As the haunting musical score and closing credits of the movie began to run, Carlisle made up his mind. He knew all along that he would have to ask Esme to do this for him, but finding the courage to speak the words was still extremely difficult. He felt uncharacteristically nervous at the prospect which had a least one of his children on his guard. Carlisle had noticed the glances that he received from Jasper over the course of the evening and continually tried to mask his emotions, but to no real avail. The unflappable patriarch who had always been the picture of grace under pressure simply could not keep his jittering nerves in check.

Carlisle Cullen, you must be insane to even think such a thing, let alone ask this of your softhearted gentle mate. What if she can't emotionally handle the stress of what you are suggesting? What if you can't deal with it yourself? Once you set your feet on this path there is no turning back. You have to see it through. Are you really ready for that?

"So, what do we want to watch now?" Alice bounced over toward the DVD player and popped the movie out before rifling through the stack of movies.

"I vote for Dread," Jasper suggested to his mate a bit distractedly as he eyed his father with uncertainty. What is making you so jumpy, Carlisle?

"Oh hells to the no. Put on Immortals. Some Greek Gods and sword play action is way more cool than that weak ass horror shit."

"Emmett. Language," Carlisle quietly reprimanded as he ran his fingers through Esme's hair while she snuggled against him on the couch.

Carlisle's massive son gave his father an apologetic smile then ducked his head in slight embarrassment.

"How about A Warrior's Heart?" Alice's tone was hopeful, but the expression on Rosalie's face crushed that idea.

"Not that lacrosse movie. Surely you have something with a bit more of a dramatic flair. How about Cherry Crush?"

Alice crossed her arms as she huffed at her sister. "Just no. No femme fatales tonight and what do you have against lacrosse? It's an exciting sport. Have you even seen the movie? I know that you would like the lead actor. He's hot as hell."

"Lovebug." Jasper drew his frustrated mate's attention. "I don't think the current mood is up to handling that coming of age teen drama thang. We have had quite enough angst of our own for the time being."

"Oh, and what in the hell do you call Dread? If that crap isn't angst, I don't know what is," Emmett challenged.

Esme reached up and stroked her husband's cheek as she heard him sigh. "At least it's no longer a weak ass shit movie," she whispered with a twinkle in her eye that brought a slight smile to Carlisle's face.

"It's a psychological horror thriller, Emmett; not that I expect you to understand that."

"Harry Potter it is," Alice chirped while slipping the disc into the player as her siblings moaned in unison. "What? They are good movies and there is none of this fighting surrounding them, so there. We are supposed to be having a nice relaxing time, guys. What's more relaxing than Harry Potter?"

"Nightmare on Elm Street?" Emmett tried in desperation.

"Nope. Not relaxing; besides are we talking about the original or that new sucky one?" Alice questioned as she hopped back up to rejoin her love in the overstuffed armchair.

"It didn't suck, Alice. The new one actually gave you more background story. It was good."

"Did it have Robert Englund in it?" The little dark haired pixie tilted her head as she eyed her brother.

"Well… no."

"Then it sucked. There is never any reason to mess with perfection and the original was perfect."

"Whatever." Emmy snorted in disgust as he draped his arm over his mate's shoulders.

"Em, please just sit back and enjoy the movie," Esme quietly suggested. "We'll watch your movie next time."

With the film started and his children settling, Carlisle sighed softly then he steeled his nerves. Hugging his wife closer to his chest, he whispered in her ear, "Esme, there is something that I need to talk to you about."

"Carlisle, may I see you in the kitchen for a moment?"

The abrupt voice caused the doctor to look up and find an extremely anxious Edward staring back at him. "Of course, son." Kissing his mate's cheek, he eased her from his lap and excused himself before following his first born out of the room.

Once they were safely alone Edward turned towards his father and hissed quietly, "Are you crazy?"

Taken back by his son's tone, Carlisle found himself struck speechless.

"With all due respect, Dad, you have got to be out of your fucking mind to ask her to do that? I can understand why you think that this is what you need, but have you given any idea as to how it is going to affect Esme?"

