It had almost been almost a week since Megatron had 'exiled Starscream forever'. Whenever this scenario had played out in the past, the Air Commander had either shown up within a few hours with enough stolen energon to allow him back, or would throw a temper tantrum, which would play out until Megatron decided that his SIC's antics could be used towards their cause, and Starscream would only receive a minor punishment. If they got lucky, the Autobots were up to something and they were able to sneak Starscream back into their habitation suite and the exile forgotten in the chaos.

But this time was different, because there was no sign of his other trine mate to be found. Thundercracker was beginning to worry about his absent older brother. He was starting to mentally make a list of possible scenarios when-

CRACK!

-Skywarp appeared next to him, thus interrupting his train of thought.

"Hey TC, have you seen Screamer around? He's not in any of his usual sulking spots, and he hasn't returned to the Nemesis either."

"He's not at the Cliffs of Insanity?" Skywarp shook his head. "Making faces at Mt. Rushmore?"

"We did that yesterday, but I checked again anyway. You know, I think that 'George' mech looks pretty good with a mustache"

Years of experience told Thundercracker not to ask for an explanation from his younger brother.

"I heard some rumors that a seeker was spotted urinating in the Grand Canyon yesterday. Maybe that was him"

"Uhm, no, that wasn't him" Skywarp said, suddenly interested in studying his feet.

Thundercracker raised an optic ridge at this.

"That might have sort of been me" Skywarp uttered sheepishly. Thundercracker did a face palm. "I'm sorry. I wouldn't have done it if I knew it would upset you".

Thundercracker sighed inwardly, thinking, 'Why me?'

Megatron then entered the room.

"Any sign of that idiot trine leader of yours yet?"

"Nothing yet, Lord Megatron. Skywarp and I were just about to go look for him, sir"

"We were?"

Thundercracker sharply elbowed Skywarp in the ribs.

"Ow! I mean, yes, we were" Skywarp responded, gently massaging the offended chest plates.

"Excellent. Report back to headquarters in three hours if you cannot find him. Now go"

"Yes sir!"

Once Skywarp and Thundercracker had flown a distance, Megatron then flipped a table. Literally.

"Staaaaarscreeeaaaam!" Megatron roared. "You son of a glitch! When you're here, no one can live with you, and when you're gone, no one can function properly without you! Arghhhhhhh!"

Megatron was about to throw a chair, the one that was at the table he flipped, at the door when Soundwave entered.

"Soundwave," Megatron put the chair down and sat on it in an effort to calm down. "Report. Did Lazerbeak find any information about Starscream's location?"

"Negative" Soundwave replied in a flat voice. He looked at the broken table on the other side of the room, then back to Megatron. "Observation: obsession with Starscream, growing out of hand"

"That's ridiculous. I am not obsessed with that idiot of an air commander. It's just- ahh- too quiet around the base without him begging for me to spare his life. Yes, that's it, it's too quiet. Bad for moral" Megatron said in what he hoped was casual. "There is also more I have to do now that is usually done by Starscream. You are dismissed"

He then turned to the monitor and began pretending to fill out paper work. Soundwave shook his head, but left without further comment. The relationship between the first and second in command was too confusing for even his advanced logic circuits to figure out. They weren't lovers- both had made that painfully clear the first time it was suggested. No one has been brave- or stupid- enough to bring it up again. They weren't brothers. They weren't parent and child. All anyone knew was that they were the top two bots in charge. No one even knew how they met, not even those who had been with the Decepticons from the very beginning.

It was even more confusing than the seeker's relationship with his trine mates, not that he was in any hurry to figure out that puzzle, either. They probably knew, but they kept giving different and increasingly more improbable stories whenever asked. Besides, he had cassetteicons that were demanding his attention through the bond they shared anyway.

Back at the ARK

"Me Snarl miss Swoop"

"Me Grimlock no miss him Swoop!"

"Me Slag miss him Swoop too"

"Me Sludge miss him too, too"

"No! Him Swoop no big like us big Dinobots! Him no strong like us strong Dinobots! Him no stomp and smash like us stomp and smash Dinobots! Him no come back ever, ever, ever. Hmpf."

Grimlock turned around and was about to leave, when Snarl spoke up.

"But Swoop ohana"

Then Slag chimed in.

"You Grimlock remember ohana, right?"

"Me Sludge think him Grimlock no remembering it anymore"

Grimlock stopped, but didn't turn around.

"Me Grimlock remember. Little Hawaii girl and blue dog teach us that. It mean no bot get left behind"

"or?"

"Or forgotten" Grimlock turned around. "But us no know where him Swoop went. How us Dinobots find him?"

"Us go ask Wheeljack and Ratchet! Them always know what to do"

"Ratchet! Stop! They're our children! That means no hitting them with wrenches"

"Let go of me! They messed with our baby, Wheeljack, now I need to mess with them!"

"But they're your babies, too"

"No one asked you Ironhide!"

Wheeljack and Ironhide were trying to restrain the enraged medic from attacking the four Dinobots when Optimus Prime walked into the room.

"What in the name of Primus is going on in here?"

"Those Pit spawns insulted my little Swoop and they must pay!" Ratchet seethed in such a way that even Ironhide looked nervous.

"Me Grimlock say me sorry! Me Grimlock thought him Swoop come back home, but me no know where he go! Me Grimlock want Dinobot's little Swoop back NOW!"

"Everyone calm down!" Optimus roared, surprising those present into a stunned silence. "Now, Grimlock, why don't you tell me what happened…"