Notes: Another long one and boy is it a doozy. I don't want to say too much at the risk of giving things away other than there is another sex scene in this chapter and that it's more graphic than the first one. So you probably don't want to read this in work or school.

You are all going to hate me~

EDIT: Due to thinking about it in hindsight, I've edited a bit of this chapter. It should be worded better now.

"Thor?"

Loki swore his heart stopped and dropped to the floor as he was confronted by one of the absolute last people he ever wanted to see. He felt the color drain from his face and the distinct feeling of fainting dumped over him. For minutes he said nothing, watching as Thor's obvious joy at seeing him was replaced by concern at his brother's lack of speech and that Loki probably looked like he was going to be sick. Loki swallowed thickly, closing his eyes and counting to ten before opening them again only to see that he wasn't actually having a waking nightmare.

"How did you find me?" His voice was strained and he leaned weakly against an empty table. His whole body was trembling from the stress of the situation.

"Loki, maybe you should sit down." Thor worriedly took a few steps towards him but stopped as Loki held out a hand in the halt motion. "I was told by Jane Foster, my girlfriend."

"How did she find out then?" Why did that name sound familiar? Loki stared at Thor's face and let out a groan as he realized the how. "Darcy…of course. I shouldn't have said anything to that woman."

"Please don't think badly of her, Loki, she didn't know." Thor took in Loki's appearance, the longer dark hair, the thinner build, and frowned, "Have you been taking care of yourself? You know mother would be worried if she could see how thin you are now."

Loki snorted derisively and crossed his arms, fixing his eyes on Thor. He shook his head. "Why are you here? I know you didn't show up just to comment on my weight so spare me the lying."

Thor sighed, resigned to the fact that Loki wouldn't take anything he said seriously, "I've missed you; we all do. We haven't heard from you. You ignored my texts, blocked me, you didn't even try to let us know how you were doing. Did Amora tell you anything? We wanted her to speak to you about contacting us. We didn't even know if you were alive or not."

"Clearly I'm alive and now you know. So if you would just excuse me. I should get back to work." Loki went to leave but Thor's hand reached out and grabbed his wrist. Instantly he had flashbacks to Tony doing the same. It was different between these two men, his brother and his lover. "Let go, Thor. People are staring."

"Let them stare. I have every right to speak to my little brother." Thor responded sternly, sending the prying eyes a glare and watching as they quickly averted back to their own business. He let go of Loki's wrist. "If you worry about the public, is there anywhere we can go to speak in private?"

"You aren't going to let this go are you, you stubborn brute? Fine. Meet me in two hours at Central Park. We'll talk there. Though, I can tell you now that you'll be wasting your breath trying to change my mind." Loki warned him tersely as he walked back behind the counter, slamming the flip up blockade as hard as it would allow. "Do you agree to it?"

Thor nodded, smiling hesitantly, "Yes, I do. Thank-you for attempting this."

Loki's return smile was all bared teeth as Thor didn't wait for any more of a response and left his younger sibling to his work.

Of course Loki had no intention on meeting him there and he planned on hiding away at Tony's for the rest of the day. 'Thor cannot remain in town for long...', Loki thought grimly as he ignored the questioning looks from his co-workers and set out making a mocha coffee for a woman bundled in a wooly coat, 'He'll have to leave eventually.'

Loki sighed in relief as the elevator came to a stop and the doors opened.

His entire walk home he'd been worried that Thor would appear in front of him again and he would be forced to continue the conversation he didn't want to have. He didn't want to relive those months before he'd run, when Thor had blamed him for Baldur's death. They had blamed him for it. It was their fault that he'd reduced himself to becoming a toy for others to use and discard. Sure, they'd apologized to him eventually but the damage had been done and those mental scars wouldn't ever heal, just like the physical ones he bore on his back. It was too late for Thor to try and make amends now.

