Definitely a heavy chapter…you were warned. It was hard to write this. But I think this a serious issue and one that's hardly addressed.
Enjoy!
Blown Away, Carrie Underwood
She Will Be Loved, Maroon 5
Cry, Alexx Calise
Daughters, John Mayer
01x10: Daughters
McKinley was out of school. There was a flood and tornado warning for all of the Lima area. Hannah watched as the grey clouds formed in the sky. Dry lightning flickered and she jumped slightly. She closed her eyes as the rain began to sprinkle, then pour. Mid November weather wasn't her favorite. Most certainly not.
She heard the door slam and loud laughter rang out across the house. The sixteen year old quickly closed her blinds and her door. She turned on her iPod, plugged safely into her iPod dock, and began to play music at the highest volume. She could still hear the beating, pounding sound of the rain on the tin roof of the house she didn't call home. She winced as she made out the sound of a bottle breaking. She waited for the silence.
Hannah turned on her TV, keeping an eye on the weather. She watched as the suit clad man predicted that the tornado would hit around 10 pm. She looked at her old pocket watch. It was her father's.
9:00 pm.
She heard the voice, that voice, the one that plagued her nightmares, calling out her name. Hannah slinked down the stairs, making as little noise as possible, in hopes that maybe it was enough. She came to face Greg, her mother's boyfriend. He was on the couch, beer in hand, alcohol rank in his breath as he spat at her, "Get me another one."
She nodded slowly and went to fridge to get a Budweiser. She gave it him and he threw it at her. The bottle broke and the alcohol soaked her outfit. Her favorite sweater, the tribal print one. Ruined. Just like that.
"I wanted the light beer," he slurred, grinning like he was genius.
Hannah nodded. She went to get the light beer. This time he didn't throw it at her, he only popped the cap off and gulped it down. When finished, he spat, "Go fix dinner."
The kitchen window was right above the sink. Dirty dishes were piled up in the sink. Hannah stared as the rain came down. She was silent as she cleaned up the mess that Greg had left.
The rain fell harder and the wind picked up.
She turned on the old, crackling radio and heard a familiar, ironic tune. She smiled grimly and pathetically as she hummed the opening notes, and sang out softly so as not to alert Greg,
"Dry lightning cracks across the skies
Those storm clouds gather in her eyes…"
Thunder cracked. Hannah looked down, singing out,
"Her daddy was a mean old mister
Mama was an angel in the ground
The weather man called for a twister
She prayed blow it down…"
Closing her eyes, she sang, grabbing leftovers from the fridge.
"There's not enough rain in Oklahoma
To wash the sins out of that house
There's not enough wind in Oklahoma
To rip the nails out of the past…"
She sang out tearfully,
"Shatter every window 'til it's all blown away,
Every brick, every board, every slamming door blown away
'til there's nothing left standing,
Nothing left of yesterday
Every tear-soaked whiskey memory blown away,
Blown away!"
She pulled the food out of the microwave to give to Greg, who was passed out on the couch. A storm siren went off in the distance, and Hannah continued to sing, looking down at Greg,
"She heard those sirens screaming out
Her daddy laid there passed out on the couch
She locked herself in the cellar
Listened to the screaming of the wind
Some people called it taking shelter
She called it sweet revenge…"
Thunder cracked once again. Hannah, scared as Greg began to wake up, ran to her room. Leaning against the closed door, she belted out,
"Shatter every window 'til it's all blown away,
Every brick, every board, every slamming door blown away
'til there's nothing left standing,
Nothing left of yesterday
Every tear-soaked whiskey memory blown away,
Blown away!"
