As promised my darlings, here's the next chapter. Enjoy!

As you may have noticed, I'm sending personal replies to reviews now rather than posting them on here - I hope that's cool with everyone. Right! Onwards!

Chapter Six - Everything's Changing

JD POV

By the time I'd managed to fall into my door and collapse on the couch, my mind was racing a million miles per second. I could only remember up to the moment when Dr. Cox walked out of my bedroom door so that I could take off my trousers. Does that mean he came back in the morning just to get me for work?

HE UNDRESSED ME.

Yeah, I admit that I was having just a little trouble getting over that part. But it was just the way it all happened, the fact that he must've gave a damn to actually bother drying me off. He took care of me! True, I was drunk and so was he, but still. Dr. Cox held me in his arms! Oh my GOD…

Get a hold of yourself! It's not like he really cares…

YES HE DOES! He hugged me properly - not only that but -

I shook my head firmly and ran my fingers through my hair. He was my mentor, not a demented father figure. I wasn't looking for a father figure despite what had happened to my Dad, and even if I was, Dr. Cox wasn't like that. I didn't look at him and think "father" - I didn't even think of him as a crazy Uncle. He was something totally separate to that, something more and something less; and despite the way he treated me, I was pretty sure I meant something to him too.

Okay, that was it - I had to go to sleep. These last few days had been a strain on me in a lot of ways, and now I was starting to get delusional. Because the sad fact of the matter was that, no matter what he did for me or how he did it, Dr. Cox saw me as nothing but a cameo role - he had said so himself. He would never respect me in my own right as a doctor or a person, and let's face it, I knew that.

Sighing, I turned over on the couch and closed my eyes. Did Dr. Cox even remember undressing me? Did he remember me flirting drunkenly with him? (At least I didn't get handsy…) Did he secretly hate me for making him feel like he had to look after me?

I groaned into the cushion.

X X X X X

Elliot POV

Even though things weren't exactly great between me and JD, I still wanted to be there for him. It was the kind of thing I always ended up doing when someone broke my heart - first I would do the whole angry-glare thing, make them feel like crap for a while, and then, once the air had cooled, I'd try and do whatever I could to make them feel good about themselves. For JD, that came along much faster than usual - what with the whole Dad-death and all.

Of course, JD being JD, went off the deep end and turned into a social recluse. I tried to do what I could, like forcing Dr. Cox to hug him (which did not go well) and trying to talk to him when one of his patients was diagnosed with stomach cancer, but it was hard. Really hard.

Aaaand then it happened. Throwing caution to the wind (and also my conscience) I got it on with Dan. As in, JD's brother. As in…

Total bitch.

I couldn't help it. He was so different to JD - thoughtless, sexy in a weird, confident sort of way and generally the complete opposite to JD - which, at the time, was exactly what I was looking for.

When JD found out about us, he was obviously hurt. I felt awful; I didn't mean to upset him, especially not so soon after his Dad's death… and I'm really not a bitch. Thoughtless at times, it's true, I have to admit to my faults (or my therapist says so anyway) - but I'm not out to make him unhappy. Of course, then it turns out JD doesn't care at all and we have red hot sex five times (Dan and me, not JD and me - red hot doesn't exactly describe JD well).

To be honest… it was kind of stupid of me to think that maybe he really was hurt about me and Dan. And as much as he pretends, it's also obvious that Molly is just another distraction. They'll keep coming along until he really accepts how he feels, and until that day, I know I'll have to watch as he breaks the heart of girl after girl after girl… but no one can force the truth on him. He'll have to figure it out for himself. He's smart enough when he sets his mind to it, so hopefully soon he'll stop messing around and figure out who he really cares about.

Course, we all assume we know who it is - or at least, Carla and I do. If we are right, and JD does have feelings for them (no matter how much he ignores those feelings) -well, we also accept that we'll have to be there when he does acknowledge them and when he gets his heart broken. Because there's no way he won't. There's no chance in hell that they'll return his feelings.

So, on that note, part of me hopes he never figures it out.

But, as they say, the truth will out! We'll just have to see.

X X X X X

Dr. Cox POV

"For the fifth time, Laverne, would ya please put down the phone and pass me that chart over there? I know, I know, I SO totally just said that, and I am SO totally giving you attitude - but come on, it's your job as a secretary - no, sorry, a nurse - to do as I ask. So go on. Do it. Earn those bucks."

Aw hell, I couldn't help it. I was in a great mood. Jordan didn't come home, I had downed a bottle and a half of scotch in one night and didn't have one inch of a hangover. I flashed my pearly whites to Nurse Roberts and grabbed the chart she practically threw at me, whirling around and heading straight into Mrs. Berry's room.

