200 days.
Doctors say Niou is depressed and Marui disagrees. Being depressed is not part of treatment and it's not from the cancer. Depression comes from dying. It comes on slowly as life walks you by because you're tethered down and cannot escape or catch up to life no matter how badly you want to.
Niou sits on a bench with Marui under a willow tree. Niou kisses Marui. Their kiss tastes like bubble gum and cigarettes. Marui's lips are warm but hesitant and his hands won't touch him.
"Why are you doing this?" Marui asks.
"I'm a head-case."
"Stop joking."
"My jokes never bothered you—"
"It's bothers me now because I love you and you're dying and it hurts."
Niou wants to tell Marui that it's okay, that everyone dies, but it's going to hurt even if you know that because it always hurts.
He can't finds the words with Marui's lips on his.