" Matthew asked, entering the room and making everyone jump.

"Holy! Mattie how long have you been here?" Alfred asked in shock. He hated when his brother did that, just kinda popped out of no where. It was scary as hell.

"Only a minute, I pulled in like five minutes ago." His brother answered with a shrug, plopping himself down on the floor tiredly. His mind was still occupied with dissecting Ivan's chilling words. They couldn't be true. They just couldn't be.

Alfred sat down beside him, eyeing the colorfully wrapped gifts, "Now can we start?"

Arthur let out a light chuckle, "Yes go on, before you explode." He conceded, sitting up slightly as Francis loosened his grip.

"I can't wait to play this!" Alfred shouted out, finally finishing unwrapping all of his gifts. He'd gotten so many video games he just couldn't wait!

"I shall go start breakfast." Francis decided, standing up and exiting the room. He could have started earlier, but the best part of the holiday was seeing his boy's faces light up with every gift opened. He couldn't miss that.

"Wait for me, frog." Arthur glowered, standing up as well and stretching slightly. "Ng, I'm getting too old for this." He muttered too himself as he left the room to follow after his husband.

Matthew bit at his lip, watching his parents leave. Old? They weren't old. Were they? What if...

"Mattie? Somethin' wrong?" Alfred asked, only flicking his gaze at his brother as he read the back of one of the video games he had just gotten. It looked kick ass.

"Al...When we grow up and move out...We're still going to see each other...right?" Matthew mumbled, his voice wavering slightly.

Alfred looked up, tilting his head. "Of course we will." What a stupid question. It was a total no brainer.

"No I mean...We're not going to be like those families who drift apart until they only exchange one phone call twice a year?" Matthew continued, feeling his worry growing with each word he spoke. He didn't want to be like that.

"What? No! Where would you get that idea?" Alfred asked, putting his video game down to actually look at his brother.

"Nowhere..." Matthew quickly lied, averting his gaze to the floor and stared at his bent knees.

Alfred crawled over, "Mattie, you're my twin brother. I'm not going to leave you. No hero would ever leave his sidekick." He assured, putting a hand on his should for good measure.

Matthew looked at him humorlessly, "And what if the leading lady told him too?"

Alfred scrunched his eyebrows together in confusion, "Huh?" What was that suppose to mean?

"Never mind." The younger sighed, shrugging off the hand on his shoulder.

"Mattie, when we go to college you're going to go to a super amazing school and I'm going to go to the cheapest one that's nearby. And we're going to hang out every weekend. And then, when we graduate we're going to live in some apartment together until we get awesome jobs. Then we're gonna move into neighboring houses and have separate families and be each others kids' awesome uncles. I've figured it all out." Alfred explained seriously, knocking each fact of on his fingers.

Matthew smiled, feeling a little relieved by his brother's words, "I'd like that, Al." Still, he was unsure about it all and he really did fear for their futu-

"Arthur! Non! Don't touch the ham!"

"I was just making sure it was seasoned right!"

"Careful! Mon Dieu get your hip away from the oven dial!"
"What?"

There was some shuffling, some shoving and a cry.

And suddenly the familiar beep of the fire alarm.

"Bête sauvage! Regard qu'est ce que tu a fais! Maintenant je dois recommencer le diner!" (Savage beast! [it's an insult, my mom uses it a lot] Look what you've done! Now I have to restart the dinner preparations!)

"Sorry! I was only trying to help!"

"Get out of the kitchen! That's the only way you can help!"

Arthur huffed, stomping out of the smoky area and crossing his arms. He'd only been trying to help. Francis seemed slightly stressed from all the cooking he'd done in the past 24 hours and he thought that perhaps he could aid him. Obviously the frog didn't deserve his help.

"Mattie. Mattie whats wrong?" Alfred asked worriedly as his brother looked so gloomy all of a sudden. Almost as if he was going to cry. And if there was one thing Alfred couldn't take, it was when his twin cried.

The other shook his head, biting his lip.

Arthur came over, alarmed, "Matthew? You're not upset because we fought are you? It's normal!" He assured quickly. It was all the Frenchman's fault! "Francis! You made Matthew upset!"

