Disclaimer: I in no way own this, make money on this, or claim to. If you would like to read a more official, and lengthy, disclaimers please refer to Ch.2 of Seriously Sirius! Thank you.
Warning: This is getting serious. Upcoming slash if you haven't read the previous chapter you should. If you read past this you acknowledge that you have read the warning and decided to continue to read, despite it. In this case if you read something that you find offensive or not to your liking please don't flame. You were warned and chose to read on anyway. Thank you.
A/N So for some reason it's a Meat Loaf day so I dedicate this chapter to 'Cry Over Me'. It's as simple as this. I have nothing to read! Why don't authors update like they used to T-T. I know I'm one of those authors…and that thought… It's depressing. But it has given me plenty of time to write. And I do enjoy writing. And I hope you do enjoy reading it. I have some faithful and I try to update for them. Sometimes. Other times I just get this insane urge to write… or just plain boredom… I can't decide yet… Allons-y!
Harry slammed his fists into the mattress on either side of him, falling pack against the pillow he took a deep breath.
Damn that was hot. No! No thinking that! Frustrated he ran both hands through the long hair and sat back up, placing his elbows on his knees; knuckles against his forehead.
Well it was hot. He hated that from the first night and he had started dreaming of the man. But it hurt thinking that the man cared not for anything about him. He cared only for his cover, the mask he hides behind. His wall and comforts. His ideals. He only cared for himself. He clenched his hands tightly. He only cared for himself.
That is wrong and you know it. He has been protecting me since I came here. He healed me when I believed him in the wrong. Even his portrait said he was fond of me. And he seemed worried when it seemed I had run off.
Yet…
That man has always tormented him. After what Snape had witness he had still did what he did in the office. He knew that my home life was shit, yet he always sneered down at me like I was the scum of the earth, the dirt on his shoe. He always said things that he knew would hurt.
He flung the sheet aside and walked to the bathroom, he had a problem to get rid of and he would be damned if he took care of it any other way then with a ice cold shower.
He tried to ignore the memory Snape right outside the wards but it seemed some part of him needed him to remember.
When he stopped resisting he felt the older man's breath on his neck. He breathed in his scent and his body relaxed. Snape sighed and just held him. For a few minutes they stoop like that before Snape sighed and Harry felt his head rest on his shoulder.
Harry laid his forehead against the cool tile trying to refuse the memory.
"Harry I'm sorry." The arms tightened around him. And he held his breath. "I was wrong to say what I did to act the way I did. It was wrong of me to…and you were right." The hands holding him turned him around and Snape scanned his face. Looking for some sort of emotion. "I have not given any indication that I deserve your respect. I have treated you horribly in the past and accused you of being something you aren't." Harry held his breath as the man looked at him. Ever part of him was screaming to relax into this man's arms, to let him hold him but his heart and mind told him to run from the pain. Hide. Get away. Snape used one hand to lift his chin making eye contacted. "Harry you are nothing like James Potter. It took me years to realize this and I'm sorry. You are nothing like Lily Evens." Harry pulled his face from the man's grip and looked away." Snape forced him to look again. "That is because you are you. Harry. You have your fathers' features and your mothers' eyes. His natural flight and her temper. But you are not defined by these. Because yes you are their son but you are so much more." Harry barely noticed when Snapes other hand left his side and came to rest on his cheek. He couldn't look away from the eyes boring into his. Snape rested his forehead against his. "Please don't go."
A tear fell down his face, mingling with the water already falling there.
Snapes POV
Severus lay in his bed. He had woken from the dream and had just stared at the ceiling above him. This was not the first time he had dreamed about Harry. He doubted it would be the last. But this time was different. Maybe it was just that Harry was closer and it was making it more intense.
They had been more frequent since the night in the forest. It was that night when he kissed the younger man that he accepted it. Harry Potter was his One. His mate. He let out a breath as he raised his hand into his line of sight. He stretched it towards the ceiling. The pale wrinkled skin smoothed into ivory. He clenched his fist.
It had been a week since the younger man had returned to Hogwarts. And every time Severus thought he could talk to the younger man he would be left in the dust. He was unsure how to get Harry's attention.
You must first accept yourself.
He slammed his fist into the mattress. Climbing off the bed he changed into his teaching robes and left his rooms. It was no use to mope in there. No use to think of what he could not have.
In his anger he did not reapply his glamour. He made his way up to the seventh floor; the astronomy tower. Climbing the steps as swiftly as he could, he unaware of the people that followed behind him. He stepped into the moonlight and breathed in the crisp night air.
"My My Severus that is a look you have not shown in a while."
He spun around and pointed his wand at his old friend and godson. "What do you think you are doing?"
