This happiness thing was turning out to be alot harder than he'd anticipated, though in retrospect, it had never in his whole life been very easy to be happy. But this, watching her get on a shuttle with Thane, go on missions with Thane, it was harrowing. Garrus was feeling his control stretching a little thinner every time he saw them together.
They seemed easy in each other's company, she often visited the drell in life support. Garrus tried to not notice, but his C-Sec training made him want to notice everything. Lately, Shepard had been going planetside in the Hammerhead with Thane, a lot. While Garrus was exceedingly glad not to be subjected to that, he was envious of the time the assassin got to spend with her. And when he watched them leave, he was unsettled to see a sniper rifle on Thane's back.
So, I've been replaced, he thought, guts feeling hollow, hands hurting as he clenched them. It was overwhelming, the deadness in him. And the need, the horrible need was clawing at him again. He knew where he could find something to assuage it, knew Kasumi would give it to him if he asked. Did he dare, though? Crawling into the bottom of a bottle never seemed to be more appealing. But could he stand to see the disappointment on Shepard's face, to let her down yet again?
On his way to Kasumi's room, he saw Grunt pacing in the galley, clearly agitated about something. Fighting the siren song of the brandy, he turned away to see what was the matter.
He leaned against the wall near the tables and watched the krogan go back and forth. Everyone else seemed to have vacated the area, even the everpresent Mess Sergeant Gardner, probably fearing violence. "Grunt, you're gonna wear a hole in the decking if you keep doing that."
"Where's Shepard? I need to talk to her."
You and me both, pal. Garrus scratched his chin, "She's planetside with our little green friend."
With a growl of frustration, Grunt swept everything off the top of the kitchen counters.
Garrus let him thrash about for a good minute before saying sardonically, "That's a bit...dramatic, don't you think?"
"Are you provoking me, turian? Wouldn't want Shepard to come back to find her pet sniper disemboweled." Grunt glowered angrily at Garrus, hands balling into fists.
"Are you looking for a fight, Grunt? We could take this downstairs, you know...if you've got the quad." Garrus watched the krogan fume out of the corner of his eye, examining his talons disinterestedly. He was ready to move if the krogan decided to charge him then and there, but he wasn't looking forward to explaining to Shepard why her galley was in such a state of disarray, well, more than it was now. With a jerk of his head, Grunt stalked down the corridors to the lift, punching the button with excessive force. Garrus sauntered after him, swaggering a bit more than usual.
This was starting to look better and better. Throw some punches, relieve some stress and calm this adolescent krogan down at the same time. Garrus almost grinned at the thought, feeling that familiar pre-battle buzz. He bounced a little in place and looked over at Grunt. The krogan seemed a little out of it, but Garrus didn't miss the gleam in his eye as well. Whatever ailed him seemed to fill him with a pent up energy, making him almost shake, trying to keep it bottled up.
They wasted no time once they got to the mat, Grunt charging Garrus in an effort to barrel him to the ground. Laughing, the turian let him come, deflecting Grunt's forward momentum at the last minute so he went stumbling. Garrus countered with a waist high kick, knee snapping into Grunt's ribs. "What, no warm ups?"
"Who needs warm ups?" Grunt roared as he charged Garrus again. Garrus shook his head at the blind attack, thinking maybe he was wrong about this krogan being intelligent. He moved to deflect again and Grunt surprised him by turning his charge into a spin, catching the turian a punch to the chest. Mmmmm, things are looking up, Garrus thought, a savage sort of happiness filling him at the thought that he wouldn't have to hold back too much. He blocked a flurry of punches meant for his face and dropped back on his heel, executing a backward spinning kick that exploded against the side of Grunt's head, rocking the krogan to the side, almost felling him.
Grunt recovered fast, faster than Garrus thought he would and lunged out to grapple Garrus waist, trying to lift him up and drop him to the mat. The krogan hadn't taken Garrus' greater height into consideration and the turian reversed it, pushing mightily and breaking Grunt's hold with a twist. Grunt landed flat on his back with Garrus on top, his knees in the krogan's shoulders. A couple of elbow shots to the face and Grunt was a little dazed. Garrus threw his fists in the air, yelling, "Yes, I am KING OF THIS MOUNTAIN!"
