Hello ladies and gentlemen! It's me Chaos with a sort of late of update. I'm sorry that I didn't get to working on this sooner, but some things came up over the last few days. So, it's time for the fourth chapter of Link's misadventures in wind waker. I hope you enjoy this! J
Link's misadventures in wind waker: The wind temple
Link and the king of red lions were on the dock of windfall island, staring out into the ocean.
"Link, tell me why we're watching the ocean again" The king of red lions said to the unofficial hero
"Chaos didn't have any other ideas for the starting of this chapter and the ocean does look beautiful" Link said
"You are so out of character, Link. I don't think this is normal"
"This is a wind waker parody, king of red lions. It's okay to make characters out of character in a parody"
"Is it really? I don't think it is"
"Do you know what a parody is? It's a humorous story that makes fun of the game or whatever it is there writing a parody for. Making characters out of character just makes it funnier"
"Doesn't that mean that Chaos doesn't like wind waker?"
"No, she likes it. She just always wanted to write something for wind waker"
The king of red lions only stared at him.
"Aren't we supposed to be going somewhere?" The king of red lions
"Like where? Is it another dungeon? I don't like dungeons" Link said
"Link, suck it up," The king of red lions said, "We need to get into the wind temple and bring the master sword to it's former glory. That is the only way to save the princess"
"Come on, king of red lions. Can't we take a break? I had to do the earth temple last time. Do you know what happened in there?"
"Actually, no. Chaos hasn't done anything on the earth temple"
"Yet?"
"No, she hasn't mentioned anything about doing a chapter on that, and probably doesn't plan on telling us either"
"Well, whatever. Won't we need the iron boots and power bracelets?"
"Link, we already got those a long time ago"
"How? I don't remember getting them at all"
"Link, this a parody of wind waker. It's not supposed to make sense"
"Well than. Where do we go now?"
"To Gale island, in the northern great sea"
"Alright. Let's go get this over with"
(fifteen minutes later, at Gale island)
"So, we're here. What do we do now?" Link asked
"Link, how can you not see what you're supposed to do here?" The king of red lions
"I'm sort of portrayed as an idiot in this parody, can you really blame me for that?"
"You're not portrayed as an idiot, Link. You're more of a smart-ass kid"
"Dude, you just swore!"
"Chaos had no way of saying that without swearing"
"That's harsh! Now, tell me what to do"
The king of red lions sighed.
"Go pick up that rock, while wearing the iron boots" He said
"Cool, thanks" Link said
The king of red lions watched as Link went to pick up the rock.
"Link, I said wear the iron boots!" He screamed at him
All of a sudden, Link went flying past him screaming. The king of red lions stared at him, clearly not amused.
"I'm good" Link said, running past him
"Never mind. Chaos actually might be portraying him as an idiot" He said
(In the inside of Gale island)
Link looked around.
"King of red lions, this place looks empty. Are you sure this is the right location?" He asked his partner
"Yes, Gale island is the location of the wind temple. You just need to meet up with the deceased sage's sprit and learn the song that opens the entrance to the temple"
"Well, that doesn't sound easy at all. Do you know how hard that's going to be?"
Link turned to look at the pedestal with the song on it and screamed at the sight of a spirit standing in front of it.
"Hello, hero" The spirit said
"Hello," Link said, "Never mind ,he wasn't that hard to find"
"Link, you scream like a little girl" The king of red lions said
"Dude, why did you say that? We almost went two chapters without making that joke!"
"He is correct, hero. You do scream like a little girl" The spirit said
"Just shut up, dude. Anyway, you are?" Link asked him
"My name is Fado. I am the currently deceased sage of wind"
"Oh, are you going to teach me this song to reach the entrance to the temple?"
"Yes, but you must find someone with the same instrument as me and I guarantee that this will be a challenge indeed"
"It's Makar, isn't it?"
"What? How in heck did you know that?"
"He's literally the only other person with a violin in this game. It's pretty obvious"
"Well, I will teach you the song of winds, or whatever it's called, when you return here with Makar"
"Aren't you supposed to teach me the song first?"
"Yes, but I don't feel like it now"
"Well than"
(5 and half seconds later, at forest haven)
"Weren't we here last chapter?" Link asked
"Yes, but we need to find Makar and drag him to Gale island with us" The king of red lions said
"Chaos isn't going in chronological order, isn't she?"
"No, she probably wouldn't update as often if she did it that way"
"So, is Makar inside the island?"
