I was standing in front of full length mirror making sure I looked alright. It was almost 4 and I knew Eli would be here soon. I had on black jeans with knee high boots and a floral top with a blue cardigan. I curled my curls a little more and put a flower clip in my hair.

By time I was downstairs it was 4. As I was grabbing my purse I heard a knock on the door. I turned off the lights and opened the door to walk out.

"Hey Eli" I smiled at him.

"Hey Clare" he leaned in and kissed my cheek "You look beautiful" he whispered before pulling away. My cheeks burned red as we walked to his car.

"So where are we going?" I asked as we started driving. He smirked but kept his eyes on the road.

"I can't tell you it's a surprise." He was still smirking which caused me to wonder where he really was taking me.

"So what were the kids doing?" he changed the subject.

"Well they were spending the evening with my mom. She's taking them out to dinner and probably going to spoil them." I told him with a chuckle.

As I was about to say something else I saw we came to a stop in front of a gate that said no trespassing.

"Uh Eli what are we doing here?" I looked at him in confusion.

"Wait here" he said before getting out and going to the gate. I saw him play with the lock until it opened and he pulled the gate open far enough for his car to fit through. He got back in the car and proceeded to go through the gate.

"Eli that sign says no trespassing" he could hear the worry in my voice as he drove up a dirt road.

"I know I put it up." Why would he put a sign up like that? Before I could ask I saw what we were driving towards. It was an old abandoned church. It actually looked really cool. It was surrounded by big open fields. Eli stopped the car and got out. He opened the door for me and took my hand.

"Eli this place is amazing. Did you find this?" I walked toward the church and stood where it looked like an alter should be. Eli came and stood next to me looking at the broken glass window.

"Yup I found it when I was 17. I was just driving around and I came across the gate. It opened it and drove through and found it. I later looked it up. This use to be a catholic church before it burned down. I come here whenever I need to be alone or just want some peace."

This place was so beautiful in a broken kind of way. As I admired some of the broken statues, Eli walked back to his car and pulled out a basket. I walked over to him curious as to what he was doing. He pulled a blanket out of the basket and I helped him lay it out.

"I figured it's such a beautiful day that we could have a picnic."

I smiled at him as I sat down across from him watching him pull stuff out of the basket. He handed me a chicken caser wrap which is my favorite. I looked up at him and he was smiling.

"I talked to Lidia today during study hall she told me they were your favorite."

I took a bite and closed my eyes, feeling my taste buds tingling with goodness.

"Thank you Eli this is so good." He stood up and walked to his car. He turned on the radio and turned up the volume so we could hear it.

"Is this alright?" he asked making sure I didn't mind the music.

"It's perfect."

We continued to eat and talk. So far this was going perfectly. As I finished my wrap I saw him reach into the basket and pull out the grapes.

"Open your mouth" he said while opening the bag of grapes.

I raised my eyebrows confused. "I'm going to throw a grape in your mouth" he explained. I shrugged my shoulders and opened my mouth. I heard him say ready, set, and go before I moved my head to catch it. I chewed and swallowed, smiling at his amused face.

"My turn" I took the bag and with a devilish grin through the grape at his face not even aiming at his mouth. I started laughing because it bounced off his forehead.

"That was not even close to my mouth" he said in between laughing. I was still laughing that I hadn't even noticed he grabbed a handful of grapes and started throwing them at me. I tried shielding my face until I started picking them and throwing them back. I stood up and ran as he chased me. It's hard to run in these shoes so it wasn't hard for him to catch up to me. He grabbed me around my waist and pulled me close to him. As our laughter started dying down I turned and faced him. Just than one of my favorite songs came on the radio.

"Oh I love this song" I yelled. He smirked and looked down at me. "Well would you like to dance?" he grabbed my hand and walked back towards his car.

He placed one hand on my hip and I put one on his shoulder. He held my other hand and started moving slowly. We moved to the music and he even spun me a few time. At the end of the song he dipped me and brought me up close to his chest. "I want to show you something" he whispered. I nodded and followed him as he picked up the picnic stuff and got in the car. We drove only a few minutes until stopping again at a cemetery.

