Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers (2007) or Transformers: Generation 1.

Angela was Lillian's girlfriend at fourteen.

~0~

I can't even tell you how many searches on the internet I did after my experiment. Or, rather, how long I stayed on the computer. I was done with fooling around. I was getting a hold of myself. I was solving this sexuality business once and for all. To the pit with how long it took. I made a mental list ranging from impossible to possible to 'what the matrix is this?'

Impossible:

Heterosexual

Homosexual

Hypersexual

Hyposexual

Intersexual

Objectum Sexual

Pansexual

Polysexual

Semisexual

Trans

Possible:

Asexual - Still don't want/crave sex. Ratchet checked for system damage. Nada. :)

Bisexual - Only because I was attached to Angela at one point before becoming 'attracted' to Prowl and Jazz.

Carsexual - *Shrugs* I find certain alt modes appealing (not enough to have sex with or get aroused by). Why not add it?

Robosexual - Maybe this should be changed to 'Cybertronian' sexual or Cybersexual? Maybe it should just be Prowl/Jazz sexual. I've never been 'attracted' to other robots or any of the other transformers.

Queer (Hell, why not? I've got five others...)

WTM?

Demisexual - Maybe one day...? I don't know!

I pursed my lips before banging my head once against the table. I groaned, feeling a processor crash coming on. Why the hell did the being...or in this case bonded couple...that I am 'attracted' to have to be advanced robots from another planet that literally feed on pleasure? Maybe we could work out a once a year tradition or something? I snorted before violently banging my head again the table in front of me. Yeah right. Even Prowl's not that patient. Jazz sure as hell won't be. I sighed before rubbing my head with one hand. Ow. Maybe my next lesson should be restraint...with Prowl. Jazz may try it with flirting and I can't take that right now.

"Hey Lillian."

I looked up at Epps. "What's up?"

"Are you okay? You seem frustrated."

I imagine any person seen banging their head against a table would seem frustrated. "I am."

"Is it Sonya and Blaster?"

News travels fast around here. Then again, I did yell at Blaster and everyone should be aware of Sonya's condition... "Surprisenly, no. I'm just trying to wrap my head around this subject."

"What subject?" I stared at him. "It can't be that bad, can it? C'mon, show me the computer. Unless its porn. I really don't want to see that."

I snorted. "It's not that." I turned the computer. "Here. Read this."

He raised an eyebrow. "Demisexuality? How many sexualities are there at this point? I haven't been keeping track."

"As far as I know, there's fifteen."

"Damn girl." He read a few lines before turning the computer back. "No wonder your frustrated. I'm confused just reading that."

I smiled slightly. "Understandable."

"So..." I looked up at him. "Why are you reading about this? Do you plan on being the manager of a demisexuality website?"

"Not exactly. I'm just curious about sexuality is all." I rubbed my forehead again. "However, my curiousity is quickly leading to a processor ache."

"Be sure to head to Ratchet when it gets bad. I'm sure he could answer any questions you have about sexuality while you're in med bay."

Right. Mr have-sex-now-or-face-the-wrath-of-my-evil-wrench docbot? No way in the pit. "I will. Thanks, Epps." I looked down at the floor for a moment. "Hey Epps?"

"Yeah?"

"Where's Sonya?"

He blinked before looking behind him. "That's odd. I could've sworn she was right behind me..."
"Epps!" I screammed at him. "You can't leave her alone! What the hell?"

He laughed before holding up his hands. "Easy girl. I left her with Lennox for ten minutes. She'll be fine."

Two seconds later we heard a loud excited scream. It became apparent to us who the source was when Sonya rounded the corner...on a motorcycle...with a helmet. At least, she was on a motorcycle...She fell off mid turn. Luckily it wasn't a regular motorcycle and Elita 1 caught her. Sonya kept laughing until she saw me glaring at her. Lennox noticed and turned to look at me as he ran in. Prowl was right behind him.

"Fine, huh?" I snapped at Epps.

He held up his hands. "I didn't think-"

"You sure as hell didn't," I snarled. "And what the hell is wrong with you two?" I glared at Elita 1 and Lennox. "She has brain damage, for gods' sake! Do you want her to get further damage?"

"She was with me, Lillian," Elita answered calmly. "She was fine."

I crossed my arms. "Really? Because I don't classify falling off as being fine."

