Garrus chatted away amiably with Zaeed in the back of the shuttle as Shepard caught Tali up on recent events. The turian kept catching little glances from Shepard, wondered briefly if he'd done something wrong down there. His strategy was effective, he knew, after all they were all alive and flying home minus any injuries. He had Zaeed almost rolling in the aisles telling him about the thing with the apples when they landed in the Normandy's cargo bay, the man stood trying to control his laughing only to start up again when he walked past Shepard, who'd shot him a questioning look, brow quirked. Shepard was telling Tali about the new Normandy and its engineering specs as Garrus started gathering his things.
She'd just waved the quarian on when her other hand on his chestguard stopped Garrus from passing her. Quizzically, He looked down at her profile, she had her blank mask in place and he thought, uh oh, here it comes.
A firm push had him sprawled back in a seat. In a flash, Shepard was straddling him, her face inches from his. He swallowed as his heart thumped painfully in his chest. The naked desire in her eyes was doing funny things to his innards. Felt his lower plates loosen almost instantaneously as she ground their armor together. Shepard leaned even closer, filling his vision with those burning green eyes, she growled, "My...God, you are so fucking sexy."
"Uh, I'm pretty sure that's my line." He tried to deflect but his mind quit working when her lips collided with his, her hands massaging under his fringe in that most delicious way. Her scent filled his nostrils, gun oil, ozone and soap. He squirmed a bit, trying to adjust his lower armor to accommodate the emergence of his erection. "So, I did good, huh?"
She hummed an affirmative against his throat, tickling his mandibles with that river of hair. He rolled his hips against her, rumbling in his throat. Her lips kissed his scarred mandible, licking and biting their way to the tip, which she sucked on briefly. Suddenly, his hands were everywhere, trying to get access to any piece of her under her hard suit.
He'd just about popped the first seal when a voice exclaimed from nearby, "KEELAH!"
He had the best view of Shepard's face turning the most interesting shade of crimson as she scrambled off him. He winced as he saw Tali's masked face peeking at them around the door. Garrus lunged to his feet and ducked his head, abashedly, as Shepard ran her hands through her hair, embarrassment in every line of her body. Tali sputtered apologies, which Shepard waved off, her flushed face desperately trying to regain some semblance of composure.
A long awkward silence fell between the three and Garrus shifted uncomfortably. Finally, Tali cocked her hip in a saucy fashion and said laughingly, "Well, it's about time, you two."
And with that unexpected statement, she turned on her heel in their amazed faces and flounced away. Garrus rubbed the back of his neck, trading relieved and embarrassed glances with Shepard. "Guess it's a small ship after all."
Shepard laughed, freely, pulling him down to kiss him one more time, "When the shuttle's a-rockin', don't come a-knockin'. Suppose we shouldn't be necking in here like horny teenagers where just anyone can walk in on us."
"I'm gonna add that one to my repertoire of human idioms. Though I think, if Tali had showed up five minutes later, she'd have seen alot more than 'necking'." He laughed at her shocked expression, looming over her, bracing one hand against the bulkhead as he leaned dangerously close to her, "If you'd like to continue this in private, we could head to the battery and you could tell me more about how sexy I am."
She slapped playfully at his armor, "God, Vakarian, keep it in your pants."
"You were the one just trying to get it out of my pants, if I recall correctly." He twirled a lock of that impossibly soft hair around his finger, growling as seductively as he could. He watched her pupils dilate and that pink tongue flick out to wet her lips. It was pleasing to know that he could affect her as much as she affected him.
She slipped out from under his arm and he just kept himself from tackling her for some more 'necking'. She danced out of his reach, saying, "Tonight, big boy. My place. After our little fight club meets."
He'd almost forgotten about that in the wake of the events on Haestrom. Now he rubbed his hands eagerly as he contemplated it. The rota tonight had him fighting Samara, who's style was unfamiliar and therefore extremely intriguing, he was always happy to pick up new hand to hand skills. Less pleasingly, Shepard was fighting Thane. And while, he did want to know if Shepard could take the cunning assassin, he didn't like the idea of Thane's hands being all over her. His doubts and insecurities reared their ugly heads as he contemplated Shepard being attracted to the smaller man. But he trusted her, he told himself sternly. Til death claimed his soul, he trusted her.
