Story: When Everything Changed

Summary: Something inside begins to protest her actions causing Bellatrix to question herself and those around her. How will her world as she knows it be affected? BL/HG

Rated: M

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns everything. I am merely borrowing the characters to play my own little game with them.

A/N 1: Italics are a flashback. Also ** before a new paragraph after a break indicates a scene change. While xx means skipping further into that scene. I just wanted to clarify. Please let me know if these symbols aren't showing up.

A/N 2: Though I have edited this more than once I am sure there are still mistakes. This is unbetaed and all mistakes are mine.

A/N 3: Not the original. Revised and Reposted.
_

Hermione's POV

"Do you miss him?"

"Who?" Bella asks. Her dark eyes are locked with mine. I long to reach out and caress her cheek; to hold her and kiss her. After my conversation with Professor McGonagall I can no longer deny my growing attraction to Bellatrix. However, no matter how much I want to express this attraction I have to remember that the feeling are not mutual. Also there is still the small detail that I am in a relationship with Ron.

"Rodulphus." Her husband.

She opens her mouth and tries to speak, but no words come out so she closes it again. I watch as her eyes become distant and the emotions of memories wash across her face. When she is still lost in thought after a few minutes I take her hand in mine.

Bella subtly shakes her head and quietly says, "No, no I don't." Relief washes over me and I push it away. This changes nothing, yet somewhere in the back of my mind a little voice says, yes it does. I should be curious why Bellatrix reacted the way she did, and I am, but my curiosity is being overridden by other emotions. "Hermione?"

"Hmmm," I return my eyes to Bella, but I am forced to look away from her. She is so breathtaking, and my urge to kiss her is overwhelming.

"You all right?"

"Yeah, fine." I don't have to look at her to know that she is not satisfied with my answer.

I smile as Teddy crawls toward us on the floor. I know the only reason Tonks was willing to leave is because I am here. Her distrust for Bellatrix is obvious and she doesn't bother to hide it. This does not seem to bother Bella though. I know that she believes that she should be treated horribly and that thought breaks my heart.

What has happened to Bellatrix that molded her into the person she is today? "Why don't you miss him?" My voice comes out in barely more than a whisper.

I observe as she debates with herself. Seeming lost and confused. Shakily I raise my hand to her face wanting to comfort her, wanting to bring her back to the present. When my hand makes contact with her soft skin she yanks back pulling away from me completely.

I fold my arms over my chest and look down knowing that I've crossed the line. Teddy is at my feet playing with my pant leg. He looks up at me with big ever changing eyes and a smile on his face. I can't help but beam at his one toothed grin and hair that constantly changes color. He is too cute. I pick him up and bounce him up and down in my lap so he will stay still.

I glance at Bellatrix. She is watching me closely with guilt on her face.

The front door opens and shuts. Bags crinkle in the kitchen and I know Tonks is home. I can leave. Standing up I exit the room without looking at Bella.

When I reach the kitchen I pass Teddy to Tonks. With a quick look at me her face becomes worried. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I reply quietly. Her eyes flicker toward the hallway suspicion within them. As I make my way toward the door I catch a glimpse of Bellatrix's reflection in the window. She is leaning against the wall in the hallway just out of sight of Tonks. Sadness and regret are flashing through her eyes, but I ignore it and leave the house before my mind persuades me to go back and comfort her.

**
Ron holds the door to the pub open for me. I thank him then follow him to the bar where he finds us two free seats at the end. For once I am grateful I am old enough to drink because I need it. Ron orders us two fire whiskeys. He takes my hand and I focus my attention on him. "I'm glad you agreed to go out tonight. You've been so distant lately I have been worried." Guilt floods me. I've been so wrapped up in Bella, finding a job, and life that I have neglected Ron.

"I've just had a lot on my mind." I can't remember the last time Ron and I have sat down alone together and talked. The only time I've really seen him is in bed, and most of the time he's already asleep before I slip into the room.

The bartender brings us our drinks and we sit in silence. The liquid burns my throat and reminds me why I rarely drink.

"Do you want to dance?" I shrug and follow him onto the dance floor.

After one song I am ready to return to my drink. Ron spent the whole time rubbing against me. I could feel him getting turned on and I tried to act like I was too, but I couldn't.

I return to my seat and order another drink as Ron sits next to me. I look at him. I gaze into his eyes and feel nothing.

A drink is placed in front of me and I stare into it as I pick at the coaster beneath it. Suddenly Bella smiling and laughing floods my vision. The edges of my lips curl. The image transforms to the loving expression on Bella's face the first time she held Teddy. I can see the concern in her eyes when I took a huge chunk out of my arm after splinching. I can detect a ghost pressure of her hand in mine and her arms around me.

I look up at Ron, and realize I have to end this. It has less to do with Bellatrix and more to do with the fact that our relationship is not healthy and never has been. I have been prolonging it because he is my best friend, but in the process I've been hurting both of us.

Standing up I start to walk away, my mind is too consumed in my new discovery to notice my surroundings, and I am stopped by a hand on my arm. Turning to its owner I am face to face with Ron. "Where are you going?" He yells over the music.

