Here we are again…just me…and you. Ooooh…touching, caressing, loving, and rubbing each other—and reading yet another chapter of the adventure! Tonight, let's go and visit Los Guerreros…and friends, as they're on the open road.

Shaggy: Look guys—a billboard for a strip club! Wow…that stripper looks a LOT like Daphne!

Trish: Hmm…you know, I could use a li'l strip club action, myself, hee hee!

Chavo (smiling): So…Trish, you, uh…you into strip clubs like that?

Trish: HA! Are you kidding? Of COURSE! I love the way titties feel against my chest.

Chavo: SIMON, ESE! Uncle Eddie, we GOT to stop at a strip club tonight, bro!

Eddie: Meh…I dunno. Last time I went to a strip club, I got in trouble with Vickie, ese.

Shaggy: ZOIKS! Eddie, Vickie's not with us! You can go and STILL have fun! Besides, I'd pay MONEY to see Trish's funbags kissing ANOTHER pair of funbags!

Scooby: Runbags-RRRRunbags, AHEHEHEHEHEEE!

Shaggy: You said it, Scoob! In fact—you know that Velma chick, right?

Chavo: Yeah, mami's kind of thick, right?

Shaggy: I-indeed! So sometimes, she likes to wear low-cut tops and I overheard her telling Daphne that she could never find bras that fit properly. And, it's no wonder—I LOVE when she wears tank-tops, especially!

Chavo: Yeah, you get to see that lovely cleavage, dude!

Shaggy: You're right on the money, Chavo! The way those titties are all…MASHED together and muffin-top-ing out of the top of her shirt—it drives me wild!

Eddie: Hmm…that sounds like a good fantasy, but meh…I don't know-

Trish: Oh, come ON, Eddie! Vickie's fucking MILES away! Live a little, dude!

Chavo: Uncle Eddie—what's your hangup on that, anyway?

Eddie (sighing): Ok, one night last year—I got fucking WASTED, man. I only had a few dollars left, and I still wasn't done being…entertained…

Shaggy: So what happened?

Eddie: Well, I wound up going to this NASTY-ass stripclub. And, to give you an idea of just how nasty this place was, homes—lap dances? Only $4.

Trish: Ewww…dude.

Eddie: Yeah, I know! But it was a LAPDANCE, man! ONLY 4 DOLLARS, ESE! HOW COULD I RESIST?

Chavo: Wow…

Eddie: Yeah, and…so, I GOT that lapdance. And, lemme' tell you, ese—it's the first time I've EVER had to actually PUSH a stripper OFF of me! I mean, she wouldn't stop grinding, man!

Chavo: Damn…homegirl was workin' HARD for that 4 dollars!

Eddie: But that's not the worst of it—she slid her ass up my good silk shirt, ese! I yelled at her, I said "You crazy bitch! NOW look what you did—I got a damn SHIT streak on my new silk Armani!"

Trish: Daaaaaaaamn….how'd you explain that to your wife?

Eddie: Chica, I had to outright LIE! I told her that me and my brother Hector were playing basketball and his shorts fell when he went up to dunk and his buttcheeks caught my shirt—

Trish: Uh…yeah, so why didn't you just throw the shirt away?

Eddie: Are you kidding? It was a $500 shirt!

Chavo: Ok…look—tonight, Uncle Eddie—we'll go to a GOOD strip club, I'll even buy you a couple shots of tequila…whadd'ya say?

Eddie (shrugging): SIMON, ese! Sounds good to ME!

Ok, let's leave them be and join up with DX over in England, as they're in a hotel for the night. Hmm…seems that Hunter's on the phone…

HHH: Hello, Linda! Is Steph available?

Linda: Sure, I'll call her—STEPHANIE! PUT THAT HAM DOWN AND ANSWER THE DAMN PHONE!

Steph (chewing): Mmmm…um, hello?

HHH: Hey baby, how are ya'?

Steph: HUNTER! I'm good baby—I have my ham and my cherry pie.

HHH: Aww…that's good—wait! Did YOU say "cherry pie"?

Steph: Yes, sweetie! I sent my chauffer to the bakery to get me a pie.

HHH: You mean to tell me that you're going to eat an ENTIRE pie?

Steph (chewing): …and, AND a ham!

HHH: What? Are you PROUD of that, or something?

Steph: Well, why shouldn't I be?

HHH: Steph, it's bad ENOUGH that, when we go out to the local KFC, and you place an order large enough to choke a HORSE and the people behind the counter no longer think that your orders are for multiple people!

Steph: Wha…what do you mean, baby?

HHH: Steph! You CAN'T be serious! Those people actually KNOW you! Every time you place an order for your 25-piece chicken and biscuit MEAL, they always ask me what I want to order! And is it for here or to go!

Steph: But…HUNTER—

HHH: NO! Don't you start that "but Hunter" bullshit! Every damn week I have to buy you a new wardrobe because you've stretched out your clothes so badly, your fucking panties could be used as a parachute!

Steph: Stop, PLEASE-

HHH: You know what, Steph—you're just getting so fat that…that BLACK guys are hitting on you!

Steph: But you KNOW I only have eyes for YOU, Hunter!

HHH: Yeah, Me…pound cake, greasy-ass fried chicken, ribs, burgers, and whatever ELSE you can get your doughy hands on! Steph this is getting ridiculous! And again, I'm sick and TIRED of these black dudes hitting on you and you're all standing in front of ME blushing!