Samara landed a kick to his stomach and he winced in pain. Clearly, she knew how sensitive the midriff area on a turian was. They'd agreed no armor and no biotics very early in the fight. Her Code wouldn't allow her have so severe an advantage against an opponent not similarly armed. Donelly was taking bets off to the side, his raucous calls filtering across the makeshift area they'd constructed.
He tested her by feinting right, then swinging a low kick to her left. She jumped over it easily, coming back with an elbow at his chin level. He swayed back to avoid it, using the momentum to thrust a foot straight out at her. This time she had no time to dodge as his foot collided with her hip. She flew across the ring and landed on her side on the ground. To avoid falling on his back with the force of his follow through, he somersaulted backward neatly, landing on the balls of his feet. This was met with a cheer from around him. However, there was no time for a breath as the asari matriarch rebounded into him, shoulder leading, followed by a flurry of punches. He was forced back and back again, as he fought to block her strikes and control where they were both headed. He didn't want to end up being backed into a wall, that would limit his options. He let her frenzied attacks slow, letting her work herself back into a predictable rhythm.
She was too controlled, too good at stand up fighting to be beaten this way, so he decided to take it to the mat, where his superior size and strength should turn the fight to his favor. Using brute force, a tactic he'd avoided til now and so, one she never saw coming, he tackled her around the middle, using his weight to bring her down under him. He received a ringing blow to the side of his head and his shoulder was almost torn out of its socket as she tried and almost succeeded in breaking free. But finally, he got his arm around her throat from the back and wrapped his legs around her hips, pulling her body straight. She fought for breath and realizing there was no way out of the hold, tapped his arm in submission. He let go immediately, making sure she was okay.
She nodded in gratitude as he helped her to her feet. She looked no less composed as she faced him, a serene smile on her face, "I see that Shepard chooses her people very well, with keen eye to...unpredictability."
Garrus rolled his shoulder with a grimace, "You were going to win if I let you keep punching me. So I had to be...unpredictable."
She laughed lightly, "Well, I'll have to be wary of that move from now on. What is it called?"
"Rear naked choke. Not designed to kill, only for forcing your opponent into submission." Unless you submit them right into unconsciousness, then you could kill at leisure. He only thought this, saying it aloud seemed unnecessary.
"Brutal, but effective. Thank you for the lesson, Vakarian." They walked to the sidelines, where the crew congratulated Garrus on his win. He rubbed some medigel on his shoulder, working it into the joint, sighing in relief as the pain abated. Tali sat next to him, a drink in her hand.
"The new Normandy is a wonder. I could spend all day playing with the drive core." Tali turned her masked face to him and he nodded at her in agreement, still catching his breath. "Anyway, where did you learn to fight like that?"
"When I rejoined C-Sec after Saren, I started taking some extra training, you know, so I could be ready when..." Tali nodded in understanding, knowing that he still didn't want to say it out loud. Tali knew as well as he the rift that divided them all after Shepard died. "So, then I was a Spectre candidate-"
"You were a Spectre candidate? Wow, Garrus, that's...intense." Tali sipped her drink, the straw unobtrusively dipping into the glass.
"Yeah, anyway, it didn't happen, but they brought all these experts in from anywhere and everywhere to show us different styles and I really enjoyed it, you know, I'd always liked hand to hand." He watched them clear the arena of any debris, sweeping the mat free of any obstruction. Shepard and Thane appeared at opposite corners, she was in close fitting clothes and he'd taken his leather jacket off, much to the enjoyment of the female crewmembers, who catcalled shamelessly. He eyed the drell, trying to find what could be appealing. He was certainly well muscled, but trim. There wasn't an ounce of waste on the man. Even Shepard seemed to find his appearance pleasing. It ruffled his sensibilities a bit that Shepard was ogling, but he put it down to natural possessiveness and tried his best to forget it. Not all species mated for life like turians and their relationship was far from formalized. He made himself relax and enjoy the mechanics of the fight.
