Welcome back! Ok, last we left off, Solid Snake and Otacon joined the nWo and the Hardys were flying over a curious building with a giant pentagram painted on top of it. So, it's only natural we join up with DX and their new passenger…

HHH: So, you're saying that you were just playing around and, as you put it, "exercising the ol' broom"? Is that it?

Kid: Yes gents, that's precisely what I'm saying. I was 'floying around 'till me mum called me in for dinner.

X-Pac: You know, you really need to watch where you're flying, you could've got hurt, or killed, even.

HBK: Yeah, Pac is right—you need to be a bit more careful, kid.

HHH (smiling): Damn, I never, in a MILLION years, thought that, of ALL people, HARRY fucking POTTER would join us on what's basically an international beer and porn run!

Harry: Gents, I just thank you f'having me along, right. I hope my powers will be of some use to you on this journey. It's sort of been a curiosity to see what it'd be like to be involved with pro wrestling.

HBK: Yeah, I know you can't learn that at Hogwarts, can you?

Harry: Well, actually Shawn, that's not ENTIRELY true.

HBK: Wha? Well, what do you mean, small fry?

Harry: Hogwarts did, indeed, have a short-lived wrestling team, but it had to be shuttered, I'm afraid.

X-Pac: Well…why?

Harry: The problem was, was that too many of the students started summoning demons from other dimension to either have them wrestle or HELP the students win wrestling matches.

(HHH and HBK look at each other…)

HHH: Well, really…that's not too far from WWE nowadays!

HBK: Yeah, we have all sorts of…demons running around in the WWE!

Harry: Really? Hmm…interesting. You know, Hunter, I've always wanted to learn how to do your…crotch chop, is that what it's called? I've always wanted to do it proper in front of a live audience.

HHH: Are you kidding? It's easy, shrimp! Just watch me when we go get something to eat—it's sort of a…presentation, of sorts.

(X-Pac and HBK start laughing a little)

Harry: Sounds nice, can't wait to learn!

HHH: Yeah kid. Just follow me, and I can show you the power of the PIN!

Harry: Umm…the power of the…pin?

HHH: Of COURSE! Kid, it'll be me and you, traveling all over this big world, pinning people in various cultures! It'll be GAMETASTIC!

(HBK and X-Pac roll their eyes…)

HHH: Just you wait! Soon enough, you'll be pinning more people, than, than…I can't even IMAGINE, kid!

Harry: WOW, thanks, Mr. H!

HHH: Eh, don't mention it, kid—just remember who made you what you WILL become, and don't forget to let me pin you when time comes!

Harry: Why, of course, Mr. H! I'll never forget where I came from!

HHH: Damn straight!

(HBK and X-Pac look at each other and just shake their heads slowly.)

We'll leave DX be and join up with Hogan and the boys, who have apparently found their way back on course…

Hogan: That dirty, no good, spic! He allowed us to get off course, who KNOWS how much time we lost, brother!

Nash: Yeah, I'm gonna' powerbomb his ass straight through to other end of the earth for that little stunt there!

(Nash turns toward Hall and Hall pulls out another 40 oz of beer from his tights and starts drinking it…)

Hogan: Anyway, we gotta' go down there and get some directions or something to the nearest Porn outlet.

Nash: Yeah, and then a liquor store.

(Hall pulls out another 40 oz and starts drinking it a Nash glances over at him…)

Hogan: Guys, we're SO gonna' beat those no-good no goodnicks, the Guerreros!

Snake: Yeah, all the rice and beans in the world ain't gonna' save them now!

(Hall pulls out yet another 40 oz from his tights and starts drinking it…)

Hogan: That's what I'm talking about, brother!

Nash: NWO 4-LIIIIIII-

(Hall pulls out another 40 oz and starts drinking it. For all intents and purposes, Hall has 4 40-oz bottles in his mouth at one time and is drinking ALL of them. Nash finally speaks up…)

Nash: Sorry Hulk, sorry for cutting off the "4-life" catchphrase, but I can't ignore THIS bullshit anymore…

Hulk: What's going on, brother?