Garrus rolled away from a kidney punch, turning its force into a glancing blow. He bounced back up to his feet, squaring up with Grunt again. He brought his knees to his chest to stretch out his hamstrings as the krogan eyed him warily, rumbling, "I'm starting to see why Shepard keeps you around."
"Yeah, my startling good looks, I know. C'mon, big boy, let's dance." Oh, this was fun. Just what he needed to forget, better than drink. His turn to take the initiative, he moved in, sweeping from side to side to keep Grunt off balance as he searched for openings in the krogan's defenses. The boy was learning, and quickly, blocking strikes more and more often, even dealing a few of his own that stung. Garrus was sure he was grinning like a fool by now, his mandibles aching a little from the strain of it. The krogan was smirking too, clearly enjoying this 'friendly' match.
Let him enjoy this! Garrus thought with glee as he leapt straight up, his knee cracking into Grunt's chin, snapping his head back, felling him like a tree. As he hit the mat with a resounding thud, a cheer went up around him. Startled, Garrus looked around. They had drawn an audience, almost every crewmember was down here watching them fight. And Shepard was back, he felt quite a bit of chagrin when he realized he hadn't even heard the Hammerhead re-enter the cargo bay. He reached down to help Grunt back to his feet as crewmembers came up to him and started congratulating him, he ducked his head at their praise.
"Well, if that's what you meant by sparring, I think I'll pass." said Kelly laughingly, patting him on the shoulder.
His spirits were high so he couldn't help teasing, "Aw, c'mon, Chambers, even if I said I'd take it easy on you?"
"Maybe I don't want easy." Her grin turned lascivious and the whole crowd crowed laughter. Garrus turned away gratefully at a tap on his shoulder. Thane was looking at him with a smile on his face, that damnable sniper rifle still on his back. Garrus forced himself to remain nonchalant as he waited for the shorter man to speak.
"Most impressive, Vakarian. I wonder if you'd do me the honor of telling me where you learned your style." The drell tilted his head a little, inquisitively.
I impressed the great and powerful Thane? Will wonders never cease, but he couldn't deny the flush of pleasure he felt then. "Military mostly, used to spar with special forces. Plus, there was some special mixed forces training on the Citadel I couldn't help but partake in. They brought in experts from just about everywhere to teach us candidates."
Aw, crap, there goes my big mouth again, he could feel Shepard's piercing gaze on the back of his neck as Thane bowed his head in thanks, "Perhaps you'd like to spar with me sometime. I would appreciate the practice, keep my skills sharp."
The deadly little man moved away from him then and Garrus was subjected to many poundings on his back as he watched Thane sidle up to Shepard and whisper something in her ear. Watched her say something back, her eyes on Garrus. Their gazes locked and Garrus smiled a tight little smile at her. He turned back to listen to the crew discuss making this a nightly thing, starting a list of participants which, when eventually handed to Garrus, he was surprised to find Shepard's name near the bottom. He couldn't quite help noticing that when the gathering broke up, Shepard and Thane walked away together. His heart gave a little painful thud, maybe he did need that drink after all.
Seems everyone had problems they needed Shepard to help them with. Patiently, Garrus waited as she sorted out Jacob's father issues, Jack's 'I grew up in a Cerberus research base and was tortured and experimented on' issues and a host of others. It was getting difficult to keep it on hold though, he had an inkling that his 'I need to track down and murder the man who betrayed me and my team' issue might be a little time sensitive.
So, he found himself literally at Shepard's door, shifting nervously from foot to foot, wearing his civies. He'd made sure she was alone, having EDI confirm it, there was no way he could deal with this and interrupting a...liaison between Shepard and Thane. So here he was...
He scratched his fringe, deciding there was nothing for it but to do it. Decisively, he palmed the lock, requesting entry. He heard footsteps coming closer, the door slid open to reveal Shepard in a form fitting leather dress. Very form fitting. His mouth dry, he tried not to gape at her exposed collarbones, or the dip of her waist or the swell of her hips. It seemed there was no safe place to rest his eyes so he decided to look past her, locking his gaze to a point somewhere above her head. "Garrus?"
"Hey, Shepard, I-uh-was hoping to talk to you." He swallowed nervously. She waved him in, turning to sit at a desk with a mirror above it.
"Come in, Garrus. Talk with me while I get ready." Heart thumping, he sidled in, taking a seat near but not too near. He didn't want to seem rude, talking to her from the next room over a partition.
