Here it is, folks; the long awaited Chapter Fifteen! JOY! As ever, hope you like it. Reviews are SO appreciated it's unreal. The amount for Chapter Fourteen was… immense. LOVE TO YOU.

Chapter Fifteen - Clandestine

JD POV

I woke up the next morning with a pounding headache, an unfamiliar piece of material on my skin and a smile on my lips. A strange combination, but it felt good. Even the headache…

Particularly when I looked at my cell.

The Big C (09:51) I hate to say it Newbie, but I slept like a log last night.

It was sent over an hour ago… I felt a delicious rush of surprise that he had sent me a text unprompted. Instantly my fingertips went to work.

And why would that be?

The Big C (11:02) I can't say for sure, but I'm relatively sure it's something to do with the 'events' of last night.

I grinned gleefully, the sun shining on my skin despite the storm raging outside of my window.

Oh REALLY? Hmmm, sounds like you had a good night.

The Big C (11:10) Not bad at all. A certain half an hour sticks out in my mind.

My stomach jumped at the mention of it.

Why Dr. Cox, could you possibly be referring to… no, I won't say it. I'll just let you think about it.

The Big C (11:19) Could you enjoy this any more?

I shook my head, grin even wider despite feeling that it might break my face.

Depends.

The Big C (11:25) On…?

On what happens next.

The Big C (11:29) On call room on the third floor, 8am.

My hands shook slightly as I replied.

I don't start until nine.

The Big C (11:35) Gives us just enough time then.

Oh god, why was my heart racing so fast? Yes, our… well, not relationship but whatever you wanted to call it had certainly crept up a notch but it's not like we were dating. We weren't in a relationship, we weren't 'exclusive', weren't in love…

My heart hit against my chest hard enough to hurt.

I wasn't in love with him… but did that genuinely mean I didn't love him at all? I tried to push the possibility out of my head but it was too late; already I felt the ache of missing him, missing his company, his crooked grin, the way his eyes flashed when he looked at me - but that was okay, right? I missed Turk when we didn't spend time together. Then again, I didn't exactly ache from it. I just… appreciated it when I spent time with him.

No, this kind of missing someone was definitely different. I tried to think of how I'd felt when Elliot and I were dating, or when I'd had feelings for her - yeah, sometimes it had ached, but mostly I'd just ached for the companionship, for the feeling of being with someone in that way whereas now… now all I could think of was how much I missed Dr. Cox. Perry. I smiled idly as I remembered the promise of punishment for using his name the night before.

So where did this leave me? I missed him. Big deal. Still, as I tried to define my feelings I couldn't help but acknowledge how strong they had become. All I could think about was him, seeing him tomorrow, working with him, simply being with him. I shut my eyes and pressed my palms into them but it just made the images stronger, of how he had looked when he'd first dragged me into the room, how his expression had completely changed when I'd shown the first signs of fear when he'd prompted me to touch him as he wanted to touch me… I was probably wrong, but the way he'd looked just seemed so caring, like it made him feel something other than his hazed lust when he'd seen my own emotions spasm. Like maybe he actually didn't want to hurt or upset me.

Like he truly gave a damn about more than just the sexual thrill of it all.

My phone suddenly went off in my hand.

The Big C (11:57) Getting too real for you, Newbie?

Yes, it was… not in the way that I imagined he'd be assuming though. He probably thought that sneaking around, being sexual with a man, those sorts of things were bothering me but the truth of it - the truth that I truly did not want to admit - was that he made me feel something completely unfamiliar, something so strong and intense that no one had ever inspired in me before, and that was what was becoming too real for me. The possibility of wanting to be more than just a whirlwind sexual experience, the prospect of wanting more from him -

The very real possibility that I could fall in love with him.

"JD? JD, are you awake?"

Carla's voice was quiet outside of my door - I wanted to ignore her, to be honest, to lay in my bed and think of all of the things I knew I shouldn't but…

"Yeah - what's up?"

