Give His Heart a Break.
Authors Note: I'm starting to write this and I've only just posted chapter seventeen. I just can't help it, I've just had so many ideas pop in to my head for this chapter. So, I've added them in and I'm so excited to write it. There are three songs that have inspired me to write what I am about to. One is 'Tattoo' by Jordin Sparks; 'Words I Couldn't Say' the Leighton Meester version; and finally 'Don't You Wanna Stay' by Kelly Clarkson and Jason Aldean. The last song was the last chapter's inspiration. However, I want to put the beginning of the last chapter at the end of this one now and so, seen as the song basically inspired the beginning of that chapter… it's for this one now. Although it does inspire the last part too; so anyways, without further ado I give you chapter eighteen.
Disclaimer: It's still not mine.
Chapter Eighteen: When A Kiss Feels Like This.
Molly Hooper couldn't believe it.
She couldn't believe it at all.
The day she had once believed would never come… was here.
She was sat in front of a dressing table in the modest church John and she had picked.
Everything had fallen in to place.
There wasn't a single thing left for her to do, other than get ready and show up.
She was currently staring at her reflection in the mirror.
A thin layer of makeup was covering her face: her eyes were coated in a light cream shadow and on the outer corners there was a light purple colour that gave her eyes a smoke-like look. Her cheeks held a light dusting of pale pink, and her lips a sweet, deep pink, making them stand out but not in an overdone way like when she wore red.
Behind her, her cousin, the hairdresser was curling her hair so she could clip some back from her face, while leaving the rest hanging down Molly's back.
It was a simple style.
It was Molly's style.
As Molly stared at her reflection in the mirror, her mind slipped away to the man who was on the other side of the church in his own provided room.
He was with her soon-to-be-husband.
She had barely seen him since the day he had picked out her bridal gown, which hung in one of the rooms corners.
She had tried to not think about him since that day.
There wasn't really much she could think about.
She had let him go that day.
She had let her dream go that day.
She had realised her reality and saw no point in holding on any longer.
Her reality wasn't a terrible one.
John was wonderful.
He'd be a terrific husband.
He'd be an amazing father.
He was everything she could possibly hope for.
But still, he was there in the corner of her mind.
She supposed he always would be, wouldn't he?
He may not have loved her.
He may never have been with her.
But she had loved him.
She had loved him deeper than she knew possible.
He was still imbedded in her heart.
He always would be.
She knew that.
But, it was time to move on.
She needed to live her life.
She couldn't wait around for him another second longer.
He was never going to love her.
And even if he could, it was just too late.
She saw that now.
That's why she had let go.
He'd played too many games with her.
She didn't have time for games anymore.
She was sick of them.
If she didn't marry John, they'd go right back to them.
He'd use her in the cruellest ways to get whatever he wanted.
She just couldn't live that way again.
It hurt too much.
She was getting too old to have a guard up all the time.
She shouldn't have had to protect herself from him.
But she had.
Molly blinked once and watched her cousins hands toy with her hair; her mind slowly began to drift back off in to her thoughts.
She slipped back in to the one of their last, true day together.
Her breath hitched, softly.
She could still feel his fingertips brushing at her back as he zipped up the dress.
It had felt so right.
She had forgotten everything.
She had forgotten she was engaged to another man; a man who just happened to be his friend.
She had been so ready to get lost in him.
But as she had gazed in to his eyes in the mirror, she had just seen it.
He wasn't her future.
He'd never be her future.
He was just a dream.
That was all he ever would be.
They weren't made for one another.
She wasn't going to be the infamous woman who broke Sherlock Holmes' beliefs.
Forever, she would be nothing but his pathologist.
She accepted that.
She didn't like it.
But she accepted the fate she was destined for.
It was her path to walk and she'd walk it without looking back.
Her eyes took in her reflection once more.
Her cousin had now pinned back her hair and was placing a small flower, that matched her lips, in to the left side of Molly's hair.
Molly smiled at her reflection.
She looked good.
Her cousin grinned at her.
"What do you think, Mols?"
Molly looked to her cousin in the mirror and grinned back.
"I love it! Thank-you!"
Her cousin smiled and nodded her head to the door.
"I'll be back shortly. Get your dress on and I'll zip it up in a second."
Molly nodded and moved to grab her dress as her cousin left the room.
She stepped in to the material and slowly slid it up her body, in went her arms; the dress now hung loose on her body as she needed for it to be zipped.
While she waited for her cousin to come back, she went over to slip in to her shoes.
They weren't anything special.
They were just Molly.
They matched her dress in colour; the sole was a platform with a thick high heel.
Molly had her back to the door when it opened again.
She didn't turn around.
She knew it would be her cousin.
"Do me." She murmured to her as she looked down at her dress and began smoothing it down.
Her cousin said nothing as she moved towards her.
…
Molly's eyes widened as she then felt his hand on the small of her back.
Her head shot up and a small squeak of embarrassment passed her lips.
They may have been in this position once before.
This time it was different.
This time she had no bra on.
The dress already had support inside.
Her back was completely bare to him.
Like he had before, his hands teasingly trailed up the skin on her back as he tugged the zip up.
Time seemed to freeze.
It was as if they were the only two in the world right now.
For Molly, it was agony.
She had accepted her future, yes.
But she still was attracted to him.
She couldn't control the affect he had on her.
She gulped and after what felt like a lifetime, the zip was in place.
His hands slowly dragged down her back and then dropped to his sides.
She turned around to face him.
She was trying to keep her face neutral.
She knew it was no used.
