Hank hurried and was only gone for two hours. He jumped out of the car and couldn't wait to get back to his brother. He kissed Emily and ran to Evan's room. But his brother wasn't there. He went back to his girlfriend. "Is he in the restroom?"
"No, he's gone." She pressed two tears out of her eyes. And he now saw that her shirt was ruined and her face was slightly bruised.
"What happened?"
"He left his room and walked to the door. I tried to stop him, but he just hit me twice and went off. I don't know where he went."
"His car is outside. And I don't believe he would ever hit anyone, not even with all the bad feelings he seems to have for you, maybe he was delirious or so."
"He called someone to pick him up, I think it was Eddie that came and got him. I'm sorry, it was some kind of shock to be attacked by him. He was so drunken."
"Okay, Emily. Please drive home, I go and try to find my brother. I'm really sorry for what he did to you and he will have to explain it to me and to apologize to you. I would be thankful, if you didn't go to the police. He needs help and I get him that. Just give him a chance to make up for it."
"I'll think about it. Call me, when you have your crazy brother somewhere where he can't hurt innocent people. Not the best way to keep a woman by your side, living with a psychopath." Emily turned around and left.
Hank wanted to say something, but didn't take the time. He somehow felt that Evan had been right about that woman right from the start. Yes, she was of course angry for what Evan had done to her, but she was just cold those last minutes. I can't believe he ran away and that he would be able to hit her. That's so not him, but drinking isn't him either. Fuck! He ran both hands through his hair.
The first thing he tried was calling his brother on his cell. But the ringing came from the room that his brother had left in a hurry. He went back there, but didn't find the phone. And all of Evan's clothes were still in the wardrobe and the picture of Evan and him with the bike was torn, lying in many small pieces on the floor. Evan loved this picture and protected it all those years, he wouldn't destroy it. Never.
"Where are you little brother?" He sat down on the bed and tried to think. His next move was to try and call his father, but he didn't answer the phone. "Hope you're okay, Evan, wherever you are" said to the room.
The doctor felt desperation growing in him. But he knew he couldn't let himself go there. It wouldn't do any good. He called his brothers phone again and looked for it, following the crazy melody. He found it under the bed. Not like it had fallen there, more like someone had put it carefully on the top of the diaries. Evan! I'm sure he wanted me to look into those books. Oh man, you're so much smarter than you ever get credit for.
He grabbed one of the books and saw that it was the current one. He opened it, but had his eyes closed. A cold hand had a grip on his heart and squeezed it. What if I read it and Evan didn't just run away. Maybe he left to...No! You know him, he'd never commit suicide.
He opened his eyes and started looking for the last entry, but decided to start sooner and somehow found the entry after Evan had come back from a seminar in New York a couple of months ago. That was pretty close to when he had noticed the changes in his brothers behavior.
Dunno what happened during the time in NY, don't even remember the last three days of the seminar. Good that I know all about the stuff they talked about or have some books to find out the rest. Something happened there the second evening. Just wish I could remember. Woke up naked on the floor of my room. Makes no sense to me. And I had a headache. God, this blackness in my brain kills me.´
"That was probably the first time he started drinking so much. I have to run a HIV test on him. If he found himself naked, who says he didn't have sex with some unknown woman and without any protection?" He read the next entries and found some more alarming texts.
I feel so bad every night and it gets worse. Just don't know what's wrong with me. I feel so messed up, dizziness and sickness gets worse and I have problems to keep myself going, so that Hank doesn't need to worry. He has enough to deal with all the patients, Divya's planned time out for who knows how long and the money that I lost. No, have to keep going for him.
Sickness is horrible today. Had to throw up six times, since Hank has left. I smell alcohol in my vomit and on myself, didn't drink anything. Don't get it. Those nightmares feel so real now. Afraid to sleep at all.
hard 2 write, shaking like hell, pain all over my body, my torso feels swollen. Nightmares again, those people hurt this boy and then men come into my room and hit and kick me, think they make me drink. And some drugs, not sure, it's all a blur and after all dreams, huh? Not sure, but living is not worth anymore. Should just die, would make things easier for my big brother.
"Oh God, Evan. How could you ever think that I would be better off without you?" Hanks eyes were tearing.