"Just seeing an old friend. I did not expect to see you glamour gone though. Are you interested in taking up Harry?"
He turned back around ignoring the gaping look his godson was giving him. "No. Draco your impersonation of a fish is unbecoming." He snapped. He went to apply the glamour but was stopped when Draco grabbed his hand. His ebony eyes met the blazing grey ones.
"What do you mean no! It is what he wants…" he pulled his hand away.
"If it is truly what he wants he would not be avoiding me at every turn." He hissed. Lucius raised his hands in a calming manner.
"That is bullshit and you know it Uncle Severus!"
He spun around and looked at Draco. "You will not speak to me that way." He whispered. But Draco did not back down.
"I have never seen you this way Uncle. But this is who you are. And Harry knows that. This…" he poked the black clad vampire in the chest. "Is what he wants to see. That man I grew up knowing was never a coward but if you continue to hide behind these masks and glamour's I begin to see that the man always was." He grabbed Draco by the collar.
"I am not a coward." He snarled. His canines obvious in the pale light.
"Prove it! The Severus Snape I knew was a tall and foreboding man. He never flinched he never backed down. But here you are hiding behind an image to protect yourself when you are only hurting yourself and those around you." He pushed the younger man away and looked away. "If that isn't cowardice I don't know what is." His head snapped back to his godson.
"You will cease to call me that. I have done more to protect your hide and everybody else's than you can imagine. I once was a death eater by choice and I will not hesitate to use that knowledge against you. Family or no. I have seen and done more than your fragile mind could comprehend and I will not sit here and listen to you mock me."
He pushed past his friend and was heading towards the door when he spoke for the first time since entering the tower.
"Severus, Harry knows all that. And he is not ashamed that his One is that way. But he does not want to hide. How long are you going to continue this path? He will not be there long. When the time comes he will leave and you will lose him. I beg of you. Please consider this."
Severus turned his head minutely and looked back over the grounds. The sun was starting to peak above the trees, which meant that breakfast would soon be served. He looked at the pleading eyes and waited.
"He has already accepted you. If he had not he would not have publicly challenged you. He is just waiting for you to stop hiding behind an image that is not real. He wishes to see the real you. He knows he does not know the real you but he wishes to. Can you fault him for that? Are you going to leave him to continue to hang? He has taken the step to you but you have not even attempted the move that small distance between you." the blonde walked past him towards the stairs. "Too much longer and he will be gone. I do not think I could see that for either of you."
And he left. He looked at his godson and raised his brow encouraging him to speak once more. The blonde snorted before walking past him.
"I am not supposed to be telling anyone. But Harry is going to have a visitor today. And you will not like who it is. I suggest you step up before someone else does."
The younger man too disappeared down the stairs. Severus slammed his fist into the wall; the stone crumbling slightly under the impact. He growled to himself as he took in both their words. He flicked his wand and reapplied the Glamour. He never had Harry to lose him.
But the thought made anger and sadness boil through his veins. It was an empty feeling. Worse than the last 3 years. Could he really lose him permanently? His head fell against the stone.
He didn't want to lose him.
Again he looked at his hand. The glamour stayed and he scowled as he made his way to the great hall.
Harry's POV (I almost considered ending it here. But *shrugs* it will a long chapter. Smiles everyone!)
Harry sighed as the door closed behind him. The guardian gave him a farewell as he started to slowly walk the path to the great hall. It was when he entered the main hall he sensed someone watching him. Per habit he guessed it was Severus and almost shrugged it off. He had been trying to talk to him the past week. And Harry just was not ready to confront him. No matter how much he thought he was.
The first night he had dreamed of the night he left. It started in the forest with the kiss and Severus pleading with him not to leave but eventually it morphed into the confrontation in the office, then into the night before that with his uncle. With those memories fresh on his mind he was avoiding the man. The emotions were still fresh. Even three years later and he still remembered every angry word. Every sorrowful word also. It was why he almost ignored the presence.
Almost.
This person was not Severus and it put him on edge. He pushed his hands into his pockets as he pulled his tongue ring through his lips. He pushed his magic out to find the presence of the one watching him as he walked slowly towards the great hall doors. The person was against the wall behind the pillar. And they felt oddly familiar. They were not going to attack him that he could tell, they were waiting and observing. He reached his hand out to the door and pushed on it. It opened easily but it was when the hall turned to look at him that the person made themselves known.
By wrapping their arms around his waist and pulling him flush against the broad chest.