"I made Matthew upset? You ruined our dinner! That is probably why he is upset!" Francis snapped, moving from his kitchen looking frazzled and frustrated. Still, at the words that his precious Matthieu was upset he had to abandon his post to make sure he was all right.

"I-It's not that!" Matthew assured.

"What's wrong then?" Alfred pressed, frowning

"J-Just...I don't want to leave. I want to stay like this. With Papa and Dad fighting and Alfred being annoying. I don't want to leave and have us drift apart to the point where we never see each other! And I don't want you to die!" He blurted out, reddening slightly at how childish and stupid he sounded.

The trio blinked at each other before they erupted into a chorus of voices all speaking at the same time.

"Matthieu, where ever did you get such an idea?"
"Die? Matthew we're far from death I assure you! We aren't that old!"

"Mattie! I told you before we'll always be side by side!"

"That's it, I'll make pancakes for breakfast."

"I'll play Portal co-op with you instead of L.A. Noire!"

"I'll finally mend the hole in your favorite hockey sweatshirt."

Matthew couldn't help but laugh at the sudden outburst. They really did always know how to turn his mood around. He loved his family so much.

"Ivan?"

The Russian teenager lifted his head and looked up at his guardian, "Da?" He had returned home quite some time ago. Ever since his conversation with the youngest Bonnefoy, he was plagued with thoughts of his sisters. Thoughts of his past. Images of his deeds. It wouldn't stop.

He wanted Alfred.

"Erm...I heard that you liked to ice skate...so umm M-Merry Christmas." The man stammered, holding out a neatly wrapped gift. He hoped what she had said was true...

"Oh. Thank you." Ivan took the gift, unwrapping it to find a pair of sleek new ice skates. He peered at them for a moment before turning to Toris skeptically, "How did you know I liked to ice skate?" He didn't recall ever mentioning it to him. He didn't normally speak to the timid man, ever.

The brunette paled lightly at the intense look, "Well, er I am sure I heard it somewhere! And well, there's an ice rink not too far away...so I thought..." Toris continued to stammer, fidgeting as he was put on the spot.

"Did Alfred tell you?" Ivan asked, because really he was the only one who knew as far as he was concerned. He had only ever mentioned his ice skating interests during their first date those few weeks ago...

"Ah? Er yes! I guess it was him. Yes, that's right he told me during his stay here." Toris breathed a sigh of relief a he was saved by some merciful grace from above.

Ivan didn't entirely believe him but nodded anyway. He would much rather be alone than interrogating the Lithuanian. He was tired, he was bored, he was lonely. And the brunette only made him feel lonelier. He wished he could have stayed with Alfred at his home. At least he had his birthday to look forward too.

Alfred rang the doorbell, fidgeting on the doorstep because it was way too fucking cold to be outside and what was taking Ivan so long to open the damn do-

"Alfred."

"Hey!" Alfred greeting, pushing himself in through the doorway and into the cozy home. Finally, warmth.

"Alfred." Ivan repeated, a smirk adorning his features as he tugged on the scarf around his boyfriend's neck, "You are wearing the scarf."

Alfred blinked, turning his eyes down and reddening slightly. "Oh..Uh yeah, thanks." He mumbled awkwardly, only slightly creeped out by the growing smile on the others face. It sent shivers down his spine. He wasn't entirely sure if they were pleasant or not...

"You like it?" Ivan continued, looking at him expectantly.

"Huh? Y-yeah! I like it. I wouldn't be wearing it otherwise..." Alfred answered sheepishly, before letting out a manly squeak of surprise as he was suddenly lifted from the ground. Ivan held him tightly, looking up into his surprised face.

"I am so glad." The Russian stated before pressing those slightly parted lips into a kiss. Alfred regained his thoughts, kissing back easily though unable to use his arms. He wanted to loop them around the other teen's neck but it was impossible with them being trapped by Ivan's own arms.

"Yeah yeah, now let me down!" Alfred said breathlessly when they parted and Ivan acquiesced with a light giggle. He set the American down on the ground, carefully.

"You are so very cute Alfred." Ivan commented, kissing him once more. It was just so addicting.

