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I ditched... I couldn't help it. I didn't think about Mrs. Cope calling my dad or what he'd say I was just so uber excited to actually have a hand written letter that I ran out to the parking lot in the pounding rain forgetting that I'd worn a white shirt and jumped in my truck. The envelope was thick like he'd written a lot but then I read the front which said "Pictures Enclosed:Please Do Not Bend." I had to breath. I was going to see what he looked like. Dear God, breath Bella. His handwriting was smeared on the front from the rain except for the return address which was listed as Afghanistan. He was in the thick of it then. I was terrified to open it but desperate to know what he had to say. I carefully opened the envelope trying to preserve it as best as possible. I turned the pictures over so I couldn't see them yet, I wanted to see what he had to say before I saw his face, and set them beside me then unfolded the letter. His handwriting was so beautiful.
Bella,
I thought we could continue to write for your project for school but theres so much more I'd like to say that these idiots here will just read and joke on me for. The past few months I've been writing yoiu have been amazing. I've looked forward to your emails every day. I crave the monanatony that is every day life at home. Here we wake before the sun and start PT, physical training, then we begin patrol. Army life isn't all it's cracked up to be. Yesterday we raided a house believed to house members of Al Quida and there were children playing in the floor with granades. Any second one of them could have pulled the pin and my life could have ended. It's horrible for me to even think about. I have no one I can share these thoughts with. My dad doesn't support my decision to enter the Army and my mom... well it would give her a heart attack. My friends at home are too busy with their own lives to worry about mine. I was the only one to enlist while they all went off to college. Jasper attends Texas A&M while Emmett got a scholarship to Notre Dame. My mom begged me to go to Columbia like my dad and study medicine but I knew this is what I had to do. Something was calling me here. Right now its 3am and the wind is howling because of a sandstorm and I'm lying in my rack thinking of rain. I'd love for glorious drops of rain to fall and break the heat. It has to be at least 105 right now. I can't sleep. Its hard to sleep here. Last week a guy I knew in basic was brought into MASH. He'd been patrolling with his unit when they'd been ambushed. It was horrible. The screams... Bella... I know this is probably too much for you but I need to get this out... I need someone to talk to. Can I do that? Can I tell you these things?
Edward
I saw a wet spot on the paper and looked around to see if I'd left my window down but I hadn't. I was crying... not just crying I was sobbing. After composing myself I was finally able to look at the pictures.
The first was a typical graduation photo of a handsome older blond man with dark blue eyes and a woman with carmel colored hair. Her green eyes glistened with tears as she stood next to a boy in a black cap and gown. It was the boy that took my attention. He was gorgeous. He had the same green eyes as the woman but the chisled jaw line of the older man. His smile was wide as he stood with both arms wrapped around the man and woman. The moved on to the next picture. It was the boy again, older in a camoflauge military uniform with a gun slung off his shoulder. The sleeves of the uniform were rolled up showing well formed biceps as he stood with one leg to the side like he was waiting for the picture to be overwith. His eyes twinkled though with humor at the photographer while he had a thumb under the strap of the gun on his shoulder. This was Edward... my Edward.
I drove home knowing my dad would still be at work and raced into my room. I pulled out every drawer in my desk and beside table looking for a suitable picture to send to Edward. Nothing... I had nothing. Had I never taken a picture before! Christ! That's when it hit me. I ran into my dads room and on the table by his bed was the best and one of the only pictures of me. Billy had taken the picture the year before at my birthday party prior to my finger slicing. I was sitting next to Jacob in the kitchen and he'd just told me a really dirty joke, in my ear of course, that had earned him a punch in the arm. We were laughing because my hand was sore. Jacob wasn't in the picture but I was smiling and my normally dull brown eyes looked alive. I practically ripped the picture out of the frame and took off to my room
Edward,
You can tell me anything. I'll admit it scares me to know its not safe but you're doing a service to your country, not only to me. I appreciate you so much for that. I ditched school today... I know... it was stupid. I was so shocked to have gotten a hand written letter that I just left when my teacher gave it to me. Of course it was raining (I'll give you some of my rain) so when I left I got soaked. I came straight home and searched my room up and down looking for a picture to send you. I finally stole one from my dads room. He won't be mad so don't worry about it. I don't really have a best friend here in Forks. I have friends that I've known all my but no one I can tell everything to. There's Jacob, of course, but he's like my brother and I just don't feel right telling him my deepest thoughts. Plus he's fifteen and thinks with his dick. It's as plain as the nose on my face that he's crushing on me but its not recipricated. That's just... gross. Ew... I hope one day to find that person I can't live without. That person I can't breath without. The person that is the rest of me. Someone who is my equal and I can trust and Jacob isn't it. He just won't get it through that thick Quilute skull of his. He thinks if he works on my truck enough I'll be indebted to go on a date with him. Fat chance that'll happen. You never told me what you're going to study when you get out.
Bella
I sealed the envelope and drove straight to the post office because I wasn't sure how many stamps to put on a letter going to Afghanistan. For three weeks I practicaly tore the mail from my dads hands flipping through the bills and junk mail hoping to see Edward's elegant script but I never saw it. It wasn't until three days before Christmas when my dad knocked on my door.
"Bells, you got something." he said opening the door cautiously.
I looked up and he held out an envelope. I snatched it from his hands and shoved him out of the room locking the door behind him.
