Frigga decided Christmas was actually the same as the Norse feast Yule, so she gracefully took charge of organizing a true Asgardian-banquet-slash-Christmas-Dinner. No complaints, because soon the kitchen started to fill itself with piles and piles of food –how they were ever going to eat all that remained a mystery- and it all smelled equally delicious.
To make the gift shopping less tedious (and less expensive, for not everyone had Tony's budget), everyone had to buy only one gift for one other person. Tony and Loki of course bought for each other, but for the others it was a bit of a "Secret Santa" experience.
"Thor, GO AWAY!"
Thor pranced around the house annoying everyone, from Bruce –whom he insisted on kissing since they happened to be under the mistletoe and he wanted to honor Midgardian tradition- to Justin, who was wrapping his gift and tried his best to stop the thunder god from peaking. After being sent from the kitchen –he ate everything-, the lab –Bruce didn't want to risk another kiss-, and the living room –where Peter and Justin were wrapping their gifts in absolute secrecy- he was now annoying Tony in the workshop.
"But I just want to see what you're doing!"
"No, you want to peak at the Christmas gift, which is forbidden! GO AWAY or I tell Loki."
"You're being unfair, man of iron!"
"The party's tonight, you can see it tonight. Is it so hard to have a little patience?"
Another voice interrupted them.
"We're talking about Thor here, right? I think he is the god of impatience."
Loki entered the workshop. He had wanted to remind Tony that he still had his end of the bargain to meet, and then he had overheard a bit of their conversation. Tony sighed internally. He knew why Loki was there. He still hadn't made things up with Pepper.
"Thor, I need to speak with my husband. Please refrain from listening in on us."
Absurdly compliant, Thor got out. Tony sighed deeply and looked at Loki.
"I know, okay? I'm just gathering courage."
Loki looked unconvinced. He approached Tony, took the engineer's face in his hands and passionately kissed him. When he finally withdrew he whispered.
"You don't need courage. Thor has courage. You have me."
(Pagebreak)
And at long last, it was Christmas Eve and they were ready for the party. Thor was hyper like a bouncy ball in a rubber room. He was sort of harassing Natasha with his excitation while they were waiting for the food to be served.
"Please chill out you're getting on my nerves Thor."
"But Lady Natasha, how can you not be excited! There will be gifts!"
"Thor…"
"Be easy on him Tasha, it's his first real Christmas…"
Clint grinned at his friend, who ticked annoyed with her knife against her plate. Justin held up his hand to Thor.
"High five for Team Christmas!"
That turned out to be a bad idea that swung Justin off his chair and made the whole group burst out in laughter.
"Auwch… I think you broke my fucking hand… Merry Christmas to you too…"
Then the doors swung open, and there was Frigga, in all her regal greatness, surrounded by floating pots of warm food. Steve laughed out loud.
"Well, be for Team Christmas as much as you want, I am definitely for Team Frigga on this one!"
The pots contained lots of different foods, all of which Frigga gave unpronounceable names. There were things that were completely unrecognizable, but they also saw smoked mutton ribs, goose roast, and even something that looked a whole lot like complete lamb's heads. As the food landed neatly on the table, the whole group got up from their chairs and applauded for Frigga, who bowed gracefully, then took a seat. Peter looked suspiciously at the lamb's heads. He whispered to Hela.
"Please tell me that's decorative."
The young goddess laughed heartily.
"It's called Smalahove, and it's a traditional Norse dish eaten around Yule."
"It's a head."
"It's very tasty. If you don't like the looks of it I suggest you take the mutton ribs, you'll like those better."
Peter followed his girlfriend's advice, trying not to watch as Hela put a head on her plate among with vegetables and potatoes, and happily cracked it open. Everyone ate; Thor ate the most of them all. With food within range he seemed to have forgotten the previous urgency of gift giving… Frigga surprised everyone by being the second largest eater at the table, which drew the comment from Tony that Thor's appetite was definitely hereditary. The atmosphere was great…
Suddenly Hela got up from the table, a worried expression on her face. Peter followed suit.
"Hela, what is wrong?"
"I… sense something. Wait…"
Everyone waited... Suddenly they all heard an unusual noise, like something hard ticking against the window. Then there was a cawing sound, and a soft but squeaky voice saying.