I saw the sadness on Eli's face and was unsure of what to do. He opened the door for me and took my hand but this time he gripped it and didn't let it go. "I want you to meet someone" I smiled weakly and followed him.

We stopped at a head stone that read R.I.P Imogen Moreno. "This was Imogen, my fiancé."

I was immediately taken back.

"3 years ago she died of cancer. We were supposed to get married that summer. The doctors told us that she would be ok in time to get married and live a happy life."

He dropped to his knees and cried. I bent down and hugged him. I felt it start to rain but I didn't care.

"2 month before we were getting married, the doctor told us the cancer came back and this time it was worse. He said he gave her 6 weeks. But she didn't even make that. She died 3 weeks after the doctor told us she had 6. I held her in my arms as she took her last breath."

He cried in my shoulder as it started to downpour. "Eli I'm so sorry." I held him until he was a little calmer.

"Clare I told myself that I would never fall for anyone again because I didn't want to be hurt again. But she came to me in my sleep last night. Imogen did. She told me that I needed to keep living even though she's dead. She said I need you like you need me but I'm just so afraid you'll leave me."

I cupped his face kissed him. He wrapped his arms around my neck and pulled me close. I pulled away and hugged him. "I'm not going anywhere Eli." I whispered in his ear.

/-/-/

Once Eli was calm enough he drove us back to his apartment. He kept apologizing for his breakdown and causing me to get soaked because of the rain.

"Eli it really it ok. I'm glad you told me." He let me wear a pair of his sweat pants and shirts while mine were in his dryer.

He sat next to me and handed me a coffee. I bit my lip and looked at him.

"Are you alright?" he asked getting concerned.

"I put my coffee down and looked at him. "I want to tell you about Jake."

He put his coffee down as well and moved closer to me.

I took a deep breath "Jake and me started dating in 8th grade. It was one of those childish relationships though. Things didn't get serious until the end of sophomore year. Over that summer Jake really changed. He got into drugs and was always partying. He started to get extremely violent with me. I told him if he didn't stop I would leave him even though I really loved him."

Jake raped me when I was 17. I told him no but he hit me and kicked me until I gave up the fight. He told me if I ever told anyone he would make next time much worse." I took a deep breath before continuing.

"I soon found out I was pregnant. I was terrified but he was excited. He wanted a family and to be a daddy. He forced me to marry him and move in with him when I was17."

While I was pregnant Jake treated me like a princess. He acted like a real boyfriend. Like the guy I fell in love with. Even after Lidia was born he treated how I should be. A few years later we had Mason and it all seemed perfect. We all loved each other again."

I took a sip of my coffee and wrapped myself in Elis arms that held me tightly.

"But then Jake started using again. He would come home at midnight drunk or stoned. He started to get violent with me again but only when the kids weren't around. When they were he acted perfectly normal. He didn't want to disappoint Lidia because he truly did love her. But when they weren't home he'd be smoking a bong or shooting up.

"That day he got caught was one of the happiest days of my life. I knew I was free of his torture and this forced love. But my kids don't know the whole story and they're in pain. They want their daddy."

I looked at Eli who had a tear roll down his cheek.

"I'm so sorry Clare. None of that stuff should have happened to you, none of it. I know that your kids are too young to know the truth now but when they do learn it they will understand. I know they will."

I wiped the tear away from his cheek. "I was so afraid to love someone again because I don't want to be hit or raped on a daily basis. I don't want to be lied to again and be used for my body. I don't want to be hurt mentally or physically."

Eli grabbed my head and pressed his forehead to mine. "Clare I promise I would never hurt you. Ever. Just like Imogen told me, you need me like I need you. We need each other. I promise I'll take care of you."

And I know he will.

Alright so that was a crappy chapter but I promise updates will be a lot sooner so please review. Happy Holidays!