Title: Like We Never Loved at All
Author: Adrian Jade
Summary: You never looked so good as you did last night underneath the city lights. There walking with your friends, laughing at the moon. I swear you looked right through me.
John was nervous about seeing the boys again. His worst fear was they wouldn't recognize him. He took a deep breath and got out of the truck. He had been sitting outside Eve's home for about 10 minutes. He noted that there were 2 cars in the driveway, Chase was home. The thought of another man being with his wife and taking care of his kids made his blood boil. Sadly he had to remind himself that she wasn't his wife anymore.
"Daddy" Zoey met him halfway up the stone path leading to the front door. He picked her up and gave her a big hug and a kiss.
"Hey baby girl how are you doing today?" he asked.
"Good" she replied "me and Jayson ate pops"
"Well that explains the purple face"
"Hi dad" Jayson said from his seat on the steps where he was just finishing a cherry popsicle.
"Hi Jay"
"Mama and Chase are inside with the boys" he wiped his face with the back of his hand.
"Ok well I was planning to take all you kids to the zoo if that's cool with you kids"
"Yeah that's fine we haven't went to the zoo in a while" Jayson said.
"Ok then go and grab your shoes" John told him.
Jayson stood and entered the house. Zoey who was standing next to her father noted his resistance because she grabbed his hand and pulled him inside.
"Mama's in here" she said leading John into the living room.
Eve and Chase were sitting on the floor playing with the boys. Both boys were glad in overalls, Jonathan was wearing a gray Nike t-shirt and Braylen was wearing a maroon Baby Gap T-shirt.
"Mama daddy is here" Zoey announced still dragging John around.
John couldn't help but stare he couldn't believe how big his sons had gotten. The last time he had seen them they were still little babies but now they were little boys. They both were walking around with huge smiles on their faces.
"Hey boys" John said crouching down near them.
Both boys took a look at him. Braylen ran over behind his mother and Jonathan did the same thing to Chase.
"They are just going through a shy phase right now" Eve assured him "Braylen honey that's daddy there's no need to be afraid of him"
'Look Zoey loves daddy" John said giving Zoey a kiss on the cheek in hopes that it would make him a little less scary to them.
Braylen, who had always been the much more cautious twin, walked over to John and removed his hat from his head and put it onto his much smaller one. He grinned at John as the hat came over his big blue eyes. He instantly began to babble happily to himself. John picked the boy up and held him close. It was an emotional moment for him because it wasn't until then that it really hit him how much time he had missed in his children's lives.
"I love you baby boy" he whispered kissing the top of his son's head.
He locked eyes with Eve and she could see it in his eyes that he was just so relieved to be back in his children's lives. She felt like she had made it hard on him to see the kids, she felt incredibly guilty about it.
"Ready to go dad" Jayson strolled back into the room with his shoes on.
"What are you guys doing today?" Eve asked Jayson.
"We're going to the zoo" Jayson answered her.
"Oh fun" Eve said "I packed a bag of snacks and fun things for you guys ... oh and Jayson make sure if the boys are going to be out of the carriage they have sunscreen on and a hat"
"You know Eve you can me these things" John remarked.
Eve just shot him an annoyed look. John just smiled to himself because he knew it was just a matter of time before he had Eve back in his arms.
"Jonny boy come here to daddy" John tried gently to coax the boy away from who John deemed the enemy.
Jonathan refused to move from Chase's side. John was getting annoyed, not with Jonathan of course but with Eve and Chase for doing nothing to help him. Eve's eyes shifted from John to Jonathan and back. She was afraid John was going to blow up soon which is something she knew was going to happen in the near future. Chase was a little nervous of Eve's ex husband, he had heard about John's temper more than once since he and Eve had been together.
"Jonny it's me daddy there is no reason to be scared" John said softly as he tried to assure the young boy he was in no danger. Jon moved a little but he still seemed to be very cautious.
"It's ok sweetie daddy won't hurt you" Eve decided to help John out.
"Come on stupid Jonathan I wanna go to the zoo" Zoey complained.
Jonathan slowly inched away from Chase. John's wrist watch seemed to have captured his curiosity. John grinned at him.
"Jonny you remember this don't you?" he asked softly.
Jonathan finally walked over to John and let himself be picked up.