She heard loud footsteps coming up the stairs. She knew he was angry. But the reason? She had no idea. Hannah let out a few tears as she sang out, choking up,
"There's not enough rain in Oklahoma
To wash the sins out of that house
There's not enough wind in Oklahoma
To rip the nails out of the past…"
The door was flung open just as the shutters of the house were ripped from it. A tree fell in the backyard and Hannah sang out as Greg shoved her into her dresser,
"Shatter every window 'til it's all blown away
Every brick, every board, every slamming door blown away
'til there's nothing left standing,
Nothing left of yesterday
Every tear-soaked whiskey memory blown away…"
Hannah let out a sob when Greg decided he was done. She sang out softly from the floor, "Blown away, blown away, blown away, blown away…"
"What exactly is Regionals?" Hadleigh asked Lorhin, who was sketching dress ideas in her notepad.
"It's the secondary stage of show choir competition. We compete with other choirs from this region," Lorhin explained, grabbing her bag and following Hadleigh out of the English class. Hadleigh was sporting the latest Louis Vuitton, and she was clutching it to avoid it beign destroyed. This school didn't have much respect for your belongings. Or you, really.
"Oh, well isn't it in like two weeks?" Hadleigh asked confusedly. "Why aren't you guys preparing?"
"We don't really prepare," Lorhin smiled. "We improvise."
"That's the single most idiotic thing I've heard all day," Hadleigh said haughtily. She looked immensely overdressed in her beige wedges, dark colored skinnies, and large blousy teal button up. The white Louis Vuitton just made her look richer. "Seriously," she continued. "You guys need to make some kind of plan! What about the set list? What about choreography?"
"We wing it," Lorhin grinned, prancing into Glee club. Hadleigh huffed in behind her.
Mr. Schue was looking expectantly at his Glee club. Hannah was absent, but he expected that she'd come in late like always.
"So…any ideas for Regionals?"
"We've been over this Mr. Schue," Jordana pointed out. "We don't have any ideas."
"I have our outfits designed though!" Lorhin smiled, hopping up. "I was thinking a classy LBD with red pumps and silver earrings. It's chic and gorgeous, plus sequins will look totally great with the stage lighting."
"Maybe we could do some Eminem," Theo pointed out. "We'd get major creativity points."
"No, I think we should sing something by Hunter Hayes," Bailey smiled. "It's so cute and romantic, the judges would love it!"
"Country would be fun," Dawn suggested. "Maybe with cowboy boots?"
"Guys, guys!" Mr. Schue called out. Everyone became quiet. "Your assignment this week is to come up with something, anything, that you think could be good for Regionals. Any ideas are welcome!"
Hadleigh stood up, "I think we should have a set list party this Friday night. My house is unavailable that night, but can any of you guys volunteer your house?"
Neal said, "My parents won't want me to have a party. But I can ask Hannah, her mom is hardly ever home."
"Great!" Hadleigh grinned. "Everyone, show up at Hannah's house at 8 pm Friday night. See you guys there!"
Neal dialed Hannah's number carefully, and said, "Hey!" when she answered.
"Hey," she answered. "You usually don't call right after school…" she trailed off awkwardly. "You don't call at all, really."
"Well," Neal started, "I was wondering if the Glee kids could hang out at your house Friday night. Just for a few hours."
Hannah was quiet, but she said, "Yeah, that's cool. My mom's going out with a friend to get a few drinks at the bar, and she won't be back till midnight. That sounds like fun. I'll see you all then."
Neal said, "We'll be there at eight, if that's okay…"
"It's fine," Hannah monotoned. "See you then."
She hung up and Neal forgot to ask why she wasn't at school that day.
"Welcome to my humble abode," Hannah said. It was an overstatement. She didn't have the nicest house…in fact, the Glee kids were scared to park at night in the neighborhood. Neal looked around and smiled.
She bit her lip awkwardly. She knew they were judging her. She couldn't help that her mom was off the deep end, jobless, and her boyfriend was an alcoholic who could barely pay the bills. "Anyway…" she said. "We can move to my room."
All eleven other members of the Glee club moved down the narrow hallway to Hannah's room. It was much nicer. Thick, heavy rugs covered the cheaply tiled floor almost completely. Large pieces of fabric were draped across the walls, most likely hiding cracks and stains. Her furniture looked worn. She sat on her bed, and some of the girls climbed on with her. Some chose to sit on the floor.
