XV: The Pain Reliever
There is a breeze here, soft and cool against my skin. I can't see where I am, because my eyes are closed and I'm too afraid to open them. I don't know why I'm so scared, but I can feel the fear coursing through me. My hands tighten around something cold and metal, and that's when I open my eyes. I look around and I'm on my balcony, standing just about to climb up, watching the world pass by 18 floors below. I take a deep breath and feel the air filter through my lungs and back out in a heavy exhale. The pounding of my heart makes me release the railing and I lift both hands, to my chest and press down against the skin, feeling the muscle working as it keeps me alive. I'm alive.
I smile widely and turn, running back into my empty apartment and I take it all in. I'm alive and I'm here, I'm not in Hell and Axel is no where to be seen. I touch the walls, feel their smooth texture and it makes me laugh. They aren't the rough, burning walls of the underworld.
There's relief, flooding my insides and a new appreciation for life. I know my parents hate me and I know I'll have to deal with paying my late rent but I'm alive. I won't be living in hell for an eternity, stuck forever with the same depression I struggled with all my life. I'm alive, and I can get better.
It must of all been a dream, a sign for me to reconcile with my brother. That thought gets me moving, rushing to pull open the door when I find it open, my brother standing on the other side. His eyes widen when he sees my ragged appearance, but he looks fine. Healthy and hopeful. He opens his arms wordlessly, tears starting to collect in his eyes and I throw myself at him, wrapping my arms around his shoulders and tugging him against my body.
"Roxas, I'm so sorry...for everything," He mumbles into the fabric of my shirt but I don't care. I hug him tighter, hold him closer, afraid that he'll disappear and I'll be left feeling empty and dead all over again. The warmth of his body comforts me, because no dream can ever feel this real. This has to be reality...I must have dreamt about being in Hell.
A horrible burning pain erupts from my arm and I stumble back from Sora, who is still staring at me, as I slowly lift my right hand and stare down at the missing chunk. There is nothing there but the burnt stub, black liquid oozing from the cracks in the charred flesh. I hold it up, cradle it with my good hand and start to scream. Rough, angry shouts, growling words leave my mouth and I sound possessed. I drop to my knees and look up at Sora, and he's watching me with disgust, as pain makes me dizzy, harsh wave after wave of it rippling under my skin.
My brother starts to laugh, his head falling back as insects start to crawl out from his mouth, the black bugs swarming down my brother's body but he doesn't stop. He cackles loudly, his voice echoing through my home and slapping me over and over. He drops, turning into a nest of tangled snakes, before they separate and slither towards me. The entire apartment goes up in flames and my eyes dart around the entire place as I realize this was the dream and Hell is my reality.
I can't describe the amount of pain because I'm sure no human being has experienced something as powerful as this. It's spread all through me and I can feel my bone burning like heated metal, inside my arm. I can hear it crackling and crunching as it forces its way past the burnt piece of meat. I watch it break through and my black blood gushes out through the hole, around my bone.
I try to find all the snakes, but realize everything has gone black. My brother is gone, along with my heart beat and working lungs. The air no longer passes through me, and the only place there is flowing blood, is my open wound. I feel the soft, moist sheets beneath me and my eyes struggle to focus. Where am I again?
"You're making a mess," The voice of the redhead makes me jump, and I roll off the mattress back onto the rocky ground, my bare feet already so used to the scorching earth, it no longer bothers me. Or maybe my arm is causing so much pain, I feel nothing else. I can barely form thoughts.
I don't want to look back down but I do anyway. There is skin and muscle growing around the exposed bone and the sight turns my stomach. I feel like I'm going to lose my mind as I drop to the ground and start rolling around, holding my arm to my chest and begging for it to stop but it doesn't. It gets worse, and worse and worse. Fucking, fuck, fuuuuuck.
"You know...I have a way to make it stop, until your arm grows back fully..." Axel's voice dances across the space between us and I've stopped mumbling just in time to hear him. I look up quickly from the ground, desperate for anything to take away the pain.
"What? Tell me, now!" I scurry over to him and grab his robe, the pain pulsing inside of me, making my vision start to fade to black. "FUCKING TELL ME NOW, DAMN IT!" This is the first time I've raised my voice at Axel, and in all honesty it's the first time I've felt the urge to strangle him. I can hear myself panting, though the sound is more like a growl than an inhale. Axel widens his eyes and smirks down at me, a few sharp teeth poke out and before I lunge at him and try to bite a chunk off his face, he answers.
"We can fuck." My face goes blank, and for a second not even the pain registers. All I can think about is what Axel just said. It grows like a tumour in my head, the concept pressing against the inside of my skull and filling my mind. Then the pain comes back with the force of a 500 foot tidal wave and I almost let myself drop and keep wriggling on the floor.
"Fuck me, just do it," I grind out through clenched teeth and Axel's eyes shine brightly, the green turning into a neon colour, like radioactive waste. He's upon me in seconds, tearing open the robe and pushing me against the wall. His hands explore my body, feeling everything he can and his burning touch excites me. The pain is gone and it's a huge relief. His lips attacks mine with the same intense hunger of a starved animal, his thin tongue curling around mine, pulling it into his mouth and swallowing every little whimper as he works my mouth with his.