"Doesn't it seem a bit odd that you're a sniper and a hand to hand expert? They seem like opposing disciplines." Tali waved her hand vaguely. Garrus was barely listening to her, holding his breath with everyone else as they waited for the fight to begin.
"I'm a big bundle of contradictions." Garrus breathed, not wanting to disrupt the anticipatory atmosphere.
Their stances mirrored each other's, face to face across the mat, both relaxed, expressionless, still and silent as statues. In the blink of an eye, that illusion was shattered as they leapt at each other in a blur. Strikes and counterstrikes came in a flurry, almost too fast for Garrus to follow. They seemed to defy gravity in that small space in the cargo hold. The audience swayed and groaned with every exchange. Thane was deadly fast, moving fluidly through the forms he'd learned as a child, his every action precise. He flowed around the room, looking for openings, but finding few, because if he was like water, she was like air, his attacks were perfect but they always landed where she was not. She clearly didn't have the mastery of her body that he did, but she was outthinking him at every turn. Used every advantage at her disposal, every nuance of her surroundings to vex him, from the angle of the lighting to the slight burr on the mat at one corner.
Garrus knew that Shepard was in trouble, because she wasn't fighting some automaton. She was fighting a very skilled, very intelligent assassin who'd been doing precisely this for a very long time. And he was learning. The gap between their understanding of each other was closing rapidly. Garrus found himself on his feet when Thane finally landing a felling blow. Shepard tumbled to the mat, her harsh breathing echoed across the room. Thane moved in for a 'kill' strike and she held her hand up, "I give, I give."
Garrus sucked in a breath to his oxygen deprived lungs as the crowd surged forward to surround the two fighters. Thane seemed nonplussed at their adulation, ducking his head slightly. Garrus went to Shepard, where she was toweling sweat off her body, resisting the urge to pick her up and run upstairs with her. At his tentative touch on her shoulder, she turned and smiled up at him, "That was probably the most intense workout I've ever done."
He couldn't help himself from leaning in really close and whispering in her ear, his voice a throaty growl, "I think that was the sexiest thing I've ever seen."
"What? Thane? Didn't know you'd joined team Krios." She said, a glint of mischief in her eye. He shook his head, not wanting to ask what exactly that meant.
His heart pounded in his chest as he regarded her, sweat soaked and shaking from effort. He needed her now. "I was talking about you, you infuriating woman. I will meet you upstairs in twenty minutes. You better be ready."
"Oooh. I could get used to you giving me orders." She walked away, his eyes were glued to her swaying hips. Mouth dry, he blinked, trying to dampen his raging arousal. It wouldn't be prudent to unplate right now, he was only wearing loose shorts. Didn't want to shock the humans with the appearance of a certain appendage.
Thane tapped him on his shoulder, and grateful for the interruption of his very improper thoughts regarding their commander, he said, "What's up, Thane?"
"I wonder if you enjoyed the fight. If my style was able to show you something new, since I'm aware of your voracious interest in hand to hand." Genuine interest lit Thane's features. This was far removed from the stoic, almost placid man that had first joined their crew. Shepard had changed them all in fundamental, but good ways.
"I was very impressed, Thane. You're gonna have to show me how you did that flipping heel kick. That was slick as hell."
Thane smiled softly, nodding agreement. His brow furrowed and he looked around to see if any of the remaining crew was close enough to eavesdrop. He gestured for Garrus to follow him to a bench. They sat companionably, Thane turned to him, "So, you and Shepard..."
In discomfort, Garrus coughed and scratched his chin, "Yeah, me and Shepard."
The drell sighed in relief and Garrus shot an amazed look at him, "It was clear to me from the beginning that there was a connection there. But you were so... disconnected..."
Garrus started unwrapping the tape from around his hands and wrists as he waited for the man to continue, not really sure where this was going. Thane rubbed his palms together, "I had no wish to cause friction between you and she, although I have to say it was tempting. She's a desirable woman."
"Uh-huh..." This was starting to sound not so good.