It was awkward.
"So I was thinking," Dawn began, "that we could open with a killer ballad, then transition into a cool vocal number. With dancing of course."
"Well, that sounds good," Cortney agreed. "But the whole point of organizing this party is to figure exactly what songs to perform. That didn't get us anywhere."
Dawn kind of slumped and Lorhin threw an arm around her, glaring at Cortney. Cortney simply raised her eyebrows. Lorhin said out loud, "Let's think positively. What good songs are on the radio now?"
The next hour consisted of various ideas being thrown out, but nothing really got decided on. Hannah checked her pocket watch consistently, biting her lip and glancing at the open door.
"You guys hungry?" She asked suddenly.
Theo groaned and said, "Yes, I'm starving!"
"I'll go get some chips or something," she said. As soon as she left the room, her knee high boots (paired with short shorts and a baggy sweater) patted down the creaking hallway. The sound of gravel flying at the house reached the Gleeks ears, but they didn't think anything of it. The soft sound of rain began to hit the roof.
"It sure has been raining a lot lately," James pointed out, staring out Hannah's window, the only one noticing the headlights pulling into the gravel driveway. He didn't think anything of it.
"Yeah, I guess it's just that time of year, maybe?" Lorhin guessed, looking to where Hadleigh was scanning Hannah's bookshelf. The house was silent. They couldn't even hear Hannah. They did, however, hear a door open, and then slam.
Neal stood, getting bad vibes from this. "Guys…" he began, but then heard the sound of a bottle breaking.
"Pick that up," a gruff voice said roughly. "You lazy, worthless thing. You aren't good for anything, really. You only care about yourself, no, you won't help out your own family." Neal's eyes widened and he paled. Theo was standing, and the girls were looking around fearfully.
"Theo, find a backdoor and get the girls out of here," Neal said through gritted teeth, listening as the unknown man began yelling obscenities directed towards Hannah.
"No," Lorhin said softly and shakily. "We won't leave."
Neal stepped out of Hannah's room, and walked down the creaking hallway. He had to get in there. Or at least see what was happening. Theo and the Glee club followed, terrified.
Hannah was sitting at the kitchen table, trying to piece back together what seemed to be a picture frame of some sort. Tears were threatening to spill.
The man, with a wife beater and beer gut and grey stubble, looked at Neal and screamed, "Hannah, who is this?"
"It's Neal," she said thickly. "He's just leaving…"
"Is there anyone else here?" The man demanded.
"Yes…" Hannah said softy.
"How dare you invite people into my house without me knowing!" The man said, knocking Hannah out of her chair. She hit the floor with a loud smack. Neal stood, frozen. Hannah met his eyes, and he knew what she was trying to say. Leave. Get out of here. But Neal felt like his feet were stuck to the floor.
"You are so disrespectful," he said, kicking her hard in the side. Hannah gasped out for air. The man grabbed her arm and yanked her up. Neal looked to where the Glee club was congregated outside of the living room, which was connected to the kitchen. Neal tried to give them warning with his eyes, but the man had already pulled Hannah into the living room, Neal standing horrified and shocked as he took off his belt.
"I want you all to watch," the man slurred, looking towards the terrified Glee club being held back by Theo. Neal felt himself begin to cry as Hannah was hit over, and over, and over. Neal felt his feet become unstuck as he ran over to the man and punched him hard in the face. He reeled backwards and sent Hannah to the floor.
Spencer grabbed her, the red welts on her arms and legs beginning to bleed, and handed her to Oliver and Bailey, who was crying. Dawn was sobbing uncontrollably, and Lorhin was staring on in disbelief. James looked steely and Jordana was letting tears roll down her cheeks.
Neal was beating the shit out the man. He felt Theo, his right hand man join in, and felt a surge of pride when they gave a final punch to the man, who was unconscious. Neal stood and surveyed the scene. His heart broke when he saw Hannah, who was standing.