Releasing a held breath Carlisle replied sharply in a whisper, "Of course I have, Edward. Do you think this was an easy decision for me? Since you feel the need to be in my head uninvited you should already know that I've been struggling with this. I have run through every option I can think of. It is either ask this of my wife or continue to suffer. Put yourself in my place. Which would you choose?"

"I would suffer before I would ever put my mate through that sort of mental anguish. You can't do that to her. Look if this is what you really want, I'll ..."

"NO!" Carlisle snarled as he bowed up at his son. "Remember your place, Edward and let me remind you that it is neither equal to nor above me." His eyes instantly turned black as a growl rolled in his chest. Stiffly he took a step towards his son as he stretched his body it his full height. "I am the leader of this coven. I have put forth the energy to build and maintain it. I am your sire, boy and you will show me the respect that I am due."

The elder's aggressive posturing caused Edward to lower his eyes immediately and drop to his knee at his father's feet. Quietly he whimpered then closed his eyes as he raised his head to expose his vulnerable throat to Carlisle in an act of utter submission.

With a voice that barely qualified as a whisper, Edward spoke. "Father, please forgive my insolence. Believe me, I never intended to assume a position of power. I was only trying to offer my assistance as your son. Disrespect was never my intention. All I want to do is help."

Carlisle balled his hands into tight fists as his dark gaze roved over his son while he continued to growl dangerously.

For his part, Edward remained as motionless as a statue fearing that any movement would set his father off as the tense seconds ticked away. He tried to decipher the thoughts flying through his leader's head, but very little of the instinctual animalistic musings were readable. The boy flinched without breaking his position when a strong hand landed heavily on his shoulder.

"Stand, Edward. Stand and face me."

Swallowing hard, the younger man opened his eyes, afraid of what he might see, but his fear quickly evaporated. Carlisle stood firm and strong with a tempest still swirling within the depths of his raven hued eyes as he crossed his arms over his chest, but his expression had slightly softened. The patriarch's extraneous breath was slow and deep, clearly focused on producing a calming effect and his agitated growls had dissipated. However, when Edward attempted to probe his father's mind for intent, he found himself deflected by Carlisle's well-honed mental shield.

A shocked gasp from behind him caught the boy's attention. Quickly he glanced over his shoulder to find his mother standing there with Jasper right behind her; his hands on her shoulders protectively. Great. Just what I need; an audience to bear witness to my stupidity and subsequent dressing down.

A shiver ran though Edward that was swiftly eclipsed by the warmth of a placid peaceful feeling. Smoothly rising to his feet, the bronze haired boy gave his brother a slight nod as he breathed a sigh before meeting his father's eyes.

"What is going on in here?"

Edward grimaced at the concern in his mother's voice. He had meant to deter Carlisle from his path in the hopes of saving Esme from that stressful burden only to subject her to more unneeded stress brought on by his actions.

"Edward and I simply got our wires crossed, my love. There is nothing to worry about. The situation has been resolved. It won't happen again, will it Son?" As he softly spoke, Carlisle's eyes never strayed from his son.

"No, Sir. It will not." He swallowed hard as he fought to maintain eye contact with his father.

Carlisle relieved him of that strain as he shifted his focus past Edward to fall on Jasper. "Jazz, I don't know how much you saw or heard, but I trust your discretion. I prefer for this instance not to leave this room. "

"I see no reason why it should, Carlisle. What happened here is between you and Edward; no one else."

Giving his son a slight smile of gratitude he continued quietly. "I would appreciate it if you and Edward would return to the living room. Please continue to enjoy your evening." His eyes drifted between his sons. "I need to have a few words with your mother in private before we rejoin you."

Carlisle sighed when Edward lowered his head in defeat. Placing a knuckle beneath his son's chin, he raised the boy's head. "Edward, you may not believe this right now, but I have heard your objections and do appreciate your candor. Now, I need you to trust me to do what is right for me and for your mother." Cupping his hand behind his son's neck, Carlisle pulled Edward close and whispered in his ear. "She is a much stronger person than you give her credit for being, but if she truly can't go through with my request, I would never force her. All I can do is ask. She is free to say no and if that is her answer, her decision will be respected. She is my life, son. I would never allow, let alone facilitate, harm to come to her. If you don't trust my decisions at least have faith in my love for Esme."