"Well there Mrs. B, how're you feeling today?" I asked, flipping her chart over and re-reading what we already knew was true. Well. Everyone but her. "Apart from shell-shocked by my appearance, which I know is a surprise in itself - but I promise you, you deserve every single second of my time."

She smiled and winked at me. "I'm certain I must've done something brilliant in my lifetime to earn such a reward as you, Doctor…"

"Cox," I filled in, flashing her that special grin. "And you may be pleased to know that I am now officially your doctor. No more incompetent residents for you, Mrs. Berry."

"What a shame," she said, resting her head back on her pillow, suddenly looking quite tired. "I rather liked that Dr. Dorian. He was quite charming in a feminine sort of way."

I grimaced, knowing all too well what she was talking about. "Rest assured, you're in much safer hands now."

Her eyes rested on the chart in my hands. "Are you going to tell me what's on that thing, or am I going to have to arm-wrestle you for it?" She flexed her thin arm. "I warn you, I'm stronger than I look."

I laughed, but only for a second - I had to do this, had to get in there and tell her what was wrong with her before I got too attached. What was it with spending time with Newbie? "It turns out that what we're looking at here is cancer."

I hated doing this. I always made it sound so damned impersonal, like it didn't matter. Just because I dealt with it every day didn't mean that they did. Mrs. Berry, far from looking horrified or bursting into justified tears, nodded. "Go on, Dr. Cox."

I nodded. "We're going to do an endoscopy and a CT scan to see how developed it is, and so we can define what course of treatment would be best for you. The endoscopy might feel a little uncomfortable, so we'll just give you a sedative so that you don't feel anything. With the CT scan, you won't feel a thing. You'll just have to lie still for about 20 minutes."

She just nodded again, staring at her hands. After a few moments of silence, she raised her head once again and looked me straight in the eye.

"How long do I have?"

I hated that question. I sat on the edge of her bed. "Until we've done the CT scan, we can't be sure."

"A guess?"

I looked down. Her age was against her, as were her symptoms. It had said on her history that she'd lost over two stone in that year alone - things weren't looking good, and I didn't want to tell her that.

"Dr. Cox, I'm a big girl. I can handle the truth."

I met her eyes again, and reached out, resting my hand on hers. "From the symptoms you're showing, your age and your initial examination, it looks, to me, like you're in the third stage of the cancer, maybe even the fourth… when you were first examined on arrival, a quick check over revealed tenderness in your stomach, pain to the touch. It's possible the cancer has spread past the wall of your stomach and into other places nearby, such as your liver, your kidneys. I'd say, if I'm right… maybe a year or two."

She took in a deep breath, closing her eyes and squeezing my hand. For a few moments I thought she had fallen asleep she was so still, but she opened her eyes once again, focusing on our hands in her lap.

"If that's how it is, then that's how it is. Maybe it hasn't spread too far. Maybe the endoscopy and the CT scan will show up different."

I looked at her, at her pale skin and tired blue eyes, and shook my head.

"Two years is a long time, Mrs. Berry. And people live beyond that. And as you say… maybe I'm wrong. But do me a favour, sweetheart," I squeezed her hand gently. "Don't hope too hard. Because as much as I hate to admit it right here, right now - I'm rarely wrong."

I stood up, taking the chart from my lap and walked to the door. Before I left, I turned to her, taking my time. "You know if you need anything, anyone… just ask."

She nodded again, smiling a little, before closing her eyes.

I didn't blame her. If I were her, I'd want to block out the reality and harshness of life too.

JD POV

Oookay, just stay calm… you might not see him. He might have taken today off with a massive hangover - you might get lucky.

"Bambi, Dr. Cox is looking for you," Carla's voice called from somewhere down the corridor - damn! That wily minx, he always seemed to know when I wanted to avoid him…

Suddenly there was a flash of brown and green, my two favourite colours in this hospital - I leapt over and threw my arms around him, Brown Bear, Chocolate Bear, SUPER Chocolate Bear… the one person who would protect me against the horror that was Percival Cox.

"Whoa dude, what the hell?!" Turk cried, alarmed, keeping his hands away from me in an attempt at masculinity. God, I loved him. He smelled like waffles on a fresh, sunny morning. "No hugs 'til after 12, you know that!"

I tore myself away from him and threw myself dramatically over the nurses station desk. He leaned his elbow next to me, his eyes gazing down on me sympathetically.

"Cox is after you, huh?"