He was Sherlock Holmes after all.
But she still tried.
He said nothing of it.
His eyes rolled over her body as he took in the sight of the woman who wasn't going to be walking towards him.
"If it's possible, Molly, I think you look more beautiful than the day you tried this dress on."
Her lips went dry.
Her throat felt scratchy.
She wasn't quite sure she could speak.
But she had to.
He was waiting for her to.
She dropped her eyes to the floor, thankful for the blusher on her cheeks which was consuming the real blush rising to her face.
"Thank-you, Sherlock."
He nodded and moved towards the door.
He locked it.
He didn't want her cousin or mother or sister to interrupt the moment he was about to have with her.
The thought had slipped in to his mind the moment he laid eyes on her.
She had to know.
He couldn't let her make a choice when she didn't know all the facts.
He turned back towards her.
She hadn't moved.
He began to step towards her again.
Her eyes locked on to his.
Once he was in front of her, he made sure they kept their eyes on one another.
"Molly, I want to tell you something." He whispered.
Her eyes widened a fraction; he took a hold of her hands in his own.
His thumbs began to caress her skin.
"I wasn't going to do this, Molly. But seeing you standing her right now… I have to. I just know I have to."
Molly let her tongue slip out to lick her lips; her heart was beginning to pick up pace.
"I'm just going to tell you the whole damn truth. When you came home that day and told me about your date with John, something inside me changed. I didn't realise it until about a month ago exactly what. After that day, I tried everything I could to ruin what you and John were building. I didn't agree with the two of you being together and I still don't. But I know it's right."
He closed his eyes for a few moments and took in a breath.
They re-opened and captured Molly's gaze.
"I'm sure you noticed that after the day at the bridal boutique, I suddenly wasn't there anymore. That's because I understood that what I was doing was wrong and I had to stop it. I finally understood why you are doing what you are doing. I accepted it. About a month ago though, I revisited everything and I figured out something you need to know. I wasn't going to tell you but the decision you are about to make is one of importance to you and I believe you should know all the facts. It's the only way to make a logical choice after all."
Subconsciously, he drew her nearer to him.
Molly didn't dare breathe as she listened to his every word.
Her heart was hammering now.
He could feel her heart hammering through the pulse he was now feeling on her wrist.
"A month ago Molly, I discovered that I… I…"
There was no easy way to say this.
There was no easy way at all.
He closed his eyes.
He didn't know whether he should tell her or not.
He opened them again and he studied her for a few moments – they went unnoticed by her.
She was on the edge now.
She was dying to know.
"I discovered that I've changed. Everything's changed. My feelings towards you have changed. That was why I did everything I could to break John and yourself up. I guess the term for what I was feeling then was… jealousy." He spat the word out.
He couldn't say it.
He couldn't bring himself to destroy her.
He already knew the choice she would have made if he had told her.
That was why he wanted to do it.
He didn't want John to have the pleasure of her walking towards him looking like she did.
Molly stared up at him in shock.
Jealousy?
Sherlock was jealous.
Sherlock was jealous of John and herself.
Sherlock was jealous of John and herself because he had feelings for her.
She certainly hadn't seen that one coming.
She had no words for him.
He dropped her hands and moved around her.
When he was back in her line of vision she discovered he held her veil.
She looked up at him with confused eyes.
"Better get this on. The wedding is starting shortly."
She couldn't speak.
She simply nodded and allowed him to place the thin material on her head.
He didn't pull the veil down over her face.
He looked at her.
He truly looked at her.
He took in everything about the woman who had trampled all over him without even knowing it.
The woman who had changed him.
He slowly bent down and pressed his lips to hers.
It wasn't a passionate kiss.
It was soft and bittersweet.
He pulled her closer to him; her body now flush against his own.
He was careful as he held the back of her head in his hands – he didn't want to ruin the hairstyle her cousin had produced.
Molly's own hands were resting on his hips and she gently pushed her tongue in to the depths of his mouth.
She explored every possible place she could reach and before they pulled away from one another she soothingly ran her tongue over the length of his.
They were now staring at one another.
Their breathing was slightly deeper but the only real sign that the kiss had taken place was the smeared lipstick on both of their faces.
"Goodbye, Molly Hooper."
…
"Goodbye..."
It had been the final goodbye between them.
This part of their life was over now.
They had put it to rest; they were letting it lay dormant.
Molly moved over to the mirror to fix her makeup; Sherlock wiped his lips with the back of his hand.
Once all evidence of the kiss was removed, she picked up her bouquet.
He came towards her and pulled the short veil down over her face.
They stared at one another for a moment until they were interrupted by a knock at the door.
"It's time, Molly."
She looked up at Sherlock who was smiling at her sadly.
"Let's go, soon-to-be Mrs Watson."
She smiled back at him in the same manner.
She gripped on to his extended arm and he led her to the door.
Unlocking it, they stepped outside and waited for Molly's sister, her one and only bridesmaid, to walk down the aisle.
They were waiting quietly behind the closed doors.
Molly's breathing picked up as she heard her song begin to play.
She looked up at Sherlock before back to the door.
She took in a shaky breath and closed her eyes.
Authors Note: There it is! The second from the last chapter. How do you all feel right now? I'm pretty excited. I really enjoyed writing this. It's so sad! But damn! I think this is my favourite chapter! Sherlock didn't even let her have a choice! Bitch! I hope you liked it. I really want to get the final chapter up tonight but if I don't expect it tomorrow! Let me know how you are all feeling and perhaps, what you all believe is going to happen!
Petal.