A/N Hey, everyone. Sorry for the delay, however - quite unexpectedly - the real difficulties started here, at home. And it was not just a poor internet or depression - I mean the real stuff, when comparing a life to children's in Africa makes no difference. So I simply didn't have it in me to write a word, though I did want it badly, you know, just to get away from it all. Anyways, now things are getting a little better and I am ready to post the new chapter.

But before that…

BIG hugs to

Moonprincess998

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Enjoy the new chapter.

Disclaimer: Do not own SM


Chapter 6

2011-03-03

Dear diary,

It's been a year since we broke up. Long and deserted year of suffering the inner pain and acting - ok, let it be starring - in my life, instead of living it. Frankly, I think if I was actually filming this, it would have been my greatest achievement. Oscar for the best actress in a leading role goes to… Mina DeVeene!

Who am I kidding? The things are getting messier with every day.

I haven't tried to fall in love and yet I am married. Hardly can anyone - who knows the truth, that is - call it a devoted relationship full of affection or respect. Actually, it kinda feels like I am still single: doing my own things, meeting up with friends, partying and, along with all that, trying to develop mentally and physically, never seeing my husband, except for official events where even he, his majesty King Robot, has to play the role. But the truth is, he doesn't know me. On the other hand, as men are all the same, I assume I can claim I know him, along with 3,5 billion other males on this planet.

I'd be lying if I said I never think about Alan. I do. Sometimes more and sometimes less, I believe, there are even days when I forget to think about him at all, though that may turn out to be just a kind of wishful thinking. As childish as it sounds, I check out his accounts in social networks, fish for rumors about him and then behave as if I don't care. Can it get any worse? He seems to be the only one I do not understand, though being by his side constantly for almost a year.

I met him several times on some parties. And every time our paths crossed he behaved as if he doesn't know me. I know we broke up and all, but hey! Can you at least try to be polite and say "hi" for a change?! To tell the truth, the rumors are not any batter. It seems he sinks into a kind of hell ever since he dumped me, drinking, smoking and who knows what else? I know he is better than that. I know he is a good man, honest and loving, sometimes even vulnerable. But everyone tends to think otherwise.

Maybe, I've been wrong all this time?

Sometimes I wonder if Alan is just an obsession. After all, he was the first to proclaim his feelings to me, to pay attention to my emotions and dreams, desires and aspirations. He was my very first love. It is only natural that I can't forget him. He was the first who touched my heart and my soul, my body. Girls do not forget that. And the first one who made me think about my future, my own family: husband, kids and home - all the usual stuff that I had never been interested in. So you can count it as an accomplishment as well.

And I actually wholeheartedly believed he was thinking about it too. Turned out I was wrong. Well, may be not so wrong. But he chose another bride. Found out, she is actually four years older than Alan - and that makes her like eight years older than me! Oh, for Heaven's sake! It's just too much to take.

But, who cares about him. Right? I need to do something with my life. Run away. Commit a suicide… not that I can do that. And Darien would be just too happy if he got rid of me so easily. However the thought has just triggered something in my head.

Need to go see Lita.


Serena was reading Mina's diary, page after page of endless pain and loneliness well-hidden by her entourage. There were several withered spots and Serena could almost picture Mina crying when she was writing it all, perhaps the only moment when the woman could afford being weak, but still not showing even a tenth of all the emotions she was experiencing.

'Who is this Lita character anyway?'

Oh, how much Serena wished to be there for her instead of everyone else! To tell her...

"Mina, are you hungry?"

Well, not that, of course. Though...

Serena slowly looked up at the man standing by her side. Handsome brunet with sapphire eyes. Fairy-tale prince. Too good to be true.

First time Serena met the man, he appeared to be cold and distant, ideal, but emotionless, almost destroying the image of the Prince Charming. However now Serena could see soft, warm glitter in his eyes, his caring smile made her heart beat a little faster and... she felt guilty. True, in her diary Mina was constantly admitting that their relationship had been far from a real marriage, but nevertheless it seemed to be wrong - flirting with Darien, taking his hand and kissing him, not to mention sleeping by his side. The man thought he was being romantic with his wife, which she was not. Unfortunately. But they were so alike...

"Mina?"

"I... Yes, I would very much appreciate the meal," - with that her stomach absolutely agreed and expressed its desire the only way possible, making Darien chuckle while pecking the woman on the cheek.