"Totally," I mumbled, trying to ignore the way I yearned to hold him once more, to breathe in that delicious smell. "God knows how long he's been hunting for me, I threw my pager into the parking lot yesterday…"

"Yeah I know, Carla found it and gave it to him this morning," Turk admitted, looking abashed. I groaned.

"Damn, so that's why he wants me? He's going to rip me a new one."

"Yeah, he seems in pretty shitty mood actually," my best friend mused, shaking his head. "Banging around, throwing charts everywhere, yelling at Franklin about something or other… I'd steer clear of him if you can. Just deal with your patients and do NOT go in the doctor's lounge. I heard he's commandeered it for his own 'private use'…whatever that means."

Oh god. It's his personal torture chamber…

"Anyway, where were you last night buddy? Carla left you like, 8 messages."

Only 8? No more waffles for her! Damn, what was my obsession with waffles this morning?

"I dunno, I felt kind of bummed out after getting Mrs. Berry's results back, so I stayed here for a few hours after my shift."

"And?"

I glanced up at him; he was looking at me with sparkling eyes, as if I had some super-huge gossip to tell him. I blinked, confused.

"And what?"

Turk grinned, flinging his arm around my shoulders. "Laverne told me she saw you leave with Dr, Cox at half 12. Come on buddy, you weren't home 'til at least one thirty! What'd you do?!"

"Nothing, really," I replied honestly, wondering why he was making such a big deal out of an hour. "I gave him a lift home on Sasha -" Turk made a small noise and clapped me on the back, " - and then I had a couple of drinks with him. Nothing major."

He was still looking at me in that weird way, almost expectantly - what else was he looking for? I shrugged.

"What else were you expecting?"

He stared at me for a moment, as if to see if I was being serious, before he shrugged too, looking somewhat disappointed. "Ah, nothing. I knew they were just yanking my chain."

"About what?" I asked, suddenly feeling somewhat suspicious. Something wasn't right about the way Turk had approached my 'secret hour' - it seemed oddly girly… suddenly it clicked. "What have Carla and Elliot said to you?!"

Turk winked and was suddenly on the other side of the nurses station. Damn he was fast!

"Nothing important, Vanilla Bear. They're just being their usual, gossiping selves."

And then he was gone. What the hell?! What had they been saying?

I turned and slowly made my way towards Mrs. Berry's room, feeling a sense of dread erupt over me. As I pushed her door open, my heart leapt into my throat - her bed was empty. Perfectly made.

Where the heck is she?

Swiftly, my mind filled in the missing information. She was 66 years old with what looked like the advanced stages of stomach cancer. Chances are, it had caught up with her before I had a chance to.

I couldn't help it; tears filled my eyes overwhelmingly, so much that I had to shut the door. I didn't even get a chance to tell her what was wrong with her - how had she died so fast? Nope, there was no time to even think about it… the tears had spilled over and I was officially crying. I hadn't done it since Dad's death, and apparently I needed too. Soon I was in the full-blown sobbing stage and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I rarely cried, despite my sensitivity, so this was draining me quick and fast. I turned to rest my head on the window of the door, tears still streaming down my face, when I realised the blinds were still open; standing halfway down the corridor was Dr. Cox, looking murderous, eyes sweeping along the floor - no doubt to see if I was there.

His eyes stopped on Mrs. Berry's door, and just as they did, I drew the blinds, panicking - my heart was racing with a weird kind of fear, and I desperately sank to the ground, crawling into the corner in a fraught attempt of hiding.

Not now, not now! I can stand his anger and disgust any other time but not now… not when I've just let go of all my damned inhibitions and am standing here with streaky-cry-face…

I brought my knees up to my chin and buried my head in my arms, hoping crazily that it would make me invisible, and that he wouldn't come in and see me like this -

"Newbie, where the hell -"

The door slammed open and I saw from the crack between my arms that he was standing there, just a few metres away from me, no doubt pissed off and ready to throw me against the wall again. I shut my eyes tight, hoping that he hadn't seen me (it's amazing what you can convince yourself when you're desperate) and waited for him either to leave, or to grab me by the shoulder and pull me up.

Neither happened.

The door closed, but I could see he was still standing there. Why wasn't he leaving? More importantly, why wasn't he yelling at me to stop acting like such a goddamn girl? I almost let out another sob, somehow managing to control the noise - but I knew my body shook, and I knew he would see.

Please go, just for now, yell at me later…

His footsteps crossed the room to where I was sitting until he was standing right in front of me. Still he didn't touch me.

"It's not what you think, Newbie."

His voice was gruff and still sounded angry, but I could tell he was working hard to swallow it. That thoughtfulness alone made me breathe in sharply, my body shaking again.

"She's just having a CT scan."

So that was where she was. Did that mean he'd told her already? Why?

