No,no, no. I'm not going to let Damon just talk to me like that. Yeah, i know sounds like a stupid excuse to get out of my house, but i didn't think of it.

So, i was pissed and i was angry and i was confused. When i came to the boarding house, i didn't knock, i just started to yell from the porch:

-Damon! Come out of your room! Damon! Go downstairs! - i was searching for him with my eyes and wandering everywhere.

-What are you doing? - Stefan asked quietly

-I'm looking for that idiot who doesn't know what he is talking about.

-Damon's not here.

-What? Where is he then? - i didn't have a slightest idea that he might not be around

-I don't know. You should ask his secretary

-Funny. Haha.

-Please, don't come here anymore. I still can't forget what you did.

-Wait...You think i came here because of you? - i couldn't believe my ears - Stefan, you know how sorry i am but i came here because i want to talk to Damon. Not you.

-Okay. As you say.

-Stefan. Don't be a girl, ok?

-Excuse me?

-Oh, whatever. Just don't think that the world belongs to you. Oh, we are so different.

-Right. - and he just moved back to his room.

-Oh, perfect - i whispered

And i still needed to find Damon. I just needed the truth. And probably i knew where he was gonna be. The Grill. The bar.

-What the hell did you text me? - i tried to yell as much quiter as i could - What does it even mean? Typical Kate? - i showed him my cellphone screen.

-Shh, calm down. You're ruining my mood.

-I'm what? - i screamed and then started to whisper again - You must give me an explanation. Looks like you know me much better than i do, and i don't like it at all. What was i like before?

-You really want to know?

-Yes, please.

-Well, here's a thing - i can't tell you - and he grinned

-What? Why?

-I just don't want to. Sorry. It happens. You' ll get over it.

-Damon - i started carefully - we know each other for a while and we agreed that there could be no secrets between us. Soo?

-Yeah. I don't remeber it. Look you really don't need to know your past. Trust me. You don't.

-I think i can handle it.

-That's not the point. I won't be ablу to handle it. Once you know, you can't get over it.- he was getting more upset

-What? I can't be that bad - i laughed awkwardly

-Right. You're not. Now, but there were moments when you wasn't who you are. But even then i loved you more than Ste...more that anyone else.

-And now you lost me. You loved me? I mean as a friend? Because that's completely not ok for you if not.

-Look. I've heard you want to know about Katherine. Is it correct?

-It is. But she is the last thing my mind is busy with.

-And yet she should be the first. Let me ask. What do you know about her? Do you understand who she was?

-I do. - I answered briefly - And i don't get how you both could love her

-Well, but you understand why stefan and me like you, right?

-Well, we are different. She was evil

-Was she?

-What? I mean. I don't know. I never met her. But it is what i heard.

-Ok. Ok. Tell me since when do you remeber yourself?

-Well, i lived not with my parents. As i know that. In the age of 16 i moved to them from my Grams. And i don't remember my life there. At all. Then we lived with my Elena, Jeremy, then my parents died and then i moved away. And then i got back. But in my dreams i see myself in an medieval dress runnnin away. I think that i could have participated in some thematic pageants back there.

-And you never wondered what's happening with your mind?

-What do you mean?

-How could you lose ur memory?

-Well, as i was said - i hit my head in a car accident and here i am

- Do you believe in that sort of crap?

-Why are you talking to me like that?

-Well, it was you who wanted to know the truth

-And how is it connected with Katherine and my memory loss, huh?

-Have you ever seen her?

-No, that's why i had an argument with Stefan. I tried to find her photo or something in his diary and he caught me.

-I see. Ok, i think i can help you. - and he got the photo out of his pocket

-Damon, why did you do that with my photo? If you want me to be an ancient lady in a corset you should tell me. Photoshop is the worst you could imagine.

- Honey you don't get it, it's not you. It's Katherine

- look I'm sorry but I don't get youe metaphors

- its not one

- Do you mean that Katherine is another twin? I mean how is that?

- You are going not there. Look try to remember, you really dont know her? Not a bit?

p- I don't get it. What are you trying to say?

- for Gods sake. Its you, Kate. Katherine is you

- excuse Me. What the fuck are you talking about? Wasn't she a vampire to start with? - i really was getting his point. Some stupid joke as usual. I hated this. Damon could imagine anything just to avoid some serious conversations. Typical Damon.

-Oh, honey. Open your eyes, try to remember if you want it. And even your dreams show you that you were born long before Bette Davis was born.

-Look. Stop joking. Usually i'd laugh with you but now your eyes, they are scaring me. You seem insane. - I hugged him with a worry in my mind. He must really loved that Katherine if he's trying to make me be her. He even photoshopped my photo to prove that i could live with him back there.

-Damon, i think you're overreacting. I'm here for you and i will be always there. Please, don't scary me. - i whispered almost crying. I cried because of his mood, but mostly because i got really jealous. Not the kind of jealous when you want to kill anyone but when you understand you can't do anything to help just because you were born really late. So late. Whatever i can do it's nothing. I couldn't compare with a ghost. I am human with so many flaws, that even i wouldn't date myself.

-You don't understand. You just don't want to. You have to put your pink glasses away from your face. - he whispered back

-Damon - i couldn't look into his eyes. It was really painful - I am no Katherine. I am sorry. I am not your perfect girl you are in love with. I know that. All i ask is please, don't talk about her in my presence anymore. I just can't stand the feeling that i will never replace her in your heart. It hurts too much. I know i ask a lot. But please, please.

He looked into my eyes like he saw Tarantino saying that he is the most untalented person. I know it's a weird metaphore. It's not even one. Whatever. And pufff, he went away.

And i still needed to know the truth about my past. My next victim to talk to was Elena. She hust had to know how i was when we met.