"This is not the right facility!"
Another cawing noise resounded, and now another, low and deep voice gruffly said.
"Of course this is the right facility."
Hela's worried expression faded. She swiftly pulled away the heavy curtains from the large windows, revealing two rather large ravens sitting on the balcony. She opened the door for them.
"Huginn! Muninn!"
The ravens flew in and settled themselves on Hela's shoulders.
"Good evening, Lady Hela"
"Good ee-ve-niing!"
It had to be said, both the speaking birds had rather annoying voices. Hela didn't seem to mind. She held out her hand and one of them sat down on it. She then proceeded to lovingly pat it on the head. The whole group was rather stunned… well, with exception of the other Asgardians. Frigga smiled, Thor looked worried, Loki just observed. Clint -who else- was the first to comment.
"What did you put in the wine? Did those birds just TALK? Why are there birds in here anyway?"
Natasha poked him.
"Did you just give me permission to throw you out, feathers?"
Frigga clarified.
"Those are Huginn and Muninn, my husband's messengers. They have always had a soft spot for Hela."
Hela had sufficiently caressed and patted both the birds, and now she became serious. She pointed her attention to the one with the high and squeaky voice.
"Muninn, what is your message?"
The raven cawed as if he scraped his throat and then spoke.
"Odin sends his regards to the newlyweds and expects to meet his son in law as soon as possible."
Huginn added then.
"The Allfather also sends greetings to his wife and wishes her a pleasant stay and a safe trip home."
Thor sighed in relief. Apparently the ravens didn't too often bring good news. Frigga smiled.
"You can tell him that I miss him and that I hope Asgard fares well. I will have to discuss his invitation with Loki and Tony first though."
The ravens cawed and looked with beady eyes at the table.
"Now we have resolved that…" Muninn began.
"Is that food you have there?" Huginn finished the sentence.
Hela nodded and made a welcoming gesture to the table. The ravens were polite eaters, despite everything. Sitting on Hela's shoulder they munched away at everything that was left, including the Smalahove. After the first awkwardness, conversation simply continued. The Avengers were used to something by now, they could take a couple of talking birds. Peter felt slightly uncomfortable with a rather big black bird on only centimeters from him. Hela seemed to notice. She turned and introduced him to the ravens.
"Huginn, Muninn, this is Peter. He is my dearest friend."
"You have made friends with a mortal, Lady Hela?"
"Oh shut up Muninn, can't you see the boy's uncomfortable?"
"Hold your beak Huginn! I can say whatever I…"
"You are infuriating! I hope you get bird flu!"
"Why don't they stuff you up for decoration?"
Hela frowned.
"Stop it you two! You're practically worse than Nidhogg and the eagle!"
"But he…"
"But that…"
"No buts."
The two birds made indignant sounds, but stopped their banter. As they flew off to have a chat with Frigga, Peter couldn't help but chuckle.
"Now those are immature."
"Sometimes they have to be reminded that they actually like each other. There are times I believe Odin sends them out to Midgard simply to make sure their endless bickering doesn't drive him nuts."
"So those are your childhood friends?"
Hela softly smiled.
"Ah yes. I'm glad I finally see them again."
"They are…"
"Weird? Loud? Nosy? Annoying the crap out of everyone? Trust me, I know. But they're my friends and I love them."
"Hey, for a moment there I thought you were describing Thor."
Hela giggled at that, then looked at Thor, then giggled again.
"Yeah. The description fits actually."
(Pagebreak)
Loki watched them all, and he felt… happy. It was such an unusual feeling for him, to be at a dinner table enjoying a feast, and actually feeling happy to do so. Back in Asgard he has spent the obligatory feasts with thinking of all the things he would rather do than listen to the mindless conversation and drunken banter of the other guests… while now… there was no place he's rather be. When he watched his daughter he couldn't help but smile; she looked so relaxed, so young… The young Peter Parker had truly proven to be a good friend for her. As he saw how intimate the touches of the two were, Loki hoped that the boy knew the dangers of being with Hela. She was his daughter and he loved her dearly, but she was also the first handmaiden of Death, and far more acquainted with Her than any living thing should be. Loki felt a hand take his. He looked up and saw Tony smile at him. It sent warm shivers through him. Never in his long life he had dared to hope to find someone like Tony… He still wondered what had made him deserve the love of the mortal engineer.