Nash (calmly): Scott, you realize that, you can't actually DO that, right? No one can fit four bottles THAT big in their mouth at one time and drink from ALL of them at the same time.

(Suddenly, Otacon materializes…)

Otacon: Snake, your ex girlfriend, Meryl could do that!

Snake (smiling): Yeah, she WAS the best! Damn, I miss the way she used to suck MY "solid snake".

The boys all share a good laugh, as Snake reminisces. We'll leave them, and go visit the Hardys, as they've just landed on the coast…

Matt: Ok, I'm starved! We need to get something to eat and do it quickly!

Jeff: Ah can certainly relate to that, let's go!

(Jeff presses a button, and the Ladder disappears from the top and goes back down underneath the base ladder as it was before initial takeoff)

Lita: Hey look! There's a Burger King, let's go!

Matt: Ok guys, here's the deal—We have to make this last, we're still an incredible ways away from London, I mean, we landed on the COAST of this island.

Lita: That's right, when we get done eating, we're gonna' REALLY hafta' cook!

(Jeff mashes the accelerator, and the tables, ladders, and chairs lean backwards and then forward as they zoom off toward the restaurant in a cloud of tire dust. They arrive at the restaurant and pull up to the drive-thru. Jeff waits a couple minutes…)

Matt: Why isn't anyone answering? I can tell this place is open.

Lita: Hmm, Jeff, maybe you should say something?

Jeff: Hello…any—anyone there?

(A voice comes over the speaker…)

Voice: Hello, welcome to Burger King, may I tyke ya' order?

Jeff: Yeah, I'll have a Whopper with medium fries and a chocolate shake.

Voice: Okay, anything else?

Lita: Yes, I'll have a double Whopper with cheese, 2 large orders of fries, 3 apple pies…and a Diet Coke.

(Matt just looks at Lita, shaking his head)

Matt:…a Diet Coke—you know, you never cease to amaze me, Lita.

Voice: Ok, will that be all?

Matt: Uh, no—I'd like a Big Mac, a 20-piece McNugg—

Voice (TOTALLY cutting matt off): -Uh sir, we don't have Big Macs here, NOR do we have 20 piece McANYTHING. This is Burger King, not Maccas!

(Matt, a bit offended, looks at Jeff and Lita briefly…)

Matt: Look pal! Just gimme' a…a…double hamburger—NO CHEESE! And gimme' a side of onion rings!

Voice: We're out of onion rings.

Matt: Well how about some fries-with no salt?

Voice: (sighs): Sir, if I make a new batch with no salt, then there'll be a wait on the fries.

Matt: Well damn! What DO you have?

Voice: That's ready to go now?

Matt: Yes, ready to go NOW!

Voice (slightly sarcastic): Well, we have the regular fries…and THEY have salt on them, you know.

(Jeff and Lita are giggling...)

Matt: FINE! Lemme' get my double hamburger—which better NOT have any cheese on it, along with a fruit salad.

Voice: What size of fruit salad?

Matt (growing increasingly impatient): A large…PLEASE.

Voice: Ok, pull around to the window.

Lita: Gee, he didn't even tell us how much we owed.

Matt: Geez…I don't know what gets wrong with some people. So far, I've come to the conclusion that these British "blokes" can be just as obnoxious as Americans! If I wanted to get rude treatment at a restaurant, I would've just ate at a local fast food joint at home!

(So they pull up to the window and a young man is currently taking another order and rolling his eyes. The Hardys can hear the conversation…)

Voice: So, a medium fry is 69 cents?

Boy: Yes lady, and your senior coffee is still 99 cents, okay?

Voice: How much for a large fry?

(The young man in the window takes a deep breath and continues…)

Boy: Ma'am, the prices are clearly listed on the menu right in front of you.

