A/N - Umm...wut a new chapter already?
Well ok then!
DISCLAIMER - I do not own Naruto
The girl sat there, mind twirling as she took in what her grandmother had said. The information that she had just received was startling, no not startling, heart breaking. With a gasp, she felt the searing in her chest, and even as she composed herself, she couldn't force herself to pretend the hot iron pain wasn't there.
The grandmother looked off to the distance, her eyes shaded and gray. As she sat quietly, she listened to her granddaughters reaction to what she had said, and with her own feelings of pain as well, she frowned and whispered, "Do you understand now why the ones from the past chose to keep this to themselves. Do you see what scares us all? It is a common fear we all have, but to be told the truth is ten times worse."
Sakura swallowed, heart pounding as she continued to gasp. Her eyes began to sting as she choked out, hardly able to sting her sentence together, "But why. Do we know why? Is there some way to fix it? To keep it from happening?"
The question forced a bitter smile on the grandmothers lips, and as she turned to her granddaughter, she admitted something she had never even admitted to herself, "This blessing is most likely a curse, Sakura, but you can take it as you like. Few see this an opportunity to continue trying, but I see it as a trap that snaps before you are even granted the privlage to move. It is your own decision on what to do now, it is a path you can choose to take or not."
Sakura's eyes fell to the ground as tears slipped and landed on her hands. She watched them as they shook, and she accepted that the pain that was pulsing through here wouldn't stop any time soon.
The grandmother cried as well as she spoke softly, "But either way, for centuries, we have failed. And failure is the price to pay for the blessing to continue."
X
I took uneasy strides as I kept pace with the tall man beside me, his white and dark blue suit making his raven colored hair look striking within the sun. As his bangs swayed loosely, forcing a false pretense of easy going throughout his whole aura, I took noticed of how the birds- who had just been chirping happily- grew eerily quiet as we walked past towards the back yard.
My stomach twisted and knotted as I remained quiet, obediently following this man to behind the mansion, confused as to why we weren't heading to the limo as I thought we would. I hadn't dared ask, the courage lost within me when Anna gave me my warning to be cautious. Instead I silently kept my questions within my head, helping me easy the nervous jitters I acquired as I focused on how my thoughts floated throughout my mind, clouding the true fear that wanted to set within my bones.
Sasuke hadn't done anything wrong as of yet. If anything he had been as charming as the first, second, and third time we met. He greeted me with a warm smile that I couldn't shake the feeling was completely fake and staged. As we walked out of the mansion, he held the door, bowing his head respectfully as I mumbled my thank you. And even as we made our way to our destination now, he glanced back at me with a radiant smile every so often, checking if I was alright.
This sensation that I was feeling, I have only felt it once before. When Sasuke had kissed my hand on our first date, the shivering kept with me all that day. I never figured out why, and I hadn't bothered to wonder after it left because I was beyond relieved when it did; But as I walk with him now, the feeling is 10 times worse than what it was, I can't help but ponder if Sakura is part of the reason.
My mind, in the depths of its thoughts and darkness, has been tinkering with the idea that Sakura was the cause of a lot of things. But mostly, I have questioned the words I…somewhat was sure I heard last night. It was whispered, dark, filled with sorrow and regret as she took me, and I believed I cried as I heard her speak them. To breach it with thought stung my heart, seared it with unimaginable pain so I have avoided putting it in the forefront of my mind.
But it was there. Her words were there. And I couldn't help wondering what they meant, what sorcery they seemed to hold.
Maybe this once, we will succeed.
My chest stung as I inhaled a breath, biting the inside of my cheek to keep the pain at bay. Those words, they held so much emotion within them that even thinking about them stung my eyes. I was hurt, hurt that she was right and we were possibly doomed for failure; Hurt that we were left at the feet of mercy and hope to keep us together.
But with the waves of hurt came the cracking thunder of confusion. Why did I feel like I was reliving a horror that I continuously was set up for over and over again? Why did I feel as if I have already experienced this failure before, and to do it once more would probably shred the already small piece of foreign soul that lingered within my very being? I couldn't understand how I felt as if I was treading dangerous waters, and one more false move would shatter me completely; because I couldn't take one more failure, I couldn't stand another loveless life.
