"Hmph. Vat-grown. Ain't a patch on the real thing." Zaeed jabbed at the gravy-covered meat on his place. He sighed. "Now, there's an animal. Bloody huge birds, turkeys. Ugly as sin, too. I ever tell you about the time I pulled gaurd duty on the embassy's annual turkey shipment?"
There was a chorus of groans down the mess-hall table, which the old merc blithely ignored. "It was back in '64, and the embassy was doing one of those damned multi-cultural events. Nothing but the best for the bloody politicians, so they had live birds shipped from earth.."
He idly poked the cranberry sauce. It wobbled. "Wouldn't you know, the whole flock escaped from the hold? And someone had to track 'em all down. Still have scars to this day."
Miranda stared at him flatly. "From turkeys."
"Have you SEEN a turkey? They're bloody huge!" Zaeed curled his lip at her. "I'll have you know I was the only one that made it out alive."
He paused a moment.
"Well, out of 'me and the turkeys', anyway."