Seriously anybody want to Beta i am desperate. i finally got this written but be fair warned it is really bad... i have the next chapter in progress and it will be alot better i promise. don't give up one me. updates just haven't been frequent because of school.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Remus was pacing in his room. It had been one week since the full moon, and since he saw Tonks last. Being the worrying type of man that he was, he couldn't help feeling that she was mad at him for what he said the last time he saw her. It kept replaying in his head, every time he would seem harsher and she would seem more hurt in his minds eye. Tonight was another Order meeting and Tonks was going to be there. He was more nervous then when he took his O. in potions. He was going to see her. She was physically going to be in front of him. Sure she had been at the edge of his mind and in his dreams, but it wasn't the same.

His dreams of Nymphadora hadn't stopped. Actually they had become more frequent and more heated. He would wake at least once a night with the illusion of her lingering scent, and the feel of her skin on his, but they were just dreams. He had taken many journeys back down the alley with her, and every time they moved closer together, and progressed past just heated kisses. Some of his dreams were as innocent as holding her as she slept, or watching her play Frisbee with snuffles on a lawn. These dreams were just as satisfying, and heart warming. Her laugh echoed in his head almost every night, and her smile was mirrored on his face as he slept. Sometimes his imaginings seemed so real that he had to remind himself of the truth.

He continued to pace and mutter in his room phrases like

"too old." and

"just dreams" were occasionally audible. Sirius stood at the door watching his friend pace he heard the words

"Not yours" and

"Hates you anyways."

"What in Merlin's name are you muttering about Moony?" Remus stopped dead in his tracks and turned to seen Sirius standing in his door way.

"How long were you there Padfoot?" He started pacing where Lupin was previously mimicking him. He was muttering incoherently like Lupin had been.

He stopped in front of Remus.

"I was here for that much. He gave his winning smile, but Remus remained un-amused. He rolled his eyes at Remus and left the room shaking his head.

As he left he shouted over his shoulder, "Meeting in fifteen minutes Moony."

He made his way down to the meeting after some more pacing. He entered the kitchen with all the other Order members. They all sat to await the beginning of the meeting. He looked up and down the table a few times but didn't see any outrageously colored hair. He was sitting next to Sirius who was always moped during meetings. Snape wouldn't miss any chance to taunt Sirius. Dumbledore's entrance quieted the chatter of the room. McGonagall sat to his right and he started the meeting.

Remus focused on Albus and his resent news, but still was curious as to where Tonks was. Within five minutes he had his answer. A loud thud sounded from upstairs and the screams of Mrs. Black started up. Everyone let out a simultaneous sigh as they all knew it was Tonks. Sirius gladly stood to help his cousin silence the screeching witch. Lupin tried to ignore the slight rise in heart rate. This was a meeting for the elect members of the Order of the Pheonix, and he couldn't even get a hold of himself at the thought of her being here. He had a serious problem.

The sound of the screaming painting stopped, and the sound of approaching feet in the hallway drew nearer. He heard the door open behind him and refused to put himself through the sweet torture of seeing her.

"It was the carpet this time." Sirius announced to the order. Remus could see in his minds eye the brief moment of blush that was appearing on her face, before it seemingly disappeared as muffled amusement sounded through the people sitting down. No one ever saw it she always pushed it back faster than it took for people to notice, but Remus couldn't help but notice every reaction on her face and commit it to memory.

She laughed along with the rest of the group and sat down a few seats away from him, next to Charlie and Bill. For the life of him he couldn't understand why the sight of her made his hands feel moist. Out of the corner of his eye he could see the same face framed with short spinky pink hair and it caused his palms to sweat. He was acting foolish, like an adolescent boy. He was a grown man he should be able to handle these feelings. The meeting continued with not much news to report. The same quiet offence was being played by Voldemort and the discreet defense was being executed by them. The department of mysteries roster was rattled off and Harry's guard was assigned. Dumbledore told them their next step was to put surveillance on know death eaters. They couldn't just let his army grow; they needed to lock down on the death eaters at large. Snape sat a little straighter, puffing out his chest when Dumbledore mention his contribution to the hunt for death eaters. Dumbledore gave a warning to watch for Death eater tails.

"Many of us have reported a suspicion or an actual instance where we were followed by a member of the death eaters. It has most recently occurred to Nymphadora and Remus." The comment was off hand and no one really paid much attention to it, but it made Remus blush a deep scarlet. Just remembering that night and how they had avoided the death eaters.