The raging emotions were obviously clear, but even as clear as they were I was still confused. But, the only thing I was certain of was a single statement.
It felt like the romance me and Sakura held for each other is one of a distant, dark, lonely past that struggled to attempt itself over and over again. Repeating until it was right, and repeating until it was continuously right.
Sakura, my mind whispered out to her, feeling almost certain that she could hear me, Sakura what have you gotten us into… What have you done?
My heart thudded as I looked to the sky, confused, lost, and scared. I shook, wishing there was someone stable who could hold me up as I became flush and started to feel faint. What was happening between us was a disaster, but if it had to die in a smoldering fire I would much rather stand next to Sakura in that very fire, than with the man I was with currently.
And that is why I was truly nervous, truly scared. I was with a man that was not Sakura, and so I couldn't depend on him to catch me if I fell.
"Ino, my lovely queen, please take a seat at the picnic we have prepared just for you."
The emotions of faint were gone. No, with a surge so quick and striking that I couldn't even begin to pin point the origin, a feeling of rage swam through my very essences. I felt like baring my teeth to Sasuke just then, hissing out my dislike with glaring eyes and evident body language.
I wished to snap his neck for calling me a name that Sakura had only hours ago whispered into my ear. Queen? I am no queen of his.
"You may call me Ino," I bit out, attempting to be respectful as we reached a luxurious white tent with open walls. Under it sat a table set that had equally white cloth draped on it. The scene that they had chosen was right under a tree, adding to the shade that was already given. Unimpressed, I made my way to my seat.
"Oh my," Sasuke chuckled as he pulled my chair, offering the seat to me with a small bow of his head, "If I were a foolish man, I would think I have touched a certain nerve."
My heart hammered as I sat down on my chair and felt him slide me into it comfortably. I did not like how easily I was read by him, how effortlessly he could tell my intentions and feelings. Making sure he was unable to see my frown, I replied, "No. I feel it is more intimate to be called by my name rather than by a random replacement that is thrown around so….loosely."
Sasuke made his way around the table, slipping into his own chair with smooth movements. As he adjusted into his seat, pulling it closer to the table, he leaned back into his chair and gave me a knowing smile. Amused, he watched me carefully, "You certainly know how to cover up quickly, don't you?"
Feeling it pointless to pretend at this point, I gave him a smile that felt like it was ripping my face to shreds. Replying in the most pleasant tone as I could, but not bothering to remove the venom, I said, "As a lady of the Uzumaki house hold, I would say I acquired the skill after countless dinner parties."
His smile widened, leaning forward as he pointed his finger at me with a wag and a laugh, "And clever. Very clever. I must have missed these sides of you on our first date. How though, I'm not sure- Unless…something has changed between then and now."
Attempting to converse with this man was like playing a game of chess. And as he led the board, moving his pieces so nonchalantly in offensive positions, I moved mine as well; dancing around each strategy he attempted to take with me. He was poking, probing to find my weak points, strong points, and ticks. Little did he take account to the fact that I was my grandmother's very blood: and that woman had one to none weakness.
I bowed my head as I thanked the waiter for pouring me some wine. Taking it up with a sip, I swirled the contents within my cup and smiled at Sasuke, "Maybe I am just more comfortable with you now, more than back then."
"It seems to me, though, that you have nothing to fear." Sasuke replied, taking a sip of wine as well, "You speak to me in such a way of…common company, as if I am not the very man attempting to win your heart."
"And it seems to me that you are attempting to read something so far deep between the lines that you are losing the common company we are holding." When he blinked, slightly caught off guard, I threw him another smile and attacked again, "Tell me, Sasuke, besides the heart of mine you hope to win, why are you here on my property today?"
His eyes darkened, I could tell even in the shade. He bit me a tense smile as he leaned back, "Simply to treat you to breakfast."
"On my own estate?" I ask, not skipping a beat and pressing my advantage, "Seems rather odd that you wouldn't show me the wonders of your estate instead."
"I hoped not to drag you about so early," He countered, steading himself as he tried to gain back his ground.
"Then you hope not to impress."