"Well Harry I was sent to check on you and here I find you alone." The man smirked into his hair as the hall went silent. "And what is this? You have not been claimed yet." Harry groaned as the taller man pushed him into the room. Of course they felt familiar. But why were they here. "What happened to your supposed one? Hmmm. It seems he is hiding. Now what shall we do with this information Master Hadrian Jamie Potter Black?"
Harry pulled himself from the arms and punched Carle in the arm. He straightened as the auburn man rubbed it with a pout.
"Master Damitris Carle what is it you think you are doing?"
He raised his hands and shrugged his fangs peaking past his wide smile. "Just greeting an old friend. Is that a crime now Lord?"
Harry looked around at the hall, all the students gaped in their direction, most of the teachers looked on in suspicion, and Minerva however was smirking. The Malfoy's looked confused except Draco and Lucius. Draco looked at the man two seats over and smirked. Lucius looked sad for a moment before standing and walking down the steps. Harry took a peak under his lashes at the one man that mattered and almost gasped at the dark look that was being sent at Carle. He hoped there would not be a duel here. It would end badly. No matter which side won.
Lucius came forward as Damitris put his arm around his shoulder and drew him closer. He brought his lips close to his ear to speak softly. "The vampire in the glamour, he is your one? He will lose if he doesn't come out of hiding soon. Remember by your birthday Harry." Lucius bowed as he reached them, Harry glanced again at Severus. His fingers were white around the glass he was holding as Narcissa whispered urgently to him.
I know, only a little under a year until his 21st. That was the deadline, if Severus did not make the choice, the Marius family would. Harry smiled sadly. And Severus did not want to make that choice.
"My name is Lucius Malfoy. I am part of Lord Black's family, as part of that family I would ask for introductions before you accost him further."
Carle separated from him and bowed dramatically. "Greetings Lord Malfoy. I hail from the Marius Family. My name is Damitris Albarstre Carle (Dah-Me-Trees, Al-Bar- Streh, Car- leh). I was a teacher of Lord Black until he finished his three year apprenticeship in late July. I have been sent by my born Charlemagne Marius to check on his charge." He straightened up and brushed his shoulder length auburn hair to the side. His long nails skimming the tribal tattoo on his left brow. Lucius bowed again.
"If it isn't too rude I think that you should join us for breakfast in our or our Lords quarters. Harry?"
Harry put a little space in between him and Carle and nodded. "I do not believe this is the proper setting for this meeting." He turned his family, avidly ignoring the dark gaze. "Bella, Narcissa, Draco, if it is not too much trouble would you please accompany me and my guest to my rooms?" the three stood and said their good byes to the staff. Severus stood too and walked swiftly down the steps towards them. Draco looked pleased with this. But Harry stepped in front of him speaking to him for the first time since he returned.
"Severus don't." Said man looked down at him sharply. His dark eyes narrowing. He leaned down as he grasped his arm tightly.
"I will not allow him to be here if he is going to stake claim like this. Not in MY territory." The man growled. Harry flushed from the close contact but also in anger. He grabbed the man's hand and pulled it slowly from his arm.
"Severus it is your choice. And time is running out. I cannot wait for you." He took a deep breath; his eyes flashing dangerously. "I will not wait for you to decide you want this. You know the conditions. But please do not cause anything." He turned to follow his family and caught the smirk on Carle's face. He scowled at the other man. He felt a building of magic behind him and quickly turned pointing his wand straight at Severus. "Please. I will have to protect a member of my Family." Please understand what I am trying to tell you.
The eyes widened a bit before he slipped his wand back in his sleeve. He turned again but not before noticing the sad look in the black eyes.
He scowled at the other man as he slung his arm around his shoulder again. "Harry you are going to have to show me around. I will be here a while you know." He stopped suddenly and turned his brown eyes to meet the black ones. "And when the Born of this territory comes out I will have to meet with him formally."
Harry just nodded. He refused to look back. Not now. Not when he had made it clear that if Severus would not accept it he would choose his Family.
Once they made it to the rooms Carle released him and bowed to him. "I apologize Master Hadrian Jamie Potter Black for my abrupt appearance and my rudeness. Originally it was not my intention to introduce myself in that way but seeing that you were not marked yet surprised me. I had to force yours to make a move."
Harry looked at him a moment before calmly sitting down, laying his wand on the arm. Bella sat at his side. Over the last week they, and the whole family, had gotten closer. She gave him an encouraging look.
"Master Carle, am I to understand Born Marius has sent you to check on my progress?" Carle stood understanding that they would discuss that later.
"Yes. My orders were to meet with the family and to check on you. As his charge you know he has a special interest in you." He sat across from him at the gesture Harry made.
Lucius, Narcissa and Draco sat on the couch next to himself and Bella. Harry ran a hand through his hair. "Charlemagne has had an interest in me for a while."