Loki quickly took a hot shower and changed into a pair of his pajama pants and a loose fitting shirt, leaving his hair damp and hanging around his face. The water and the heat had calmed down his nerves and he dropped down on the couch, casting a quick look at the art deco clock, a clock that stood out against all the modernistic décor. It would be another hour before Tony was back from the office which meant that Loki could take advantage of the quiet. When Tony was around the place was never silent and sometimes Loki just needed silence. Today was one of those days.

He couldn't believe that it was already October and that he'd already been here for a few weeks. He'd adjusted surprisingly quickly to this new living situation to the point that he almost forgot to pay the bills on his apartment. Luckily, he still had money saved in an account for just such things. Loki knew he'd have to return there soon. Despite the relationship he didn't plan on living there forever. He'd already stayed longer than he'd planned on. He got up and walked over to the windows overlooking the city, taking in the figures milling about on the ground. He wondered how many of them had lived their lives like he did and how many lived a life he wished he'd had.

Loki was pulled from his thoughts when he heard the elevator coming back up. He looked towards the doors, brows drawn together. Perhaps Tony had come home early? When they opened he was met by a different face. An irritated sound escaped his mouth. Thor. It would figure that he'd find him anyhow. Except how did he manage to use the private elevator? That was a curious question.

"The red-headed woman downstairs allowed me to use the elevator." Thor answered as if he'd read Loki's mind. He stepped out of the lift and stared at Loki with disappointment. "When you didn't show up I went back and asked Miss Lewis where you lived. Though, it seems that you are better off than I expected. You're living with Anthony Stark I've heard."

"So? What does it matter?" Loki spat out, more defensive than he'd meant to come off as. His mouth snapped shut and he turned his back to his brother, crossing his arms. "Why won't you just leave me be?"

"Because you're my brother, Loki. I want what's best for you." Thor covered the distance between them swiftly and spun Loki around by the shoulder, meeting Loki's angry expression face to face. "Enough avoiding. Just let me talk to you. You do not even have to answer me. Just listen to my words. That's all I ask of you." When Loki only continued to glare, Thor took it as permission to continue, "Mother misses you. She keeps her favorite picture of you near her at all times and she tries to hide it but she speaks to it sometimes when she thinks we aren't nearby."

Loki's shoulders slumped, eyes flickered closed, "Has she? Is she…well? Otherwise."

Thor gave him a smile, "She is. As strong as ever."

"That is good to hear. I'm glad." Loki's fingers twined together and he met Thor's eyes, "Out of everyone, I never wanted to hurt mother. I fear that I'm very good at cause irreversible harm. I'm so sorry about that. I truly am. But it doesn't chance what happened. You all blamed me for what happened and what's done is done."

"You're right, we…misaimed our sorrow. We are in the wrong in that instance but we never hated you nor were we truly angry at you. We apologized to you so much for it but I feel like no matter what I say you'll believe the complete opposite. I can only say so much to you about things." Thor let go of Loki's shoulder, arm dropping to his side. One of Loki's most infuriating faults was this idea that everyone was out to get him and it drove Thor insane. He was aware of the victimizing and the jealousy; always had been, and he quietly admitted to himself that he hadn't helped the situation. He'd been blind to it, driven by his own ambitions and growing up he felt like he had little time to focus on his tagging along little brother.

Thor regretted it now and if it hadn't been for Jane and his father he still probably would have been the same brash, bull-headed man he had been when Loki had left. He just had to get Loki to see that. A likely impossible task but one he was willing to attempt for his brother's sake.

"What do expect from me? To hug you and say that I forgive you for treating me like an outsider in my own family? That the fact that father decided to wait till I was long since an adult before telling me I was adopted? That your friends treated me like waif whenever I joined with you?" Loki's voice grew more aggressive as he went on, "No, do not expect me to suddenly be fine with your apologies."

That was really all it took for one of Thor's large fists to come up and slug Loki in the mouth, knocking the thinner man onto the floor, landing solidly on his rear. Wide green eyes stared up at him, one hand clutching his bruised jaw. Had it been any other situation it would have been hilarious. Unfortunately, this wasn't the time or the place and Thor barely managed to dodge a sharp kick to the kneecap. Loki had always been agile and where Thor had been brawn, Loki had succeeded in speed. So it was no wonder that despite a throbbing jaw, he was up on his feet quickly.

