Give His Heart a Break.
Authors Note: So, once I've finished writing this chapter up and it's posted I am going to be having a look through the competition entries and pick my winner. I hope you enjoy this chapter. :)
Disclaimer: Not mine; never will be mine! =(
Chapter Ten: He Didn't See Nor Observe.
Sherlock took control of the kiss.
His tongue running along her lower lip in a gentle, pleading way.
It didn't take a second for Molly to part her lips and allow their two tongues to tangle in a bigger web than they'd already made.
Although, the kiss became more desperate, there was still a tender edge to it.
Sherlock gripped Molly's cheeks in his hands, softly; his thumbs caressing the silken skin coating her cheekbones.
Molly's hands held on to his arms, not wanting him to pull away from her.
Both were so wrapped up in the kiss.
They forgot everything of the world they resided in.
They forgot every little detail of their lives.
They forgot every minute problem they had.
They simply got lost in one another; taking comfort in one another.
The world did not seem like such a cruel place anymore.
That was until Molly snapped to attention.
She ripped her lips from his.
Her eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlines of an oncoming vehicle.
She tried to stutter out some words.
They all seemed to evade her.
What was she doing?
This was Sherlock Holmes.
Sherlock Holmes the world's one and only consulting detective.
Sherlock Holmes the man she had had an insane school girl crush on.
Sherlock Holmes the best friend of the man she was in love with.
She didn't say another word as she jumped up from the couch and ran to the sanctuary of her bedroom.
Sherlock watched her run.
He wasn't quite sure why but the look in her eyes as she stared at him, before running, left him with a numbness filling the entirety of his body.
Why had she run?
She'd been enjoying the kiss.
He could tell.
Elevated pulse; the way she was gripping on to him; how quickly she let him in to the depths of her quite pleasant mouth.
He raised an eyebrow and sat himself back on the couch.
Pleasant mouth?
Her mouth was far from being pleasant.
It was acceptable but not enjoyable.
He checked his pulse.
The signs were all there.
He'd enjoyed kissing Molly and her less-than adequate mouth.
Why was that?
He did not know.
There was no logic to behind why he had.
He sighed, aloud.
Why was he feeling so numb?
He rarely felt emotions.
But this, this was different to any of those petty things he'd felt before.
It almost hurt.
But only almost.
Usually, he just felt nothing.
Like he was empty.
This.
This was new.
This to him felt like something was missing.
He didn't like feeling this way.
It was off putting.
He ran a hand over his face and looked around the living room.
He needed clues.
There had to be some clues in this room.
He saw nothing.
He stood up and began to pace.
The numbness had erupted inside him when he seen the look in Molly's eyes.
What had been in Molly's eyes?
It was hard to pin point.
This wasn't his division of expertise.
This was to do with emotions, feelings.
He didn't do this kind of thing.
He didn't feel.
Well, not exactly.
He was supposed to be nothing but a man made of metal.
He sighed.
What was that in Molly's eyes?
He searched the depths of his mind palace; trying to see if there was anything he could find that would help him.
She had looked… sad?
Why had she looked sad?
She had no reason to be sad.
Well, she did… but not in that moment.
Perhaps it wasn't sadness.
Despair?
Maybe.
He thought not though.
She had seemed a little disappointed.
Disappointed with what though?
His kiss.
He rolled his eyes.
He had kissed her to perfection.
He had studied her.
He had given her everything he knew she'd like.
Definitely not that.
Disappointed in him?
He shook his head.
No, it wasn't that.
He sat down on his chair in her living room, and brought his knees to his chin.
He stilled for a millisecond.
What was that, that had just flickered through his mind?
Disappointed in herself.
He frowned, a noticeable one that was etching a deep line down his forehead.
What could she possibly be disappointed in herself for?
He sat for a few minutes.
His thoughts were silent.
Confusion had taken over.
He closed his eyes and took in a steadying breath.
He then saw it.
His knees slipped down from his chin and to the floor.
