"Say everything you've always wanted, be not afraid of who you really are. 'Cuz in the end we have each other and that's at least one thing worth living for. And I would give the world to you." 'This is a New Year', Ian Axel

Sharon couldn't help but enjoy the quiet as she sat in the waiting room early Friday morning. Between the pale yellow walls and serene landscape paintings, it was hard not to feel like you were in someone's warm, inviting living room. The brunette had been seeing her psychologist, Dr. Debra Mitchell, for almost 14 years. On a friend's recommendation, she began counseling soon after her divorce. Initially, both she and the girls had seen the doctor, all attempting to recover from the emotional effects of John's issues. Eventually the girls hadn't felt it was necessary to continue, and the older woman began her once every other month check-ins. While she didn't feel they were always essential, it was good to have an unbiased sounding board when problem spots arose. Hearing the office door open, Sharon looked up at the rather unassuming gray-haired woman. At only five feet, the brunette could imagine that many underestimated the doctor. But what she lacked in size, she made up for in blunt honesty. And that was something the Captain found oddly refreshing, since most people were far too afraid of the Ice Queen of FID to actually call her out on her bullshit. Debra, however, did not tolerate excuses or false rationalizations. And considering Sharon had called on Monday, scheduling an additional appointment outside of their usual schedule, she could only imagine what the doctor would have to say about her most recent developments.

"Hey Sharon, good to see you. I'm ready when you are," smiled Debra, motioning for the brunette to follow her back into the office.

Once they were both seated, Sharon opting for her usual spot on the couch, the doctor jumped right in.

"So what brings you in? You can imagine my surprise when you called to ask for an appointment this week, instead of waiting until our usual time."

"Well…some things have come up and I didn't really know who else to talk to," sighed the brunette, suddenly embarrassed. Although, when she thought about it, there was really nothing to be that uncomfortable about. Ever since last Saturday's beach trip, she and Brenda had spent quite a bit of time together. Well, as much time as two head of division LAPD officers could. Sharon hadn't felt this excited about a relationship in over a decade, and that was scaring the shit out of her.

"Sharon, we've known each other for a long time. I think we're past the point that I have to pull information out of you. What's going on?"

"I've started seeing someone," Sharon muttered, without taking a breath. That wasn't nearly as difficult to say out loud as she thought it would be.

"Oh, really? And his name?"

"Oh, well…that funny…well, you see...her name is Brenda." The brunette winced, looking away from the doctor. It wasn't that she was ashamed exactly, after all, she was 58 years old and very capable of making her own choices about whom she dated. The words just sounded so odd, seeing someone, after all this time.

The doctor took a moment to study the brunette in front of her, who had just confessed to a new relationship with a woman. Debra had known the Captain for a long time, long enough to know that she didn't just jump into things without thoughtfully considering how they would affect her long-term. It was surprising that after so many years of very casually dating (bordering on simple one night stands, but the good doctor was never one to judge another woman's choices), Sharon was admitting to actually seeing someone on a regular basis. Therapists weren't really supposed to have favorites, but the doctor had always admired the brunette for her quiet strength, even in the face of great despair. Knowing Sharon was rather shy, especially about her personal life, she decided to approach this subject gently, not wanting to push the brunette too hard.

"So, Brenda you said? Where did you two meet?"

"That's a good question. We've known each other for almost 4 years…" Sharon continued, giving the doctor the broad strokes of their combative relationship over the past few years. As she recounted their tumultuous interactions, the brunette couldn't help but laugh at how far they'd come since that night at St. Catherine's Medical Center.

"Forgive me, this might seem like a rather unnecessary question, but did you two ever really hate each other? Or was the fighting merely to cover up some attraction?"

"Hmm, I can't speak for her, but I've entertained the idea that maybe I felt something, even during that first investigation."

"Was that realization a surprise for you?"