She gently opened the door, sliding in and shutting it again; she was still in her pyjamas, a cup of something hot in her hands (I quite happily accepted it as she held it out to me - god knows I needed something in my system other than alcohol) and a concerned expression. This did not deplete as she gazed upon the waistcoat that I still wore, the one that clearly did not belong to me.

She sat on the edge of my bed.

"What are you doing?"

I didn't pretend to misunderstand. "I honestly don't know."

"He's practically married to Jordan, has a child with her… I know you have feelings for him JD, but you need to step back -"

"I know, I know," I muttered, pressing my palms into my eyes again. "I've just started accepting these stupid feelings and now I can't seem to think of anything else! The worst part of it is, Dr. Cox probably doesn't feel the same as I do."

Carla rolled her eyes. "You think that's the worst thing? You'd do better to think of it as the best thing! You're so focused right now on how you feel that you're not even considering what it would do to Jordan if she found out."

My tired eyes met hers. "I can't help it, Carla. I can't think straight."

A smile twitched on her lips; I inwardly cursed my phrasing.

"What I mean is… arrgh, I can't even explain it! Before now it was just a thrill - and a pain in the ass, but mostly just the thrill of not knowing what was going on and constantly being on edge but now it's like I… like I…"

"Love him?"

"NO!" I yelled, covering my mouth when she shushed me urgently; Turk must have been in the living room. "No, I don't love him, at least I'm not in love with him… but yeah, my feelings are really strong! As in, stupidly strong, so strong that I can't think of anything but him, missing him, wanting him, and it's just… ARRGH."

Her responding smile was gentle, fond and somewhat sympathetic - it made my stomach twist. I knew what that smile meant.

"You think I should make sure nothing like… that ever happens again, right?"

Carla hesitated.

"I… think that you need to decipher what it is that Dr. Cox wants, how far he's willing to go."

I blushed, finding it not at all difficult to remember how far we'd already gone. She rolled her eyes.

"Not like that, Bambi. What I mean is… you need to find out what this is to him. Whether it's just a quick fling, sex, nothing else attached, or if there's some possibility of it become more than that… if he'd be willing to break up his family to be with you. That kind of thing."

I shook my head, slowly at first but steadily it became more like I was trying to shake the words from my head than agreeing or disagreeing with what she was saying. "I don't want that, Carla. I don't want to ruin his or anyone else's life."

Her hand on mine was warm, comforting. "I know you don't. I doubt he's even thought that far ahead, but it's your responsibility now - he's not thinking about the future or about the possibility of real feelings. Someone has to, and in this instance I'm thinking it's going to have to be you."

My eyes shut of their own accord at the mere thought of bringing up the subject. "Do you think I have to do it right away?"

She looked at me for a few moments, thoughtful, before she squeezed my hand lightly and shrugged.

"That's your call, JD. Not mine."

Damn. I hated when people said things like that. How was I supposed to know what the right thing to do was? Then again, that was a stupid thought in itself; I knew what the right thing was. I just didn't want to do it.

I pulled my hand away from hers and stood up. "You know, I don't think it's even going to last that long. It's probably nothing to worry about."

Carla shrugged again, standing beside me. "Whatever you say, Bambi. I've got to get ready for work." She patted my shoulder, before turning and slipping out of my room, shutting the door quietly behind her. I sat down again.

My phone buzzed.

The Big C (12:16) It's your call, kid.

X X X X X

It was 7:50. I was alone in the on call room, sitting on the very edge of one of the beds, legs bouncing up and down nervously. Three times now I'd stood up and ventured out into the hallway, planning to just get on with my day and therefore making it plain that I didn't want this 'thing' to go on any further - but each time I'd get to the nurses station and turn back. Whether I liked it or not, my head wasn't winning this battle.

That did, however, make me slightly disturbed at the choice my heart seemed to be making.