Thane rubbed his neck, "So when she asked me on missions without you, I naturally wanted to balk, but found myself accepting anyway. Then, when she asked me to teach her the sniper rifle, I thought maybe she was...interested."
Garrus held his breath, trying not to picture green and pink limbs entwined in the dark and failing miserably. "Why are you telling me this, Thane?"
"I just wanted you to know that she...turned down my advances. After the apple incident, I pondered it for a long time and I realized that she'd had me teach her the sniper rifle...for you. To surprise you. Try to bring you back to yourself." Garrus let out his breath in a whoosh and Thane touched his arm, the cool skin of his palms squeezing lightly, "Now that I indeed consider you a friend, I am glad you found your match in her. For I am sure she was just as lost without you."
Garrus stayed silent for a long time, thinking about how much he didn't deserve her, but so very grateful that she didn't see it that way. What Thane had said was so achingly true, he'd been lost without her, worse than dead really, because the dead don't feel that kind of loss. He shook the thoughts away and focused on the drell, "...Thank you, Thane. For this and for not letting me-you know, on the Citadel."
"You have yourself to thank for that. It never got to the point where I had to become involved." Thane smiled at him, stating dryly, "Besides, it wouldn't have worked out anyway, she intimidates me."
Garrus laughed until his sides ached, "The most deadly assassin alive intimidated by a tiny human woman. You've already proved you could take her on the mat."
"Ah ha, but there lies the crux. I believe she kept the use of her abilities within the rules, much in the same way Samara didn't use her biotics."
"Shepard doesn't have any biotics-" Thane held up a hand to stall him.
"My work as an assassin has shown me that opportunity can be garnered with the judicious application of forethought. I think if she had allowed herself some, I would not have been the victorious one tonight." Thane shook his head in awe, "It is...frightening how brilliant she is, it's almost unnatural. If I had not already heard stories of her prowess before her miraculous resurrection, I would be tempted to think that she was programmed to think in this way. Before you take offense, I mean to say I do not think of her as a machine. She is very much alive."
Garrus just closed his eyes and listened to the other man's voice, listened only to what he meant, "She's no AI. I would have known when she found me on Omega. Whatever it is that Cerberus did, they didn't change her."
"I understand. It doesn't change the fact that when we started fighting, she was twenty steps ahead of me. Meaning that she knew me well enough to predict exactly what I would do. Imagine if she'd had time beforehand to really plan it out. What would I have been able to do if she'd been a thousand steps ahead of me? Not much, I think." Thane shrugged, looking around to him. "She can't have seen that many of my moves before tonight. But she adapted perfectly nonetheless. She's like an oracle, sieving possibilities from the river of time."
Garrus wondered at the poetry of that statement, realizing its truth. She didn't see a possible future, she saw all possible futures, at least the immediate ones. But he also knew that she wasn't infallible, he'd seen her at her lowest, knew there were blind spots in her all-encompassing eye. Like the thing that happened with Ashley on Virmire, or that she'd died unprepared, even the way she couldn't help herself connecting to these people around her despite the face that they were all more than likely going to die on this mission. He looked over at the assassin sadly, "No, she's human. So very human."
Thane understood that Garrus meant mortal, species notwithstanding. He leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes, steepling his hands in front of him, "She seems like a Siha to me."
"What does that mean?"
"Ha. She asked the same thing. I refused to tell her." He had a little smile on his face, with a hint of mischief. Garrus smiled widely at the man, surprised at the breadth of emotion that he now exhibited. "One of the warrior-angels of Arashu. A fierce and tenacious protector."
"Wait. You refused to tell her?" Garrus said it like it was the most incredulous thing he'd ever heard. "Seriously, how are you breathing right now?"
Thane laughed, rubbing his chin, "Indeed. Maybe a Siha can be merciful as well."
A ping on his omnitool made him aware that EDI was trying to get his attention. "Yes, EDI."
"Commander Shepard wants to know when exactly you were planning on bringing her that debriefing."
Oh, crap, he thought with chagrin. Thane was watching him, knowingly, saying as Garrus scrambled away, "Let us hope she is merciful."