I do my best to respond, to keep up with his quick, vicious actions but I can't. I just feel good. I feel too good to move, so I let him do whatever he wants. His mouth rips apart from mine and starts down my jaw, going to nip and bite my neck and shoulders, before he finally grips my thighs and pulls me up, making me wrap them around his waist.
"Aaah, aaaaah," I moan as his sharp teeth pierce my flesh, but no pain, just hot, delicious pleasure. My need aches for attention, and all I want is to feel more of Axel. I want it more than anything.
When I feel the bare skin of his legs, and take in how he's no longer wearing pants, I remember what exactly sex consists of, rather than just the good feelings and orgasms. I feel myself ready to back out, the words start rising up my throat and before I can shout no, he rams himself into me. I feel my flesh as it's pushed apart and I'm penetrated, a sting unlike any other burns up my spine, leaving me weak like a used candle wick. I flop back into the wall and open my mouth, ready to scream but it doesn't come out. Just a gurgled, low pitched curse.
He doesn't let me adjust, or wait for me to tell him to move. He does it all on his own, pulling out and shoving himself back in, forcing my body to loosen and take his entire length. His skin is on fire, finally all of him one temperature and I feel exactly the same. I'm warm all over, filled with Axel and for some reason, yearning for more. I want him to go harder, faster, deeper.
He knows my thoughts, and listens to me for once. He grabs my hips and thrusts upwards with all the power the demon overlord has in his being, which is quite a lot. I can't seem to make even the quietest sound, all I'm capable of right now is clawing helplessly at Axel as he pushes deeper into me, where I can almost feel him, pulsing under my belly button. My skin scrapes against the wall, but I don't feel any pain like I should. This rough, almost merciless pounding should be killing me, I should be sobbing for him to stop but instead, I'm biting my lip, trembling as sweat rolls off my skin. It just feels so fucking good.
I push back onto him and he likes it, because he smirks and throws his head back, moaning loudly and the fire flickering out from the walls, brightens, burning more furiously. That's all I see, before my eyes roll into the back of my head, Axel finally hitting my prostate and sending a sharp jolt of the most amazing pleasure I've ever felt in my entire life, right into my core. I gasp out, and Axel chuckles before he picks up the pace and keeps assaulting that one spot. My body starts to quiver, my legs losing their strength the longer he keeps going, until I feel like I'm going to drop and stop right before what will probably be the best orgasm ever.
Axel wraps his arms around my torso to keep me up, and keeps moving, but I don't think I can take anymore. My body tenses, my muscles clenching around him and I feel him shudder as I come harshly onto myself, my body twitching hard and I feel him pull out, and think it's going to end but he pushes right back in, only a little slower. I clench my eyes tight, feeling him easing in and out of me, making the orgasm drag on, my body still tense and trembling. My moans are almost shouts, and I can just tell Axel loves it. The heat from his body is the hottest I've ever felt it.
I feel like I'm going to die, which is weird considering I'm already dead. I'd have fallen to the floor in a clump of legs and arms if it weren't for Axel holding me up against the wall, and I wonder when the hell he's going to stop, when he's going to finish. I grab his face with my hand and make him look at me, his eyes burning into mine and the slits are almost invisible. He watches me for a while, before kissing me, biting my bottom lip, his sharp teeth going right through, making me groan deeply and finally he releases into me. It burns for a few seconds, and then it's all over. The redhead lets go of me and I drop to the ground, laying flat on my back.
I don't feel that intense need for Axel anymore and instead, I'm kind of ashamed, though I don't know why. I hear a portal opening up and I sit straight quickly, staring as Axel steps into the darkness, catching me watching him. "Where are you going?" I ask, reaching for my black robe and pulling it back on. He stays quiet, thinking for a moment before turning and leaving.
I look down quickly, ignoring the weird feeling in my chest and I stare down at my stump, which is still slowly growing. The new piece is a little thinner than the rest of my arm, but it's thickening with time. It no longer hurts, so I guess I made a good choice. It's a matter of easing my own suffering, and not giving a damn. I just have to get used to it and realize, this isn't earth. You'd think it'd be easier, but it really isn't.
I try to stand but my legs are really wobbly. I stumble over to the bed by some miracle and land on it with soft thump. The sheets are sticky with my blood and I make a face but have no energy to move. While I'm no longer in agony, I actually don't feel much of anything, besides the strange pressure in my chest. I concentrate, trying to figure it out but I give up after a while. I don't care. I just want to sleep, but I'm scared to dream. The feeling of seeing my brother, of having the hope that maybe I'll be able to console him and fix our relationship is so painful when ripped away. I felt him, I hugged him.
I move my eyes towards the crystal ball, and decide to check in on Sora.
A/N: Howdy ho, every body!
I hope this holds you all off until the next chapter! I promise, shit is going to go dooooown!
It'll be quite epic and it'll be a lot longer than this. Hand to God...-snicker-
Until then however, this is what you've got. Maybe if I tell you that in the next chapter y'all find out about Axel's visits to heaven, you won't kill me.
You can't kill me! You all need me to finish this!
Besides, as I've said before, it's not my fault! Blame Lily, she's the one who hates the internet.
-Sharmander