"I can't do this anymore," I say and then walk out of the pub. It takes me a few minutes to notice that Ron has followed me outside. It has started to sprinkle and I try to focus on him but my mind keeps wandering.

"Let's just go home then."

"No Ron, there's no us. I can't do us. What I am trying to say is that it's over Ron."

"You're breaking up with me? After all we have been through? After all I've stuck with you through?" His expression changes from anger to defeat. "Just tell me one thing Hermione. Why?"

I know he deserves the truth. The complete truth, but I don't know if I can give it to him. "I'm in love with someone else." He nods and hangs his head.

I can barely hear him when he says, "Who?"

"A stranger," I reply and walk away. It pains me to know that my answer is true. I've fallen in love with someone I hardly know.

**
When I open my eyes rain obscures my vision. I can make out the faint outline of Hogwarts in the distance and the lights of Hogsmeade. I feel as if I have aged fifty years in mere seconds. My past is catching up to me at a time when I am split between sorrow over the death of a relationship and a newfound sense of freedom.

The rain has already chilled me to the bone, but there is a cold running through me that reaches far deeper than the rain ever could. I begin to walk aimlessly as I think about what I have just given up by leaving Ron: security, love, protection, and a home. All for a flicker of hope; a new life that I could have. But that new life is already starting to look empty.

I remind myself I have made the right choice.

I find myself at the castle entrance. I try to open the heavy wooden doors and they are locked as I suspected. Creating a patronus I embed my message into it and watch as the otter soars to one of the highest towers where the headmistress' office resides.

I wait for about five minutes until I hear the creaking of thousands of old locks coming to life. The doors burst open and Professor McGonagall appears. Her silhouette stands centered, bathed in the dim light of the Entrance Hall. She grabs my icy hand and drags me inside. "Look at you, you're soaked." Professor McGonagall waves her wand and a gust of warm air hits me at full force.

I follow her through the familiar halls in silence. Different places bring back many memories. Filling me with a longing for the past. When decisions were a tad bit easier and we always had the protection of this castle.

Professor McGonagall gives the gargoyle the password and steps aside so I can step onto the moving staircase. Once we are inside her office she pulls me into an embrace and holds me closely. The longer I stay in her arms the smaller my fears, insecurities, and uncertainties seem to be.

I can sense eyes piercing my skin. I let go of Professor McGonagall and glance around the room but there is no one else here. I am about to mention this to her when a pair of kind, twinkling, blue eyes lock with mine. I smile at the familiar face observing us from his post above Professor McGonagall's desk. Long silver beard, crooked nose, and amusement and knowledge shining in his eyes; it is always a pleasure to be around Professor Dumbledore.

It feels as if he can see right through me and into the heart of my problems. I have no doubt that he can even if he only remains in a portrait.

"Miss Granger," his quiet, caring voice puts me at ease, "It is nice to see you."

"It is nice to see you too Professor." Heat is radiating off of Professor McGonagall who is standing right behind me.

"I sense that you are troubled my dear, however, I am pleased."

"Why is that?" I ask having no clue what I could have done to please him.

"Because you came to Hogwarts seeking love and nurture. I must say you have come to the perfect place. I also believe without the knowledge of what brought you here, Hermione."

I return my eyes to his and he gives me a warm smile. Full of love, encouragement, amusement, and everything I miss.

Professor McGonagall puts a hand on my back. "Please sit down, Hermione." I do as she requests and she takes a seat in the chair next to me. "Now tell me," she pauses and glances up at Professor Dumbledore, "and Albus what is wrong."

"Don't worry it will be as if I am not here," Dumbledore says causing me to smile again.

"I broke up with Ron."

"I always thought you were too smart for him. Harry would have been a better match for you." Professor McGonagall rolls her eyes at Dumbledore and I smirk at her.

"I am guessing you are afraid of what will happen next."

I remain silent for a moment trying to process all of my thoughts. "What do I do now? I couldn't stay with Ron that much was obvious. But the person I want, that I need…"

"Bella." I nod.

"Bellatrix Lestrange? She used to be such a sweet girl, under that tough exterior of course, when she first came to Hogwarts. I've always wondered what happened to her to change her. I knew bits and pieces of what happened. Influences and home life. She was always a very private girl. If I remember correctly, Minerva, you took her under your wing while she attended school here."

"Your memory is as sharp as usual Albus." Her comment makes him smile and then he turns to me.

"Oh right, please do carry on Miss Granger. If I must say so your life is even more fascinating now that you are out of Hogwarts. I've always had the feeling it would be." A faint blush creeps onto my cheeks.

"She could never feel the same way for me as I do for her."

"And she has told you this herself?"

"No, but…"

"You will never know until you ask. There is a reason Bellatrix fell out of her evil ways Hermione, and a large part of it has to do with you. I think... I know that there is more to Bella than meets the eye."

"What am I supposed to do? She doesn't want to see me. I hurt her…I…" Images of the sadness on her face when I left her this afternoon come back to me.

Professor McGonagall's voice pulls me out of my mind. "You hurt her dear? Last time I checked it takes a lot to hurt Bellatrix Lestrange. I believe that you hurt each other."