"Yes, well maybe, I don't know. I don't think I've ever had feelings for another woman, not like this. And even if I had, my parents would have never allowed one of their children to be anything less than a perfect Catholic." Sharon laughed darkly at the thought of bringing home Brenda to meet the family. While her father had died years before, the brunette's mother was still a large part of her life. Throughout her childhood, her hovering parents had dictated almost every aspect of her existence, from what she wore to whom she was friends with. As a result, Sharon had struggled with social issues throughout her teen and college years, never feeling like she fit in with those around her, always afraid she would say the wrong thing. Painfully quiet and shy, the Captain had loosened up only after joining the police force, finally feeling like she belonged. Then John had come along, and his bigger then life personality gave her a fresh wave of self-confidence…well, until it all went to hell. And now, she had Brenda. That completely adorable, often amusing, clumsy, gorgeous blonde who made Sharon feel like she was the only woman in the room. Even though it had only been less than a week of dating (officially), the brunette felt like this could be something more than an infatuation. She was still deep in thought when she heard the doctor speaking.

"Sharon?"

"Huh? Oh, sorry, I must have spaced. Could you repeat that?"Sharon blushed slightly before looking over at the other woman.

"Why don't you tell me what you were just thinking about?"

"Well, I was just thinking that this is the first time I've felt something in a long time. And it scares me…but it's also kind of thrilling. I thought I had missed my opportunity to find anyone. Then Brenda came along and I forgot how nice it was to have another person worry about me, to ask about my day. It's nice. I just hope I don't fuck it up per usual," clipped the brunette, sarcastically.

"Why would you fuck it up?" Obviously nothing was getting by Debra today, she knew Sharon better than most. Sarcasm was one of her favorite ways to speak the truth without actually admitting that was how she really felt.

"I haven't tried being in any sort of relationship in a long time. I enjoy being by myself. I can do whatever I want, when I want, and I don't have to worry about how it makes anyone else feel. And Brenda, well, we're very similar in many ways. We both want things done our way and we don't take no for an answer. It's just hard to imagine this working long-term if neither of us are willing to give an inch."

"Sharon, do you want my two cents?" The brunette responded with a nod, quite interested in her doctor's analysis.

"You've been alone for some time now. And as you said, you've enjoyed it. Maybe you've stayed alone because of John and all that happened? Maybe you've never found the right person? Who knows? What I do know is that I've seen you for over a decade and I haven't seen you smile this much since the girls were living at home. Instead of analyzing everything, why don't you just let go, see what happens? It might not work out and that could be painful. But you have the girls, I'm always here to listen, and I have no doubt you could get through it. Unless you give this chance, no matter who it's with, you'll never know what could have been with Brenda. And I know you're not the kind of woman who wants to look back and wonder."

"It's funny you say that, 'stop analyzing things and just see what happens.' Brenda tells me that all the time"

"Well, it sounds like she might just be a perfect catch. Anyone who forces you out of your head is okay in my book," laughed the doctor.

"I think Brenda forces the truth out of just about everyone she meets," deadpanned the brunette.

"It probably helps that she was trained by, who did you say, the CIA right? She really sounds great, Sharon, I hope things work out for you two. Have you told her how you feel about all these changes in your relationship after the weeks of back and forth?" Debra was still a little unsure of exactly what the problem was, the Captain seemed happy and all signed pointed to this Brenda being a great match. There must be something she was missing.

"I don't know what I feel exactly. We're taking things slow, and I just don't know how much I should tell her, just yet. That's really why I made this appointment…"

An hour later, Sharon was dashing into LAPD headquarters. Against her better judgment, she pushed the button for Major Crimes, hoping to catch the blonde before this afternoon. There were a few things the older woman had realized during her session, and the two needed to talk. Brenda had been called in early that morning (2am to be exact, if her text to the brunette was any indication) and the Captain also wanted to make sure she hadn't killed anyone yet. She knew the Chief wasn't a morning person, especially since she'd probably gotten home only an hour before the call. The two had shared a lovely evening, complete with Chinese take out and some less than innocent petting on the couch. Even though they had drunkenly slept together, the brunette wanted to take things slow and develop a relationship outside the bedroom. As much as she'd wanted to ask the blonde to spend the night, Brenda had agreed it was for the best that she went home a little after midnight. The elevator rang, signaling her arrival, and Sharon headed for the murder room. After surveying the empty area, she noticed the blonde's light was on in her office. Knocking lightly, she slowly opened the door, careful to not disturb the Chief too much.