My muscles tensed, preparing to stand up and leave for the fourth time when the door flew open; wearing dark blue scrubs trousers, a similarly coloured t-shirt and, of course, his white coat with the sleeves pushed up his strong forearms, he strode in without looking at me, turned, shut the door and then took two long strides to reach me where I still sat.

"C'mere," he growled, grabbing me by the front of my scrubs and literally pulling me up until my lips met his - my heart skipped a few beats, leaving me breathless once the whole sequence had caught up with me. Rather than stop the kiss and calmly talk to him about our 'situation' as I had planned to do, I found my hands reaching up and grasping his head between them, my fingers knotting into his hair and holding on tightly as I forced my lips even harder against his. This flame, this literal firework in the pits of my stomach (and lower) was burning right through me, heating me from the inside and making me feel that I would explode if he stopped kissing me, stopped searching for the bottom of my scrubs top and eventually managing to connect the warm, rough skin of his hands with the warmer still skin of my back, urging me closer… god, it was like a drug.

"You're early," he muttered against my lips between kisses; we'd been so wrapped up in our lip movements that we'd managed to stumble halfway across the room. He manoeuvred me so that as he pushed his chest against mine we stumbled back to where we had been - my legs hit the edge of the bed and I let my body fall back, my back landing on the firm mattress as he fell with me. He landed on top of me, his hands just managing to stop him from completely winding me, forcing my words to come out breathlessly -

"I missed you."

He tensed, motionless, just the sound of our loud breathing in the quiet room as my heart hammered hard, as it always seemed to do no matter what we were doing so long as he was near me. His eyes pierced through mine, our chests rising and falling in unison as the words I had let escape seemed to encase our bodies in an invisible barrier. I regretted what I'd said with a cold realisation that I had said something extremely inappropriate to what this 'arrangement' was about, particularly as he shifted so that his weight was even less of a pressure on my body.

I shut my eyes against his gaze and the frustration at yet another mistake I had made, all fire and flame burnt out in my body.

Finally, he pushed himself up and off of me completely, standing up and walking towards the door. I sat up, feeling the iron-heavy weight of panic start to build. "No, Dr. Cox, don't -"

He whirled, hands reaching up to rest on his head. "I shouldn't have let it go this far, kid. I should have realised where this was headed and I'm sorry, I truly am… but I'm going to walk out of this door and we're never going to speak of any of… of this again." His eyes were resigned. The panic turned into dread, hollow and somehow more uncomfortable than the panic.

I had two choices: I could either let him walk out, forget whatever we'd started and force myself to move on from feelings that would no doubt just end up in getting me verbally and emotionally broken down into pieces… or I could lie, keep up the charade that I was still as emotionally uninvolved as he was - yes, I liked that idea! I took barely any time in making the decision, knowing with a little fizz of excitement in my stomach that I could still have him, still have his presence in my life outside of the hospital whilst keeping up the pretence that it was nothing more than physical gratification.

Time to put those acting classes in college to good use.

"What're you talking about? It hasn't gone anywhere, or at least nowhere that we have to avoid."

His hands slowly slid back down to his sides. "You don't say you miss people when it's just about a meaningless release, Newbie."

Pain pierced me at his definition of what had been happening between us, but that was unimportant - it had to be unimportant. Nothing was more important than salvaging what I could, no matter the cost.

"It just slipped out." I shrugged, shifting the importance and truth of what I had said to the floor and discarding it. "What I meant to say is that I'd missed this."

Dr. Cox's eyes narrowed slightly. "And what, in your head, is this?"

I looked at him, forcing myself not to waver, forcing my gaze not to flicker and reveal that this nonchalance was a complete and utter sham. I pushed the word out.

"Temporary."

