TODAY'S EPISODE: RISE OF SUPER EGGPLANT!
The title of this episode is a lot more meaningful than it looks. *cough cough* acronym! *cough cough*
On an entirely related note, this chapter is dedicated to Rose Hunter, who not only suggested this but is also turning 13 today! Yaay! Let's all wish her a happy birthday! So, if you have time, just go to her profile, and PM her saying "Happy Birthday!" or something similar. Happy birthday Rose, hope you like your episode!
Dr. Doofenshmirtz was in the garage, working on a new invention, when Perry looked in through the doorway.
"Grrrrr," he said, which probably meant, "Hey Doofenshmirtz, whatcha doin'?"
"Oh, nothing, Perry the Platypus, just working on a new invention," said Doofenshmirtz. "You know, in the future, we won't exchange greetings whenever we meet someone. Instead, evil aliens will devour us in acts of canniballism. Just a little something to look forward to."
Suddenly, a rabbit hopped out of Perry's hat.
"Finished!" said Doofenshmirtz, ignoring the rabbit. "Behold, Perry the Platypus, the ANIMATINATOR!"
"Grrrr?" asked Perry, which probably meant, "What does it do?"
"Simple," said Doofenshmirtz. "All I have to do is shoot something with it, and it will be animated to life!"
"Grrrrr?" asked Perry, which probably meant, "And why would you want a contraption like that?"
Doofenshmirtz shrugged. "Plot purposes?"
Meanwhile, on the other side of the Tri-State Area, a certain triangle-faced kid and his certain green-haired brother were eating breakfast at the dinner table. Did I mention it was lunch time?
"Hey Ferb," said Phineas. "I know what we're gonna do today! We're gonna eat this eggplant!"
"Why?" asked Ferb.
"I don't know," Phineas shrugged. "Plot purposes?"
Suddenly, a huge lazer beam shot through the window and hit the eggplant!
"What was that?" asked Phineas.
Suddenly, the eggplant began to move in Phineas's hands, and its eggplantshell was ripping apart until it had three rips which resembled two eyes and a mouth.
"Where is the stillness of the plant? The motionlessness of the eggs?" asked a voice which seemed to be coming from the rip that looked like a mouth. "It all hurts… All there is is pain. Pain and cheese!"
Phineas looked at Ferb. Ferb shrugged.
"Cheese!" shouted the eggplant. "CHEESE!"
"Oops," said Doofenshmirtz. "I may have accidentally misfired."
"Grrrrrr," said Perry, which probably meant, "You have terrible aim, D."
Suddenly, Rick extended his computer thingy over to them. "Team, I have some bad news," he said.
"What is it, Rick?" asked Doofenshmirtz.
"Grrrr," said Perry, which probably meant, "'Sup, Ricky?"
"Rickardo," said Doof.
"Grrr," said Perry, meaning, "Rick-Roller."
"Ricktamundo."
"Grrrr (Rickalator)."
"Rick-"
"Okay, enough already!" shouted Rick, exasperated. "Anyway, it appears your animator ray has accidentally hit an eggplant and put it on a rampage."
"How do you know that?" asked Doofenshmirtz.
"Here's a conversation I picked up from the city's telephone lines," said Rick.
A recording of a female teenage voice came out of Rick's sound-thingy. "So then," it said, "The eggplant started freaking out, yelling about cheese, and I was like, 'Phineas and Ferb, you are so BUSTED!' and they were like, 'But Candace, we didn't do it, we swear!' and I was like, well who ELSE would bring an eggplant to life?'!"
Rick stopped the recording."We need to get over there and put a stop to it before something bad happens."
"Okay, where is it?" asked Doofenshmirtz.
"It's somewhere on the other side of the Tri-State Area," said Rick. "A little town called DanVille."
"Eggy! Eggy, calm down!" shouted Phineas.
"CHEESE!" shouted Eggy, Phineas's new name for the eggplant. "CHEEEEEEEESE!"
Then, Eggy jumped up and flew out the window, shouting "!"
Suddenly, the Flynn-Fletcher family, except for their parents, who were at the antique store, heard a siren outside.