"Hey, you," smiled the blonde, looking up from the papers in front of her, black rimmed glasses still perched on her nose.

"How's the case going?" Sharon settled into one of the chairs across from the Chief, throwing her things to rest on the other.

"Well, at first it was lookin' like I would be here forever. But I got the wife singin' like a canary as soon I mentioned her pool boy lover had ratted her out. Nothin' like killin' your husband to run off with the hired help. Only in LA, I guess."

"Hmm, I'm pretty sure that happens everywhere honey," intoned the older woman.

"I guess. How was your morning? How did the doctors go?" As soon as the words came out, the blonde almost regretted asking. Sharon had said she had a doctor's appointment, although she hadn't really specified what kind. Maybe she didn't want to talk about it.

"Actually, that's kind of why I came up here. What does the rest of your day look like?" Sharon could see the confusion on Brenda's face. Apparently that wasn't the response she was expecting

"I should be done all this terrible, annoyin' paperwork in an hour or two. If it wasn't the mornin', I would drink a huge glass of Merlot after. Then I was gonna head home, actually get some sleep since I didn't get much last night," smirked the younger woman.

"Well as long as nothing major pops up, would you be interested in lunch before you went home for the afternoon? I'll even take the hour, my treat."

"I'm always interested in lunch when it involves you, Captain," Brenda husked.

"Call me when you finish up." Sharon got up, grabbed for her things, and headed to the door.

"Wait, one second," Brenda rounded the corner, glancing over to make sure the blinds were closed, and grazed her lips against the other woman's. Hopefully the brunette wouldn't be too upset, considering the last time they had kissed at work didn't end so well. Sharon softly moaned at the contact, she obviously wasn't that upset. The blonde pulled away, smiling, before planting a last kiss on those lovely lips.

"You didn't think you were actually gettin' outta here without sayin' goodbye?"

"How silly of me. Goodbye, Brenda Leigh. Call me when you're done," flirted the brunette, before clipping out the door.

Brenda called around 1pm; her paperwork had taken longer than expected. The two agreed to meet at Sharon's car, and soon they were headed away from headquarters, up the 101, toward Canoga Park. Pulling into a pharmacy parking lot, the blonde couldn't help but let out a sigh. Sharon had brought almost 30 minutes outside LA to pick up a prescription? All she wanted to do was go home and go to bed.

"We're here," chirped the Captain, unbuckling her seatbelt and exiting the car.

"Uh, what's here?" The younger woman was more than a little irritated by this pointless field trip. Not to mention, completely exhausted.

"It's a surprise, just come on," smirked the brunette, extending her hand and lacing their fingers together. Brenda really brought out her tender side, she hadn't held hands this much since she was in her 20s.

Entering the pharmacy, Brenda was hit with a wave of familiar smells. Was that ice cream?

"I used to bring the girls here when they were younger," Sharon confessed, before guiding the younger woman to the counter and plopping down on one of the stools.

The blonde followed suit, but couldn't focus. There were too many amazing smells wafting through the air. Not to mention, everything on the menu in front of her was in fact, ice cream.

"I thought we were goin' to lunch?"

"Well, I figured after today, we could just skip the meal and head straight for desert." Sharon smiled, than lightly placed her hand on the younger woman's thigh.

The blonde took the opportunity to steal a quick peck before looking back down at her menu. Sharon really thought of everything, this was one of the sweetest gestures anyone had done for her in a long time. The server arrived a few minutes later, although Brenda had been too busy stealing heated glances to actually decide what she wanted.