Silence cracked down between us like heavy thunder. I leaned back, placing my drink down with mild interest as he stared at me, the fire in his eyes betraying his portrayed calm mood. I could feel the fumes from here as he sat there across the table, both of us knowing that he had lost round one. My eyes tightened slightly as his jaw shifted and set sternly. Then with a clear of his throat, he admitted his defeat, "Well, the reason I linger about today is in hopes to catch your brother."
I slipped my finger across my cheek, watching him like a hawk watched its squirming prey, "Did you wish to speak to him about some business?"
"Well yes of course," Sasuke replied as he took a sip of his wine, trying to give me a smile that was much more smooth and steady then the one that sat upon his face, "What else do CEO's speak of?"
Feeling slightly upset that he hadn't set the stage for round two, I attacked, "Was this business about me?"
He narrowed his eyes at me when he heard the question. Then, with a smirk and a shake of his head, he chuckled and leaned back within his chair, "I swear you truly are as deadly and clever as predicated. Your grandmother must have been a shark herself."
"Those were often the words to describe her," I nodded, but refusing to get off track, "So do you admit it, you were here to talk about me?"
With a sigh, he pushed his silverware to a more comfortable position, "As a matter of fact, not particularly. I came to offer him something for his… continued support with my company."
"Support," I mumbled out, slightly confused. And just with that slight stumble, I found myself being thrust in round two unprepared and defenseless. With a knowing smile tossed at me, I listened helplessly as Sasuke spoke, "Yes, support. You see my company has come across a rather large rough patch. Naruto was kind enough to lend us a hand."
I blinked, completely surprised. All this time I assumed Naruto was off arranging some secret wedding for me and this man, but instead he was lending his help with another company. This wasn't good, I was not prepared to hear this information.
Sasuke, being the student of the snake that he is, took this time to strike repeatedly and relentlessly, "For some odd reason, something in our systems went completely haywire. So as we sat upon our tower, thinking we had 6 million above our average budget for the month, a glitch fixes itself after we have spent the extra cash and showed we were actually below what we were supposed to have for that month. You can only imagine the chaos. Here we thought we put 6 million extra into an investment that would prove a wealthy one in the future, and then the next moment we notice that we not only lack cushion money, but we are also below our stability as a company."
I swallowed, stumbling out so I could gain more ground, "So Naruto helped in what way?"
"He gave us a 7 million dollar investment, one that we will double and pay back over the course of a few months. Truly a savior, that man is. I haven't been able to thank him enough." Sasuke then shifted within his seat, leaning his head upon his fingers as he watched me squirm. An ever so slight smile lifted upon his lips.
"Well you can imagine my confusion," I said slowly as I attempted not to grumble out my defeat, "with the stress of find a company to partner with, I thought my brother was planning to make all the decisions by himself."
"I'm sure you have a reason to think so," Sasuke replied, letting his eyes drift away with a smug expression, "The late nights over at my company must have been a tad worrying. But I assure you, it was me personally who brought him home safely."
I sighed, feeling completely broken and without resolve after losing such a quick round. I let my eyes wander as well, watching at the birds hopped on a nearby branch. A single bird took notice to me, and with a twitch of his head to the side as he showed his curiosity, he stared at me as I stared at him. He blinked, and with his blink came the realization that the birds had continued to refuse to sing.
I slid my eyes back to Sasuke, and again my mind began to twirl with questions. But the first question that came to mind, the one that overwhelmed my very curiosity, slipped my lips without thought, "What is the relationship between your company and the Haruno's."
The question caught him off guard. I could tell by the way he raised his head quickly to the inquiry, his eyes locking on mine instantly. The connection seemed to unsettle him. He attempted to look away, but he couldn't. The smooth easy aura he always seemed to give off faded ten shades. Becoming rigid, almost like wet stone, he turned within his seat and practically broke his neck as he turned his gaze away from mine.
"The company of Sakura Haruno is nothing to brag about. It is below us in every single category in every stature that makes a business successful. Yet. Throughout our history, we seem to always compete for the same thing and…our company always loses."
My head jerked back, surprised he answered so truthfully. Then, as I processed what he said, I became even more surprised at his statement, "You lose to a company below you? How?"