"You know he sees you as his childe and is only looking out for you."
Harry sighed and called a house elf, ordering some tea and a light breakfast. He stood and opened a cabinet, pulling out a special glass for himself. He filled it with a deep red liquid. "I know. He is putting pressure on our arrangement though." He sat again. As they had during the week, his family gave a look at the glass before the elf appeared and gave them their tea.
Lucius chose this moment to speak. "I apologize for interrupting, but what arrangement are you speaking of?" He took a sip of his tea before giving Harry a look over the rim.
Carle looked at him, giving a pointed look at the glass. "You have not told your family?"
Harry took a deep gulp and placed the intricate goblet on the table top. He spun it in under his fingertips carefully as he thought of how to word this. "No I have not." He sat up and took a deep breath. "When I first met Charlemagne he wanted to immediately change me as it was uncommon for humans to be trained by them without becoming a part of the family themselves. I agreed that he could change me." Draco took in a sharp breath. Harry closed his eyes. "But when we were going through the ritual things changed."
A dark man stood at the alter with a goblet of his own blood. There was a dagger sitting next to his hand. The rest of the family surrounded the two as they began the ritual.
Charlemagne was a dark skinned Born. He had long dark hair pulled back into a high braid. His blue eyes smiled at Harry as he looked around nervously. He gestured for him to step forward. "Harry James Potter Black, you are here by rite of apprenticeship. As a prerequisite you have agreed to shed your mortal skin and join this family as my childe." Harry nodded as he was handed the goblet. "This is the blood of the Marius family. The ritual is as follows. You will ingest the blood and I will drink from the cut I make at your wrist. Are you ready Harry?" Again Harry nodded. The man smiled and gestured at the goblet. Harry looked at the thick liquid a moment before swallowing it quickly. The vampire grabbed his wrist in one hand and the dagger in the other he brought the wrist to his mouth and inhaled deeply. But immediately stepped back.
"You have a One?" Harry looked at him in question before the taller man grabbed his wrist and brought it again to his nose. "You have met your One." He breathed quietly. "But have not been marked." The family muttered to themselves. "Harry have you met another vampire before us?"
Harry almost shook his head before remembering the conversation between his two professors a month ago. "I am not sure."
"Did they say anything about a calling?" He nodded. The man closed his eyes before taking the goblet and setting in down on the alter. He grabbed Harrys hand in his and brought it to his lips. "We will train you without the change Harry. I should have looked for this… because of this I apologize Lord Black. But you must know that because you have drank the blood you will have to be changed eventually. The blood acts as a slow poison to a mortal if they are not changed immediately."
Harry shook his head. "Then complete the change."
The vampire sighed. "I cannot. Only your One can. I can only change you if he chooses to refuse the bond. I can only fix our misdeed if he does not."
Harry thought back to the conversation, the dark man that was his 'One'. He felt tears form in his eyes. "He will not want me. He even said he could not have me."
The family stood in silence as the two thought. The older man spoke softly. "The poison will start to affect you in 3 years, about the end of your apprenticeship. After that you will have about a year before it kills you. If he has not accepted you before your date of birth a year after you have finished I will change you. I cannot allow one such as you to die." Harry nodded.
"But the poison will work slower if you continue to ingest the blood. Sometimes it will change the poisoned one into a half blood. You will gain some characteristics. Even though you have not completed the change this will allow you to complete your training." Again Harry nodded. The information clouding his head. "Harry this is not common in our race. And it is often considered 'illegal' as you humans call it. You cannot inform anyone except those who will be helping you. Your family. And if your one accepts you he will know immediately by your smell when you complete your bond." Harry blushed brightly.
Harry picked the glass back up, he brought it to his lips again but Draco slapped the glass from his hand sending it to the floor.
"Why do you continue to drink that? If it is poisoning you why don't you stop?"
Harry sighed and looked at the fireplace. "I must. It is the only thing keeping me alive until my birthday."
Carle looked at the blonde sadly. "It was a grave mistake that we made but it will be fixed so long as this Severus chooses to acknowledge the bond that they share."
Harry growled before standing. "He knows what he must do, but he refuses!"
Lucius sat in thought. "I talked to him this morning about him needing to truly consider his actions. He seemed… stubborn as he always has been. But this changes things. If you told him…" Bella snorted.
They all looked at the woman. "Then he will do it out of necessity. Not out of want. He will only complete the bond to save Harry not because he cares." Harry looked at the woman surprised. He did not think she had understood his reasons as she had. He nodded.
"I need Severus to want this. It is the only way. But he refuse to do it any other way."