Releasing his son, Carlisle stepped back to see Edward nod slightly before turning to walk away.

Once the boys were safely out of the room, Esme slid up behind her husband and wrapped her arms around his waist as she pressed her cheek against his back. "Are you going to give me an honest answer?"

Butterflies came to life in the pit of Carlisle's stomach at her words. Closing his eyes he crossed his arms covering her hands with his as he swallowed back the venom rising in his throat. "What do you mean, sweetheart? I am always honest with you."

"A lie of omission is still a lie, Carlisle Cullen. You've said the very same thing to our children often enough that I don't think I should have to remind you of that fact." Esme gently admonished as she kissed the side of his neck. "So, I'll ask you again, are you going to give me an honest answer about what was going on in here when Jasper and I walked in; and don't bother telling me that it's nothing to worry about. If it concerns my husband and my baby boy it most certainly is something that I should be concerned with."

He sighed inwardly as he slowly unwound her arms from around him and turned to face his mate. Inhaling deeply, he gazed into her questing pale golden eyes. Tracing the back of his fingers along her cheek he gave her a sad smile before kissing her softly.

"What was that for?"

"Good measure. I'm a little worried that you won't feel much like kissing me for a while after I say what I need to say."

Esme cocked an eyebrow curiously at Carlisle's odd explanation.

"Edward and I disagreed on a point that concerned you; more to the point, it concerned you and I and a request that I have. He disapproves and in doing so he began to make a suggestion that was well out of line. I was compelled to correct him, which gratefully I was able to do without harsh words or deeds." He tried to reassure her with a smile. "See, I told you that it was nothing to worry about."

"What is this request that you wish to make of me?"

"I would rather if we had a bit of privacy before I explain any further. Would you please accompany me for an evening stroll, Mrs. Cullen?" He held out his arm which she took gently and allowed him to lead her out of the house towards the tree line and beyond.

While they walked at a leisurely pace in silence, Esme studied her mate carefully. She could see him debating with himself and began to worry. Carlisle was always so very self-assured that she could only imagine what sort of problem would have this sort of effect on him. Near a rocky outcrop where the river dropped off into a small waterfall she had reached her limit of worst case scenarios and pulled him to a halt.

"Talk to me, Carlisle. You seem so troubled and I want to help you, but you have to confide in me first. Tell me what's wrong."

Releasing his hold on her, he ran both hands through his hair as he bowed his head. "Esme, I don't even know how to begin."

His wife took his hand and led him over towards the rock shelf where she sat, pulling him down with her. "Start with what is bothering you. I have to know what the problem is before I can help fix it."

"I'm…" He shook his head then let his gaze focus on the crescent moon reflected in the dark water. "I am troubled and I can't seem to resolve the issues that are plaguing me on my own."

"You don't have to resolve them yourself. With our family, you never have to struggle on your own, Carlisle. Any of the children would be happy …."

"No, Esme, I can't accept help from the children. Not with this. That is why Edward and I argued. He didn't want you to be bothered with my torment so he offered to help, but I can't allow that. I wish that I could, but I just can't. You don't understand."

The timbre of his voice rose as his anxiety grew. Esme ran her fingers along his temple as she cooed to him softly. "It's alright, love. We will face this together. Shh. If you say that the children can't help, that's fine, they don't have to. I'm here for you. Edward was being ridiculous if he thought that your needs would ever be a bother to me. If they can't help I most certainly will, but you have to let me in so I can know what I am dealing with. What can I do, darling?"

Carlisle withdrew from her touch and dropped his head in his hands for a few moments before raking his fingers through his hair and lifting his head back up to face his adoring wife with a heavy sigh.

"Oh, Carlisle," Esme whispered and took his hand in hers when she noticed venom tears coating his eyes. "Talk to me, love. I can't stand to see you suffering like this."