"Get out," she said brokenly, tears flowing. "Just…leave."
"Hannah-" Neal began, but she shook her head.
"Just leave," she said, plopping on the couch, sobbing her eyes out. The Glee club members did as she wished. The only ones who remained were Hadleigh, Lorhin, Cortney, Theo, and Spencer, who was searching for some first aid.
"Why didn't you tell us?" Neal asked sadly.
"It never came up," Hannah said cynically, choking back sobs. "I thought I said leave."
"You did," Lorhin said, tear stains on her pretty face. Hannah looked at her, then at Hadleigh.
"Well, you can go now," Hannah said rudely, pointing to the door. Hadleigh rushed out of Hannah's house sobbing. Cortney walked somberly out. Theo dragged the man into the hallway, then shoved him into one of the rooms and walked back into the living room.
"You need to tell someone," Theo said quietly.
"Like who?" Hannah muttered darkly. "Who would care?"
"We do!" Lorhin cried out.
"You're staying at my house tonight," Neal said finally.
"Get out!" Hannah sobbed. Neal took one last look at her before opening the door to leave.
"Leaving isn't a good idea," Lorhin said. Spencer nodded.
"I know, it's why I'm staying," Neal said, plopping on the porch, the rain slowing up a bit. "I'll be fine."
"If you say so…" Spencer said, leading Lorhin to his car. The only car left was Theo's and Hadleigh's.
"She really needs to be loved," Theo said.
"She will be," Neal said from the porch.
Theo ran to Hadleigh's car, noticing she was still there. He knocked on her window. Hadleigh turned on the lights inside the car, and she glared, make up running down her face.
"Let me in?" Theo mouthed.
Hadleigh unlocked the passenger side and he climbed in, soaking wet.
"Why are you still here?" Theo asked.
"I miss my parents," Hadleigh admitted. "Seeing Hannah like that…made me realize how lucky I am."
"I know what you mean," Theo said. There was silence. Theo cleared his throat and sang out,
"Beauty queen of only sixteen
She had some trouble with herself…"
Hadleigh looked to where Theo was sitting in her passenger seat, then to where Neal was. He sang out,
"He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else…"
On the porch, Neal sang out to the rain, leaning against her front door,
"I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more…"
In the car, Theo sang,
"I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved…"
He smiled at her and sang,
"Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore…"
Neal sang out sadly, watching the freezing rain pour down,
"It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along, yeah
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want…"
Neal belted out,
"I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved…"
Unknowingly, Neal and Theo harmonized,
"And she will be loved
And she will be loved…"
Theo sang softly,
"I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are…"
Neal sang,
"I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful…"
Theo and Neal harmonized, in two different locations,
"I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain…"
Neal closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep. Hadleigh sniffled and smiled at Theo, saying, "Thanks. I appreciate it."
"Do you want to stay at my house tonight?" Theo asked, seeing that she was an emotional mess right now. "Platonically of course. Nothing has to happen."
"Thanks," Hadleigh smiled.
Theo hopped out of her car and into his. She followed him to his house, about ten minutes away. Both teens ran into the two-story brick home and Hadleigh grinned. "Can I take a shower?" She asked. "I feel disgusting."
"Sure," Theo said. "Let me show you the towels." However, his phone rang, and he pointed to the hallway. "It's in that hallway," he said before answering.
"Hello?"
"Hey, it's Cortney," she said. "Just making sure you got out okay."
"Yeah I'm fine," he said absentmindedly.
Hadleigh was frustrated. She was so lost! She sighed and yelled out, "Theo, I need you!"
Cortney choked a little. "Who is that?"
"Nobody," Theo said unconvincingly.
"Sure sounds like nobody," Cortney said. "Who is at your house?"
"Nobody. See you Monday, babe," he said, before clicking end.
When Neal awoke, he had a crick in his neck. The driveway was empty. The man's car was gone.