More fists would have gone flying if the elevator hadn't opened again and Tony stepped out to behold the sight of a large blond Norwegian descendent and a decidedly pissy and bruised Loki facing off. He looked confused from one to the other, holding up one finger and mentally calculating a possible defensive maneuver to protect Loki from the blond, "Okay, does anyone want to explain what the hell is going on here?"

"This is my Neanderthal of a brother, Thor." Loki answered, rubbing at his bruised face again now that he wasn't distracted. "Thor, this is my…housemate, Tony. Whom I'm sure you've heard about. Excuse me for a moment. I need an ice pack…"

Tony watched Loki stomp away and he had to ask, "Can someone just tell me what I missed?"

"Loki being Loki." Thor replied simply, taking in Tony's smaller stature and the guarded look on his face. Protective. So this was the man that won over his brother. He decided at the moment not to mention that he knew of their relationship. With a weary and regretful look on his face he added, "I didn't mean for it to go that far. I don't like striking him."

"Yeah, but-"

Loki returned with a pack pressed against his face and both men turned to look at him, "Now, Thor, if you've told me what you must. Would you mind leaving us be?"

Thor's blue eyes closed for a moment before he turned to Tony with a small smile, "I'm glad to have met you. Please take care of my brother; he needs someone like you in his life to look after him."

"Uh, yeah. Sure." What was that all about? Tony scratched at his head and when Thor had left he looked to Loki for an explanation for the bruise and why Thor was even there.

"He found me at work today. A co-worker told his girlfriend where I was." Loki dropped onto the couch, head in his hands as he slouched over his knees. He didn't mention the bruise as he continued. "I can't even fathom this. I don't understand why this is happening. I haven't spoken to the man in almost two years and he shows up in my life again."

Tony walked over and sat down by his side, placing a hand on his back, "You could just, you know, hear him out. I mean the guy is your brother. Pushing any past indiscretions under the rug isn't gonna help. Trust me, I know this from experience. My father was a crappy father. Like I told you, he ignored me most of my childhood but…I've moved past that now, or at least I'm mostly past it, and I focus on my company and I try leading a life I'm happy with. It wasn't simple. I made serious mistakes. You met me after I'd learned but I still make some. Pepper helped me a lot and so did others and at the time I didn't believe them but now I do."

"It isn't as simple for me, Stark, you don't know what it was like. Not only did my father ignore me but he also lied to me. My brother treated me like I was irritating and his friends did the same and…" And then there was Baldur. He was sweet and beautiful and well-loved. Thor and his friends had no problem bringing him along. "It's complicated. Immensely so."

"Just tell me what the problem is so I'll understand. I'll bet it isn't any worse than most people in the world." Tony suggested carefully, watching for any indication of Loki's barriers rising. He'd been closed off again, he'd noticed over the last few days, causing him to worry that he was going back to his old ways. Tony hadn't come this far to have Loki backtrack. "You never told me anything about your family."

Loki sat up and fixed Tony with a stare, lips twisting slightly and a pink tongue poking out to lick them in thought. "I'm not sure I should. This is my past, Tony, everything I have keep guarded. They're things I don't want to think about and I don't want pity from people regarding them. I didn't wish to be sought out for a reason and Thor doesn't seem to be able to understand that. You're an intelligent man at the very least you should. I'm happy now. I'm content to live as I have been. Please understand this."

Tony felt the guilt of his snooping return at these words, the fact that he'd gone against Loki's words and dug into his past. He hadn't found anything big, nothing that should be that big of a deal but he knew, understood that to Loki it would be. The man had refused to tell anyone anything, ran away, became a prostitute, and all just to avoid a family Tony was certain cared about him. Yeah, he didn't know the details but just from briefly meeting Thor he saw the pain of not getting through to Loki. You didn't see that sort of thing in the face of someone who didn't care.

