I thought that wrapping up Grapefruits, the Adventure 4 would just be the end. I was wrong. I got started thinking—this thing needs an epilogue. So, here it is!

Otacon introduced stealth technology to the WWE. Now it turns out that the nWo developed a "Metal Gear Solid Stealth" division, led, of course, by Hogan's lieutenants Otacon and Solid Snake. They're in charge of uploading streaming media of the divas in various compromising positions, both in matches and in the locker rooms.

Sephiroth and HHH finally had their big match at WrestleMania. Stephanie came running down the aisle eating two subs at one time. HHH asked her what she was doing there and, in a shocking turn of events, she threw some of the lettuce from her sub in HHH's ffface. Sephiroth then pedigreed HHH through the ring mat and scored an easy 1-2-3. The mixed team of Seph n' Steph are topping the rankings.

Matt Hardy FINALLY convinced Lita to give him head! It was on Valentine's day, 2003. Lita went down on him, and, while it was good to him at first, Matt started getting uncomfortable. He said, "Uh, Lita, sweetie, could you ease up a little?"

Lita: What do you MEAN, "ease up"? This is what you wanted, mmmmmmmm…

Matt: Lita, the sheets are going up my ass!

Lita: See? Doesn't that feel good, Matt?

Matt: Dammit! That's not the point, the mattress just went up my ass…and why is the damn…ENTERTAINMENT center making its way over here? AAAAAAGH!

Trish and Cammy started the WWE's first lesbian tag team—the team of "Trammy". (Sort of like "tranny", but using and "m" instead of an "n"—oh you get it.) They're the number one contenders to the WWE tag team championships. They're facing the Dudley Boys at the Royal Rumble for the titles. At Wrestlemania, Trish almost lost her partner Cammy to the hands of Buh-Buh Ray when Cammy did a cannon-drill toward Buh-Buh, he blocked it and then picked her up and started dry-humping her in the middle of the ring. Trish tried to run over and stop him, but D-Von intercepted her with a flying chair swing. TESTIFY, MA' BROTHA'!

Katherine and Lita formed a tag-team, also. Katherine put a hex on HHH and made him lay down motionless in the ring. She ran to the back and flashed her side-boob to commissioner Mick Foley and it convinced him to make a match for the WWE heavyweight championship. She then called Lita down to ringside and had her pin a motionless HHH in the middle of the ring. Yep, that's right fans-LITA is the new 2003 world heavyweight champion! Katherine was able to stop DX from interfering by playing HBK's music over the loudspeakers-since his ego's so big, he just HAD to dance and shake his bootay! she stopped X-Pac by having a half-naked Chyna jump out of the aisle and chase him around the arena, she stopped Billy Gunn and Road Dogg by having Tommy Dreamer and the Dudleys take them out with tables, SHOVELS, and chairs (oh MY!), and she stopped Harry Potter, Cloud, and Tifa by running down the aisle and clotheslining all 3 of them. Cloud tried to use his sword, which is strong to fire attacks, but it turns out that, when he was clotheslined, his energy bar went to zero because his sword wasn't strong to clotheslines from OCs.

Donald Duck and Booker T became good friends; now, what those two have in common, I'll never fucking know.

Gordon Ramsay is the new Cruiserweight champion! He defeated Billy Kidman by throwing curry powder in his eyes while his star pupil, sous chef Matt Hardy, had the referee distracted. That night, he developed a new finisher called "Proper Seasoning". He'd use a variety of powdered spices—usually found at the Dollar Stores—to finish off his opponents. His opponents started complaining of smelling like celery root and curry "all the damn time". He once tried to use soy sauce to beat Tajiri, but Tajiri caught it and spat it back in Gordo's face. Gordon yelled, "AGH…BLOODY HELL!" The only problem was that the ref SAW Tajiri spit it in Gordon's face and Gordon, blinded by soy sauce, rolled out of the ring rubbing his eyes with his dish towel, but retaining the WWE Cruiserweight championship.

Vince drank so much Glenlivet, and so much Jaegermeister; he saw so many "Milky Mams" and "British Bums", that he lost all mental control. He put Harry Potter in a hardcore match against Linda McMahon, Terry Funk, and Chris Jericho. To keep things short, Harry won the match due to casting a 3-second sleeping spell on Y2J. He then casted a spell on Vince! Harry called Vince down to ringside, Vince came strutting out and Harry said, "Inkly, dinkly, binkly, berm, make Vince's balls continually fill with sperm! And, at that moment, history was made—Vince's sperm would keep developing at a rate of 9 times the normal rate. His balls would constantly swell and Vince would constantly have to masturbate to alleviate the symptoms. He tried to get his wife Linda to swallow all of it, but, after about a gallon, she no longer even had an appetite. Vince was last seen yelling from his hospital bed, "NUUUUUUUUURRRRRSE, I NEED TO BE DRAAAAAAAAANK AGAAAAAIIIIIIN!"

NOW, it's the end! I love you ALL!