His eyes slowly reopening.
She was disappointed in herself for giving in to him.
Why was she disappointed in herself for that?
Well, it was quite simple really.
She was in love with John Watson.
He hadn't even realised it.
He hadn't even seen it.
Let alone got a chance to observe it.
How idiotic of him.
He sighed, once again.
He had once believed love to be nothing but a weakness.
He still did believe that.
But, there was an exception to that belief.
That exception came in the form of Molly Hooper.
Love made Molly stronger.
He'd noticed it in the months Molly and John had dated.
The thing that made Molly Hooper weak was something he didn't want to believe.
The thing that made Molly Hooper weak was simply… himself.
Sherlock Holmes was Molly Hooper's weakness.
That was why she had looked so disappointed.
That was why he had felt numbness take control of his body.
Subconsciously, he had realised it.
And he hadn't liked it.
His fingers began to drum against the chairs armrest.
His thoughts lingering on one thing: Molly was in love with John.
His fingers stopped.
His hand gripped on to the armrest.
His fingers starting to turn white with how hard he was gripping it.
His chest hurt; he wanted to claw at it.
He felt suffocated; why couldn't he draw in breath?
He looked towards the stairs that Molly had escaped to in what felt like moments ago.
He stared there for a while, trying to collect his thoughts.
It was time.
He closed his eyes.
He knew it was time.
It was time to analyse the thing he had been dodging since Molly had first told him about her date with John.
He knew.
He had always known.
He knew what caring felt like.
He felt it for John, for Mrs Hudson… heck, he even felt it for Lestrade.
But this, this thing he felt for Molly… it wasn't caring.
It was more than that.
He didn't want it to be more than that.
It was too complicated to deal with.
His life was too complex for this to even be a part of it.
But then again, he could simply admit it to himself but not let it get in the way of his life.
He couldn't allow this to get out.
It would affect his cases.
People would use it against him.
He would not allow that.
He just… wouldn't.
His eyes reopened.
He lent back in to the chair more.
It was now or never.
On his lips a bitter smirk drew up.
He felt the same way he did when jumping from St. Bart's roof.
He raised his hands and pressed his palms and fingers together.
He stared at the wall opposite him.
…
He, Sherlock Holmes, liked Molly Hooper.
…
He, Sherlock Holmes, liked Molly Hooper as someone more than who you just care about.
…
He, Sherlock Holmes, had feelings for Molly Hooper.
He scoffed at the word.
But he knew it was true.
There was nothing he could do about it.
He'd just ignore it.
And that was what he had done.
For the next month after the lone confession, he and Molly had not spoken a word.
She had gone back to work, taking extra shifts and claiming they were to catch up on pay that she had missed.
They both knew it was a lie.
She even knew that he knew what she was doing.
But neither one said a word about it.
He concentrated on any case that came his way, no matter how dull it was.
It got him out of the flat.
They simply skirted around one another without complaint.
During that sixth month after the night John had discovered he was a live, and a little more than that, he received a text message.
You on a case? My blog is in need of an update. –JW
Sherlock hadn't shown any emotion.
But to the empty flat, which was littered with his findings of his current case, it was obvious he was overjoyed at being forgiven by his best friend.
Yes. Be there in 20. –SH
And that was that.
He packed up every single one of his items and took a taxi to 221B, Baker Street.
He didn't leave a note.
He didn't even text a goodbye.
That night when Molly came home, she didn't even notice his departure.
It wasn't until she was lying in bed that night, her thoughts on nothing but John that something clicked inside of her.
Something that almost felt like gratefulness that he was gone.
Authors Note: Chapter ten all written up for you right there! I hope you liked it. I hope it didn't depress the crap out of you too much. I like it. I'm so excited for the next chapter which I am hoping to write up later tonight. It's one I've been dying to throw your way! You're all going to love it (perhaps). ;) Any who, please review and let me know what you think! I'm going to go and judge my competition now!
Petal.