"No, he's in the waterfall this time. Can't you hear his music from here?"
"No, because I'm here talking to you"
"That's rude, Link"
"Whatever"
(Inside the water fall, three minutes later)
Link sighed as he rung out his out his hat and put it back on again. He approached the small korok.
"Oh, hello hero! Didn't we just see each other last chapter?" He asked him
"Yes, we just went over this outside. Listen, I need you to come with me" Link said
"And where will we be going?"
"To Gale island"
"Oh, I get it. You need to bring me to Gale island so that you can learn the wind god's aria and access the wind temple to power up the master sword to it's former glory"
"How the heck did you know that?"
"I peaked in the strategy guide before this chapter. I was originally going to hide on top of the great Deku tree to confuse you, but he ordered me to follow the strategy guide and go inside this waterfall"
"Well than, are you coming or not?"
"I'll meet you outside"
The korok suddenly vanished into thin air. Link looked around in panic before shrugging and making his way outside. He approached the boat to see Makar sitting on the king of red lion's head.
"I'm not going to bother to figure out how you just did that" Link said
"It's a secret to everyone" The king of red lions and Makar said
Link only sighed and played the ballad of gales. He looked around in panic when nothing happened.
"Why didn't that work?" He asked his two partners
"Oh, you cannot use the ballad of gales when I'm with you" Makar answered
"So, I have to sail to Gale island?"
"Yes, Link. You have to sail to Gale island" The king of red lions
"Oh, shitake mushrooms!"
(about twenty minutes later, at Gale island)
Link carried Maker into Gale island, an annoyed look on his face.
"Hello, hero. I see you have returned here with the one you call Makar" Fado said
"Yes, I have. Now teach us the wind god's aria already!" Link snapped at him
"You appear to be very annoyed, hero. Has something bothered you?"
"It took me almost twenty minutes to sail here. I wasn't allowed to use the ballad of gales with Makar on the ship. And now that you mention it, it bothers me how you keep referring to me as hero"
"Excuse me, hero. That is just how I talk. If it bothers you, than I will leave and let you learn the song yourself"
"I don't think that's what he meant" Makar said
"No, that's exactly what I meant" Link said
"Fine, hero. Than I will leave. Good luck, learning that song without me!"
The spirit faded away. Makar only stared at Link.
"Link, how on earth are we going to learn the wind god's aria now?" He asked him
"I don't know, but it was sure fun annoying the sage though" Link responded
"That is the meanest thing I have heard you say, Link. No wonder you're the unofficial hero"
"Hey, I'm a hero. Just not a very good one!"
"Hey, I don't mean to interrupt your great conversation, but don't you have a song to learn?" The king of red lions asked them
"Yes, but now we have no way of learning it" Makar said
The king of red lions gave an annoyed sigh.
"Look at the rock behind you" He said
The pair turned and looked at the rock.
"Oh, the song is on the rock. How did we miss that?" Link asked
"Maybe we were so distracted that we didn't notice it" Makar suggested
"Oh, well. We have a song to learn"
(After learning the song, they entered the wind temple)
"Link, welcome to the wind temple" Makar said
"Hey, that was my line!" The king of red lions said
"Deal with it. So, Link what do you think?"
"It looks like the forbidden woods, only underground and not on an island next to another island" Link said
"Well, you'll notice that this is not the same, but quite similar. Anyway, do you care to get started?"
"Whatever gets this done fastest"
(Somewhere in another area of the temple)
"Link, do you see any way up?' Makar asked
"No, but I have a feeling that we need the main item of this temple" Link said
"What makes you think that?"
"This happens in every game in legend of Zelda. Are you some kind of idiot?"
"No, I am certainly not! Now, I am going to go plant some seeds in those small spots of land over there"
"Is that exactly safe?"
Makar was already planting the last of his seeds before Link could finish his sentence.
"Makar, this seems like a really bad idea. And how on earth do does trees grow so fast?" Link asked
"I don't know the answer to that. The great deku tree says that it's a secret to everybody, but him" Makar explained
"I am not surprised about that answer"
The tree sprouted next to him. The pair remained silent for several minutes.
"See, nothing happened" Makar said
"Thank goodness, because I thought a floor or wall master was going to come and take you for no reason at all"
All of a sudden, a circle of floor (or wall) masters appeared around Makar.