He gave her a small smile as the irony of her statement hit him. Taking a deep breath he found his courage and his voice. "I am suffering, Esme. Logically I know that there is no reason for me to feel as I do, but there are things that the brain just can't overcome on its own. Obviously, I've tried to reason with myself to no avail. I have tried to ignore my distress hoping that putting it out of my mind would drive it away, but it comes back with a vengeance. I've been able to distract myself for short spans of time, but I need to resolve the situation if I'm ever going to be free."

"What are you talking about, Carlisle? What situation?"

His breath caught in his chest as he lowered his head slightly but continued to gaze up into her worried loving eyes. He squeezed her hand lightly and swallowed hard before speaking softly, a slight waver in his tone.

"I cannot get past the guilt for what I have done to my son; for what I could have done to my family. I am blessed to call the remarkable individuals who surround me every day my family. Their willingness to forgive is the only reason this coven still remains intact. I don't feel that I deserve that, Esme."

She started to speak but another gentle squeeze to her hand quieted her and allowed him to continue.

"I have never questioned their love or devotion and return it in kind. In that vein I do know that I can justify their forgiveness for my transgression, because I offer no less in light of their mistakes." He closed his eyes for a few seconds as he struggled with his words. When he reopened them there was a determination in their depths that had been lacking moments before. "But, there is a difference. They are held accountable for their misdeeds where I am not. My children are able repent and be offered absolution so they can walk away with a clear conscience. This is not an option for me, Esme. My conscience remains troubled and there is no atonement for my sins. I have forgiveness, but I don't feel that it was earned and therefore am having a difficult time accepting it.

You asked me why I thought that I was better than my children and my response was that I didn't think that way at all. I was truthful in saying that. My position is higher, but I am no better. I should be held accountable to the same rules of conduct and suffer the same consequences for breaking those rules."

Even though she could feel the seriousness in his words, Esme found herself unable to suppress a smile. "So you want me to punish you like an errant boy, Carlisle? You broke the rules and fought with Jasper so you need to be grounded? Work, hunting and home for a month, young man." Her eyes sparkled as she tried to force him to see the humor in his request. "Oh, and give me your car keys. You won't be needing them. I'll drive you where you are allowed to go."

She reached out her free hand to stroke his cheek gently as she reeled in her amusement and grew serious in response to his pain. "If you require chastisement in order to let go of this remorse, sweetheart, I am willing to do what I can. I'm sure that I can find some dreaded chores for you to do during your confinement. Something that will allow you to work off your penance without being overly obvious to the children. Will that suffice, my love?" She gave him a quizzical look as she smiled gently.

He shook his head as his breath escaped in a soft sigh. "No, sweetheart, I'm afraid that wouldn't be fair. The same offense should carry the same punishment. Jasper was not grounded for his crime."

Slowly the light smile faded to be replaced by an expression of shock as the true gravity of her husband's request hit her. "Carlisle. No. You can't be suggesting…" She pulled back and stared at him as her mind refused to accept even the thought of acting against her husband in such a way. "You can't be serious, love."

He nodded while swallowing back the lump that formed in his throat. "Esme, my dearest heart, I need to experience physical pain if I am ever going to be able to purge my conscience." He took a deep breath then held it for a moment before quickly blurting out, "Esme, as my equal and partner you are the only one I can ask. I regret that I am not strong enough to find another way. I need to be whipped like I whipped my boy and you are the only means to my salvation."

AN: Esme is in a state of shock. *nods* I get the feeling that she and Carlisle are going to make the next chapter difficult for me.

Just in case it's not obvious, the variety of movies suggested have the various actors in them. ...and I'm with Alice. I think the lead in A Warrior's Heart is hot and Rose would certainly enjoy watching him. ;-) Movie night was just a way for me to entertain myself as I gained my own courage to tackle the coming event. Hope it wasn't too distracting.

Thanks for everything, guys! Y'all just continue to be top shelf. There is just no better group of folks out there than y'all. Thanks goes out to Splinter for making my job easier; now if I can just find a way to return the favor.