"Logically speaking, Ino, a company of my built should never lose anything. With a light as bright as ours, we are practically all but promised forever in every investment. My company is a business giant, a complete shadowing tower for all those below us. Yet," his eyes turned back to me, and without the smirk, the easy fake smile, and the know it all expression, he looked deep within mine and showed me a part of him that I so recently felt was never there: Compassion. Compassion for a past that all but killed everything he used to be, "we lose. Contiously. Over and over again to them."
I watched his gaze, feeling uneasy. The Sasuke I was witnessing wasn't as easy to hate as the one I was so familiar with. This one seemed sensitive- raw- like everything I was seeing was exposed without the shell. His sentence voiced actual sorrow of the truth he spoke to me. He seemed hurt, wounded. My heart within my chest began to thump strongly as I watched him, feeling pity and regret for whatever he had to deal with in his past. In a soft whisper, I asked as gently as I could, "What have you lost to them?"
"Countless of things I can't admit," His eyes fell to the table and he stared at his fingers that barely gripped the edge, "But it seems…no. It feels as if this has been going on for lifetimes upon lifetimes, my company and her's. I should take the time to ask Orchimaru the true details of our companies."
And just then, a shiver ran through my spine. The hammering of my heart, it sped up faster as Sasuke looked back up at me, rawness and compassion gone. Instead his eyes were locked again, and the only word to describe them was steel. He glared hard, his words as cold as his eyes as he spoke, "But I refuse to lose anymore. We will come on top."
The dots… the dots were connecting. And that's when I knew that- along with the confusions and facts of the feelings I felt about Sakura- Sasuke… he had to have had the same confusing feelings too.
X
The breakfast had ended as soon as we finished eating. We didn't spend time lingering afterwards. Instead, we both excused ourselves and politely said our goodbyes. It was humoring that only an hour before we had come as two beings playing a game of metaphorical chess to become logically superior for the day, but in the end leave each other with short mumbles and confused minds.
I walked quickly through the mansion, hoping to reach my room before anyone stopped me. There was something that was tugging at the back of my mind, something that felt urgent. I needed to research something, to find evidence.
Of what?... What did I wish to find information on?...
My thoughts, they were two crowded as questions filled my mind. I couldn't think properly, and it was probably because I felt jittery and on edge. Instead only strong feelings were surging me forward, helping me find my way.
As I sped past a hallway, something caught my left eye in the very corner of my vision. With a small moment of curious interest, I looked over to see two people standing, speaking quickly to each other. I couldn't recognize who they were fast enough, because the very moment I turned my head I had already passed the hall, but with a quick stop at the corner I held my breath and listened to the voices.
"Damn it, Anna, don't you think I have this under control." A deep voice snapped, irritation evident as his voice carried down the hall, "You don't have to keep telling me."
"No, I don't think you have it under control!" Anna bit back, almost growling as she tried to speak sense, "Everyone around you is telling you that you are making a mistake, yet you continue to skip around and do what you want."
"Everything isn't as it appears," The voice, I recognized it as my brothers, replied, "Just because it seems like I am doing nonsense, doesn't mean that I am. As a company, we need this."
"Don't meet with him, Naruto," It was the first time I had heard Anna truly breach a tone of begging, "Don't do this. The man is a shark. To love for the rest of his life is not what he came to pursue."
"And neither has any of the companies," Naruto reminded grimly, "So if I have to deal with men who truly aren't going to love Ino, and who Ino is truly not going to love back, I need to do it with the best options in mind."
"You idiot," Anna cried out, a heel stomping on the ground as she practically screeched, "Do you truly believe that Ino will understand your actions? You plan to place a lifelong burden on her, and you think it will have no effects on you both, only bring more good to the company. Ino is still a child, still growing. To place something like that, a loveless life, a shame of a marriage, on her would destroy her completely. She cannot handle such a responsibility, Naruto. She simply cannot. If you truly need marriage to merge two companies, why don't you marry off instead?!"
There was a silence, a heavy one. Even from down the hall and around the corner I could feel the tension between them. As I held my breath, waiting to hear what would happen next, I nervously wondered if I should walk away now before I got caught.
"Me marry off?" The question slammed to the ground as he spoke in soft rumbling anger, "Me? Is that truly what you wish? For some other woman to dance about, hanging from my arm with a smile and luscious perfume teasing my very senses?"