Voice: Oh…I see. So, a Large fry is one Quid?

Boy: (sighing again) Yes, it's one quid.

Voice: Umm, that'll be 'ull, then.

Boy: What'll be 'ull?

Voice: Remember, I ordered a senior coffee?

Boy: No you didn't—neva'mind, lady, pull on up to the window, yeah?

(The boy turns and opens the window and Jeff hands the money over.)

Matt: Hey, what's your name? Stu, is it?

Stu: Yeah, so?

Matt: Look, I can tell you don't like your job, but please, try not to take it out on us—we didn't do anything to you, man!

Stu: Look, I'm aspiring to be a pro wrestler someday and I'm gonna' be big. I can't WAIT to get out of this…pit. You customers come in here every damn day asking the same nonsensical inquiries!

Lita: Well, what do you mean?

Stu: Ok, put yourself in My shoes, huh? I'm here for the better part of the day answering the same questions, smelling the same stinking food every day. If I had a..a…NICKEL for all the times I hear "how much is a medium fry", I'd be rich and wouldn't even HAVE to have dreams!

(The Hardys all look at each other…)

Stu: I'm telling the lot of you, right NOW! That I'll be bigger than ANY of you can anticipate, and trust me when I tell you this—don't forget the name of Stu Bennett! Now here's your bloody food!

(Stu shoves the bags to Matt and shuts the window.)

Matt gets his burger and salad out before handing the bag to Jeff…

Matt: Well, the kid may have wrestling aspirations or whatever, but he suuuure can make a mean burger!

Lita: Yeah, tell me about it!

Lastly, we'll pay a visit to Los Guerreros and Trish, as they've been cleared and have just landed at Tokyo International airport…

Trish: Wow, every time I COME here, this place is crowded.

Eddie: Yeah mami, it feels good to be in a place so crowded with all the confidence that you're the tallest person there!

(Eddie, Chavo, and Trish share a quick laugh…)

Trish: Hey, so where's the car rental center?

Chavo looks over the balcony and points to a stand with a yellow sign that reads "Hurts" along with a bunch of symbols.

Chavo: Look, over down there—that must be it, let's move!

(So as they're hurrying through the airport to get to the car rental stand, they run into someone-LITERALLY. Eddie, Chavo, Trish, and the other people are picking themselves up off of the floor in the hectic airport…)

Eddie: Hey ese, why don't you watch where you're going?

Chavo: Didn't you see us coming? What? You need glasses, or something?

Guy: Ugh…look who's talking…ouch!

Trish: Wait—HEY, Eddie, Chavo—don't you know them?

Eddie and Chavo look at each other and then back at the couple in front of them…)

Chavo (smiling): No fucking way—it CAN'T be you!

Eddie (extending his arm in a handshake): Wait…IS it really you?

(The man's dog licks Eddie's hand in a gesture of friendship. Eddie wipes it off on his tights.)

Eddie: Ugh…your dog, ese, he's uh…friendly, yeah?

Trish: Oh my GOD, how long has it been, Shaggy?

(Shaggy and Trish share a tight, friendly hug…)

Shaggy: Hoo…a long time, Trish! Ever since we solved the mystery of who kept replacing your mascara with dog turds, right Scoob?

Scooby: RRRRRIGHT, RAGGY!

Shaggy: Hey, it's also been a loooong time since I felt those big titties on my chest, right Scoob?

Scooby: RIG ROOBS, RIG ROOBS, RAGGY-SCRROOOOOBY-DOOOBY-DOOOOOO!

Eddie (stroking his chin): You know, you guys are pretty good at solving things and getting things done—even though you're afraid of your own shadows, haha. Hey, I have a proposition for you, homes…

Aaaaaand we'll stop this here for tonight, with no further questions, your honor.

.

I will, however, see you next time—same Warrior time, same Warrior place, same Warrior channel!