"I caution you all to keep up your guard." With that they ended the meeting. Molly brought out some dinner and plates. Everyone helped themselves to large servings of everything. The only people to leave were Mundungus, who was watching Harry, Mad-eye, who was on guard duty tonight and Snape. Sirius remained in his seat grumbling for a bit about how useless he felt, but soon was cheered by the idea of Molly's food. Molly had gone to get the kids for dinner while everyone was in a mad dash to get some of the divine food. Remus was patiently waiting in the back of what he assumed was a line, but just looked like a mob of people.

"Hey there stranger." That voice, oh that voice. It had haunted him for the past week. He turned to see the now bright blue hair framing Tonks' face. "How have you been?"

"Hello Nymphadora." She gave up trying to set him straight with the name. Instead she just rolled her eyes and laughed.

"You haven't answered the question professor. How are you?"

"I thought the teacher was supposed to be asking the questions." she rolled her eyes again and they both laughed.

"I'm fine Tonks. How have you been?"

"Eh can't complain."

"Oh I'm sure you could if you tried." She raised an eyebrow

"Well there is this bloke who completely ignored me for a whole bloody week. I guess he just decided he was too high and mighty to talk to me."

"Tell me who this prat is. I'll set him straight." He retorted. She giggled and it brought a small smile to his face seeing her like this. Or even just seeing her at all made him smile. The way she was talking to him and making light conversation meant that she wasn't angry at him for being rude the morning after the full moon. He knew it was a silly thing to fret over, but he had been worried that he hurt her feelings in some way and that she would be mad or awkward around him. He really didn't want that. He had unclear feelings. At times he wouldn't want to be near her seeing as she drew such mixed emotions from him. So he would mope and decide to distance himself from her, but it didn't work.

They piled their plates with food and sat down next to each other letting the conversation flow. They settled so easily into each others presence.

"So any excitement while I was working?" she asked him.

"Unless you consider surveillance on Knockturn Alley exciting, no."

"Sounds better than doing paper work all week."

"Oh you're absolutely right. Following around brutal unshaved, unwashed witches and wizards is much more fun." The room seemed to be empty with only them two when he was talking to her. No one else was really important. He liked how her hair subtly changed color while she spoke if she was happy, or angry, or any mood really. He noticed how when she started talking about her mom her features would sharpen slightly and she would resemble her black heritage a bit more. These little changes amused him and kept his eyes glued to her face. But really he liked to just look at her no matter what shape her face was in. They settled into easy conversation on anything and everything.

She knew it was a touchy subject, so she danced around the topic of the full moon last week. She figured that he didn't really like when people saw him like that. She remembers how she felt that night as she heard him go through the pain. She remembers the urge that hit her to come to the house that night. She couldn't find the words to explain the urge. She just couldn't stand the thought of him alone that night. In the morning she visited him. She could tell he was embarrassed to have her witness him the morning after, but all she could see was the bravest man she had ever known, recovering from his monthly trauma.

All week all she could see in her minds eye were snippets of him. His smile, his hair, his eyes. Those damn eyes, just the thought of them made her knees weak. An ache would form in her when she thought of him. It was an ache that she couldn't put into words. She still thought that she was crazy for developing feelings for this man after such a short time, but once she would start thinking about him she would think it was crazy not to have feelings for him.

As she talked to him over their food she noticed little things that she didn't have the time to notice before. The way he had to put down anything in his hand so he could explain something with little hand gestures and funny little hand movements. The way he listened, he would always keep eye contact with you just so that you know he is hanging on every word that falls out of your mouth. The cute little twitch he got in his cheek when he was on the verge of laughing. When his hair would fall into his face he would first try to blow it out of his eyes before using his hands to smooth it back. He wasn't using a wand, but she was entranced.

Sirius came over and tapped both of them on the shoulders to get their attention.

"Hey you two love birds, Dumbledore wants to see you guys upstairs in the library." They both gave him a glare.

"He probably wants to scold you guys for your flagrantly flirting in headquarters."

"Bugger off Sirius." They said in unison. He raised his hand in defense and looked for someone else to entertain him.

They dumped their plates in the kitchen sink and headed upstairs together. Lupin dreaded the awkward silence that snuck between them as they walked up the stairs. Damn Sirius. Why the hell did he have to say that and ruin everything? What in the blazes was he suppose to say to her now?

"Sorry about Sirius, I'm pretty sure he doesn't have a filter in his brain." Well at least he said something. She huffed in amusement.

"I didn't think he had a brain." Yes. He felt the uncomfortable atmosphere slip away and the friendly one return.