"Just promise me you will tell me at some point, alright?" Tony brushed a hand across Loki's bruise and chuckled, "I can't tell what hurt you more, the bruise or the hit itself. Are you okay? I'll go hunt down big bro and fight him for you if you want."

"It doesn't matter now. Though I appreciate the offer." Loki sighed, closing his eyes at the gentle touch on tender skin. He spent the next few minutes just feeling Tony's closeness and his touch and when there was a jolt of arousal he decided that it was an opportunity to take his mind off of his problems. With a small grin he leaned in and pressed a heated kiss to Tony's lips before shifting so that he straddled his legs. "Why don't we move onto something a little more enjoyable?"

Any objections Tony might have had to the idea flew out the window as soon as Loki stripped out of his shirt and bottoms. "Sounds like sound plan to me."

"Good." Loki murmured and his expression turned thoughtful, "None of our things are in here…"

"I'm on it." Tony picked Loki up enough to set him aside then sprinted to his room. He returned a minute later with the bottle and plopped back into his seat where Loki moved back to his position on Tony's lap. He squeezed some of the liquid like substance onto his hand while Loki undid the trousers of his suit and took him out of its confines. Tony bit back a sound as Loki's skilled hands went to work. "You really have an unfair advantage. All you have to do is give me a look and I'd be done."

"No talking." Loki kissed him once more, silencing his words in his mouth. "You'll ruin the moment."

Tony made a face but remained quiet as Loki undid his tie, setting it aside and went about removing his suit jacket and dress shirt. Loki's mouth moved down Tony's jaw to his neck where he bit down hard enough to leave an angry red mark that would be hard to explain later, sucking on it for added measure. Tony's hands moved down to his own member, rubbing some of the liquid he'd almost forgotten onto it, though by this point it wasn't especially necessary mostly thanks to Loki's actions. His hands made their way to Loki as he raised to his knees enough for one of Tony's fingers to slip inside, soon joined by another as he prepared him.

"I'm fine." Loki told him after a moment, reaching back and swatting at him.

Tony removed his fingers, "Are you-"

"Yes, I'm sure. I'd like a little pain. And I told you not to speak. Listen to me or I'll make you listen." Loki reached over and picked up the tie, letting the smooth material glide over his hand. "Now, tie me up. Don't ask why. Just do it."

Tony obliged, taking the tie and binding Loki's hands behind his back. Loki rose to his knees again as Tony adjusted himself then slid back down onto him with a gasp, head tilting back. He took a moment to get used to the feeling once he'd settled back down, shifting and making Tony swear colorfully beneath him. Loki smirked dangerously, leaning forward and biting down on his shoulder briefly and causing a whole new slew of them to fill the air.

Tony's hands skimmed over Loki's stomach and tweaked one of the pert nipples, this time making Loki be the one to swear. He repeated the action on the other one, grazing a nail across it until Loki yelped and nearly fell over. His hands roamed up to his shoulders and he lightly gripped the back of his neck and then threaded his fingers into the dark hair there. Loki sighed lowly and began to slowly gyrate his hips, letting Tony help him keep his balance. He felt Tony's hands go to his hips where they held to his hip bones, lifting him up and lowering him again.

"Here's a question for you. How do you plan on keeping me from talking when your hands are tied?" Tony teased, suddenly holding Loki in place. He watched with amusement as Loki's mouth opened and closed for a moment from either befuddlement or just from the building pressure. "Ah ha, see now you're at a loss. Which means I can take advantage."

"You wouldn't…" Loki glared feverishly at him and at Tony's grin.

"But I would." Tony scooped Loki up easily despite the height difference and moved him behind the couch, resting him against it. Loki's legs instinctually wrapped around Tony's waist and after a moment of adjusting again, Tony pushed into him. At the angle he easily found the right spot and Loki's back arched. If it wasn't for the fact that Tony's hands were helping him stay steady he probably would have fallen backwards. He wrapped an arm around Loki's back and freed the other so that his hand could work on him. "You look gorgeous right now."