Frustratingly, that didn't seem to help. Instead, the tears started escaping my eyes again - why the hell was I crying now? Why couldn't I control my emotions like normal men?

I knew why, though; part of me was just pitying myself, allowing myself to feel as pathetic as I probably looked - but the bigger part of me had just accepted that I really was not in a good place, and that the more I tried to work and pull myself together when I really wasn't ready for it, the harder I would find each day.

But I didn't know how else to act.

"Say there, Newbie… are you crying?"

"No," I choked out, vigorously shaking my head. Dr. Cox was silent for a few seconds.

"… I hate to disagree with you there, but I'm pretty certain you are."

I wrenched my head up and looked at him, not caring about the tears streaked down my cheeks, the lone teardrop balancing on the edge of my nose. "What do YOU care anyway?"

Dr. Cox looked momentarily surprised; but then the old look of indifference passed over and he was normal again.

"Alarming though this may be, Alice, I have come to care for you… a very littlelittlelittlelittlelittle bit, mind you. Even if it's only because I need to know if you're good to work for the rest of the day or not."

I shook my head, forcing myself to stand up. That was it. His "don't care" attitude was starting to get too much for me, and I wasn't in the mood. I was practically breaking down in front of him and all he could do was be an asshole.

"Screw you Dr. Cox," I spat, pushing myself off of the wall and past him, making my way for the door. "Screw you. You've done nothing but mess me around since my Dad died, and I'm through with it."

I threw the door open blindly, not having the faintest idea where I was going. I stumbled my way to the doctors lounge and pushed the door open, forgetting the one piece of advice Turk had given me earlier that day. Dr. Cox strode in after me, slamming the door shut and (to my horror) locking it.

"Now wait just one second Newbie," he growled, advancing on me - I moved to the other side of the room quickly. "I took care of your patients. I let you into my apartment, a rarity for anyone let alone you. I even told your patient she pretty much only had two years to live - and you act like a teenage girl? Goddamn Newbie, didn't your parents teach you respect?"

"Ha! Because you're the very essence of it, aren't you?" I said wildly, throwing my hands up. "You always treat people with respect no matter how bad things are, don't you? You never do inappropriate things when people are at their most vulnerable, do you?"

Dr. Cox was silent for a few moments, before he folded his arms. "Care to elaborate?"

"With pleasure," I cried. "First you act like a complete asshole when all I wanted was a bit of sympathy. Then, you mock me by offering a hug that you don't even want to give, treating me like some idiot! Worse still, when I call you on it, you end up making me feel even more stupid and more vulnerable by, quite frankly, harassing me about something that happened against my will -"

My eyes were getting hazy, knowing I was out of control, knowing soon it would be the end of my life AGAIN, in this same room AGAIN, " - and THEN, when you'd think that you'd just get the point and leave me be, you get me drunk, undress me - yes, that's right, I remember," I shouted, seeing the slight surprise on his face. "And you let me embarrass myself even further! I mean, what is your problem, Perry? Do you get a kick out of making me feel stupid? Does it make you feel good to know I feel so damned vulnerable right now, especially when I'm with you?"

He was slowly walking towards me, his eyes glazed over, and I knew I should run, but my feet wouldn't move.

"Is it the fear in my eyes? The pain in my voice? Or is it the way that I let you turn everything into a fucked-up game of cat and mouse? Do you think I like being the mouse? Chased and abused all the fucking time -"

Suddenly he's right in front of me, my back pressed into the wall, his nose almost touching mine. I could feel his body heat through his clothes, through my scrubs, and it was as his eyes met mine that I was truly aware of how far I'd pushed him.

"You don't know the meaning of the word abuse, Newbie," he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. It didn't have to be; I could hear every word loud and clear - he was standing close enough. "You don't know what it's like to truly be used, abused, treated like shit day in day out with no control over it whatsoever."

I could see his pulse flickering in his temple, fast, hard. I gulped. I tried to move, but it just made my nose brush over his, causing me to freeze completely; now was not the time to accidentally Eskimo-kiss Dr. Cox. I checked, thinking over that thought.

Was there ever a right time?!

"I, however, have some experience in that aspect, and let me tell you - it's not a thing like what I do to you. There's no answers, no escape routes, no magical miracle getaway plans - you can't leave. You don't have the choice in the matter. You, my friend, have a choice. If you hate the way I treat you so damn much, you can walk out that door and never come back. You can get a new job, start a new life, forget I ever existed."

I don't want to.