Dr Cox POV

I hissed a sigh of relief through my teeth. For a few seconds I had questioned his offhand manner, wondered how he had gone from intense to casual in mere seconds - I knew that I hadn't imagined the look of frustration when he'd realised he'd ruined the admittedly enjoyable moment from before - but there was a part of me that wanted to believe him. I looked at him for a few moments more, analysing his body language - slightly tense but generally relaxed - and focusing hard on his eyes… they were always a dead giveaway. Out of anything he had no control over, it was his eyes. Always had been.

I waited a moment longer, knowing from experience that leaving a silence for longer than necessary usually broke through any amateur liar's story, and was rewarded for my uncharacteristic patience; slowly, and probably subconsciously, his left hand twitched slightly, smoothing down a crease that wasn't there on the bedcover. Maybe it was a simple tiny body malfunction but I was almost sure that he -

"Dr. Cox -!"

An intern threw themselves into the room, hair unkempt and eyes wide; in the background I could hear the sound of a patient coding. I tore my eyes from Newbie and headed out of the door instantly - I knew my priorities. If anything, they at least were still clear to me.

X X X X X

Joanna (15:42) Can we meet up on your next break?

I sighed, flipping my phone shut. I knew I was due a break, seeing as I hadn't had one and I'd been working for over six hours, but knowing that if I took one I'd have to talk to Newbie…

"Aw dammit," I cursed under my breath, flipping the phone back open and quickly typing out a reply.

Am heading to the cafeteria now.

Joanna (15:47) Somewhere less public?

Momentarily I considered the idea that he wanted to pick up where we should have left off had he not made the re-he-heally stupid mistake of saying something hideously inappropriate. I changed my course of direction to the on call room on this floor, shaking my head in disbelief at myself.

On call room, 5th floor.

Joanna (15:50) On my way.

The moment he pushed the door open and had taken one step inside he began jabbering away, pacing back and forth in front of me and waving his hands around.

He definitely took some acting classes in college.

"I know that you're worried that this is going to get complicated and everything, but I want you to know that it's not going to be an issue. We are, as we've always been, mentor and mentee -"

I snorted in disagreement. "We've never been that, Newbie, let's have no delusions here."

"Okay, fine, I'm flexible with titles," he said hastily, waving his hands even more flamboyantly to brush off the unimportant detail. "I just need you to know that we're on the same page and that we both want the same things out of this."

"Elaborate."

His pacing seemed to slow slightly. "Purely physical. Hastened meetings in empty rooms, sneaking around, whatever you want -"

"Waaaait a minute," I interrupted, raising my hands in front of me to stop him from his fast-paced ramblings. "As much as I hate to give you this kind of freedom of choice, this isn't just about what I want here. What do you want?"

His pacing stilled, his eyes shifting to mine rapidly, before slipping away and focusing on nothing. Pacing once again. "I want what you want. No frills attached, just getting a meaningless release."

Parroting my phrase from earlier - the kid was an awful liar. "Right. So you want to just screw around? A quick hand-job when we can manage it? Nothing more, no feelings, no romance, no meaning whatsoever?"

The veneer he had put up earlier was fading, visible in the way his shoulders hunched slightly as I hammered the point home.

"Yeah. That… that's what I want."

I nodded. "That way no one gets hurt, right? Jordan doesn't need to know, she does it often enough. Jack'll still have a Dad that loves him, and my partner will still have someone who loves her by her side, the only difference being I'm getting it out of my system without her having to know."

His steps slowed and his eyes met mine, surprise lining his gaze. "Yes, yeah, exactly. I want what you said, for those reasons exactly."

Frustration like lava tipped over the edge of my patience. "Damn it to hell, Newbie, I don't mean any of those things. We don't want the same things, because we're sure as hell doing them for different reasons!"

He blanched.

"But I don't want anyone to get hurt -"

"Well neither do I, you moron, but that doesn't mean they're my reasons for keeping it simple!"

Whatever colour he had in his cheeks faded quickly, leaving him pale, clearly dreading my next words and it was that, more than anything else he'd said or done that day that made me realise what was going on in his head, of the reasons behind his lying and false calm. A mixture of horror and annoyance flooded through me, making itself known through the weariness that took over.