"Hello, little plant guy" They all said
"Who the heck are you people?" Makar asked him
"We are the floor (or wall) masters. We have come to kidnap you for no reason in particular"
"Do I get a say in this?"
"No, I'm afraid not"
One of the wall (or floor) masters grabbed the korok and disappeared into thin air. The others did as well. Link, who was very mad, stood there in silence.
"I cannot believe I just said that!" He screamed
He sighed and angrily began kicking the wall.
(In the room with the fan on the bottom)
"I cannot believe I jinxed it!," Link whined, "Now I have to go find him"
"Stop whining, Link. He isn't that hard to find" The king of red lions said
Link sighed and took the deku leaf out from his pocket. He jumped and let the fan take him to one of the platforms on the other side of the room.
"This is going to take forever to find him" Link said, landing on the platform
He climbed up onto a piece of land and sighed, looking around.
"Now how can I find him?" Link wondered
Link thought about for a second, and then grinned.
"I have the perfect idea!," Link said, "Marco!"
"Link, that'll never work," The king of red lions said, "That is too stupid to work"
"Polo!" Makar said
Link grinned.
"Oh, it didn't work? Because it looks like it did work" Link said
"Why is that whenever I question one of your ideas, it somehow works?" The king of red lions
"I don't know, but I need to locate Makar"
"Turn around, Link" Makar said
Link turned around to see that Makar was trapped in a cage like structure. He grinned and ran up to him
"I found you! How did you get in there?" Link asked
"The group of wall (or floor) masters threw me in here and then proceeded to cover the entrance with that giant rock" Makar explained
"Oh, well. I can move it. All I need to do is pick it up with the power bracelets on"
"It doesn't work like that, Link. You need someone or something about the weight of great deku tree to lift that thing"
"Can't I just wear the iron boots and lift it up"
"No, according to the strategy guide, you have to get the main item of this dungeon and equip the iron boots"
"Well, where can I get the main item of this dungeon?"
"You have to jump down when the fan stops and defeat some wizzrobes"
"Oh, that doesn't sound hard at all!"
(Later, in that same area)
Link climbed back up, beaten up and bruised, and appeared to be beyond annoyed.
"Oh my goodness, Link. What happened to you? I thought you were just going to get the main item" Makar said
"I was, but it wasn't as easy I thought it was"
"They were just wizzrobes"
"Three wizzrobes! They were all blasting me at the same time! It was beyond crazy! I think I think I almost got three game overs, but I still got the item"
"How do you plan on moving the rock?"
"Isn't it obvious? I'm going to stand here and use this hookshot to pull it off"
"Isn't that dangerous?"
"No, trust me, it's safe"
Before Makar could say another word, Link already had the iron boots on and was about to shoot the hookshot. Makar sighed and decided not to tell him what could go wrong.
"You just watch. Nothing could go wrong!" Link said
He shot the hookshot and soon noticed that the rock was about to hit him.
"Oh, crap" He said
(Bang!)
Makar walked out of the caged area and stared at the stone, that had previously crushed Link. He tried to push the rock off of him, but saw no results.
"This is going to take a while, isn't it?" Makar asked the king of red lions
"Yes, it is" He responded
(Way later, in front of the boss door)
Link and Makar stared up at the door. Makar seemed pleased that they got that far in the first place, but Link seemed really mad.
"What is wrong, Link? Is something bothering you?" He asked him
"Yes, this entire temple is! I was forced to go search for you after some floor (or wall) masters kidnapped you" Link started
"But that wasn't hard"
"Shut up. And then I was beaten up by a group of wizzrobes!"
"Three against one is a little unfair"
"Then I was crushed by a rock and left there for almost thirty minutes while you and the king of red lions struggled to remove it"
"Well, In our defense, I'm pretty small and the king of red lions has no arms"
"And worse of all, the mini boss drove me crazy"
"What was so bad about them? It was only two darknuts"
"They were ganging up on me! One of them kept telling me that green is a gay color! The other one kept throwing his sword at me. He almost hit me seven times"
"Yeah, but the boss can't be as bad, can't it?"
"I don't think so, but it's about time to find out!"
(In the boss chamber)
Link and Makar just stared in shock at the boss as it flew around them.
"This boss is crazy" Link said
"It can't be the craziest thing you've ever seen" Makar said
"Actually, it is. This is a wind temple and the boss is a worm thing that hides in sand! I don't get how this related to anything in the dungeon!"