I listened, but I didn't fully comprehend his sentence until full 5 seconds after it was said. With a sink of my heart, I realized what was happening. If I have ever suggested something like that to Sakura, I was sure she would reply in the same deadly tone and angrily demand if I were truly serious as well. My shock almost made me stumble to the ground.
Naruto and Anna; There was something spiraling between them. It was a relationship; Forbidden and deep-rooted as a spring tree surviving in late winter.
My breath quickened as I heard Anna reply, "Better you truly understand the basses of love and act appropriately than to sit here and allow you to think that Ino does not have such feelings for another of her choice. This marrying off thing may very well be a tradition in all companies, Naruto Uzumaki, but who demanded it be done insensitively and harsh."
"Anna you don't understand. Our company is reaching a point of-"
"Then I choose to continue to not understand," Anna interrupted, a shake in her tone even though she was speaking furiously, "Make a decision you will regret, Naruto, and see how many others will choose to not understand your plea and case when it is all said and done. Me, I will certainly be one of them."
And with that, I heard heels move against the ground and down the hall, growing more distant. I stood there, chewing at my lip as I turned to lean against the wall, shocked to all I just heard. After a moment, a sigh slipped from down the hall, and seconds afterwards, I heard a hard slamming thump against the wall as my brother shouted out a noise of frustration.
"Damnit!" He cursed loudly before storming down the hall as well, his footsteps speeding into the same distance.
"Christ," I mumbled before forcing myself to move, my thoughts even more jumbled then before, "when the hell did living here get so complicated all of the sudden?"
X
I had been deep within the internet, fingers typing away at the keyboard. My mind, well it was a numbing blob of a mess as I sped, using only questions to guide me and no other form of thinking. I was feverish as I researched, hoping to find a glimpse of the information I need. But it was impossible to start getting my questions answered if I couldn't find my original company an any file kept under our database or any review/description on the internet.
But my company wasn't all that I was searching for. You could say that I was multitasking between each category, which in a basic layout there were three. I was searching for the past of my company, Sasuke's company, and Sakura's company. Within the depths of confusion and madness of the present, I had a strong feeling that we were all connected by a single strand to thin and short to be noticed but by those who dealt with it personally in the past.
So, if dealing with it personally is the only way to notice it, than I took the past events of the current month as something that I was almost certain had to be the only connection. The tradition of marrying off to another company was a deep and old one, so with a spark of thought I questioned myself; It had to have happened more than once between our companies.
I chewed my lip as I leaned back in my chair, looking down as my fingers traced over the keys. As the tips of my finger traced over the M, I let my mind wander to the possibilities. But before I could scratch the surface of it all, a heard my window slide open quietly.
I turned around and blinked, but was not completely surprised, when I saw Sakura climbing in. She stepped down and straightened, glancing around but stopping when her eyes found me. Giving me a small smile, she greeted, "Hello."
"Hey," I croaked, mixed emotions passing through me. I simply turned back around to my computer as she carefully moved to close the window and curtains. Minimizing the material that was on the screen, I pushed back my chair from my desk and got up.
I went to turn, but Sakura was already behind me. Her arms wrapped around my waists from behind, pulling me back into her chest. As I felt the warmth spread throughout my body, her breath tickled the back of my neck. She let in an audible breath, sighing out as she nuzzled into the side of my neck and whispered right in my ear, "You would not believe how hard it was to wait until the depths of night to visit you. All day you have been toying with my mind. My devilish jealousy presumed you ran away with this man, never to return."
Though I was stressed, exhausted, and had no energy to take another step, a smile slipped my lips at her words. Biting my lip softly, I took my hands and ran them across her arms, my palms sliding across them until I crossed my arms and held her comfortingly, "Your devilish jealousy must think extremely too much."
"I would have to admit that it does," she whispered back, her gentle breath within my ear causing me to shiver. My fingers twitched against her skin as she nipped at the sensitive spot of my ear, carefully avoiding any tugging as she leaned more into me, "it has such an imagination that it could destroy a woman if she was not strong enough."