I knew what I had to do.

"I'm not capable of having any more feelings for you, Joanna. I'm not capable because I already have those feelings for someone, and that someone I happen to have a child with. And not only am I not capable," I continued, frowning, knowing that what I was about to say would do the trick, "I don't want to feel anything for you. I do this because it's a quick and easy way to get a happy ending. You do a wonderful job, you truly do, but that's all it is."

His voice was so quiet that I could barely hear him. "That's all I want."

I snorted. "Sure it is. That's why you've been lying and trying to convince me to keep our little soirée going. And yes, your lies really are that transparent," I informed him - not that he needed telling. He didn't seem surprised. "So don't bother with it in future. It's entertaining, but gets a little annoying after a while."

Newbie's chin suddenly rose slightly - what was this, defiance? Determination? I brushed my finger over my nose and folded my arms, eyebrow raised as I waited to hear what he had to say. What he did say… well, somehow, it surprised me. Don't ask me how, but… it did.

"Look, the fact is that neither of us can read the other's mind. I can never truly know what you're thinking, just as you can't prove whatever you think I'm in this whole situation for, so… can we just agree to disagree and get on with it?" He stared at me, intense and unwavering. I didn't like it much; Newbie asserting any sort of power over me was annoying to say the least. "By that I mean, yeah, it's fine, let's be fuck-buddies and not aim for anything more. We'll keep it short, sweet and temporary. I'm fine with that," - he spread his hands out in front of him to drive the point home, "so long as you're fine with it."

I eyed him from across the room. He seemed serious enough, and there was a resolution beneath his tone that I couldn't quite understand, and that I knew I probably never would. I watched as he stepped towards me, hand out in front of him. It only shook a little bit as he asked, eyes focused on mine -

"Yes or no?"

An underlying thread of arrogance made its way to my ears from his voice. I didn't like that either. Did he think he was holding the power now? Was he honestly 'taking control of the situation'?

Like I'll play it your way, kid.

I didn't move. His hand pulled back slightly, before he forced it forward again, closer to me this time.

"Do you want to be fuck-buddies or not?" A bit of frustration now, and the tiniest hint of sarcasm. I laughed low under my breath; it was like watching a seven year old pretend to be a thirty year old. Amusing but ridiculous. I shook my head.

His hand fell to his side.

"No?"

JD POV

I had to admit, I knew I was getting a rise out of him, knew I was pissing him off a bit and I kind of liked it. I knew he held the cards, and, though I'd never truly let him know how I really felt - or was beginning to feel - for him, he held the very fragile strands of my happiness in his grasp, yet it was fun to pretend otherwise. Like it or not, I did sort of have some power in this. True, I wasn't exactly powerful but I had something. He wanted me enough that I had something.

But then he shook his head.

I repeated my confusion. "…no? You don't want me to be your fuck-buddy?"

"You sure have a lot of attitude today, Matilda."

I blinked. "That, err, doesn't answer -"

"I know it doesn't, I'm not stupid. Besides, you know the answer to that question already, but only so long as you play along with my rules."

I knew what they were. I'd already broken them, or was on my way to breaking them - not that he had to know that. "Right. Yeah. Well… so."

"So." He smirked.

"What now?"

"Well -" he looked at his watch. "You've had your fifteen minutes."

I nodded. It felt odd… even though we'd made it official - our little temporary physical situation - I still felt that something wasn't sorted. That there were things left unsaid.

Like maybe, 'Hey, Dr. Cox - just to let you know that there's a high chance that I might fall in love with you. Just a heads up.'

My stomach clenched just thinking about it.

"Newbie."

I focused my eyes, pulling myself out of my reverie only to find him standing close enough that I could easily touch him.

"Yeah, I… I should go then."

He chuckled. "That's not… quite what I had in mind."