"I missed you so much Jonny boy"
After that John left the house with the kids. He had went out and bought the boys and Zoey their own car seats for his car. He and Randy had spent most of last night trying to install them. Once he had the 3 younger kids in their car seats. He climbed into the driver's seat. Jayson was sitting in the passenger seat. He raised an eyebrow at the boy.
"What I'm old enough to sit in the front seat now" Jayson informed him.
"Sure you are" John put the keys in the ignition and put the car in gear.
Jayson turned on the radio and Rockstar by Nickleback was playing. Jayson and Zoey began singing along to it. Even the boys added their own versions of what they believed to be singing to the song. John laughed as he listened to all the kids. He decided to join the fun. Jayson and Zoey knew every word to the song even the words that were edited from the radio.
"Mom has their cd and we listen to it all the time" Jayson explained after the song was over.
"You know Jay I actually stood outside your mother's bedroom window in the pouring rain with a guitar singing Far Away by Nickleback to her because I wanted her to forgive me for something stupid that I had done"
Jayson giggled "You really did that?" he asked.
"Yep and I'd do it again 10 times over if I thought it would help me get your mom back"
"It's hard because I know she is happy with Chase and I want mom to be happy but I also want us all to be a family again like we were before" Jayson admitted.
"Jay the last thing anyone wants is for you to feel like you should have to choose between me and your mom because if that were the case then it would be really unfair to you" John started off by saying "it's normal for you to want things the way they were before ... I know that you had a pretty crappy life before we found you and you had just gotten used to the stability of the home with me and your mom and then to be kidnapped and moved from the only home you ever really knew must have messed with your mind just a little"
"I wasn't scared when Jessie kidnapped us cause I knew you and mom would save us"
"Of course we were going to find you Jay because we both love you and want what is best for you and your brothers and sister"
"I still want things like they were before"
"I know you do buddy"
They arrived at the local zoo shortly after that. John set up the twins carriage as Jayson helped Zoey out of the truck. John got Braylen out first and buckled him into the carriage before going to get Jonathan. As Eve had instructed John put sunscreen on both boy and Zoey. He let Jayson put it on for himself.
"So what do you want to see first?" he asked the kids.
"Penguins!" Zoey exclaimed excitedly.
"I really don't care" Jayson said.
"The penguins it is then" John said beginning to push the stroller in the direction of the penguins.
"Daddy did you know penguins dance?" Zoey asked as they watched the few penguins they had at this zoo. John couldn't figure out why there were penguins at the zoo but there were.
"Really I had no idea baby"
"Yeah I saw Happy Feet and they danced"
"Stupid penguins don't dance and the penguins in that movie weren't even real" Jayson replied rudely.
"Jay don't call your sister stupid it's not nice and in this family if we don't have something nice to say we keep our mouths shut" John scolded him.
Jayson rolled his eyes before crossing his arms. He stood there defiantly just waiting for the opportune moment to strike.
"Whatever" he finally said walking away.
"Oh my gah I suddenly have an urge to call my parents and apologize for everything I ever did to piss them off as a child" John said to himself.
"Daddy can we see the lions now" Zoey asked impatiently tapping her foot.
"Sure honey"
Jayson remained moody for the rest of the day and he didn't even say goodbye when John dropped the kids off that night. He just walked right into the house and up to his room. Eve had come out of the house to help John with the boys who had fallen asleep.
"What's the matter with Jay?" she asked him while getting a sleeping Braylen out of his car seat.
"I wish I could say I knew he was fine until I reprimanded him for calling Zoey stupid"
"He called Zoey stupid?" Eve asked surprised.
"Yeah it kinda threw me for a loop too all I can think is it's just some phase he is going through right now"
Eve couldn't help but nod "This whole thing has been really rough on him and I don't really blame him for acting out that doesn't make it any less frustrating though"
"Listen Eve I know what I did was horrible and I can understand that you have no romantic feelings for me anymore and I guess I'll have to deal with that but we have kids together so I think we should at least be civil"
"I agree all that really matters is what is best for all the kids"
"Maybe we can be friends"
She smiled at him "Maybe one day"
"So where is Chase?" John asked noticing Chase's car was no longer in the driveway.
"He left for a few days you know how the wrestling world can be" she said with a wink.
"I can imagine" he grinned.
"Come in the house and after we put the boys to bed I'll make some coffee"
"I'd like that" he said following her into the house.