Hank found out I'm drinking, can't remember to drink at all, not since the night in NY when all went black, but he's probably right. He's the smart one in our family. Wish Emily was gone or I could accept her, we're always arguing since she's here. Had blood in my vomit and in the toilet. Guess from the alcohol. Those nightmares seem more than real now. The men and this woman talk to me and kick me in my ribs, funny I even feel pain there. I want to die. Try to fight for Hank, but don't wanna live anymore. Think I know now, what the dreams about the boy are. Should read my old diaries to find out. I'm crying every moment that I spend alone. Can't stop anymore. Please just let me die, fall asleep and never wake up again.
There was nothing he could do anymore, Hank cried in pain, sorrow and fear for his brother. How could I've been so blind to not not see what has been going on with my little brother? His hands were trembling, when he opened the next and last entry of the book.
betrays him thought trip was 4 her and Hank, but wasn't. Felt mad 4 not telling, but he didn't know. Guilty now, sorry. She's with Eddie – married! Will tell Hank and told her, she laughed, thinks won't believe me, drugged me, Eddie helped, kept me down so she could reach my arm. feel bad, spinning scared sick, don't wanna die this way, help me... too much pain... no time.. sorry, love you, Hank, much
Hank had to read it several times to make sure he wasn't dreaming. His father and Emily, married? She had drugged Evan? He didn't know what to think. But then a memory came up, Emily had told him that it was Eddie that picked up Evan, but how did she know him? They had never met. The sugar, when Evan had gone to drink. It was Eddie! Everything Evan said was the truth. I'm gonna find you, kiddo. Never doubt you again.
The thing was that he didn't know how or where to start. Did Evan run away because they drugged him and he was scared? Should he call the police or not? Should he drive to Emily and talk to her? Or look for Eddie? He thought the last would be the best, because Evan had been gone when he came here, but Emily had been here, so it was a good guess that Eddie had taken his youngest son with him.
He tried to call his father again, but didn't get any answer. His father had left a short note with the hotel and the room he stayed in, when he had visited them the first day. Hank looked through all the papers that were lying everywhere over Evan's desk. It took time to go through everything and he was becoming nervous. He took a few deep breaths to calm down and started the whole search again. After two more minutes he held the note in his hands. The hotel wasn't far away.
It didn't take long for Dr. Lawson, maybe he was a bit too fast, to reach the hotel and ran into the hallway where his fathers room was supposed to be. He knocked on the door calling his fathers name, knocked again. "Evan!" Again, no response. He was somewhere between raging anger and panic. It took a lot of him to let go his first impulse to kick in the door, what he mostly likely couldn't have done anyway. He ran to the elevators, but was too impatient to wait and ran downstairs to the front desk lady. "Eddie Lawson, Room 311, is he here?"
The woman looked sceptically at the man that was out of breath. "I'm afraid I can't give you any information about our guests, Sir."
"Okay, now look at me lady, he's my father and I don't know which lie to tell you, can't think of any, so I'm gonna tell you straight" They both looked at each other, when panic finally took over and he yelled and whined in the same moment "my father, Eddie Lawson, took my brother after he drugged him and I need to find them. If anything happens to him, I'm gonna kill everyone who stood in my way." The panic settled into desperation and fear and he only whispered his next words."Sorry, I'm usually not like this. Here is my card, if you or any of your guest may need a doctor in an emergency, please let me know, but tell me about Eddie Lawson, no matter how crazy me or my story sound."
She cleared her throat, she had been close to call the security men, but stopped, when she felt the mans honesty and desperation. "Sir, I can't give you information about our guest." She saw his shoulder sag and sorrow growing in him before she began again. "But I can tell you that a young man was sitting on the chair over there with another man holding him up. Looked very pale to me. Thought he didn't feel good. I've seen the guarding man with one of the guests earlier. It didn't take too long and three men, including the two I told you about, came back."
"Thank you! Was that the young man you're talking about?" He opened his wallet and let her look at a picture of Evan.
"Yes, I had the feeling he was worse, when they left. I asked if the man was okay, but was told that he wasn't and that they would bring him to the hospital."
"Oh God! Thank you for helping me."
"Sir? I suggest you hurry to find your brother. A room on the third store is empty and cleaned soon. The guest has left 90 minutes ago."
Hank ran to his car in no time, now on his way to Emily. She'll regret she ever met me. Such a bitch! Oh Ev, you were right, I'm sorry. Please, be okay.
He called all hospitals in the Hamptons, but didn't have any hope that Evan was really there and found out soon that he was right. He drove too fast, but didn't care.