The catalyst in the black sheep

Did it really matter? Did any of it really matter?

Sometimes everything seemed like a vicious cycle of life and death; never ending and unrelenting: different actors filling the same roles.

And it was damn-right depressing. Why was it that it seemed no one could ever make a true difference? I could never see the lasting changes that came from the hard ships people faced day after day which led me to believe that it was all pointless.

What was the point? Why did it matter? It was a cycle of self destruction and it would never stop as long as we never stopped repeating the same meaningless motions day after day. year after year, generation after generation. What was tradition if not to be broken?

But even the ones who understood, why it was only meaningfulness because we made it meaningful, by acknowledged and accepting it we where giving it power, but as soon as we stopped it stopped.

When would it stop? When would everyone look up, understand what was happening put down their weapons and back away? Because as long as one man, woman ,child didn't understand- drifted along with the crowd unsure of their place in the world, their hopes and dreams- we would be lost because in that child's ignorance we would break the system.

So, why?

But maybe it's me. Maybe I'm that child the one that tried to break the system, the one that was found lying in a puddle of their own life-blood in the darkest place in an alleyway the next morning that everyone pretended the stink didn't come from. The black sheep.

But maybe that's all wrong and everything is actually right and the only thing that I'll succeed in when trying to change the system is breaking myself.

But maybe I'm just over analyzing everything.

Or maybe I'm already broken.

Truth be told I was thinking of Sakura when writing this, this seems more philosophical than angsty. I was going to attempt 'flowers' however my mind drew a blank so instead i decided to simply type. I have a feeling that this might turn into more of that then anything else.

I was listening to Border by Funkist, they're not very well know, I'm not sure if they would fall under Indie or J-Pop. I'll leave that to you.