"But you said I had fift-"

"If this is going to work, you need to learn when you shut your damned mouth."

With that, his lips covered mine.

X X X X X

The next three weeks flew by in a series of mind-blowing moments; they were all I lived for, our little sojourns in a supply closet, an on call room, the doctor's lounge, one very nerve-wracking but equally brilliant time in Dr. Kelso's office - it was all like a crazy dream that I hadn't woken up from yet, and I knew that this dream had a time limit to it. Every time I got paged somewhere, or found a text on my phone reading something along the lines of 'Five minutes in the doctor's lounge if you get there now' or even 'Rooftop. Now.' - it was insanity. Carla stopped bringing it up with me, either through sheer annoyance at the fact that I hadn't yet broken it off or because she felt I had the situation under control -

Yeah, I really didn't.

I tried in the first week to convince myself that my feelings were the same as his, that my missing him, my want and need of him was purely sexual. As he pinned me up against walls and threw me onto desks I forced myself to focus wholly on the sensations he brought about through touching me rather than taking notice of the way he looked at me, the words he spoke to me in-between the hotter and heavier moments. It would be fair to say that it almost worked, but in managing that I found I was missing something. Yes, the moments were unbelievably good and suffice it to say I'd never, ever been so physically aware of someone before - I'd discovered that him just looking at me in a certain way gave me an erection (not good when you're wearing scrubs that barely conceal anything) - but something felt wrong to me. Like when you need to crack your knuckles because they feel odd, or when you need to shake your legs to make something click back into place properly.

In the second week I decided to slowly introduce the idea of accepting my own feelings when we were doing things. I started out by just watching the way his eyes changed colour when he came towards me with that look, or how he could go from rough and fast movements to more gentle and slow. That was one of my favourite things, the way he did that; he'd be moving his hand over me so fast, so hard that I came so close to coming - but then without warning, he'd slow down, dragging it out, lightly brushing the tip of his thumb over me so that my knees would threaten to give way… but my favourite part of that?

The way he looked at me. His gaze become so focused, so intense when he slowed down, looking into my eyes, watching my pupils dilate, watching the way I reacted to his ministrations. I would always naturally close my eyes as he brought me right to the edge, but every time, every time he would murmur hoarsely,

"Look at me."

And I would. I'd force myself to open my eyes and focus on him as the moans turned far more guttural and impossible to quieten so that he would have the pleasure of knowing I was looking at him whilst he made me come, looking at him as I gave up the sexual struggle against his strong, talented hands - surrendering to him, I think he saw it as. I didn't just do it for him though. When I closed my eyes, it could be anyone doing those things to me but with them open I couldn't fail to identify the long, slow strokes on my aching erection as him. There was no mistake.

That was when everything started falling into place. The third week gave way to my feelings in a way I wasn't prepared for, truly forcing me to accept them - and the fact that I loved him. I still wasn't in love, as that wasn't a luxury I could afford whilst he was in love with someone else, but it was enough just to fall asleep at night knowing I had someone to love, that someone being the one person I'd wanted attention from at the very beginning - I'd just never in my weirdest and wildest dreams imagined I'd get attention from him in the way that I was. I'd never thought we'd be sex-buddies.

Course, it turned out that 'sex' was a variable word - it was the one thing that he didn't want to do which I, of course, didn't find out until the situation presented itself. We were lying on a bed in the on call room, our lips working away as our hands found themselves in other places, when suddenly he rolled so that I was on top of him. He ground his hips against mine, causing sensations that made my eyes roll into the back of my head - I tentatively did the same back, which led to him practically ripping off my scrubs trousers and pushing his own down. We moved against each other some more, before his sex-fuelled growl told me to take my lips down south. This wasn't something new, and it was something that I was apparently quite good at - at least, it never took longer than ten minutes for him to come whilst I was doing it, and considering how long he could go for sometimes I took this as a good thing.