It was one of those restaurants Serena had read about in fancy magazines while waiting for her hairdresser. Very expensive. And absolutely wonderful. She would adore this place, if it or rather its customers weren't screaming money making her extremely uncomfortable.

It was situated on the bank of a river, away from the noises of the city, but still in the very heart of it. A soothing melody was softly playing in the background, making it easy to forget it was even there. Some of the tables were surrounded by chairs, while others - by couches, and it was just a matter of taste which one to choose. With quite a few vivid details here and there, beige and white were still majoring in the somewhat oriental design, making Serena admire it all more.

Darien chose a table near a large wide window. The sun was already setting and disappearing right into the water. The color of the sky could not be expressed by the verbal means no matter how hard a person tried, so Serena snapped a photo with her new camera phone instead.

She almost understood what Mina felt like throughout her married life when the moment they sat at the table a wave of endless phone calls, e-mails and people coming to say hi covered him. She most definitely felt abandoned. And here Darien was actually being nice, while Mina made it absolutely clear that he hadn't paid attention to her. Ever.

So Serena silently was eating and admiring the breathtaking view. She figured it was useless to even try to get Darien's attention for a second.

She had sent pictures of the sunset and herself with a message to Zoi and now was patiently waiting for an answer. She had been trying to reach him, Amy or even Kun for the whole day, but with no luck, it was as if they all just disappeared. As if they didn't exist.

The fatigue was slowly taking over her, so Serena didn't catch the moment when the constant ringing of the phone stopped, and so did the sound of typing and voices around.

Darien was watching her as if seeing for the first time. He had been doing this all day, trying to avoid being caught. And, as far as he could tell, he succeeded so far.

This woman was always thinking about something and Darien was willing to sacrifice anything just to get a glimpse of her thoughts.

He intentionally had chosen this place as he knew for sure that Mina adored it. She had her favorite place, of course, in the middle of the restaurant, so that everyone could see her, watch her eat and chat, admire her beauty, maybe even envy her a little.

However this time his wife preferred being led to a secluded area near the window, where hardly anyone could see them. She was looking around as if being here for the first time, taking in all the details of the interior. Darien even caught her making sketches on a piece of paper.

"If you could have picked a name, how would you name yourself?"

"I am sorry?"

The woman was surprised to find out that Darien was no longer speaking on the phone, but rather looking at her attentively, almost as if trying to find a flaw. Serena even didn't understand the question for the first time,but then she grasped the idea. When she pronounced her own name, it felt suddenly foreign.

"Serena. Serena Serenity."

"Serena Serenity? Aren't they almost the same? And why Serenity? Is it because of me?" - his eyes lit up at the thought, his boyish smile that appeared on his face could make any heart melt in a matter of seconds.

Serena frowned and answered:

"Yeah, Serena is a modern version of the name, however it still sounds pretty plain to me compared to Serenity, so I would keep it as my middle name, to myself. I love it because of the ancient legend of the Moon goddess and a Terran man. It most definitely has nothing to do with you... Or it has?"

"Let me introduce myself properly, my fair lady, as you seem to have forgotten your husband's full name, I am Endymion Darien Shields. It had seemed weird to be called Endymion, so I prefer being called by my middle name. Though, you, goddess, can call me whatever you like."

Darien was smiling teasingly and Serena couldn't help but giggle when he brushed his lips over her temple and took her hand in his, kissing it and then the spot where he felt her pulse quicken.

"Wanna go home?"

But Serena didn't hear his question as a message from Zoi appeared on the screen.

'Whatever you do, don't trust Darien. I'll be with you soon. Mina'

The man sensed something change in the woman as he led her to their car. All of sudden she seemed very distant, as if they hadn't shared these two days in the most unusual companionship with flirtatious flavor to it. Something they had never had before.

Darien watched her as once at home the woman excused herself and disappeared behind the closed door of her own room, completely ignoring the man and the door to his room he opened for her.

He closed the door and, being alone, allowed himself to let go of his self-control. Darien was pacing back and forth for quite some time before he reached for his phone and sent a message to a highly trustworthy friend in the bureau. He added the photo of the woman who was currently occupying his wife's room.

'Run this photo with the name Serena Serenity. Let me know about the results ASAP. I wanna know everything. -D.'