"Oh no, now what have you done guys?" said Candace, insisting on pinning this on them.
Suddenly, the door was kicked open and a tall gy with spiky hair, a pointy nose, and karate robes walked in.
"Surrender the eggplant and nobody gets hurt!" he shouted.
"It jumped out the window," said Phineas. "Sorry."
"Darn it!" said the man, using the kids' show equivalent of cursing. "Come on Perry, let's go after it."
And then he went back outside and began pulling a rickshaw that appeared to have a platypus in it and a siren on top.
"That was weird," said Candace.
Doof 'N' Puss arrived at a cheese factory, where an eggplant-shaped hole was in the front door. Perry and Doofenshmirtz walked in and surveyed around. Knocked-out cheese factory workers lay all over the floor, each of them sporting cartoonish eggplant-sized bumps on their heads.
"Eggy was here," said Doofenshmirtz.
"Grrrr?" said Perry, which probably meant, "Eggy?"
"What?" asked Doofenshmirtz. "That's what the kid named it! Come on, let's just get that plant."
Perry and Doofenshmirtz walked along the halls of the cheese factory, where strange, cheese-making machinery churned and groaned as they walked through.
Then, Doof and Perry turned a corner and found an eggplant munching hungrily at a mountain of cheese.
"I don't remember eggplants being so big," noticed Doofenshmirtz.
And he was, of course, right, for this eggplant was easily the size of a large dog, and growing bigger by the second.
"Cheese…," it growled. "Cheeeeese…."
"Hold it right there, cheese-eating eggplant thing!" shouted Doofenshmirtz.
The eggplant turned to look at them, then quickly scooted through the cheese away from them.
"We're not gonna let him get away! Come on, Perry the Platypus, let's use our TEAM EFFORTS COMBINED!"
Rick began playing some 80's action music as Perry triple-somersauted onto a mountain of cheese just above the eggplant, and Doof used his Kung-Fu skills to leap over it and land right in front of it.
The eggplant made a sound of surprise and turned aound, but not before Perry and Doofenshmirtz leaped at it from both sides!
It looked as though our heroes had won, but suddenly: WHAM! Doofenshmirtz was hit in the face by a giant purple fist! POW! Perry was knocked out of the way by a purple foot!
Doof 'N' Puss looked up at the eggplant, and were surprised to see that it was quickly sprouting arms and legs!
"Hahaha!" laughed the plant in a deep voice. "Give up now! The more cheese I consume, the more powerful I become! Soon, I will be unstoppable!" The eggplant grabbed a bunch of cheese and ran away, arms, legs, and body growing as it consumed more cheese.
"That," said Doof," was not good.
"Grrrrr," said Perry, which probably meant, "No, you think?"
Eggy sniffed the air of DanVille Park. "Cheese…," he muttered. "Must find cheese…"
Suddenly, a smell caught his nose. "CHEEEEEEESE!" he shouted and ran in the direction of the smell. It was so astonishing, so much cheese! "Cheese… cheese…," he growled. "Where is the cheese?"
And then, he saw it. A huge wheel of cheese being rolled down the street for the Cheese Parade.
"CHEEESE!" he shouted, leaping across straight into the wheel.
"Well that's peculiar," said Lawrence, coming out of the antique shop. "There seems to be a giant eggplant sticking out of the cheese wheel."
And giant eggplant there was, for the thing must have been six feet tall by now, and growing rapidly. Rips began appearing in the cheese wheel as the plant outgrew its constraints, until suddenly, the wheel exploded in a cheesy mess of shredded cheese!
"CHEEEEEEEESE!" shouted the eggplant over the screams on the receding crowd.
"Lawrence, quick, let's get out of here!" shouted Linda as the freaked-out people ran past them.
"Wait, he seems like a nice guy," said Lawrence as the eggplant roared in triumph, its eyes glowing a deep red-violet.
"How do we defeat this thing?" asked Doofenshmirtz.
"Grrr!" said Perry, which probably meant, "I have no idea. Those readings make no sense!"
"That's a pencil sharpener," said Doof.