After a few minutes he brought me back up to him, rolling me over onto my back and repaying the favour - some days I liked it and others I didn't, but that day was one of those where I couldn't help but love it. His big hands grasped my hips as he slid his tongue over me, his lips working magic - within about three minutes I was writhing underneath him, gasping, before I cried out the phrase -

"Fuck me!"

Instantly he had stopped, moving away and pulling up his underwear and scrubs trousers. For a few moments I assumed that I had been too loud and that he was preparing himself just in case someone decided to investigate - until he looked at me briefly.

"I hope that was just you getting carried away with your words, kid."

I was instantly confused. "What do you mean?"

His hands were deftly tying the top of his scrubs into a knot. "What you just uttered is something we're never going to be doing. You understand?"

I flushed red, remembering the embarrassingly loud 'fuck me'. Then I realised what he meant.

"You… don't want to have sex? As in, in the way that guys -"

"No need to go into detail, Yolanda, and yes, that is exactly what I mean. I don't do that. I don't want to do that with you."

I had understood; there was a definite hesitation and taboo about the idea of it, and even I in my emotional 'I want everything I can get from him' state wasn't sure I wanted that. "I get it."

He looked at me again. "I don't think you do, Newbie. The reason I don't want to do it is because, as a rule, I only have sex with people I intend to become serious with or am already serious with. You, of course, do not come under either of those categories."

I threw the barriers up instantly. "No, I know that. That's cool, I have fun with what we do anyway."

Dr. Cox nodded, a quick head movement that let me breathe a sigh of relief that he wasn't going to question whether I really meant that or not.

So. THAT was how I found out that we wouldn't be having sex.

I made my way home on the Saturday of the third week feeling slightly dreamy, only half-aware of the traffic around me, on auto-pilot up to the point where I reached my apartment, only truly coming back from whatever world I was lost in as I saw Carla rushing around the apartment, putting in earrings and quite frankly looking stunning in a deep red dress that made her curvy figure look -

"Dude, stop checking out my woman!" Turk came up behind me and slapped me on the back, hastily working out his tie as he too tried to get ready for an event I was unfamiliar with. Or was I…

"JD, hurry up and get ready, we're going to be late!"

Carla was slipping on some shoes as she barked her orders at me, making me feel panicky - but late for what? What had I forgotten?

"Dinner with Dr. Cox, Jordan, Elliot and Shaun?"

Damn, I'd completely forgotten! Carla's new obsession was going out with other couples, and I'd stupidly agreed to go despite being single. She'd taken pity on me, knowing I'd just be at home moping about being alone, and to placate her I'd agreed… damn, damn, damn!

"Y'know I don't really want -"

"GET DRESSED!"

Her tone left me no choice - I leapt towards the door of my bedroom, throwing my rucksack and coat to the floor and throwing open the chest of drawers. Dinner clothes, dinner clothes… Turk was wearing a shirt and tie, so wherever we were going was definitely not a place to wear something casual. Arrgh, why did I say yes?! It was going to be awkward as hell, and not only because I'd be surrounded by couples… the thought of seeing Dr. Cox and Jordan together made my stomach clench uncomfortably. Could I plead off with feeling ill?

I knew the answer to that. With a frustrated sigh, I took out a black shirt and a pair of my smarter black trousers, hesitating between a black tie and a deep green one -

"The green one Bambi, now get moving!"

ARRGH, the witch was in my head! I hastily de-scrubbed myself and hopped into the shirt and trousers, grabbing a pair of black shoes from underneath my bed and running out of my door. I cursed, leaping back to get my cell and being reprimanded with a screech that sounded something like 'WE'RE LEAVING NOW!" from the doorway of the apartment.

STRESS!!!!!!

By the time we'd got to the car, I was so tense from simply having to get ready that I'd completely forgotten the reason I didn't want to go.

Until my phone went off.

The Big C (19:48) See you in ten, Newbie.