They reached the door to the library which Remus held open for her. Dumbledore was running his fingers along the bindings of the books in the shelf vaguely smiling at nothing in particular.

"Remus, Nymphadora, thank you for coming up."

"What are we needed for Professor?" asked Tonks.

"You see Nymphadora I am assigning teams to look into reported Death Eater actions. Obviously Severus is a team of one, but I need more members reporting on death eaters actions."

"How can we be of help sir?" Lupin asked. Dumbledore's smile widened and he moved his gaze form the shelves to the two people standing in front of him.

"I was going to ask if you two would be a team and go on these missions together, seeing as you two work so wonderfully together." Dumbledore inwardly laughed at the blush that crept onto both of their faces. It had always been easy to make the shy werewolf redden, but he hadn't ever known the boisterous metamorphagus to blush.

"Of course sir." Tonks answered for the both of them.

"Splendid. That's all I wanted of you. You can finish your dinner. I'm very envious of the cooking abilities Molly possesses and I'm sure we all want to enjoy it."

Remus made to leave, but Tonks stayed behind.

"I'll be right down Remus." She explained when he flashed her a look of questioning. His light foot steps were heard as he made his way back down to the kitchen.

"Sir?" Tonks timidly approached the great wizard who had diverted his attention back to the dusty books.

"Yes Ms. Tonks."

"Umm, well I was wondering if I could ask you a question?"

"Questions are always welcome."

"Oh, well you see I have this friend. She's really brilliant, and I think she would be useful to the order. So I was wondering if it's at all possible to recruit her?" Dumbledore met her eyes with kindness and his usual twinkle.

"Nymphadora. I'm sure that your friend is wonderful and intelligent just as you are, but we need to be careful about who is admitted into the Order." Tonks looked down at her feet.

"Not to insult your friend in any way, but we have been betrayed before, and I can't take chances this time. I can only invite people I am positive will remain loyal."

"Oh you won't have to worry about her loyalty sir, she's a Hufflepuff." He shook with silent laughter.

"That is a nice sentiment Nymphadora, but need I remind you that our betrayer last time was a Gryffindor." Tonks bit her lip debating whether she should tell him why she wanted to join. It would most definitely insure her trust, but it was very personal.

"Professor I can swear for her loyalty." He gave her a caring gaze.

"Its touching that you will vouch for her. That is a sign of true friendship, but the information we posses is very sensitive." He put a hand on her shoulder. She had one more card to play to get Caelyn Dumbledore's trust.

"Professor, this friend of mine went to Hogwarts. Her name is Caelyn Redman. She is a fourth year healer student and she lost her mother in the first war." Dumbledore's eyes widened slightly in recognition.

"I will look in to it." he said with a smile playing at the corners of his lips. He obviously remembered the kind and loyal girl.

"Thank you Professor." He smiled brightly. She left the room and headed downstairs towards the muffed commotion of the kitchen.

When she entered said kitchen her eyes were met with a sea of blazing red hair and freckled faces. Fred and George were easily recognizeable. And Charlie and Bill were familiar faces, but there were two there that Tonks had never met before. There was a tall gangly boy and a young, pretty girl. The twins and the tall boy, whom Tonks assumed was Ron, were talking and laughing very loudly with Sirius. And knowing Sirius it wasn't about anything appropriate. The girl was casually talking with Charlie and Bill. She fit right in with her brothers, but Tonks could tell that she was getting bored and a little uncomfortable with what ever the men were talking about. Tonks decided to save the poor girl from the torture of 'man talk'.

"Wotcher!" Tonks greeted all three of them. The girl cocked her head to the side in confusion.

"Hey Tonks." Bill greeted. The girls face changed to an expression of excitement.

"So what testosterone filled subject are you boring this poor girl with boys?" they all chuckled.

"Tonks this is our sister Ginny." Charlie gestured to the young girl.

"Wotcher I'm Tonks."

"Hi." Ginny greeted Tonks with a smile.

"So what are these thick skulled men talking about?" Ginny giggled as her brothers glare at Tonks.

"Just some girl." Ginny answered.

"Oh? Do pre-tell Mr. Headboy. This surely can't be a girl in the romantic sense." Bill glared.

"And why not?" he asked.