Draco stood angrily. "My godfather will not pull his head out of his ass that soon." Narcissa covered her mouth. "He refuses to listen to us. I knew you were going to be visited, I warned him. And he doesn't even seem fazed. He is already under the impression that it is you who will not accept him. That he has already lost. And if we know this… please! Please just go through with the change! I can't lose the closest thing to a brother I have!" Draco stood with his fists clenched. Angry tears running down his face.
Harry continues to stare at the burning fire. Watching as the flames danced to and fro; as they flickered and caused the shadows to dance away before running back. He sighed as Draco's words washed over him. A lump forming in his throat.
"I cannot." Carle looked on in sadness as the young blonde stormed from the room, the father trying to follow.
(Again I thought about stopping here… but I cannot. For some strange reason something is calling to continue to write. I warn you though… the chapter following this one may be as short as the last. XP)
He turned to the man he had grown to admire over the last three years. His long ebony hair was loose this morning; lying delicately over his left shoulder. He had the silver ball between his teeth again as he stared in to the flames. His green eyes seemed dull now that the conversation was over. He looked down at the spilled blood. He waved his wand as he looked towards the two women. They looked at their Lord in worry. The news truly disturbing them. He stood.
"Harry I need to go into the forest. I will be back shortly." The man nodded. He left the room and made his way towards the exit fully aware of the presence following him.
He sighed as he recalled the conversation. His Family was truly sad about the events that took place surrounding the Potter child. But at the time they had no reason to suspect that he would have already met his one. Let alone been intimate with him even if only a little bit. It was enough that no one could change him unless he was rejected.
He stepped into the cool morning and made his way to the forest. The slight crunching of the grass under his feet echoed into the silent grounds. A slight echo answered his as they walked into the forest. They followed him for about five minutes before they both stopped.
He turned and faced the man from earlier. The dark eyes boring into his. He bowed his head as he rested his back against the tree behind him. As he watched the man, the glamour fell slowly and his eyes widened. It seemed that almost 20 years melted off of him. The dark eyes did not change but the deathly pale skin smoothed out into a flawless ivory. The aristocratic face inspected him almost critically. The black shoulder length hair fell to his back as he gained a couple inches standing above him. His slim brow rose as he pointed a slim black nailed finger at him.
"As Born I request that you introduce before setting foot back into my territory. Or approaching my One again." The smooth voice melted any ire Damitris had. It commanded him, made him bend to his will. It was the voice of an old Family. One thought dead.
"My name is Damitris Carle. I am here on business for my Born Charlemagne Marius."
The man glared. "And that business includes my One?"
They stared at each other for a moment before Damitris answered with his own question. "And who are you? You who hide behind glamour like a coward." The man growled and moved swiftly to stand in front of him.
"I am Severus Tobias Salazar Slytherin Snape. I am the remaining member of the Slytherin Family. I am a former death eater and I will not hesitate to curse you before you could think about it. I am Master Severus Snape. Master of Potions, Dark Arts, Defense, and a master in the old ways as taught to me from my grandfather. I am the Born of this territory and I will not allow you to come here and take that which is mine away from me. And by mine I mine my One. I am the mate of Lord Black, and you will not touch him." The dark eyes glinted angrily. Damitris stared at the man for a moment before nodding his head.
"Then you need to show this to the world. Why are you afraid to show this part of you? This is what Harry wants. This is all you need to do. Why do you hesitate?" Severus Snape snarled at him.
"After the display today I can guarantee that the glamour will remain gone. Harry is mine. And if showing myself to the world keeps those who would claim him away then so be it. Unless you are here on actual business I suggest you leave." Damitris sighed.
"Master Snape, tread carefully. I am here as a friend of Harry's, my Born sees him as his childe. I am here only to support and check up on him. But may I speak frankly?"
Severus stepped back and took a deep breath through his nose, then nodded. "Harry requested what he did because he wants you to prove you care. Not because of necessity. He does not wish to hide. And by his 21st he must be changed." The man's nostrils flared angrily. "I cannot tell you why. Harry must explain that to you. I am not here to claim him." He held his hands up. "I speak to you truthfully. And I ask you, do you care for Hadrian Jamie Potter Black?"
Then dark man was silent a moment before looking back towards the barely visible castle towers. "I have always cared for him." He finally whispered.
A/N well… so what do you think. It is a lot to take in, and I'm not sure if I should allow Sev to get off that easy, then again he has suffered for three years. And Harry… so give my opinions, thoughts, anything really. Just review k? so I gave you some more insight on the workings of the vampire culture. I tried to keep to character as it has been a while since I started writing this and I have started other fics where the characters have a different standing. So really I need feedback. Well I'm done for tonight. TTFN