"As for all the things you took such great pains to mention, let us not forget that you shoved me three times, despite the warning I gave you. It was also you that decided it'd be a good idea to get an erection whilst I had pinned you against the wall, a little like you are now -" oh god, don't say that, things might happen again, " - and, that when it came to me suggesting to help you out - that's right, Tiffany, I remember exactly what I said - I was merely just trying to make the situation a little easier to handle. A little less awkward."

"Bullshit," I whispered, not realising I had spoken until his eyes flashed at me. I saw his jaw tighten, his muscles flex.

"Pardon me?"

His eyes were icy cold… shit, they were so cold they burned. I tried to shut my eyes, but what with the body heat and the warm breath against my lips, I started to lose myself in it and - oh god, not again!! I forced my eyes open and quickly spoke, desperate to distract him from what was happening below waist-level. "You didn't do that to make it easier, especially not for me."

"Elaborate. Now."

I gulped.

"You knew how… how uncomfortable I was. You knew I was… in trouble." I ignored his snort at my way of describing a hard on. "Not to mention everyone knows that ears are one of the most sensitive places on a human body." I took a deep breath. "I think…"

I hesitated. This could be very, very dangerous. I slowly let my eyes meet Dr. Cox's, which were focused on mine in a terrifyingly intense way. I looked away.

"You think what?" His voice was that low, intense whisper again - it reminded me of what we were talking about, and I shivered. Noticeably.

Shit.

"I think that you did it on purpose to make it even harder for me. I think you wanted me to be even more… uncomfortable."

There - I'd said it. I shut my eyes and leaned my head back against the wall, wishing desperately that I could take it back. Wishing desperately that I wasn't getting hard right that second. Wishing Dr. Cox would move away from me so I could pull myself together.

This is not normal.

"And so what… those comments, those naughty little sentences you came up with whilst you lay on the floor, waiting for me to undress you, were just coincidental? You didn't say them because subconsciously, you wanted me to do it again?"

WHAT?!

"Now I'm not saying that I did it for the reason you're suggesting; nor am I saying I didn't get a kick out of it. Because you see," he said, his nose nudging mine accidentally, causing me to push myself even harder into the wall behind me. "Those baby blues of yours just happen to have the most delightful way of looking sad, vulnerable, scared and lonely - all at once. And when they do that, when they gaze up at me in that way that would make anyone want to hug you and take care of baby Dorian - well, it sort of has the opposite effect."

I gulped for what had to be the third or fourth time that day. "You… want to push me away and abandon me?"

Dr. Cox grinned. I gulped.

"Not quite, Newbie. You see, when you look at me like that, I get this overwhelming urge… it seems that at that moment of terror, vulnerability, whatever the hell it is - it seems that you completely lose control of yourself. And that makes me… want to… take control."

I blinked. "You want to make me your bitch?"

Is it just me, or did his body just get a little closer?

"Wrong. Not my bitch. I'm not going to make you dress in leather and do naughty, naughty things to me when no one else is looking," he smirked, seeing my face flush bright pink. "I hate to disappoint you, Newbie, but I don't want you to be my girlfriend."

I shook my head, wishing he would move away.

"Then what do you want? To fuck around with my head? 'Cos you're doing a pretty good job of that right now."

He laughed, his body moving slightly against mine as he did. Suddenly, without warning, his lips were against my ear again, harsh, hot -

"That sounds about right. Like you said earlier, it's just a game of Cat and Mouse. I chase you, I catch you… I play with you… and then just when you think I might kill you - I let you go."

He suddenly moved away, leaving me cold, breathless, and trembling. He was only a few feet away, but the distance was enough to make me feel, as I had said earlier, abandoned. I clenched my shaking hands at my sides, trying to control myself. What the hell was he doing to me? Why was he doing this? What was he getting out of this?

Dr, Cox was watching me, seeing what I would do next. I opened my mouth to say something, but my mouth was dry - I couldn't move my lips or tongue to even form a word. I shake my head firmly, trying to pull myself together, but all I can think of is how I can still feel his lips at my ear, still feel his body on mine.

How hard I still am.

"Oh," I murmur quietly, shutting my eyes and letting the wall support my body. My legs are shaking too hard, and I know that if I try and stand up alone, I'll fall down. Suddenly I'm crying again, silently; tears just start streaming down my face - what the hell?!

I shake my head violently, trying to get rid of them, but they won't go - I glance up, trying to see through the haze of tears that are now clouding my vision, but all I can see is a white blur making its way towards me. I turn away, feeling sick with myself, determined that he won't do any of that to me again - but as I do his hands catch my arms, holding me upright. For a few seconds, they stay there, warm and strong, holding me together - until suddenly they let go, and he's gone, unlocking the door and striding out.

Leaving me alone.