Loki cracked open an eye, "And…I hate…you."

"I doubt that." Tony kissed him deeply until Loki bit his lip, drawing blood. "That was just petty."

"Hm." Loki sounded, tightening his long legs around Tony, "Quit talking. Harder."

Tony rolled his eyes and thrust hard enough to make Loki grunt. He worried absently on whether or not he'd end up unintentionally hurting him but when gasps turned into moans and Loki's hips frantically moved against his, he came to the conclusion that it was what the man wanted. Still, Tony reached behind his back and using one hand, undid the knot in the tie, freeing Loki's arms. Immediately they snaked around Tony's own back and nails bit into the skin in a way that was both pleasurable and painful.

Loki's legs loosened and he balanced himself against Tony, breathing hard, "Change positions."

"Uh, alright." Tony didn't think he could disagree with anything at this point as he removed himself from Loki, watching as he winced while he turned to face the couch and leaned over it. Tony reentered him hard and there was a breathless gasp as he nearly pulled all the way out again and thrust in again. He repeated the action as Loki squirmed and leaned over to press a series of kisses across his back.

It took only a few more thrusts before both of them were lying on the floor. Tony pulled Loki closer to him, trailing fingers up and down his thigh. He chewed on the inside of his lip. Now would be a good time to confess but could he? Would he risk it? Loki grinned up at him, face still flushed. He really was beautiful, even when disheveled and still glowing with the after effects of orgasm. The smile slipped as he seemed to sense something, "What's bothering you?"

"I have a confession…" Tony muttered reluctantly after a moment, knowing what he had to do. He sat up, brushing his knuckles across Loki's unbruised cheek, seeing the confusion in green eyes. Oh god, this was going to suck ass.

"What is it?"

"When you went out to see that friend of yours, I…kinda googled you." Tony quickly threw his hands up, "I didn't learn anything really. Just that your family is super fucking rich, not that I'm one to talk, and that you had two brothers, one of which is deceased. And that's it. The rest of the stuff was just business crap. Which means that you guys are pretty good at keeping things on the down low regarding family stuff."

He could watch as Loki's face shifted through several different emotions. Shock, anger, sadness and finally settling on a blank apathy. In his head that last one was worse than the first three. It got worse as Loki pulled away and stood up and looked down at him coldly, making the blood in Tony's veins freeze solid. That stare could freeze the flames of hell. "Loki, I'm sorry, I really, really am. I regret it. I do. I was just upset and I didn't think about it before I did it."

"But you did it and that's what matters, Stark. I trusted you and I thought that despite your questioning that you wouldn't do anything to invade my personal matters. Clearly I was wrong." Loki grabbed his clothing off the floor, slipping it on. He felt as if the weight that had been slowly lifting off of him had suddenly crashed onto his shoulders once more and those walls slammed back into place. "How do I know that you were just using me? You took an interest in me the moment I walked through those doors so how do I know that you didn't just want to sleep with me and discard me like your series of women?"

Tony quickly did up his pants and stood up, "I wouldn't do that and you damn well know that. This is what bothers me. You act like everyone is out to get you and while you doubt everyone else you expect everyone to trust you completely. Yeah, I screwed up with that but at least I'm man enough to admit to it and I told you about it. At least give some leeway. I didn't learn anything."

"It's too late now. I had enough of being blamed and used and betrayed by people. I didn't want to have the same problems with you." Loki let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head, "I should have known better."

"Loki…" Tony reached out to him only to have him brushed off, "Would you just listen?"

"I'm done, Stark. You had the one chance and you blew it." Loki went for his room, Tony quick on his heels.

"What are you doing?"

"Leaving."

Tony watched helplessly as Loki packed up his belongings minus the things that Tony had bought or him, tossing them in his bags. He didn't know what else to say or do and stared wordless at him. It was ridiculous. He'd never dated someone as paranoid as Loki and cared about them so much. And here was that man shoving past him and leaving down the elevator. Leaving his life.

"Please don't go…" He managed to say just as the doors closed.

How had things end up so fucked up?