I took in deep breaths, my mind already fogging. I intended to keep my ground tonight; I was tired of melting around her so easily. Tonight I wanted her to shiver, for her to stumble. Smiling ever so softly, I murmured back to her, "Only strength keeps you afloat? What of the faith? Does it not exist?"
"The faith?" She mocked, pulling me even more and pressing me flush into her body, "The faith keeps me from demanding where you have been all day."
"A question I am not required to answer," I replied smoothly, and almost let out a small laugh as I felt her tense against me. Bringing my hand up, I slipped it across Sakura's hair before falling it to her neck. Gripping it carefully, I turned my head and pulled her to look at me. The movement caused her to turn, her firm grip- which had planted her right behind me- loosened as she adjusted to be more on the left side than on the right.
She searched my eyes steadily, her resolve stronger than I thought it would be. After a moment, she replied, "And nor should you. It's disrespectful of me to assume otherwise."
I watched her as the seconds passed, and with a gentle smile I realized how easy it was to shift power between us. Turning myself within her grasp to face her properly, I wrapped my arm loosely around her neck as the other propped itself on her shoulder, my fingers tangled within her hair. As I scratched her scalp soothingly, I mumbled, "Do you believe me to be a fool? Am I supposed to simply believe you have the utmost faith in me?"
Her eyes leveled with mine, and as she stared deep within them, she answered unblinkingly, "No, Ino. I do not believe you will simply take my word. I am willing to prove such faith, however, if that is what you wish."
She was causing my pulse to quicken. I never imagined that being in the power position would be as stumbling and foggy as being the underling. Though being the dominate did had its unique feeling. I had an urge, an urge I 've never felt before, to demand a variety of things from Sakura… and I expected it to be given to me, "Am I truly your queen?"
"My lady," Sakura whispered , her expression growing intense, "You are the only thing I believe truth, freedom, and beauty represents. Queen? You are my undying love, my mate and love to be, and I shall spiral into this weakness I have for you forever and always."
My smile was light and did not betray the butterflies in my chest that I felt. Heart thumping in solid rhythm, I questioned, "Prove it to me, then. Show me you only care for me and that you trust I only care for you."
With quick fluid motions, I was lifted from the ground and was straddling Sakura's waist as she stood, moving towards the bed that was merely steps away. Placed down carefully, she climbed and hovered over me, the intensity in her eyes causing them to look dark and fogged over. She leaned down and bit my down my jaw line, a low rumble heard from the back of her throat. And as she moved my wrists to above my head, pinning them down against the bed, she breathed into my ear heavily, "It would be my genuine pleasure to show you how trapped I am within you."
X
The crickets sang as I laid on Sakura's chest, my fingers twirling around her belly button as I was curled and watching it. A hum danced around the room as I song with the crickets, my steady rhythm being Sakura's heartbeat. She rubbed my shoulder as we laid there, the moments of silence tumbling on and on and on. Her breath was as steady as mind as she stared at the ceiling, and it had kept this way for a while.
A few more minutes passed of nothing, but Sakura was the first to break the silence, "You honestly played me right into your hands tonight, didn't you?"
I smiled slightly against her skin as I closed my eyes, "Possibly."
"How incredibly hot," she mumbled back, I laughed as she continued, "Demanding I show my love in such a way; having such a cool collected composure as I enjoyed and pleased every inch of your body. Even thinking of it after the fact, I wish to prove it to you again and again."
My smile grew as I opened my eyes and continued to twist my fingertip against her skin, "So you are ok with the shift of power occasionally?"
"My lady, I can't say I have a choice if this continues in the future," she moved her hand to run her fingers through my hair, "I do not believe I see an outcome that doesn't leave me pinning you down and claiming my love in your ear as I take you as mine."
I blushed at her words and squirmed slightly, "Good. I do not always plan to be the helpless one that you can manipulate."
"And I am happy to hear that," Sakura chuckled in reply. Seconds passed as silenced claimed us again. But it only took seconds more until Sakura spoke again, "So as I was coming in you were on the computer. Is there something you were searching for?"
I hadn't completely forgot about my feverish study, but it certainly became the last thing on my mind. As Sakura brought it up, mountains upon mountains of feelings, thoughts, and questions flooded my mind again. Shifting against Sakura's chest, my finger twirling came to the slow stop, "I was searching my old company again, along with other things… It's all to confusing for me to understand without research."
