Santana's been pretty much emotionally unstable all day. First, the fight with Finn; it took her a lot longer than it should have for her to see what a mistake she made.
She had to lock herself in the bathroom, turn on the shower and cry for a little bit. She loves him so much and she just let one little thing get to her and it caused them to say a bunch of shit they didn't mean. At least, she hopes he didn't mean what he said.
Second, Nick had been on and off crying all day and it broke her heart to see it. He was still trying to be a good boy for her and pretend it was nothing. But she could hear him sniffling as him and the twins played hide and go seek. She saw his red eyes and the little puffs from crying. It killed her.
And thirdly, she was pissed that Rachel still hadn't told her why her and Puck had been fighting. She wants to know. She has to know. This is their fault anyways. If they weren't fighting, Santana wouldn't have felt so damn angsty and wouldn't have fought Finn.
"I told you I'll tell you later tonight," Rachel says as they're getting dinner prepared for themselves and the three boys, "Just calm down, Santana."
Santana hates being told to calm down, but she did it anyways, not wanting to rush her.
Once dinner was ready, they all sat together to eat. Rachel, Jack and Danny just went right into eating. Nick didn't. He sat in his seat, looking from the door and turning every so often to glare at Rachel. Santana knew what he was doing.
He was hoping Finn would come through the door, part of her was hoping for it too. She also knew he was glaring at Rachel since she was sitting in Finn's seat. Santana was tempted to make her move but she stayed quiet and chewed on the carrots Rachel was forcing them all to eat.
After they were bathed, Santana went to tuck Nick in.
"Mommy…" He says as she's turning his lights off.
"Yes?"
"Why are you mad at daddy? Was it because of the haircut?"
Santana sighs a little, "At first, yes. But then it got more complicated."
Nick frowns, "I asked to look like Uncle Noah, mommy. It wasn't daddy's fault."
Santana gives him and sad smile, "And it's not your fault either, Nick."
She gives him a kiss on his forehead and begins to leave again, "Mommy…"
"Yes, Nick?"
"I miss daddy."
"I know, baby. Now get some sleep."
He sniffles a little and gives a small nod, pulling his dinosaur blanket up higher on his body and then turning onto his side.
Santana goes into her room, tired from the day. Rachel's sitting on the edge of the bed when she gets in there.
"You gonna tell me now?"
Rachel nods. Santana sighs heavily and climbs into the bed. They both relax on the pillows and Santana rubs her stomach. "It's just that…" She bites her bottom lip. "Puck wants another baby."
"You're mad because your husband wants to make a child with you?" She snaps a little. "Are you fucking kidding me?!"
"He wants me to give up my acting career!"
"Finn told me you haven't even auditioned for a play two years before you got your ass knocked up! Your little career is over, Rachel."
Rachel's eyes tear up a little, "It's my dream, Santana. I refuse to give up on it."
Santana sighs, "What if you like…make a deal. If you don't audition or get a role in a play or whatever in the next two or three years, then you guys try for another. And after it's born, you still don't have to give up."
Rachel just shakes her head, "He cheated on me." She whispers.
"What?" Santana snaps, totally ready to find Puck and kick his ass.
"We were fighting about it and I told him the only way he'll ever get another child is if he got another girl pregnant. He got mad and hooked up with some girl he met. He came home and told me about it right away."
"What an ass."
"No! He's not; I mean…it was a bad thing. But he was crying and he was begging me to forgive him and I said I did." She sobs loudly and wipes at her face. "I just…I don't think I do. I know I told him to but I didn't mean it. That's why we came. I thought we needed a vacation to take our minds off of things."
Santana sighs and wraps her arms around Rachel. She lets the girl cry on her shoulder for a while. She gets her to calm down eventually and they cuddle up together to go to sleep. Santana has trouble falling asleep though. She's not comfortable with Rachel like she is with Finn.
The next day, they take the kids to an arcade. Santana wants Nick to be happy and he seems alright while they're running around. But every once in a while he'll look over at her and pout which she knows is his way of telling her to call Finn. But no, she's not going to cave first. No matter how badly she wants to.
She makes Rachel sleep in the soon to be nursery that night because she can't sleep in the same bed with that girl again. She's all cold and moves too much. She wants her soft, warm Finn to hold her in his arms.
She tosses and turns all night long, getting up a few times to eat or watch TV in the living room. She's going crazy in the room by herself and Rachel knows it. She's come out to check on her a few times, hearing her moving around the house and whatnot.