Bella,
I'm sorry its taken me so long to write. Letters take about two weeks to get over seas and we've been busy here. We found evidence of a cell and had to follow it so I haven't been at camp. We just got back. We got the cell but not with out injury though. Not mine, I promise you. My buddy, Rodriqez, was injured. He's going home, which is good but not without loss. He won't walk again. The bullet went through his side and severed his spinal cord. He's happy, happier than I've seen him in a long time. Which makes me depressed. When it takes losing the use of your legs to get home to be happy theres something wrong. It makes me question my whole idea about coming here. I was so sure about this being the right choice. I'm not sure anymore. I probably should have just studied medicine. My mom wouldn't be so worried. I got your picture and I don't understand. You said you weren't attractive. I see a beautiful girl in this picture. Someone with beautiful brown eyes and soft mahagony hair. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I'm having to fight to keep the guys here from stealing the picture from above my rack. We sleep in a room with about ten bunk beds in it. I got a bottom rack and I put your picture along with the pictures of my parents above me. Don't let that Jacob kid get to you. I know what I was like at 15 and he's just horny. He'll grow out of it and realize your're better off as friends. If not, tell him I'll come kick his ass in 6 months. I'm thinking of studying music. Of course it won't make my dad happy but its safe which will be enough for my mom. I listen to as much classical as I can but I ran out of downloads on Itunes and haven't been able to get anymore since we haven't gone to a major city in months.
Edward
P.S. Merry Christmas
I knew then what I would do. I went down to the drug store with my savings, $150 dollars, and bought them out in Itunes downloads. I wrapped them in tissue paper and put them in a small box.
Edward,
I'm so sorry you hear about your friend though I'm glad he's going home. You're right. It is depressing that something like that would make him happy. You made the right decision to enlist, Edward. If you hadn't, we wouldn't have met. You wouldn't have me to talk to. Maybe thats why you were drawn to enlist, you never know. I'm not attractive but I appreciate your compliment. To tell you the truth, I sleep with your picture under my pillow. I know, its childish and so typical teenager of me but I can't help it. Its the last thing I see before I go to bed at night and the first I see when I wake up in the morning. I have no idea why I said that. About Jacob, he finally backed off. He's dating some girl named Bree. I know her of course but so does ever guy down at the reservation and I mean EVERY guy. But you're right, he's 15. He'll grow up eventually, I just feel sorry for Billy dealing with his hormones all the time. Don't worry you won't have to kick anyones ass. I'm not dating right now. This guy Mike Newton won't leave me alone. He always corners me after English. He's the son of the guy who owns the sporting goods store here in Forks and the quarterback of the football team so he thinks he's hot shit when in reality its his breath that smells like hot shit. I try not to vomit on him when he gets too close. I think you should study music. Do you play? I mean you seem to know a lot about music so I assume you do. BTW, here's a Christmas gift.
Bella
On Valentines day I was sitting in my English class depressed because I'd not heard from Edward since Christmas when the principal knocked on the door.
"Ms. Swan?" he said gruffly.
What had I done now?
"Yes, Mr. Varner." I said sitting up.
"This is not to happen again. I tried not to accept them but the delivery boy wouldn't take no for an answer. You're lucky this is your last class of the day." he said as a cart was wheeled in.
To my utter surprise there was a huge chocolate brown teddy bear with a large bouquet of red roses in his lap on the top on the cart. I walked over in shock.
"Whose it from?" I asked looking at him.
"Read the card!" a girl named Angela said from behind me.
Inside the bouquet was a small envelope so I pulled it out and opened it. It read in typed letters, "Happy Valentine's Day Bella. Love, Edward."
I smiled widely and turned to Angela who was begging me to tell her who it was from, "It's just a friend."
"Some friend." she said smiling while Mike Newton said in the back of the classroom obviously boiling.
When I got home there was a letter from Edward also.
Bella,
I hope you have gotten my surprise by now, if not, you will soon. Thank you for the downloads. You have eased my burden so much. I've been downloading any and everything I can get my hands on. Luckily, my iPod holds a lot of music. I'm glad Jacob has backed off, though he should keep a sock on it if he wants to keep his dick. As for this Mike kid, something about him irks me all ready. Keep an eye out for him Bella. I have a bad feeling about him. I know you can take care of yourself but I still worry about you. I'm starting my discharge paperwork. I'll actually be on a plane heading back to Chicago in June. I can't believe it. I'm going to go straight to New York in the fall. I've started the paperwork for my GI Bill also. That's kind of why I haven't written. I've been so busy getting all this done I haven't had time to sit down and write. I was wondering if maybe you'd like to meet up sometime over the summer before you go to Arizona and I go to New York. I'd love to actually meet you.
Edward
Oh, God... he wants to meet me.
"Dad!" I shouted as I ran through the house.
"What is it Bells?" he said jumping from his barkalounger.
"I was wondering if I could take a mini-vacation this summer... like maybe to Chicago?" I asked.
"Why Chicago?" he said sitting back in his chair.
"Well, I actually just finished reading this amazing book and it was set in Chicago. It talked about all the sites and the history and I wanted to go see it. It'd only be for like a week or two." I said quickly as I made up the lie hoping he'd believe me.
"We'll see Bells. It's a while yet." he said turning his attention back to the game.
I nodded and ran back to my room.