I open my mouth to ask how she knew that, but close it when no words will form. "The truth is written clearly on your face."

"She's right. I can see it too." Professor McGonagall turns to Dumbledore with a hint of irritation in her features. This only serves the purpose to amuse him more.

"What should I do?"

"What should you do? You should go to her. Spend time with her. Get to know the real Bella and don't give up if she seems stubborn, if she refuses to divulge her feelings and her past. She will in time. There is one thing you need above all else when dealing with Bellatrix, and that is patience."

"I've figured that out already." She smiles at me.

"If she doesn't want to talk to you right away at least you will have a place to stay. I know Dromeda, and she would never turn you away."

"You could always stay at Hogwarts," Dumbledore suggests. "You would make a great teacher Miss Granger, with the proper training, and then Minerva could stop multitasking between her duties as Headmistress and her duties as the Transfiguration Professor and Head of Gryffindor."

"Why haven't you hired anyone else?" Suddenly I feel guilty for coming here to talk about my meager problems.

"No one properly qualified has applied for the position. And don't worry about me dear I can manage. And as for you, Albus, it is not your job to hand out teaching positions anymore."

"I was merely hinting."

"She wouldn't…" "I wouldn't" Professor McGonagall and I say at the same time.

"She wouldn't let me teach here Professor Dumbledore. I know Professor McGonagall well enough to know that she wants me to explore life, and once I have I'm certain if I came back Professor McGonagall would be more than willing to give me a job. If you need me though and are willing to hire me I would take the job now. You need time to relax too."

"I appreciate the offer, Hermione, but I will have to decline for now. After describing how I fell about the subject word for word I fear you are getting to know me too well my love. "

"Maybe I am," I reply and give her a hug. I walk to the door and throw over my shoulder, "Thanks for the help, both of you," Before leaving.

**
I stand waiting at Dromeda's door. The wind has picked up and is fiercely blowing through my soaked clothes. I hear shuffling behind the door and then it is opened. Tonks ushers me in and puts a finger over her lips before pointing at Teddy. I nod.

Drying myself off I wait for Tonks to return from putting her son in his crib.

I hear muffled footsteps and Tonks comes in and motions for me to take a seat at the table. "It is late, is everything okay? Are the Weasleys okay?"

"Everything is fine, well I broke up with Ron, but everything is fine. I was hoping I could stay here for a few days."

"Of course. As long as you have no problem with Bellatrix being here as well."

"How long is she staying for?"

"So you do have a problem with it."

"No, of course not, I was just curious. She has been wandering for so long I am just trying to figure out whether or not she is staying."

"As far as I know as long as she wants. Why did you break up with Ron?"

I send her a sad smile, "It's complicated."

She gazes into my eyes for a moment, "Complicated and has to do with my aunt."

"Are you two getting along better?"

"As well as can be expected. It's only been a few weeks after all." Tonks raises an eyebrow at me. "You're not even going to attempt to deny liking Bellatrix?"

"Why should I deny what is true?"

"I see."

"What do you see?"

"Nothing."

"Come on Tonks what do you see?"

"Nothing."

"Then why did you say that?"

"Oh sweetie, I see something. It is dancing around on your face, but it is nothing you don't know already."

"What is it?" She smirks. She is taking pleasure in annoying me.

"Love." I watch her in shock, which only makes her smile wider.

"If you wanted to see Bellatrix you are a few hours too late to talk to her tonight."

"Oh."

"You don't want to know why?"

"You seem to want to tell me why so please enlighten me."

"You bet I do. I can't fathom how you could love my aunt…ugh…maybe this will make you love her less. I've discovered tonight that she is an alcoholic."

"What?"

"You heard me. An alcoholic. As soon as you left she drank until she passed out at the table. At seven o'clock! Mom had to levitate her to her room. Of course I refused to do it, and thought it would be hysterical to leave her face first in her uneaten bowl of ice cream."

I roll my eyes at Tonks. "I'm sure you did."

"I have a theory."

I wait for her to tell me but when she doesn't continue I take the bait, "What is your theory Tonks?"

"That she is hiding her alcohol dependency from you so you will still like her, which leaves me having to take care of her. I didn't sign up for that."

"You didn't take care of her Dromeda did."

"Minor detail."

"Where is Bella's room?" Despite Tonks' light mood I feel guilty that Bellatrix drank herself into a stupor.

"Upstairs second door on your left." I stand up and make my way to the staircase which leads down into the kitchen. "If you were thinking about fooling around with her tonight I would change your plans because she is dead to the world."

I turn and face Tonks. The carefree, happy expression on her face causes me to hold back my comment. She is having fun acting like a teenager and it has been so long since I have seen her genuinely smile there is not a comment she could make in this world that would cause me to wipe that grin off her face.

I follow Tonks' directions and quietly open the bedroom door. Bella is curled up in the center of the bed. Sitting down on the edge of the bed I remove my shoes. I crawl under the covers, and mold my body to Bellatrix's. As I slide an arm around her waist she sighs and links our fingers together.

Smiling I close my eyes and bury my face in Bella's back knowing that this will be the best night's sleep I have gotten in a very long time.