The fake Katniss and the real Katniss

Maya Normousbutt could finally get outside after having a deal with the Gorilla Man – he will leave her alone and she in return will shave off her mustache. Apparently he thought it was "long," and "manly," and "incredibly disgusting."

As if!

It was nice and fluffy and utterly adorable.

It took her some time to agree, she grew attached to her beautifully thick mustache and it made her face look more "unique", but it was a small price to pay not to die.

Maya Normousbutt as usual was on Facebook, because seriously, she just couldn't get enough of it, no matter how stupid and boring this website actually was.

She noticed that Peeta commented on Katniss Evergreen's Wall, and so she decided to check it out.

When she got to her profile though she froze in her place and read what's written there, because something just seemed awfully weird.

Katniss Evergreen profile page

Name: The one and only – Katniss!

Age: 17.

Home: District Twelve, the Seam.

Current location: Next to a picture of Peeta! *heart heart heart heart heart*

Interested in: Kissing Peeta, hugging Peeta, lusting after Peeta, snuggling against Peeta, eating with Peeta, being with Peeta, Peeta, Peeta, Peeta! *heart*

In a relationship: Married to my sweet Peeta! Am the happiest girl ALIVE! Peeta is MINE!

Yep, something was not right.

Maya then decided to read what Peeta wrote in his comment, which he posted on April 27 at 13:21PM.

'OMG, Katniss, you finally realized you LOAF ME! :D'

Katniss Evergreen immediately wrote a response.

'Oh, Peeta, I sure did. I loaf you so, so much. You're the loaf of my life!'

Peeta Mellark was very excited by that.

'*wipes tears from his eyes* I thought this day will never come!'

Katniss Evergreen wrote another quick reply.

'Are you kidding me? Peeta, I was in loaf with you since you threw me that bread so many years ago!'

Gale Hawthorne then decided to join this awfully weird conversation.

'WHAT! What the hell, Catnip? Only yesterday you told me you want the bread-boy to leave you alone!'

Katniss Evergreen, who overnight fell for Peeta, apparently wasn't that crazy about Gale.

'Yuck, Gale! I HATE YOU! Team Peeta for life! You killed my sister! I HATE YOU!'

Maya Normousbutt was completely confused. That was NOT the Katniss she stalked and adored.

Gale Hawthorne was apparently really annoyed by her comment.

'I did not kill Prim! I just helped making the bombs, I didn't send them! Why are you blaming me for that!'

Katniss Evergreen was still angry and irrational and completely un-Katniss.

'BECAUSE I HATE YOU!'

FoxFace then joined the conversation.

'Aren't you his best friend?'

Katniss Evergreen posted the next comment.

'Not after I fell for Peeta! Gale is just standing in my way!'

Peeta Mellark replied to her comment.

'That must be the happiest day of my life!'

Cato The Sexy Buffalo then joined the conversation.

'Something's not right here. When did Katniss start acting so... in love?'

Mrs. Everdeen then joined the conversation.

'I must say, I'm pleased she's finally accepting her feelings for Peeta! Shows that she actually has emotions other than anger and depression deep inside of her.'

Peeta Mellark, who was having the best day of his life, wrote the next comment.

'I wrote a song for you, Katniss! ^^'

Haymitch Abernathy wrote exactly what Maya was thinking in her mind.

'Oh, no.'

Peeta Mellark ignored him.

'"All you need is loaf… all you need is loaf… all you need is loaf! Loaf… loaf is all you need…" I wrote it just for you!'

Katniss Evergreen replied immediately.

'OMG! *dies from the awesomeness that is Peeta Mellark*'

Cato The Sexy Buffalo wasn't feeling the same way as Katniss Evergreen.

'Oh, dear God…'

Katniss Evergreen was apparently extremely excited.

'PEETA, YOU'RE THE AWESOMEST, MOST TALENTED GUY TO EVER WALK ON THIS PLANET! I LOAF YOU!'

Katniss Everdeen posted the next comment.

'WAIT A MINUTE!'

…wait, what?

Haymitch Abernathy was apparently as confused as Maya Normousbutt was.

'Is Katniss really in this conversation twice? Am I seeing double?'

'Probably,' Was Foxface's response.

Katniss Everdeen wrote the next comment.

'The one writing all those things about me loving Peeta is NOT ME!'

'I KNEW IT!' Gale Hawthorne wrote immediately.

Peeta Mellark was confused.

