To say I was nervous would be the understatement of the century. My normally calm and collected stature had turned into an apprehensive teenager getting ready for prom. My hands wouldn't stop shaking, my stomach felt like it was about to erupt, and my head was pounding from the beeps of the airplane. What was I even supposed to say? How do I possibly express how sorrowful I am without sounding like a beggar on the street? What words do I use to ensure him I won't leave him again for the third time?
"This is your captain speaking... we shall be arriving in Tokyo in approximately thirty minutes. We will begin our decent within the next few moments. The seat belt sign will now be turned on. Once again, thank you for flying with us today." The captain muttered with a monotone murmur.
Shit, here we go. The thing about flying is you have no control. Your destiny lies within the captains hands, and nothing but two feet of metal stand between you and a forty thousand foot face plant onto soil. Quite frankly, I used to hate flying with Fitz on his campaign trail and most of the time convinced him to let me take the bus. Damn this man for making me fall in love with him and taking a damn 13 hour flight to Japan...My stomach began to heave as we began our decent... come on breathe. In, Out. In, Out.
*Flashback*
"Sweet baby?... Sweet baby?" I had never felt more betrayed in my life. He had tarnished his pet name for me with a young helpless girl who he asked me to destroy. I went after that girl and because of me she tried to committ suicide. He used my blind trust in him to obliterate someone's life. Hate, anger, and betrayel began to fuel the fire that was burning in my chest.
"How could you do that to me? You profess this undying and immaculate love for me... yet you screwed her and used MY NAME for her! MY NAME! It was ours... YOURS AND MINE!" I had began to shout, I must admit. I let my controlled and cool disposition leave me, and a fire breathing woman ignited my soul.
No. I was not going to think about Amanda, the betrayals, the heartbreaks, or the sleepless nights. I had hurt him just as badly as he had hurt me. We had both caused damage to our relationship, maybe even some irrevocable pretenses that we would never be able to fix. Yet, I had to still try. As I walked out to the terminal my phone began to explode with vibrations. 6 missed calls, 4 voicemails, 12 emails, and 16 texts all began to appear at once. ANOTHER REASON I HATE FLYING! Once I turn on my phone the damn thing nearly explodes, and I spend an hour catching up on everything I had missed.
Quickly scrolling through the texts and emails, I realized nothing really mattered right now. I simply needed to get to my hotel and wait for him to finish his meeting. Walking to the bag terminal I began to plan the I'm sorry, I love you, please take me back speech; erasing multiple lines in my head while adding ten more at the same time. My mind had gone to battle with itself in trying to find the one statement that could forever fix our relationship, however I soon realized there wasn't one. One statement couldn't fix a thousand sentences filled with hate. One minute could not fix a thousand minutes spent apart in different people's arms. One phone call couldn't fix sleeping alone by yourself at night. Yet one night... maybe one night could just do the trick. Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz.
"I just landed Cyrus. I'm about to pick up my car and drive to the hotel. What's the news on David?"
"Don't worry about that I'm handling it. As of right now Fitz is about a half hour from the hotel, so you two should be arriving at the same time. Just giving you the heads up… does he know your coming"
"I left him a voicemail telling him I was coming. He never called me back. I have to go Cy… I'll keep in touch."
"Okay. Talk soon Liv."
"Hey Cy?"
"Yeah?"
"Do not kill David. He is a good man."
"Yeah just like Lindsay was a good girl, and look where that landed us?"
"I am serious Cy. If you kill him I will unleash my pitbulls, and I have more than one."
"Hahaha. Okay Liv. I promise I will not kill David" Click.
Driving in Tokyo is a lot like driving in New York City, except everyone is driving in the opposite direction; instead of New York angry swearing you hear Japanese screeching. You see KIAs instead of yellow taxi's, and the smell of burnt rice instead of smoke and gas fills your nostrils. The pandemonium mixed with my anxiety, nausea, and pounding headache wasn't a good feeling. My stomach began to heave once again. I should have just gotten Huck to come with me and drive as I pulled up to turn into the hotel, I found myself blocked by 70 paparazzi. Shit, this really was not my freaking week.
"Huck, I need you to get someone to pick up my car. I left it about a block away from my hotel."
"On it. Did you survive the flight without throwing up?"
"I don't want to talk about it. I'll see you tomorrow evening. Can you keep an eye on David Rosen for me? Find out what he has been digging up on Quinn and check him out. Miss you Huck."
"See you soon Liv. I'll email you the details asap." Click.
After finally pushing my way through to get to the entrance, I was finally able to reach the entrance. Every time I walk into a Ritz, I never cease to be amazed. The exquisite décor ranging from the marble floors, maple tables, and crystal chandeliers are always candy to my eyes. Making my way to the front desk I pulled my confirmation number from my purse. As soon as I looked up I noticed that the front desk manager was speaking very quickly to the woman working the front desk. That must mean Fitz was almost here. Honestly I had been hoping to grab a bath or shower before I saw him to gather my final thoughts; unfortunately it looked like I wasn't going to be able to afford that luxury. After a few moments I made my presence knows and handed the girl my information. While she was pulling up my reservation I looked down the hallway and say several secret service agents filling through and "clearing" the area. SHIT. My stomach dropped and my nerves flew to record heights above Mount Everest. As soon as I saw sight of him I quickly forced my head to stare directly at the front desk woman. Maybe if I got lucky, he would just enter the elevator with me going unnoticed. Sadly, this wasn't my week though, and I could feel his eyes on me as my hands began to shake even more.
I pretended to search for my wallet in my purse and turned my back on the hallway he was located in. As I heard his footsteps approach me, I tried to clench my fists to stop the shaking.
"Playing coy never really suited you Liv." The way he said my name sounded like a caress, and instantly my hands were finally able to control themselves. I turned slowly and looked into his worn down gray eyes.
"Hi Mr. President, how is your stay in Tokyo treating you?" If I kept it simple, I would be able to get a better aspect on what sort of mood he was in.
"Fine, are you just getting in?"
"Yes my flight just arrived about an hour ago."
"Must be pretty important for you to come here, if you took the time to fly all the way out here. Are you working on a case?"
"Playing coy doesn't suit you Mr. President."
"Touche Livvie."
"Ma'am, you're in room 406, on the fourth floor. The elevators are located just down the hallway on your left. The pool is located just beyond them in case you were interested in swimming during your stay. The restaurant opens for breakfast at 6 and lunch begins at 12. Is there anything else I can assist you with?" The front desk woman said as she interrupted our conversation.
"No, thank you." I said as me and Fitz never broke eye contact.
"May I walk you to your room, Miss. Pope?" Fitz inquired with a smirk.
"You may, Mr. President." I grabbed my purse, while the secret service picked up my bag. He kept looking at me with as though I would disappear at any moment. I deserved that I suppose…he must not have received my voicemail. As we made our way to the elevator my phone started vibrating.
"Yeah?" I said as I looked at Fitz. Damn his eyes were a mighty fine shade of gray. Fitz grabbed my phone roughly and hung up.
"What the hell Fitz?" He pushed me into the elevator and waved his hand at the secret service. With a fiery look in his eyes, he walked towards me. I walked as far back as I could until my back touched the wall. This look meant one thing…and my hands suddenly began to shake.