ARGH I DID IT AGAIN DIDN'T I

Well, I'm back again, and I've got the same excuse as last time.

I haven't had the time! I was actually part of a theatre festival and our play just got over recently (it went REALLY well :D)

Once again, you reviewers are the best! I'm so so sorry I don't personally reply to all your reviews, but I'm short on time as it is, and every second I can spare to write counts! (oh dear, exclamation marks ;)

Alright, I also decided that the POINT of a this story is to make fun of Mary-Sues, and I'm going to focus on the badly written stereotypes a bit more :) I think I've been getting a bit too carried away xD

Alright then, here goes!

Poor Ginevra

Mary laughed at the expression on Hermione's and Harry's faces. "Don't worry, sillies! You have lunch now!"

"But we just ate breakf-" Hermione began, but Harry shook his head wearily.

"I give up." He threw his hands up and slumped away to the Great Hall, followed by Hermione.

Mary bounded after the two of them. "Oh, I can't wait for lunch!"

"Why?" Harry asked cautiously. "What happens?"

"Oh, you'll see!" She smiled mischievously, bouncing away.

"I wish she'd stop smiling so much." Harry muttered dejectedly.

Hermione nodded absent-mindedly.

Mary sat next to Ginny, grinning from ear to ear.

"What?" Ginny snapped, not in the mood for any of Mary's chatter.

"How were your classes?"

"Just great." She muttered, swirling her fork around her plate.

Across her, Ron was stuffing his mouth with food like he'd been starved for a month. Harry and Hermione walked in at that moment and stared at Ron, fascinated.

As always, Ginny's heart did a little back-flip when she saw Harry. He noticed her and smiled, moving to sit next to her.

Her stomach fluttered, but she schooled herself to act nonchalant. "Hey."

Harry nodded in Mary's direction. "So, you're the lucky one?"

Ginny moaned. "I hope not."

As if on cue, Mary jumped. "Oh, Ginny! I just remembered!"

"What?" Ginny asked, irritated.

"I had to deliver this note to Blaise! Since you've finished eating, could you do it for me?"

"I'm not..." Ginny stared at her suddenly empty plate incredulously.

Mary lay a hand on Ginny's shoulder in what was meant to be a friendly manner, but Ginny yanked away from her and pushed her chair back.

"Fine!" She said sharply. "I'll go."

Snatching the note from Mary's hand, she walked away and began scanning the hall for Blaise and found him at the Slytherin table.

Of course. What else could she expect?

With a backwards I'm-going-to-skin-you-alive glare at Mary, she naviguated her way through the tables, in a hurry to get back to her own seat (next to Hary, of course).

"Hey, Ginny." Blaise was lounging on his chair casually, winking at her.

"Ugh." She thought, her mind running through methods to make Mary's life a living hell. (AN: Alright, this chapter is rambling and rambling, but I promise the next chapter will be good x)

"Mary told me to give you this." She held out the note by her fingertips, stretching her arm, unwilling to get close.

"Thanks." He winked again, despite the fact that he was a pure-blood who despised the mere mention of Muggles or Weasleys, and nothing short of the most extraordinary miracle (in this case a Mary-Sue) could cause him to flirt with Ginny Weasley in front of his fellow Slytherins. (AN: I, personally, am a guilty fan of Ginny/Blaise, but I haven't found a single well-written fanfiction. I actually found one where (can you believe it) Hermione was Blaise's twin sister and a lot of weird stuff happened. If anyone happens to find that, link me! xD I could use a laugh x)

Mary materialised next to Ginny. "Oh! Hogsmeade trip this weekend!"

"Are you making this up as you go?" Ginny demanded. "I swear you're making this up as you go!"

Mary ignored her, and smiled pointedly at Blaise.

"What?" He snapped, momentarily reverting to his normal self.

Ginny made to move away, but Mary wrapped an arm around Ginny's shoulder, forcing her to stay.

"Let go before I hex you." Ginny warned through gritted teeth.

"Oh!" Blaise's charming grin snapped back on. "Ginny, will you go to Hogsmeade with me?"

"You must be out of your mi- YES!" Ginny's denial turned into an ecstatic exclamation.

Mary smiled in a satisfied manner.

Ginny shoved Mary away forcefully. "What the hell was-" She clutched her head suddenly as though in pain.

Blaise immediately stood up and moved to Ginny's side. "Are you alright?"

"Aww!" Mary wiped an imaginary tear from her eye.

"Let me take you to Madame Pomfrey." He volunteered.

By then, Hermione was at Ginny's other side, having noticed the commotion. "What's wrong?"

"Hmm." Mary pondered. "Now this is a dilemna."

"What now?" Hermione was losing her temper.

"Does Ginny need Blaise to take her to the hospital wing? Or you to take her to Snape?"

"What?!" Hermine coloured red. "This isn't the time for your... fun! Ginny, what's wrong?" She addressed the last part to Ginny, who was clutching her head and shaking it vigorously.

"Come with me." Blaise said decisively. "I'll take you to Madame Pomfrey."

Mary's eyes flashed. "That's my decision."

"She's not well!" Blaise protested.

Mary made a dismissive sound. "Unimportant to the plot. You see, everyone wants romance! And romance doesn't need a plot! Just a lot of snogging and sappy dialogues! I suppose you and Ginny could snog in the hospital wing.."

Exasperated, Hermione grabbed Ginny's arm. "C'mon, Ginny. Let's go."

Mary's eyes narrowed dangerously. "You don't want to be doing that."

"I'm sick of you and your mood swings!" Hermione told her without turning back.

Mary watched the two retreating figured with a gloomy expression. "She's ruining my story! Oh, I'm going to show her!"

Hermione lay Ginny down on the bed.

"She's not the first." Madame Pomfrey was telling her. "We've had plenty in here- ever since that Marietta joined."

Hermione noticed the way she spat out Mary's name. "I take it you don't like her?"

Madame Pomfrey made a disgusted noise and swore. "I told Dumbledore there was something wrong with her! But did he listen? No! And look at poor Ginevra here-"

"That's it!" Hermione interrupted excitedly. "Dumbledore!"

"Oh, you won't get any help from him, dear."

"No- he sent us that note!" Hermione was getting more and more excited by the minute. "If I could only talk to him-" A sudden thought struck her. "Madame Pomfrey, why aren't you affected?"

She shrugged. "I've been exposed to a lot of illnesses. I'm pretty resilient."

"So it is kind of like an illness." The Gryffindor was intrigued. "I wonder if..."

Her wondering was cut short by the once again unwelcome sight of Marietta Sue.

"Hermy! Sweetie!" Mary spotted her.

"Sweetie?" Hermione asked indignantly.

"I've got an important message for you from a professor!"

"Which professor?" Hermione asked, with a sinking feeling that she knew what the answer would be.

"Snape!" Mary smiled wickedly. "Remember your detention?"

"Is it cancelled?" Hermione asked, without much hope.

"Don't be silly!" Mary giggled. "It's now!"

If looks could kill, Mary would have been a pile of ashes on the floor of the hospital wing.

OH DEAR

I did not mean to take so long.

I feel like the quality's gone a bit down on this on, but please bear with me! I promise I'll try my best on the next one x)

And I'm terribly sorry about the hiatus, folks. I don't have anything to say.

Just... thank you so so much for staying with me for over a year! I couldn't ask for better readers/reviewers! :*

PLEASE leave a review- it means the world to me!