"Grrr," said Perry, which probably meant, "How does that information help us at this convention?"
"Guys," said Rick, "Quit quoting lines from the original shjow!"
"Why don't you stop breaking the Fourth Wall?" asked Doof.
Rick virtually facepalmed.
"CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESE!" shouted Eggy, having finished devouring the shredded remains of the cheese wheel. He was now easily ten feet tall, about as big as Punk-Fake-Mayor-Guy's monster.
"Hold it, Eggy!" shouted Doofenshmirtz as he and Perry assumed their battle positions.
"Who dares disturb me?" shouted Eggy in his creepily deep voice. Then he noticed them. "You again? IO thought I creamed you guys back at the cheese factory! Whatever, I'll just as easily pwn you again!"
His fist flew at Perry, but Perry just jumped onto in and began knawing it with his beak. Doof leaped into the air with his Kung-Fu skills and kicked Eggy right in the eye!
"Ouch!" shouted Doof. "I'm stuck!" Indeed, his foot was stuck knee-deep in the hole that Eggy calls an eye.
Suddenly, Eggy forgot about Perry and began screaming, "Agh! My eye!" Eggy clawed at his eye until he managed to grab Doofenshmirtz and yanked him out. He threw Doof onto the ground, and did the same with Perry.
"You may have won this time, Doof 'N' Puss," he said in his deep voice, "But soon I'll be invincible, and there's nothing you can do to stop me!"
Eggy punched a huge gaping hole into a nearby jailhouse and pulled out a huge chunk of cheese, tossing it into his mouth.
"Hey, that was my last meal!" shouted Punk-Fake-Mayor-Guy.
"Farewell, Doof 'N' Puss," said Eggy, and opened a pair of huge purple wings, flying off into the sky.
"Darn it!" cursed Doofenshmirtz.
Back at headquarters, Doof 'N' Puss sat around the breakfast table, eating lunch. Did I mention it was dinnertime?
"Reports of a huge, evil, flying eggplant have been reported through out the Tri-State Area," said the ews reporter guy from Doof's TV. "Who will save us from this monster?"
Doofenshmirtz turned off the TV. "What are we going to do?" he wondered.
Suddenly, Rick extended his computer screen thingy over to them. "Guys, I think I may have some information that could be of assistance."
"Grrrrr," said Perry, which probably meant, "Well, what is it? Spit it out already!"
"When Doof's leg got stuck in Eggy's eye," continued Rick, "It seemed to drop everything and focus just on him. If one of you can just get into its eye for long enough for the other to destroy it, we could be free of this eggplant for good."
"What is with everything and eyes being their weakness?" asked Doof.
"Grrrrr," said Perry, which probably meant, "And why does cheese make it more powerful? What's up with that!"
Eggy floated over to the cheese factory where he and Doof 'N' Puss had first fought. This place still had the most cheese in the entire Tri-State Area, and he was determined to eat it all.
Eggy used his now clawed hands to poke eight fingerholed into the rooftop, then pulled with all his might. He easily lifted the roof off the building and threw it to the side. He was about to fly down and grab all the cheese, when he noticed two figures standing on the tallest cheese mountain.
"Eat platypus, eggplant monster!" shouted Doofenshmirtz and threw Perry the Platypus right into Eggy's eye!
Almost immediately, horrible, insufferable pain coursed through Eggy's body, sednding him toppling to the ground.
"Agh!" he shouted. "my eye!" He tried to grab the platypus, but it only crawled farther into his eye, making him writhe in pain. Soon, Eggy's vision was starting to go purple…
"I think you can come out now, Perry the Platypus," said Doofenshmirtz, looking at the smashed aggplantshell that lay before him. As soon as Perry had entered its eye, its wings had failed it and it fell to the ground, smashing like a pumpkin on Halloween, splattering Doof's karate robes with eggplant juice.
"You know, normally this wouldn't be allowed on a kids' show, but seeing as it's an eggplant I guess it doesn't really count…," he said.
Suddenly, Perry crawled out of the eggplant's eye, covered in eggplant rinds. "Grrrrrr," he said, which probably meant, "Never. Again."