Steph (trying not to laugh): I-I'm hee-hee…SORRY Hunter! I don't look at ANY of them, baby!

HHH: I mean, really Steph—everyone knows that black guys LOVE fat white chicks! You can tell you're getting fatter by how many black guys hit on you, you know!

Steph: I can't BELIEVE you, Hunter! How could you be so…so…RACIST, UGH!

HHH (angrily): Oh, here we go again-just because I enjoy burying Booker T does NOT make me a racist! Look, I just called to check up on you anyway, so are ya' fine or not?

Steph (smirking): Yep…and so is my black lover! *click*

HHH (infuriated): WHAT THE—STEPH?...STEPH?...HELLO? Evil bitch.

Sephiroth (walking by): Hmm…so it does seem that she IS more evil that you, huh? AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!

HHH (glaring): Meeeeh….shut up. Damn, Sephiroth—I swear she just…just…brings it OUT of me, RRRRRRRGH! Can't STAND that bitch sometimes! If her daddy weren't so rich, I wouldn't even fucking BOTHER!

Ok, let's leave that scene and move on to a brighter one—with the nWo, as they're on the open road…

Nash: Hey Otacon, when's the last time you got laid, dude?

Otacon (blushing): Uh…ummm

Snake: Kev, you're embarrassing the li'l fella! Otacon, all we want to do is to make sure you have a good time with a nice, Christian woman-that has whore-ish tendencies.

Hall: Chico, I LOVE those types! I told this one chick, I was dating, mang—I told her that after she got out of church, she should come over MY place and fuck herself using one of my empty 40 oz. bottles! And she DID that shit, too!

Nash: Yeah, Otacon…THAT'S the type of woman you want, my man.

Otacon: Well, I-I dunno. She HAS to be into voyeurism and exhibitionism! I mean, we can get it on in public just by using stealth camouflage!

Hall: See? NOW you're thinkin', chico!

Snake: Hal, it's EASY to get laid, man. You'll see!

Hulk: Let me chime in, brothers. Otacon brother, what you want is a chick with low self-esteem!

Nash: Hulk's right! Tell'm Hulk!

Hulk: Yeah, you see, think about it, dude—women with low self-esteem appreciate ANY attention you can give them, but, the tough part is breaking through their defenses.

Otacon: Defenses?

Hulk: Of course, brother! She's gonna' be wonderin' why you're paying so much attention to HER because, you see, SHE thinks that she looks like crap, but YOU have to convince her OTHERwise, you see, brother?

Otacon: Hmm…I see your logic.

Hulk: Absolutely, man! Why, back in the day, when I was teaming up with Macho Man, before our matches, Miss Elizabeth used to let me finger her when Macho left to go down the aisle! Yeah, you see, Macho was always putting her down and everything, and she needed a shoulder to CRY on—so…why not ME, brother? Hahaha…yeah, her soft, hairy twat was fucking incredible, dude!

Otacon: Ah…I think I get it now!

Hall: Hey yo…always remember, chico—don't let her get too attached to you, either.

Hulk: Yeah, he's right, brother! As soon as she gives up the drawers, you're just…naturally going to feel the need to split, dude. Anyway—if you convince her that she's on the level of a-a…Ms. AMERICA, brother, then you're fucking home FREE!

Snake: and always—and I can't stress this enough—ALWAYS remember—have a PREPAID cellphone when you deal with one of those types. You ONLY want her to have a cellphone number for you—no addresses and DEFINITELY no landline phone numbers!

Nash: Yeah, that way, all she'll have is a cellphone number and, what it does, it give YOU the power!

Hulk: Absolutely, Big Kev—Otacon, dude, it gives you the power because, at ANY given time, you can just toss the phone—I mean, if you get like one of those convenience store phones, they're disposable—just like your woman—with low self-esteem, BWAAAAHAHAHAAAAAA! Now THAT'S "Hollywood"!

The boys all share a brief laugh as we finish off with a visit with the Hardys. Buuut, we'll stick with Lita and Matt…

Lita: So…

Matt: So?

Lita (rolling her eyes): It seems as though you LIKE having your dick sucked, huh?

Matt: Lita…I-I-…Lita, I don't know of ONE man that doesn't! What is your…your…AVERSION to it? I don't GET it!

Lita: Look—it's just something I don't do, ok?

Matt: I mean, you kiss ALL around it, but you—you never move in for the KILL! I couldn't HELP it—I THOUGHT it was YOUR tongue! It felt so GOOD, Lita!

Lita: How could you have thought it was me? MY tongue has a tongue ring in it! Did you FEEL a tongue ring?

Matt (helpless): I-I…wasn't THINKING about that-Lita, all I want is my dick sucked and my balls played with a little! I'm clean, I wash my ass!

Lita (eyebrow raised): You know, when I was on your stomach, I FELT you starting to hump Dora's mouth, you know?

Matt (sighing): MY GOD, Lita—what can I do to convince you? I-THOUGHT-IT-WAS-YOU! Simple as THAT!

Lita: Hmph!

.

Ok, we'll leave it at that for now—I've had enough fun tonight.

So friends…I certainly thank you for reading and reviewing (well...for those who actually DO it, anyway).

Lol, join me again—same Warrior time, same Warrior place, same Warrior channel!