"Well, of least it makes up for that. It has good attacks that are somewhat hard to dodge and no obvious weak point at all"
"That's true, but I prefer bosses with easily dodge able attacks and obviously located weak points. Why do you think all the eye ball bosses are easy? There weak point is literally the eye!"
The worm dug back into the sand, appearing in front of the pair.
"Hello, hero of winds. My name is Molgera, the boss of this temple. I am here to make sure that you don't power the master sword and defeat my master, Ganondorf" The boss said
"Don't you mean Ganondork or even Ganondouche?" Link asked
"No, his name is Ganondorf. My master does not deserve to be called those things. He is the best person I know"
"He does act like a douche" Makar added
Everything went silent. The boss appeared to be very annoyed at the pair.
"Did we anger you?" Link asked
"Are you some kind of idiot? Of course you angered me!"
"Well, if you're mad enough to eat one of us. I think you should eat Makar first"
"What? Why did you have to volunteer me? I don't want to get eaten!" Makar screamed
"I'm the hero of winds! I need to stay alive and defeat Ganondork!"
"Link," Molgera interrupted, "I would rather eat you"
"What? Why me?" Link screamed
"I'm a carnivore, not a plant eater!"
"What's a carnivore?"
"A meat eating organism" Makar answered
"Oh, thank you. Please don't eat me, Mr. Boss. I have a life to live!" Link begged
"Hero of winds, you appear to act like a baby. Perhaps eating you would be pointless, because you have no chance of defeating Ganondorf'"Well, that was a little bit unnecessary. By the way, does your weak point happen to be your tongue? It looks kind of suspicious"
"Yes, but you have no chance of defeating me!"
"What would happen if I pulled out your tongue with my hookshot?"
"I would explode and open up the power that your master sword needs"
Everything got silent.
"You are aware that you just told Link how to defeat you, right?" Makar asked the boss
"I did? Dang it!" Molgera said
"You're an idiot"
"Shut up, Plant"
Link, all of a sudden, shot the hookshot at his tongue and pulled it out. The boss exploded, draining all the sand in the room. A light appeared in the room. Link pulled out the master sword and placed it into the light.
"Link, play the wind god's aria and power the master sword!" Makar said
"Yeah, about that. I forgot the entire song already" Link said
"Didn't we use it throughout the temple?"
"Yes, but my memory sucks"
"Well, than. You're lucky I have the strategy guide on me"
"Sweet!"
(Later, outside of Gale island)
Link walked out of the island to see the king of red lions talking to the fish that marks islands down on his maps.
"So, you've been traveling around with him through various dungeons for a while now, correct?" The fish asked the boat
"Yes and, I've got to say, it sucks" The king of red lions says
"It sounds like it sucks. I mean, you're alone here until Link is done in the dungeon and when he comes back, it's just annoying"
"I know right?"
Link approached them and stared at the pair.
"Oh, hello Link," The fish said, "How much of the sea chart do you have filled out?"
"I literally only have six islands marked" Link answered
"Why is that, my friend?"
"I don't want to waste ten rupees on all purpose bait and I don't have the patience to go and mark down every island I encounter"
"Wouldn't that make you cheap and lazy?"
"Yes, it would, but I don't care. I'm saving my rupees for something important and I still have yet to find out where Aryll is"
"Link, the pirates have her" The king of red lions said
"Well, if grandma finds out about that, I'll be in a lot of trouble. She would never approve of Aryll being raised by pirates"
"Well, someone has to watch her and you're on an adventure to rescue princess Zelda"
The pair looked to see if the fish was still there. They weren't surprised to see that he left.
"So, what were you and that fish talking about when I was gone?" Link asked him
"Oh, he asked how the adventure was going" The king of red lions
"Were you telling him about all those moments where I did something stupid?"
"Yes, is that bad?"
"Yes, very bad"
The hero glared at his partner.
"Oh, Link. Bomb incoming" The king of red lions said
"I don't trust a word you say anymore," Link said looking up, noticing a bomb coming his way, "Oh, crap!"
Game over!
Well, that's it for this chapter. I decided not to count how many times the fourth wall gets broken anymore, because it seems like a break it a lot and I don't feel like counting that anymore. Anyway, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed this! Review if you did and feel free to inform me of anything I could improve on. Constructive criticism is welcome, but bad reviews aren't appreciated by me. And by bad reviews, I mean reviews that say "This story sucks" or etc.
Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this! See ya! J