"What is all too confusing?" Sakura shifted also, and I knew she was staring down at me now.
With a sigh, I chewed my lip as I attempted to answer her in a way that made sense, "There has been… a lot that I have not been able to understand. Some, if not most… deals with you and me."
She tensed; I felt it under me as her fingers came to a halt as well. The pace of her heart changed as she asked calmly, "Care to explain?"
My heart began to pick up pace as well. Curling more into her, afraid to look up to her face, I whispered against her skin the fear I kept pushing away, "Last night, while we were…making love, you said something to me; something I find to make me uneasy every time I breach the subject within my mind."
Her hand fell to my shoulder as her fingers lightly gripped it. She was steeling herself as she attempted to remain calm, but I heard the skipped beat of her heart, "What did I say, my love?"
I gnawed at the inside of my cheek, suddenly becoming nervous. Then with a stutter in my speech, I attempted to rush it out loud, "You said- You said maybe this time we will succeed." Her fingers tightened in a painful way. I shut my eyes tightly, I forced myself to continue, "Ever since I have had this uneasy feeling that we are bound to fail and I'm not sure why. And then I have this deep unbearable sensation that if we fail again, I will not be able to stand it." I opened my eyes, my words stumbling out faster as I released my fears, "And it scares me to feel this way, more because I wish for you to stay with me forever, but also I feel as if these feelings are somehow not mine. We have never met before Sakura, I have only just met you, yet I have these emotions and I don't know why."
I stopped, but only to squeak out, "Sakura, you are hurting me."
Her hand jerked away from me, and as I quickly rose from her chest to look at her face, she pulled away and turned her head before I could see her face. For some reason the action hurt, and as she sat up and moved out of bed, I attempted to catch a glimpse of her face as I continued, "Sakura please, tell me what is happening. I feel as if you know, like you have known for a while, and I am only scared and wish comfort. I don't hate you, I just wish for you to hold me and tell me that all of this isn't in my mind- that I'm not losing it and turning crazy. Please, tell me something."
She cursed to herself as she snatched her pants from the ground, shoving her legs through as she continued to avoid me even as I scrambled to the edge of the bed to see her face. My eyes stung as I desperately pleaded, "Please, Sakura. What is happening?"
"I am such an idiot," she snapped, and I didn't know whether it was for me to hear or not, "Such a complete fool. How could I have fucked up so much? "
When she continued to have conversation only with herself as she put on her bra and shirt, tears slipped down my face as I sobbed out desperately, "You haven't fucked up! I am just scared and lost and want you to help me!"
The sudden burst of tears caused Sakura to whirl around. As she saw me crying, she looked horrified. She moved to rush to me, most likely to gather me in her arms and comfort me, but she stopped herself. Instead, her out reached hand that moved from pure reaction, turned into a shaking fist as she turned her back on me again.
My heart broke.
She gathered her shoes and before I could say anything, she tossed them out the window. Tears were blurring my vision, so I was quickly whipping them away to be able to see. I tried to keep the audible sobs at bay as I attempted to speak. My stuttering was server, and I couldn't take in enough breaths to say a long sentence. So, with all the strength I could muster, I whimpered out, "Please don't leave me…"
Sakura paused her movements, growing rigid at my sentence. Her hands gripped the window so hard that I heard the wood wheeze under the stress. She was fighting with herself, I could tell, and just as I thought she would turn around and give me what I just pathetically begged for.
She climbed out the window and left me there.(1)
(1) - Hardest thing to force myself to write D:
Uh... do you guys get the flashback? If not maybe I will explain more in the next chapter.
Ok, well here's a random realllllllllly early update. I updated like, wut, three days ago? Maybe 4? Well, to be honest I already knew what I kinda wanted to write for the next chapter anyway, and with all the reviews that keep flowing in, it kind of motivated me to go ahead and get it done.
Am I suggesting anything? [: omg of course not.
But there is a review box right there. Just saying *casual shrug*
... REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! DO ITTTTTT
*clears throat and gains back composure*
Shycadet loves. Out.