"Ready for what?" He asked, looking around at her little cozy nest. The aquarium was interesting, casting a mellow blue over the room, bubbling tranquilly. He watched the fish with all their bright colors flit from one side of the tank to the other. He relaxed marginally, enough so he could turn to look at her.
"Kasumi wants me to go to some party so she can rob a man. Nothing new there." She snorted, her hands thrusted into her red pile of hair, pinning it up expertly. He felt a hot rush as the curve of her neck was exposed, with soft tendrils of hair trailing enticingly down it. He shifted uncomfortably as his lower plates loosened a bit. Spirits this was bad timing. I can't even get up now without some 'revelations' coming to light, "What did you want to talk to me about?"
Fascinated, he watched her start to apply some sort of paint to her face. He'd known humans did this, but he'd never seen it done, "I hate to take up your time. I know we've all been doing that, maybe way too much. But I don't think this thing I need to do will be able to wait til after the Omega-4 relay, so-"
"Garrus, you know you need only ask, and I'll do my best to do." Oh some of the things I would ask you to do, he choked back the thought as his eyes were riveted to her mouth, as she rubbed some kind of light pink stick over them, dragging the skin in a way that was highly erotic. Her exposed shoulders begged to be caressed and he could only dream of how good she'd smell if he put his face against her jaw, nuzzling her neck. With effort, he shut down his highly imaginative brain.
"You remember Sidonis, the one who betrayed my team." The words dragged out of him, but it was getting easier to ignore the suddenly overwhelmingly female Shepard as he focused on business, "I found a lead on him. There's a...specialist on the Citadel, named Fade. He's an expert on making people...disappear. Sidonis was seen with him."
She looked at him through the reflection of the mirror, pausing her ministrations to rest her elbows on the desk and resting her chin on her clasped hands, "What are you planning to do when you find him?"
He leaned back and gazed at her ceiling, "You humans have a saying, 'an eye for an eye, a life for a life'. He owes me ten lives and I plan to collect."
"You're sure that's how you wanna play it?" He looked at her. Her face was an unreadable mask, he really wished he knew what she was thinking.
"I'm...sure. I don't need you to agree with me, but I'd like your help." He closed his eyes, wincing. A scraping noise made them pop open again to see that Shepard had rolled her chair close to him, knees almost touching his, and was facing him in earnest appraisal.
"Where do we find Fade?" She steepled her hands in a way that was disconcertingly reminiscent of Thane.
Clearing his throat, he continued, "I've arranged a meeting. We'll meet him in a warehouse near the neon markets down on Zakera Ward. Thanks, Shepard, I... appreciate you taking the time to help me."
Shepard stood, looming over him. He noticed that she was wearing shoes with a high heel, like the kind Miranda favored. They made her legs seem to stretch on forever. She smiled at him, reaching over to grab some shiny thing from her desk, "Think you could give me a hand? I'll hold my hair out of the way and you clasp these ends together around my neck."
It was some sort of necklace she handed to him, all silver with chain bits. After studying the clasps for a second, he stood obediently as she turned her back to him. Stretching it out he stepped closer to drape it over her front, trying so very hard not to touch her, his control was already waning. His imagination supplied him with Shepard making a little gasp, because surely that wouldn't happen, right?
Her hand came up to pull her hair out of the way and he froze when he brushed against her bare shoulder. He was still too far away to see the clasp so he leaned closer, eyes rolling back as he smelled her perfumed hair. This was doing nothing for his composure as he fumbled with the tiny latch. Finally it was done after what seemed like an eternity.
His hands hovered over her shoulders and he couldn't help it as his thumbs ghosted so very lightly over her shoulder blades. She trembled, just the tiniest shudder and wrenching his gaze away from that smooth neck with the very last trace of his discipline, he stepped back.
"Thank you, Garrus." Shepard said, breathily. She strode away from him to the door and he could just glimpse a flushed cheek as she got on the elevator. Good thing she hadn't turned around, thought Garrus wryly, looking down at his embarrassment, which had tented his pants. In those last few seconds, he'd been unplated and ready to go. Just barely stopped himself from pulling the bottom edge of that scandalous dress up and showing her exactly how much he desired her. Garrus groaned as his hard-on finally receded into his body, plates coming together to hide it again.
Spirits, that woman will be the death of me.