"You look way too far in thought, Reindeer Games… what's the matter?"
"I was just thinking how… happy I am to spend this feast with my… family."
Tony pinched the trickster's hand and smiled at him.
"So am I… So am I, Loki."
(Pagebreak)
And then it was finally time for the gift giving. Thor was back to being a hyper-excited bouncy ball, until Frigga gave him a stern look and sort of ordered him to sit down. Tony ticked a spoon against his glass and announced.
"Okay everyone… Merry Christmas! It's time for GIFTS!"
That got him applause. Because he was so excited, Thor received as first, a gift from Justin. When he opened it he suddenly had something pink and fluffy in his hands. He stared at it non-comprehendingly. Justin explained, giggling.
"I saw those fluffy pink StarkPad covers, and I thought they were totally made for you… But since you are bad with technology I sort of remade it into a pink fluffy Mjolnir cover!"
Thor clearly didn't know how to react to that… But as everyone was chuckling, he put the pink cover over his hammer, making it look again like it had during the prank.
"I will not put this on Mjolnir during battle… It might get dirty."
That drew more laughter from the whole of the group, to Thor's surprise, since he thought he had made a very reasonable statement.
Then Justin received a gift from Steve. It was a framed photograph that was probably taken by JARVIS, of the whole group sleeping on the couch. Loki was curled against Tony, who protectively held an arm around the god, Clint's mouth hung open and he was drooling slightly on Natasha's blouse, the Russian looked surprisingly peaceful with her head against the archer's shoulder, Thor was sprawled out on the carpet, Bruce was sleeping straight up on the couch, Steve sat with his head against the scientist's knees, and Justin and Peter were leaning against each other while sleeping. The only person who was awake in the photo was Hela, who was staring intently at what was probably the television. Justin's face brightened up when seeing it. Steve smiled.
"Your first real family photo."
Justin had to blink away a tear. He looked at the super soldier and then just agve him a heartfelt hug.
"Thanks…"
"You're welcome."
Frigga gave Bruce a whole box of special tea, Thor gave Clint an antique bow, Bruce gave Frigga a beautiful necklace, Natasha gave Hela a pair of shoes and a dress, Clint gave Steve a subscription to a dating site and a ridiculous pink arrow saying he would gladly play cupid for Steve –causing much giggles from the group and a tomato red Steve-, Hela gave Peter a diary, and Peter gave Natasha a box of chocolates. After that, only Loki and Tony remained. Tony proudly handed Loki a box.
"Merry Christmas, Husband."
Loki unwrapped it, and found… a tiara with reindeer antlers. It drew a sarcastic smile from his lips.
"Of course."
"Put it on!"
And Loki obliged. Peter was sure JARVIS was probably saving this in Tony's personal files at the moment… Then Loki noticed there was a post-it note on the bottom of the box.
"Open your hand behind your back, and only show the others if you're okay with it."
At the same moment he felt how Tony pushed a box in his hand. Instinctively Loki knew what it was; he had read up on Midgardian traditions… He bent to Tony and kissed him, whispering.
"At least now my gift won't be awkward…"
With that he handed Tony a similarly shaped box. No one got to see what was in them, but later in the evening they all noticed the two men wore wedding bands; Tony wore a simple white-golden one with an intricate design carved in, Loki wore a yellow golden one with an emerald.
(Pagebreak)
JARVIS played Christmas music, and everyone was having fun… Until Hela looked up apprehensively again, glancing at the door. She called out to the ravens.
"Huginn, Muninn! Go look downstairs."
The two birds, which apparently had the same feeling as Hela, immediately flew up and about. They had just left when JARVIS stopped the music and announced.
"There are two intruders on the down floor."
"You sure those are not the birds?"
"Very sure, sir."
Hela responded immediately. In a haze of black smoke she disappeared. Loki jumped up when he saw that.
"We have to get downstairs, she WILL kill them!"