'*scratches head, confused* what are you talking about, Katniss loaf?'

Katniss Evergreen then wrote the next comment.

'Nothing! I'm the REAL Katniss!'

And Katniss Everdeen wrote the comment after that.

'Shut up, you… imposter!'

Haymitch Abernathy wrote the next comment.

'Yeah, that'll show her.'

Katniss Evergreen, Gale Hawthorne, Cato The Sexy Buffalo and Foxface all liked this comment.

'I'm the real Katniss!' Katniss Evergreen wrote.

'No, I'm the real Katniss!' Katniss Everdeen sent.

'Tell her, Peeta!' Katniss Everdeen and Katniss Evergreen wrote together. Not that it was possible, of course, but oh well.

Peeta Mellark replied after a few minutes of silence.

'O.O'

Gale Hawthorne sent the next comment.

'I think you just scared the hell out of him.'

'No, I know how to sort this out!' Peeta Mellark wrote, apparently finding a solution to the problem.

Katniss Everdeen wasn't impressed.

'Seriously? Her username isn't even my real name! Evergreen, really?'

Peeta Mellark replied quickly.

'Okay, "Katniss", if that's even your real name… -'

'Humph.' Katniss Everdeen sent.

Peeta Mellark continued with his comment.

'- I'll ask you a question; the one that gives me the right answer will be declared as the real Katniss.'

Katniss Everdeen, again, wasn't impressed.

'You're stupid.'

Cato The Sexy Buffalo sent the next comment.

'Way to suck up to the judge, Katniss.'

Haymitch Abernathy, Foxface and Gale Hawthorne liked this comment.

Katniss Evergreen was, apparently, extremely impressed with Peeta Mellark and his genius ideas.

'*I loaf Peeta heart heart heart*'

Peeta Mellark sent the next comment.

'*heart back to Katniss Evergreen* Okay, so the question is… What is my worst fear?'

Katniss Evergreen replied quickly.

'Your worst fear is that I'd die!'

Peeta Mellark replied shortly.

'No.'

Katniss Evergreen tried again.

'That the Capitol would rise again?'

Peeta Mellark was, again, writing a short response.

'Nope.'

Katniss Evergreen was on her third try now.

'To see me and *gag* Gale together?'

Peeta Mellark replied quickly.

'*shakes head*'

Katniss Everdeen then wrote her answer.

'To be eaten by a seventy-pound Gingerbread man.'

Peeta Mellark replied quickly.

'That is correct!'

Gale Hawthorne wrote the next comment.

'You're pathetic.'

Katniss Evergreen replied almost immediately to Gale's disrespectful comment.

'Shut it, Hawthorne! TEAM PEETA!'

Katniss Everdeen wrote the next comment.

'Ha! So now you all see who the REAL Katniss Everdeen is! Take that, Evergreen!'

Foxface posted the next comment.

'I think you should block that Evergreen girl, Peeta. So that you won't get confused.'

Peeta Mellark replied to her comment.

'Yeah, you're right.'

'Of course I'm right,' Was Foxface's reply.

Katniss Everdeen wrote the next comment.

'Told you she was an imposter! She's not nearly as good as me! Ha! Go to hell, imposter!'

And then a message appeared on Peeta's Wall.

'- Peeta Mellark Activity: Peeta Mellark has blocked Katniss Everdeen.'

Maya Normousbutt frowned at the screen. Did he get confused again?

Gale Hawthorne wrote the next comment.

'…you do realize you blocked the wrong one, right?'

Peeta Mellark replied quickly.

'Yep. I prefer this Katniss WAY better.'

Cato The Sexy Buffalo, Katniss Evergreen, Foxface and Haymitch Abernathy liked Peeta's comment.

I wrote the word 'loaf' so many times in this chapter. Seriously, now whenever I write the word love I want to write loaf instead. Peeta is a bad influence.

So, I'm going to ask you a question that really has nothing to do with this fic.

Have any of you seen the video "Harry Potter in 99 seconds" by Paint? I've seen it today for the first time, and seriously, it's one of the best things I've ever seen or heard. That guy is so talented, I'm seriously half in love with him.

Not that you care, of course. But I just had to write about it right now in my Author Note, because I just loved loved loved this video. If you haven't seen it, which I doubt, it has over 10 million views, then watch it now. It's brilliant. Even my mom loved it.

Anyways! Hope you all have a lovely day :)