"I am not cute." Alfred grumbled, "Now, are we going to do something or you just going to kiss me all day?"
"I'd much prefer the latter." Ivan decided, tugging him even closer.

"Oh. Alfred!"

The American quickly pulled away from the embrace, blushing brightly as he saw Toris peeking his head into the hallway. "T-Tor?" How long had he been there?

"You must be here for Ivan's birthday!" Toris exclaimed happily, glad his ward had actually decided to do something.

Though, he paled when he was met with silence from the normally very talkative blond. Alfred tilted his head, his eyebrows drawing closer together. Birthday? Ivan's birthday? Today? Today was Ivan's birthday?

"It's your birthday?" Alfred asked, turning his gaze toward Ivan.

"Da." Ivan answered easily.

"...Why didn't you tell me?"

"It did not seem important." Ivan replied and was met with a stare. Had he said something wrong?

"Not important? Dude! You're birthday is super important! You have to have a party, cake and presents! It's the day the world celebrates you! Of course it's important!" Alfred cried, looking at the taller in disbelief.

"Nyet, I don't find any of that interesting." Ivan brushed off, running a finger through the American's hair, flicking his cowlick playfully. He couldn't help it, he needed to touch him, if only a little.

"You never find anything interesting!" Alfred huffed in frustration. Why was his boyfriend so weird? So creepy? He slapped the hand away from his hair, it felt weird.

"That is not true. I find you very interesting." Ivan replied, smile growing.

Alfred blushed crossing his arms, before letting them drop. What was he doing? He was criticizing him again... "Shit..." He was the worst boyfriend ever.

"What is wrong?" Ivan asked, alarmed at the sudden mood change. Had he done something wrong? Was Alfred going to ignore his existence for a week like in previous instances?

"I... You let me stay at your house for a week and you got me a Christmas present. I haven't done anything! I didn't get you a gift, not for Christmas nor for your birthday! I didn't even know it was your birthday!"

"It is ok." Ivan assured. It didn't bother him, as long as Alfred was happy and stayed with him. As long as he wasn't lonely.

"No. It's not. Wait, do you know when my birthday is?"

"July 4th." Ivan answered instantly.
"Shit! How do you know?" Now he felt even worse!

"You told me."

Alfred made a noise of frustration. Did he know anything about Ivan? Was he that self-centered? He was so stupid! All this time he was always criticizing Ivan for being weird or creepy. In reality he himself was the one being the horrible boyfriend! Shit.

"I... What do you want for Christmas and your birthday? Just tell me and I'll get it! Anything." He quickly stated, if only to stop the guilt that flowed through his stomach.

Ivan stared at him, "Anything?"

"Yes, anything. I feel terrible!"

Ivan grabbed his hand, dragging him up the stairs without a word. Alfred was about to protest when he was pushed into the Russian's room, falling down onto the bed. He attempted to sit up but Ivan climbed up over him. Blue eyes widened and he immediately tensed.

"Woah! No sex!" Alfred quickly said, backing up nervously. He didn't mean anything anything!

"You did say anything." Ivan pointed out, "But that was not what I wanted. Well, not entirely." He quickly continued, seeing the panic suddenly appear in the others beautiful blue eyes.

Alfred hesitated, "Well? What did you want, then?"

"I want to see you naked."

"Wh-what?" Alfred asked, blushing oh so darkly as those violet eyes practically bored into him. He hadn't expected that, that was for sure.

"I want to see you. All of you. Naked before me with only the scarf I gave you around your neck." Ivan clarified, keeping his gaze steady on the teen beneath him.

Alfred took in a sharp breath, suddenly feeling very hot at the way Ivan spoke his wish. He was so serious, so earnest yet so childishly demanding. And those violet eyes. Those damn violet eyes held his gaze, pressing him to agree until all he could muster out was a stuttered, "F-Fine."

And those damn violet eyes lit up.

I'm such a tease. Lol

Guys, I'm sorry this is two hours late...But its up so yay!
Next Chapter: Well, we pick up where we left off~ hon hon hon

I'm super tired right now since its almost 3 am... Night guys!
And review with love!