At work I find out exactly what happened after Peeta's announcement. We started bombing District 13 and my uncle says that it'll continue for at least the next few days. I try to ask Daphne and Aella about it, but they admit that they don't know anything for sure themselves. The last contact they received from District 13 was that they were all going further underground until the bombs ceased.

On every screen in the studio they show the bombing. It looks even worse than the old airings they showed of Thirteen. And experts and analysts talk about the unlikelihood of survival. I half believe them because all of their statistics and facts sound so legitimate and I don't have anything else to go on. Daphne is convinced that they're alright, but admits that there are succession protocols in case Plutarch dies and that she hopes that if they saved anyone, it should have been Katniss.

I remember those brief seconds of her on TV, how brave she looked and empathetic. She has something about her that draws people to her, and for a moment I wish that she had agreed to be on my show. And then I get the crazy idea to start making videos again, where I could openly state my opinions, tell everyone the truth, like I had been planning to do, but of course President Snow would never let anyone see it, and then I'd be killed for sure, but not before I was tortured into giving up Aella and her family and Daphne.

As the days go by, I find myself pacing at home or just sitting quietly at my station at work, biting my lip and staring into space. But luckily I don't stand out. Everyone is pretty much acting the same way, even my uncle. Whenever we talk he looks distracted and worried. At one point when I come to, I look around at all the faces around me and realize why we're going to lose the war, regardless what happens to District 13.

Every single person is caught up in their own fears that no one notices anyone else. No one tries to comfort anyone, no one cares about anyone else other than themselves. I never noticed before because, well, it's easy to be friendly when everything's going right, and nothing's ever gone so back bad before.

The Capitol is all about separation. We separated Panem into distinct Districts and make them fight each other, we're even further removed from the rest of Panem, and then there's Westside and the Eastside, and even the avoxes, we make sure they can't interact with anyone ever again and all the way up to the President, who sits secluded and protected inside his home. He's been trying to make us believe that we're all united against the Districts, but we're not.

I can't even remember the last time I talked to or saw Andy or Penelope. I guess when it really comes down to it, there's no real relationship in the Capitol. Thinking about Orion, I laugh at how stupid I was, thinking we were so in love and comparing us to Katniss and Peeta? Peeta died and almost died multiple times to save Katniss and she's done the same for him. And she even vounteered for the Games in place of her sister. And Orion? He dumped me the moment I ran into trouble with the government. And me? I flirted with Finnick every chance I got and I would get so mad or cry if Orion so much as looked at me "funny".

The next night I finally hear that most everyone at District 13 is okay and that the bombing have finally ceased. And most importantly, Katniss is alive, but the biggest news doesn't come until the next day.

As I'm getting into my car, Daphne's car pulls up and she jumps out to greet me and asks if she can borrow one of my dresses for her mother's birthday. I tell her of course, and we run upstairs to my room and while I search through my closet, she tells me why she's really here.

"District 13 is sending out a team to rescue Peeta and the other Victors being held captive."

"So he's alive?" I say, surprised. I don't know if this is a good thing or not though.

"Yeah. During the rescue mission, they're going to try and distract the Capitol by airing more propos. Can you make sure that they stay on?"

I pull out a dress that would look great on her.

"I'll do my best."

I hand it to her and she takes it.

At the station, everyone is as distracted with their own thoughts as ever, which makes it easy for me to get into the broadcast room. Since the last time we aired the propos, I decided I should expand my abilities and started getting a basic understanding of the technical side of production.

At exactly 12 o'clock, it begins. Katniss flashes across the screen, but she doesn't stay on long. Instead, she's replaced with Finnick. At first I'm so confused that I forget the reason I'm here, until someone switches the network back over to us.

Now the room is all in a frenzy. Everyone wakes from their stupor and goes back on alert to make sure they don't lose control again. I follow their example. I don't know what the rebels in District 13 are exactly doing, but it doesn't matter. I just need to do my part to make sure the rescue team is safe.

The next time it switches back to Finnick, I'm ready. I pull out a couple plugs and scramble some wires, making sure to make everything look accidental.

It buys him some time, but it's hard for me to concentrate on my job the more I listen to him. Whenever I saw Finnick he was always laughing or flirting but it's like he's a completely different person.

The things he says about the president is surprising, although it shouldn't be. And I can tell that at least a couple people are shaken, including me. But even knowing how corrupt and awful the president really is, I didn't realize just how terrible he was. No wonder Finnick was so good at getting people to fall for him, he had so much practice.

I wipe a few hot tears away and think on the times he guest appeared on my videos, I probably helped him get more customers. I silently apologize to him. When he's finally done, I disappear into the backdrop. No one noticed me, they were too busy trying to stop the broadcast and, I think, listening.

Everyone at the station is kind of frozen in place, still staring at the screens even though it was clear Finnick finished.

I weave through them and leave, knowing I won't be missed. I exit and come out into the sun. It's hot today and my house is miles away, but for now I want to walk, as far as I can. Thinking about everything Finnick said, I just feel ashamed of being a Capitol citizen. I can't understand how I used to blindly adore President Snow. And all those other people he talked about, I even recognized a couple names as some of the stockholders in my father's company.

After a long time of walking, I finally have to sit down. My legs hurt and I'm still so far away from home. I feel so pathetic that I don't even have the stamina to get home. My neck stings, it's probably sunburned.

As I sit on the sidewalk, luckily no one's around to judge me, I hear someone call my name and see Aella. She plops down next to me and says she was on her way to see me. She says good job on keeping the propo aired.

I ask her if she saw it.

She shakes her head.

"I was helping the rescue team get the Victors out."

I stare at her, but she doesn't give me any more details.

"They're halfway back to District 13 by now."

"That was fast."

"It had to be. What are you doing out here?"

"I was trying to walk back home."

She laughs and shoves my arm.

"So why'd you stop? It's only a mile down from here."

Standing, she offers me her hand and helps me up and gives me a hug.

"Don't look so down, we're winning!"

I hug her back and smile because she's right. By the end of the week the only district that's still under Capitol control is District 2, but that's to be expected. I'm amazed by how a few words from Katniss were enough to do this. I tell Aella that she should be marketed as the antithesis of President Snow the next time she visits and she says that she already is, as the Mockingjay. When I ask her why mockingjays are so significant.

"You know how they were created right?"

"Yeah."

"They're like a constant reminder to the Capitol of one of their biggest failures during the rebellion."

"But that was such a little thing."

"Yeah, but you see? They were a mistake, but now they're everywhere. They didn't just survive, Helena, they're thriving."

And I suppose she's right.