Chapter 15

Steve jostled Jaime's hand and then tenderly brushed her cheek, calling her name very softly - and when that failed to rouse her from her nightmare, he moved to sit on the edge of her bed and (ignoring the pain in his ribs) began rocking her in his good arm as his finger pressed the call button.

All three of her doctors (already alerted by alarming changes on the monitors) rushed to Jaime's bedside. ''She won't wake up!'' Steve told them.

''Give her a minute,'' Conrad suggested. ''Just keep doing what you're doing - and talk to her.''

Michael didn't like what the read-outs were telling him. Jaime's blood pressure was through the roof and her oxygen level was dropping rapidly. Steve continued to hold her close, crooning in her ear and gently rubbing her back with the fingers of his immobilized arm.

''Sweetheart, you're dreaming...and you need to wake up now. You're safe here...I've got you...you're safe...''

Gradually, Jaime's pressure returned to almost-normal as the dream's hold on her began to lessen. Her eyes snapped open - and she buried her head on Steve's shoulder, collapsing into soul-wrenching sobs. Mark Conrad knew that as alarming as this episode was, it was also an excellent sign. Jaime was beginning to release the anguish that had been inflicted on her...and although it was merely the tip of the iceberg, at least the iceberg was starting to melt.

Steve had still not left the hospital, in spite of having been released a week earlier. He'd spent most of his waking hours at Jaime's bedside and at night would doze in a chair to be right there to comfort her when her dreams turned ugly. Jaime was feeling stronger now - physically anyway - and was meeting daily with Doctor Conrad to work on the rest. Accompanied by Security (following at a tactful but still quite watchful distance), she and Steve took a walk down to the lake to get her out of the hospital setting (and mindset), if only for a little while.

''I wonder if Oscar will ever let me go back to work now,'' Jaime sighed wistfully, ''after the way things got so messed up.''

Steve knew it was time to tell her exactly how and why things had gone wrong. If she was, at some point, to return to life as an operative, his mistake could be a learning experience for her. He summed it all up for her, as simply and honestly as he could.

''One word made all that difference,'' Jaime marveled.

''Yup. But when we make a mistake - even as big as the one I made - we have to learn from it, forgive ourselves...and move on. We can't let it eat away at our confidence.''

''That makes a lot of sense. So...do you think he will? Let me come back, I mean.''

''Have you talked about this with Oscar at all?''

''Well, no...not yet. But I will,'' Jaime promised.

''Are you sure you wouldn't rather find a less dangerous profession...like maybe lion taming?''

Jaime laughed...and Steve smiled. The sound was music to his ears.

''What do you think?'' Jaime asked, running her desire to return to work past Mark Conrad before she broached it with Oscar.

''It's how you feel about it that's important, Jaime.''

''Yes, but I'd really like your opinion.''

''Alright. I think it's too early to even consider the notion at this point, when you're still having nightmares every night. In the future, yes; if it's what you really want...and not what you feel is expected of you.'' The doctor knew that a release from the OSI on psychological grounds was just about the only way to leave without an automatic pass to the government's retirement community for former operatives. He and Oscar had already briefly touched bases on the subject and agreed it could be a possibility for Jaime - without any bias or stigma attached - should she feel unable to continue, after what she'd been through.

''Well, of course it's expected of me, but -''

''Not necessarily.''

''But it's also something I want to do! Not just to repay a debt...but because I was pretty darn good at it once! Steve and Oscar both told me so!''

Conrad smiled. ''Then we'll start working on getting you ready for that - and talk about getting Oscar's approval as well.'' He already knew that Oscar would gladly welcome Jaime back into the OSI fold - if and when her three doctors all deemed her able and ready. To hear her asking about it this soon made Mark Conrad marvel at her resilience.

''There's movement again,'' Hansen began, at his next daily sit-down meeting with Oscar, Russ and the top men from the Southern California branch of the FBI. ''My sources have started hearing rumblings...''

''Of what, exactly?'' Russ asked. He still looked like the walking wounded but had returned rapidly to a near-normal routine.

''That...we don't know,'' Hansen admitted. ''But something is brewing - and there are more of them than just the three stragglers.''

''Terrific,'' Oscar groused. ''I knew they wouldn't ride quietly off into the sunset - and I figured they'd expand their forces; I'd just hoped it wouldn't be this soon. We'll need to bolster Security forces on both coasts...and especially surrounding Jaime and Steve. She's due to leave the hospital tomorrow.''

''Can you keep her there?'' Jack queried. ''At least for a few more days?''

''Jaime? Not likely,'' Russ chimed in. ''But I'd think she'll be easier to protect at home - with a far smaller area to cover than National Medical. We'll still need Security there too, though. Of course.''

''Of course,'' Hansen agreed. ''They may be getting ready to make their next move. It sounds like that's the case - but when they do, we'll be ready.''