She offers to lay in bed with Santana until she falls asleep but Santana tells her it won't be the same and just to go lay down in her own bed.
She wakes up somewhere around 3 AM for like the fifth time, just wanting to cry when she hears some shuffling. She panics for a second until she realizes it's Finn, coming home to her. He doesn't say anything when their eyes lock onto each other's. He just gets into the bed and does exactly what she wants.
"What are you doing here?" She whispers.
He rubs her back gently and looks down at her. "I couldn't sleep." He tells her. "And Rachel told me you were in pain."
"She lied."
"Did she?"
Santana bites her bottom lip, "So, you came back because Rachel told you I was hurting and because you can't sleep?"
"No." He whispers, kissing her temple. "I came back because I love you and I'm never going to leave you. No matter how much we fight."
"Good," She says, smiling a little, "And I love you too." She whispers, closing her eyes.
She falls asleep and stays asleep. When she wakes up the next morning, Finn is holding her from behind, his large hand resting on the bottom of her stomach. Nick is on her other side and his little hand is resting on her stomach like Finn's.
Santana wishes so badly that she can get up and take a picture of how cute they all probably look but she can't because it'll mess it up. She also doesn't want to shout to Rachel even though she can hear the girl in the living room watching The View. She reaches behind her since she realizes Finn is still in her jeans.
She starts to feel around in his pockets carefully until she feels his phone. She eases it out and slowly scrolls through his contacts until she sees 'Rachel's Cell' listed and clicks call.
"Finn?" She hears both through the phone and through the walls.
"Shush," Santana says quietly. "Come into my room, get my camera off of my dresser and take a picture of me and the boys." She hangs up.
After only a minute, Rachel's in the room, directing her on how the picture should look.
"Santana, I really think it would look cuter if you were to pretend to be asleep."
"Shut up and take the freaking picture, Berry."
"You guys are so weird," Finn groans, laughing lightly and kissing Santana's shoulder.
"Good job, Rachel. You woke Finn up."
…
It's been a while since Rachel and Puck came to visit and all the fighting happened. Finn's been even more of the whole Super Dad to Nick and has been doing everything he can to make Santana happy. He reminds her daily of how happy he is that he gets to be with her. She knows he still feels bad about his comment. She's forgiven him because she's totally sure that he didn't mean it.
She e-mails Rachel to make sure her and Puck are doing alright. They're going to marriage counseling. She's also talked to Puck a few times about the matter, once when he left, the other times over the phone. She knows Puck well enough to know when he's bullshitting her and she can tell that when it comes to how sorry he is, he's being serious. The boy doesn't just cry for shits and giggles.
She's only got a week left before the baby is due and her body is basically shutting down on her. None of her clothes fit her, she's wearing these huge dresses and she hates it. Her shoes also don't fit anymore. She feels like a hobo walking around in maxi dresses and flip flops. Finn enjoys how much larger her breasts are though.
He doesn't have to say it, she can tell by how his eyes automatically go to her chest before going anywhere else on her body. She likes that her boobs are a nice size too but at the same time they hurt too much for her to really enjoy them.
"Breast feeding is gonna be a bitch," She says randomly while they're watching TV one night.
"What?" He looks at her like she's crazy.
"I'm pretty sure we've had this conversation before, Finn."
His eyes are on her chest, of course. "Yea but…I thought you said it hurt so much last time that you want to do formula for this one?"
She scrunches up her nose at the thought, "Hell no."
"But I bought like a crap ton of formula because you said—"
"Are you questioning my motherly instincts?" That's kind of her thing now. Whenever Finn disagrees on her about something when it comes to the baby, she uses that against him. Like when they were picking up diapers and he wanted to get some off brand because it was cheaper and she didn't like that and thought the baby should get the nice, fancy ones. "Please, if you think you can do this better, you can carry the baby for the last week."
He holds his hands up in defeat.
She always wins.
Three days left before the expected date of birth, Santana's standing in the kitchen, trying to get a glass of water. Finn usually does all this crap for her and she doesn't stop him but he's putting the finishing touches on the nursery so she rather not bother him at the moment.
Suddenly she feels something wet rushing down her legs and then a sharp pain to her stomach, causing her to drop the cup, glass shattering against the tile floor. Nick runs in from his bedroom, his eyes wide and then he starts to scream that mommy's dying.
Finn runs into the kitchen and just panics, not sure if he should help her, pick up the glass, get Nick out of the room since he's freaking out and crying or mop up the floor.