"What can I get you ladies?"

"We'll have 1 banana split and 1 ice cream soda," Sharon coolly responded.

Brenda normally hated someone else ordering for her, it made her feel like a child, incapable of making her own decisions. However when it came to the brunette, she couldn't help but feel like Sharon just wanted to make her happy. And after all, she had been to this incredible place more than once. Obviously she knew what ice cream options were best.

Soon their ice cream concoctions arrived, Brenda opting to start with the soda while the brunette worked on the banana split. The younger woman couldn't hide the moan of pleasure at her first bite, eye's fluttering as the sugary taste overtook her senses.

"Oh my gosh Shar, this is amazin'. Is this glass dipped in chocolate?"

"It is, then they top it with more chocolate sauce. I figured that might be something you'd enjoy," laughed the brunette. Brenda looked so adorable, wide smile across her face.

After a few bites of their initial choices (well, Brenda basically finished the float but there was a sizable amount left of the banana split), the two women swapped and settled in.

"So, you never told me how your doctor's appointment went? You said somethin' about wantin' to talk to me about it?" For the last few hours, Brenda had been nervously awaiting whatever the older woman had to say. Honestly, she had worked herself up with all the possibilities. The last time anyone had sat her down to have a conversation involving a doctor's visit, it ended with her Daddy having cancer. He had eventually beat it, but not before completely turning her off to the idea of medical community in general. The Chief wouldn't be able to handle anymore bad news when it came to doctor's, especially coming from the beautiful woman beside her.

"It wasn't a doctor exactly. Well, she has a PhD, so I guess she's a doctor. Anyway, I went to my therapist this morning," confessed the brunette, hoping Brenda wouldn't judge her or see her as weak.

"Therapist?"The blonde sucked in a deep breath, she had never warmed to the idea of shrinks. Too many questions.

"I started seeing Dr. Mitchell after my divorce, with the girls. Once they got older and didn't want to go anymore, I continued. It's nice to see her every once in a while and get an unbiased opinion of things going on in my life. And, well, we started talking about you…"

"Me?" Hopefully good things, the blonde thought.

"Yes Brenda Leigh, is that so hard to believe? Anyway, she helped me realize a few things," offered the older woman.

"Like?" If Sharon didn't spit it out soon, the Chief was going to burst from anticipation.

"Like, I'm really happy. I realize it's only been a week, well almost three, counting all our earlier encounters, but it's been nice. You took a huge risk, letting me know how you felt and I'm really glad that you did. So maybe it's time I do the same. I do care about you and I was thinking maybe we could try…"

"Are you askin' me to be your girlfriend?" blurted out the blonde, mouth hanging open in shock. This conversation had taken a swift right turn from where Brenda thought they were headed and she couldn't be happier. It had only been a few weeks, well one week since Sharon actually decided to give them a chance, but the blonde had already entertained the idea of asking to become official. Not exactly in the advertising their relationship way, just simply to make a commitment to each other.

"Oh my God, are we 15? No, I just wanted you to know that I want to try this, you and me, exclusively. If that's what you want too."

"Shar, of course that's what I want," cried the blonde, practically falling off her stool, crashing their lips together for a kiss.

"Hey, let's finish our ice cream before it melts. We have plenty of time for that later tonight. That is, if you want to come over?" Sharon raised an eyebrow, smirking suggestively at the younger woman.

"I want to, but it might be kinda late. I still need to get some sleepin' in before I'll be able to come over." Brenda yawned, she was exhausted, even after the excitement of ice cream and their official relationship.

"Maybe you could spend the night," whispered the brunette, before planting a chocolatey kiss on her (now) girlfriend.

A/N: Sorry it's been a bit, I got distracted by a few exciting one-shots I wanted to create. But I'm back (and it's on…yeah, I'm talking to you, you know who you are). Thanks for all the love and feedback thus far, any thoughts are encouraged and appreciated! xoxo