"Bill. Look at yourself, you're hideous." There was a brief moment of silence and then all four of them burst into laughter. They all settled into easy conversation. Tonks had saved Ginny from the awkward 'talk about girls'. They talked about quidditch mostly. Ginny apparently was an amazing chaser and a descent seeker. Tonks gathered that Ginny was practically one of the guys. She was so easy going and chattered casually with her brothers. Tonks liked her she wasn't prissy or snooty or anything like a lot of girls. Eventually Ginny and Tonks just started to talk to each other and the boys broke off into their own conversation. Ginny was amazed by Tonks' ability to morph and would laugh at her silly noses. Tonks imitated some people for Ginny including Bill. Tonks flipped the long red hair dramatically which threw Ginny into a new fit of giggles.

"So Ginny pretty girl like yourself must have a flock of boys following you around." The young girl blushed slightly.

"No not really."

"Oh now that's a lie." Ginny flushed deeper red. Desperate to change the subject she asked,

"What about you Tonks? Have any candidates?" Ginny wiggled her eyebrows. Tonks smiled at the girl. At that very moment she heard a laugh. Not just any laugh. This was a light soulful laugh that she dreamed about. This was the laugh that she worked so hard to cause. It was his laugh. If you weren't listening for it you wouldn't have heard it, but her senses were super reactive to anything and everything Lupin. She had to force herself to continue looking at Ginny to answer her question with a joking tone.

"I'm afraid the love life of an auror is nonexistent." Tonks kept eye contact with Ginny not wanting to look his direction and give way her little secret. She knew that he was smiling and that she was missing it, but drooling over him wouldn't be too smart with the crowd they were around right now.

It had gotten late and Tonks was still talking to Ginny. She was such a great kid. She was wise beyond her years, but very playful. Growing up with all brothers gave her an air of toughness. She was witty and funny. Tonks really enjoyed talking to her. She was very intrigued with Tonks being an auror. She asked loads of questions and was very eager to hear the answers. All too soon it was well past mid night. Molly shooed all her children off to bed, including Bill and Charlie.

"I best be heading out." Tonks announced through a yawn. She stood too quickly and felt herself sway unstably. Molly rushed over to her.

"Oh dear, you're far too tired to go home right now. Stay the night."

"No, no I-I should go home." Molly put her hands on her hips stubbornly.

" You are in not shape to go home. You are staying here and that is final." She tried to protest, but a sudden warm feeling spread through her body when Lupin placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Tonks, listen to Molly. You can take the room across from mine again." She nodded and followed Lupin up the stairs. She felt like she had neglected him most of the night.

"So we will be seeing more of each other I suppose." She heard him through a haze of tiredness. His arm remained around her to keep her steady as the climbed the stairs.

"Mmmmnn." She responded.

"These missions seem very high risk."

"Hmmmnn." "Are you even listening to me Nymphadora?"

"Don't call me Nymphadora." She mumbled. He smiled down at her. They reached her bedroom.

"I saw you and Ginny were talking. She has been dying for another girl to talk to."

"I was happy to get to know her. She's a great kid." She slurred. He nodded in agreement.

"What did you girls talk about?" he lead her into the room

"A lot of things, quidditch, my job, school, boys and so on." She sat down on the bed while he went to the closet to get some clean linen.

"For your sake I hope Molly didn't hear you talk about boys." Tonks smiled to her self as she stood and walked towards the man facing away from her.

"I hope for your sake Molly didn't hear it."

"Oh? And why is that." When he turned he was surprised at how close she was. She was a mere foot from him. Her tired eyes showed their usual mischief.

"Ginny might have mentioned that she has a thing for professors." She moved closer to his shocked face.

"I guess that's something we have in common." He swallowed hard. She stepped back enjoying the sight of him flustered.

"I-Uh-I'll just make your bed real quick so you can get some shut eye." He made quick work, while she went to the bathroom and changed into a set of pajamas that she had left here. Tonks knew that if she was fully awake she would have been thoroughly embarrassed about her earlier comment, but right now she was too tired to care. The bed was made when she walked back into the room, and Lupin was folding down the blankets for her. A sly smile crossed her face as she walked up behind him. Lupin nearly jumped out of his skin when her arms encircled him from behind.

"Thank you Remus." She let go and climbed into the bed. He shook himself, trying to get rid of the feeling of having her body pressed to his. He needed to get out of the room. He headed for the door. Stopping at the threshold he looked over his shoulder at the sleeping woman. She was curled around a pillow with her hair sprawled in a fan around her face.

"Good night Nymphadora." "Night Remus." He watched a few more seconds as she slid into a peaceful sleep before he left for his own room.

Good merlin its finally up. please review.. AND IF ANYONE WANTS TO BETA I WOULD BE VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY GRATEFUL! plsplsplsplsplspls PM me