He felt the door behind him open and he looked to see Hannah, looking simple in a pair of sweatpants tucked into boots and a sweatshirt. She sat down silently beside him, watching the snow fall onto her yard.
"First snow of the winter," Hannah said. "It's a little late this year."
"Better late than never," Neal said groggily.
"Hmm," Hannah said. "Why are you here?"
"Because I care about you," Neal said honestly. "And you are too amazing to be treated like that. With you, everything is colorful and real and new and without you it's gray and boring and lonely. You make me feel. And I can't let that go."
"Do you love me?" Hannah asked suddenly.
"Yes," Neal said. "I love you. I would do anything for you."
"Go home, Neal," Hannah said softly. "Get some coffee, take a warm shower. Take care of yourself. On Monday, pretend like nothing ever happened. If you love me, you'll do that." She stood and walked inside.
"Mr. Schue?" Hannah said, walking up to the front of the classroom. She wasn't aware that Neal had called Mr. Schue and explained to him the whole story. Neal didn't want her to know. "Can I sing a song?"
"Yes, of course," Mr. Schue said.
Soft guitars started up and Hannah sang out lowly,
"Well I guess it's been a while
Since I've seen the sunshine
Since I have smiled…"
She gulped and continued to sing.
"And me, who's so well versed
Is feeling so damn empty
Is at a loss for words
Forgot what it's like
To just to feel okay
I'm praying for the day
When there is no more rain…"
She belted out,
"And I don't wanna do anything but cry
Oh, and I don't wanna do anything but cry…"
Hannah closed her eyes and sang,
"Well I hardly feel alive
I'm going through the motions
But I don't feel like trying
The hole in my heart is growing bigger by the day
I wish that I could crawl inside
Hide away…"
She sang out powerfully and meaningfully,
"And I don't wanna do anything but cry
Oh, and I don't wanna do anything but cry!"
She stepped forward a little, singing passionately,
"Oh, I'm so low
I'm almost to the bottom
And oh, nowhere to go
Even my soul has left my body…"
She finished off strong, singing,
"Oh, and I don't wanna do anything but cry
Oh, and I don't wanna do anything but cry
And I don't wanna do anything but cry
And I don't wanna do anything but cry…"
Everyone was in tears.
When Hannah walked into the choir room the next afternoon, she was met with a strange sight. No one was there. She saw a note on top of the piano. PRACTICE IN AUDITORIUM TODAY.
Well, okay. Her long brown skirt and white long sleeved shirt (with an orange scarf) flowed behind her as she walked to the auditorium. There, all of the Glee club was standing on stage, dressed in all white.
Mr. Schue was in the middle playing guitar. Hannah recognized the song.
Neal sang out, "I know a girl, she puts the color inside of my world…"
Theo sang, smiling at Hannah in a white v-neck, "But she's just like a maze, where all of the walls all continually change…
Oliver sang, "And I've done all I can, to stand on her steps with my heart in my hands…"
Cody sang out, "Now I'm starting to see, maybe it's got nothing to do with me..."
The whole Glee club sang simply and purely,
"Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too…"
Lorhin sang out in white wide leg pants and a white blazer, "Oh, you see that skin? It's the same she's been standing in…"
Hadleigh belted out in a white shift dress and cowboy boots, "Since the day she saw him walking away, now she's left cleaning up the mess he made!"
The club sang out,
"So fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too…"
Theo sang out sweetly,
"Boys, you can break
You'll find out how much they can take
Boys will be strong
And boys soldier on
But boys would be gone without the warmth from
A woman's good, good heart…"
Neal belted out to Hannah,
"On behalf of every man
Looking out for every girl
You are the god and the weight of her world…"
Everyone sang out one last time,
"So fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too
So mothers, be good to your daughters too
So mothers, be good to your daughters too…"
Wow. I am emotionally drained. That was tough writing.
***If you or anyone you know is in this situation, TELL SOMEONE. This is a very serious matter!
Did you expect Hannah to have some sort of secret like that?
Review?