"Get the overnight bag," She says, holding her stomach. "Nick, stop crying. Mommy's ok." She slowly moves toward the door, gripping the counter top. "Call Steve," She tells Finn, or maybe Nick.
Finn starts to do what she says, calling Steve as he goes to get her overnight bag. He comes back and scoops Nick up, tossing him over his shoulder, running out to the car. A few minutes later, he's running back inside, carefully picking Santana up and taking her to the car.
They make it to the hospital in time, Santana's taken to a room, Steve is already there to watch Nick so that Finn can go with her. She's a lot closer than they had thought she would be and immediately they have her legs up and the doctor is there, trying to help her push.
"What? No! I haven't had the shot yet!" She shouts, pain surging through her body.
"We're too late for that, Ms. Lopez."
She thinks she might cry.
Ten hours, numerous threats and insults aimed to Finn and one crying baby in her arms later, she's holding her daughter, Sofia. She's small and pink and has a full head of hair already. Santana's crying, so is Finn. They get to hold her and look at her for a while before the nurses take her away to completely clean her up.
She's gets cleaned up herself while Finn goes to check on Nick. Once everything is nice and pretty, they let both her boys in to come visit her and the new baby. Nick's amazed when he sees his sister but is too afraid to touch her yet.
"You're a big brother now," Santana whispers to him, kissing his head. Nick smiles at her and then to his sister.
Santana doesn't ever want to let her little girl go but eventually the nurses come back and takes her away. Nick and Finn are also sent home and she's left alone in the hospital room. This was always her least favorite part of giving birth.
When she finally gets to see the room for the first time, she cries. It's a soft pink that's not overbearing or anything like most baby pink colors. Finn got all this white washed furniture set up and he apparently decided that butterflies would be her theme. She has toys set up and clothes all washed and set up already. He's even nicely painted 'Sofia' over her crib in a light purple color.
She loves it and loves him for going through the trouble of doing this all. He even shows her this baby book he had already been working on. One that charts the baby's life before it was even more. And he's already filled in a bunch of stuff from ultrasound pictures and things that "mommy craved while pregnant."
It's adorable to say the least.
…
"But I don't want to go," Santana says as Finn's holding Sofia, rocking her slowly in the rocking chair he bought for them to use.
"San, your mom sounded pretty freaked. You need to go."
"But…"
"Don't worry. You'll only be gone for a few days; we have your…you know…"
"Breast milk…"
"That…stored and you showed me how to heat it up and test it first. I got this, babe. Just…go."
It's been four months and Santana hasn't left her daughter once. She does the books for the restaurant at home and she'll stop in to see how things are but she never leaves Sofia with just Finn. And it's not because she doesn't trust him. She knows he's good (she made him take a bunch of classes). She just doesn't want to leave her baby. She was the same way with Nick.
But her dad got hurt or something and her mom wants her there because she thinks it's really serious. She's of course freaked out too and hopes to God her dad is alright but she hates leaving her family. But she does.
And she hates that she does since her mom totally went overboard and her dad just got into a little car accident (not his fault) and broke his arm. He's perfectly fine other than that. She's happy he's ok but she's pissed that she flew to the other side of the states for this.
The trip isn't totally wasted though since it gives her a chance to show off pictures to every one of her new baby. And her parents throw a little baby shower type thing. She's showered with all kinds of things that she does not need but what the hell, why not?
Sofia has more clothes than her and Finn combined by the time she gets back to Florida. He teases her because she had to buy a new suitcase just to carry all the crap home.
"Whatever, where is my baby?" She asks him once he's done teasing.
"Oh…um…"
"I don't like that…"
"Look, she's in the room but before you freak out…"
She doesn't hear anything else after that. She just runs to the nursery to make sure Sofia isn't damaged or missing a limb or something. But when she gets in there, she stops short. There are flowers sitting on all the dresses and Nick is standing in the room, grinning widely.
He's wearing a shirt that says, "Will you…" on it. Santana eyes him a little suspiciously and then looks at Sofia in the crib with a onesie on that says, "Marry me?" She turns around and sees Finn at the entrance of the baby's room, down on one knee, holding a ring out to her.
"You're a jerk," She says, hitting his arm.
"What did I do?"
"You made me think something was wrong!"
He laughs and stands up, pressing a kiss to her lips. "I love you."
"I love you too…"
"So…?"
"The fact that you have to ask proves how dumb you can be at times," She teases, holding her hand out to him. "And the fact that it took you this long just proves it even more."
He laughs and slides the ring onto her finger. Nick cheers in the background and Sofia just giggles, not even knowing what's going on.