The whole group hurried downstairs. JARVIS sped up the elevator, but Loki still teleported to be faster. In the hallway the found Hela, holding her arm straight before her, a dark look in her eyes and a petrifying scent hanging around her. From the shadows choking sounds resounded.
"JARVIS, lights!"
The lights went on, and now they could see two men dressed in black choking themselves…
"Hela, stop this!"
Hela didn't respond to her father, she only made a small gesture with her fingers that caused her two victims to press their own throats even harder.
"HELA!"
Loki braced himself and walked up to Hela, putting a hand on her shoulder. There was a bit of bright green light, and Hela went limp in her father's arms. The two intruders managed to let go of their throats, crawling up in fear. Huginn and Muninn found this very amusing, and they started picking with their beaks in the two men, hoping to get a response from them. Peter looked worriedly at his unconscious girlfriend.
"What did you do to her?"
"She'll wake up any minute. I simply had to break her trance."
Indeed, Hela stirred and looked angrily at Loki.
"Why did you do that?"
"I… I'm sorry, daughter… I could not allow you to kill those two men."
"If I wanted them dead, they would be. They needed a lesson. And perhaps a little brain damage."
The others now had cornered the men, who were still being harassed by the ravens. Justin recognized one of them.
"Henry! What the fuck are you doing here?"
"You know him?"
"That's my dad's bodyguard."
The most muscled man of the group tried to get up and said with a raspy voice.
"Your father ordered us to get you back."
Justin's face darkened.
"I don't want to go back."
"He guessed so, that's why he sent us."
Justin slowly shook his head. He felt Steve's hand on his shoulder.
"You don't understand. I don't EVER want to go back! That man is not my family, he never was!"
"Legally you are obliged to…"
Tony interrupted.
"Okay Action Man, don't pretend you know anything about the law. Justin is a part of our family and he's going to stay here. No amount of intimidation will convince him and if you ever try to kidnap him again or intrude this property we won't hold our resident death goddess back when she decides to kill you."
The two men glanced at Hela, who eyed them with a glare that seemed to burn right through them, and shivered. The smaller man did make a remark.
"Hammer will give you hell to pay, Stark."
Tony's lips curled in a smirk.
"Then tell him he can get that right back… Starting with the death of his bodyguards if they don't get off my land right now!"
The two men scurried away.
"You're not going to have them arrested?"
Steve asked. Tony shook his head.
"Nah. Hammer needs to hear the message first."
Justin turned to Hela, who was still angry.
"That was such a Darth Vader move! I'm so gonna call you Darth Vader now… How did you do that?"
"Magic, Justin."
"And how did you know they were there?"
"Magic, Justin."
"Wow, you are seriously awesome. Like seriously! How did you get so awesome!"
Hela glared.
"Let me guess. Magic?"
Loki interfered before Hela could burst out.
"You should leave her alone, Justin."
The boy nodded and went to search his best friend. When he saw that Peter was leading Hela away though he resolved to find Steve. He found the super soldier with Tony and Bruce. Slightly embarrassed he apologized.
"I'm… I'm sorry I blew the Christmas party…"
Tony patted him on the back.
"You didn't blow anything! An attack from a death goddess is what every party needs really!"
"Did… did you mean it? That… that I'm part of the family?"
Bruce smiled at the boy.
"You definitely are."
"Don't ever doubt it, Justin."
"Yeah, and if anyone tries to take you away I'm going to send an army of lawyers on his back. It's a bunch of professional liars and sometimes I think they eat money, but if it keeps you here it's worth it."
Justin blushed at those words.
"Thanks guys…"
Bruce chuckled.
"If anything, we owe you for those pranks on Thor…"
(Author's Notes)
So... Darth Vader moves for Hela. I watched the LEGO Star Wars parodies and I couldn't help myself. Plus, it offers a new nickname in Justin's arsenal! And yeah, Justin is going to be adopted by Tony... or something like that. Yay for Huginn and Muninn! Now they are finally in the story and out of my room they no longer eat my stuff. They also thank MHMH003010002 for the cookies.
I did not make up the lamb's heads. I wish I had. Norse people are strange. Brrr.
Please , please PLEASE REVIEW! Give me a suggestion for a author's gift titbit, you have deserved it lately but I have no inspiration!
and...
Merry Christmas everyone!