"I caught her," she said in self defense.

"I know. I saw. Did Ratchet clear this? Where is he? I'm reporting this."

"No need," Ratchet said as he walked in. "There's no need to be so upset, Lillian. I cleared it."

"You what?" All humans cleared the area as I started a showdown with Ratchet. Elita 1 left with Sonya in her hands.

"She is safe with any of the autobots."

"Ratchet, she fell off."

"Elita 1 caught her. Sonya trusts her. That's more than what I can say for you. Have you followed through on your medical order, yet?"

"Ratchet-" Prowl tried to warn.

"No I haven't," I snarled. "And I'm never going to. Let me repeat myself so that you can finally get it into your thick processor. Intercourse is not vital to my health."

"You need it," Ratchet argued back calmly. "Especially with the way you've been acting lately."

"I beg your pardon?" I said in a low tone of voice as I glared at him. My muscles tensed severely. On second thought, I can live with not punching Galloway. Ratchet, however...That idea is very tempting. More so than intercourse ever will be.

"You heard me. You've been even more moody than Blaster. You explode at everything." I didn't think it was possible, but my muscles tensed even more as I straightened up and glared at him. I was seething. It took me a full fifteen seconds to realize that Ratchet wasn't looking at me. By the time I did, it was too late. Ratchet laughed as I scrambled to close the laptop. "So that's it? Your making excuses for yourself to not have sex by looking up sexualities that don't even exist?"

"Ratchet," Prowl said sternly as my face burned and my body tensed severely again. My arms and hands shook and tears formed rapidly. "Stand down."

"You don't have authority over me, Prowl."

"Prime does," he shot back.

He snorted. "Oh please. You can't tell me that you actually believe in asexuality or demisexuality. Especially not when it comes to humans."

"It doesn't matter what I think." Really Prowl? Really? I think that hurt even more than Ratchet. "You have gone too far. Look at her."

"I am. She looks like she needs a decent overload with a spike."

"Frag you!" I growled as I tried, and failed, to control my emotions.

"Frag someone. I don't care who." I nailed Ratchet right in the back of the head with my wrench. "Lillian Wescott-" Ratchet started.

"Ratchet," Jazz growled from behind me. "Take a chill pill."

"There is no such thing."

"Then do as Prowl said an' stand down. Ya don' wan' ta go against us? Fine. But Optimus will not be happy 'bout this once he gets wind o' it. Ya know as well as Ah do that he does not tolerate a human in danger. Ya are endangering her right now."

"I'm not hurting her."

"Frag that," Jazz spat. "She's crying, you aft! Ya know that there are two types o' harm an' yer violating every emotional one there is."

Ratchet looked right at me before snorting. "Fine. But don't say I didn't warn you."

"Lilly," Prowl said as he leaned down. "He's gone. Lilly, please talk to us." I was curled into a ball. My back faced the air so Prowl and Jazz couldn't see my face. When someone touched my back I flipped out and scrambled away. "Lil-" Prowl said as if trying to reason with me.

"Don't touch me," I cried out. "Either of you." I buried my face in my knees as I wrapped my arms around my legs. I can't take this anymore. I thought that only humans had that sort of unaccepting attitude toward different orientations, but I guess I was wrong.

"Perhaps we should give her space," Prowl suggested.

"If we give 'er space somethin' bad's gonna happen," Jazz argued urgently. "She's broken. What happened? Ah only caught the end." Prowl replayed the whole event before Jazz facepalmed. "You idiot."

"What?" Prowl asked genuinely surprised.

"'It doesn't matter what Ah think?'" Jazz quoted. "Are ya mad? Forget the sexuality bit, that's low."

"What-?"

"Prowl, that's the equivalent o' saying that Ratchet was right an' that ya agree that a human can't be asexual."

"I do agree that a human can't be asexual."

"Excuse meh?"

"Only one percent of the human population claims to be asexual, Jazz. That's hardly a believable statistic."

"Who cares 'bout statistics? Prowl, ya jus' killed the femme."

"I believe Ratchet caused most of the emotional damage. And I did not kill her. She's sitting-" Prowl froze when he stopped arguing with Jazz. Jazz followed suit and looked where Prowl was looking. "Jazz?"

"Yeah?"

"Where's Lillian?"