When I was at work on Friday, I heard some very sad news that a man came up to the Century 16 Theater in Colorado and shot a lot of people. I felt bad for them, and all of their families are sad forever. On the other hand, I am learning some new conversation skills from my mother to spend some time with people you and I know. Like 'Hello, my name is (insert name here), 'What are you doing today?', or 'How was your day?' Anyway, here's the next chapter!

That night, there was a terrible storm. Lightning flashed and thunder rumbled. The freighter, known as 'The Big House', was cruising west down the Ohio River through the driving rain. Inside the ship's cargo hold was Doris Deer, sleeping in a cage. She had no recollection of how she got onboard and locked up. And as she was about to wake up, voices were heard all around her.

"Do you think she's alright?" said a voice.

"I think she is coming around." said another.

"Ssshhh, quiet now. Give her some time." said a third voice.

Doris slowly rubbed her eyes and scratched her back, yawning. Her vision became blurry at first, but as it cleared up, she could see different people around her. "Where am I?" She asked. "You are aboard The Big House, madam." Said a teenage boy named Kwame. (From Captain Planet) "But another nickname for this ship is the Good Ship Misery." added a businesswoman named Carol Colossal. (From A Pup Named Scooby Doo)

"How long was I out for?" Doris asked, again. "Three days, ma'am. You've been tranquilized in the backside." stated Kwame. "Three days? That's it? Three days?" Her voice trailed off. "Then… this is the end of our relationship. I'm sure Copyboy thinks I'm gone for good." "Who is this… Copyboy? Kwame asked, curiously. "My fiancé back home." Doris said, sadly. "That's my nickname for Peter Possum." "Hmmm…" pondered Kwame. "Well, you must be the first one from the Walt Disney Company." Said another businesswoman named Julie. (Also from A Pup Named Scooby Doo) "A relatively obscure one, I'm afraid." said Carol Colossal. "What is your name, anyway?" "I'm Doris Deer." Doris said. "Ooh, welcome aboard, Ms. Deer!" said Julie. "Oh, who am I kidding? It's not the right word."

"How about… Outrage! That's much more like it!" snapped Carol. Various chatter rose from the captive 'toons aboard.

"Abomination! Absolute abomination!"

"It's a bore, don't you think?"

"The horror."

"I've got a bad feeling about this." Doris thought to herself as her cage started drifting.

Rheneas: If you're into pain and agony,

Josie and the Pussycats: Agony,

Kwame: If you love the great indoors,

All: Welcome to the Good Ship Misery,

The misery's… all yours!

Every day begins with misery,

Josie and the Pussycats: Misery,

All: Breakfast in a rusty cup,

Josie, Melody, Valerie, Alan, Alexander, his twin sister Alexandra, and their mascot, Sebastian (All from Josie and the Pussycats) formed a pyramid while clapping their mugs together as cheers.

All: Then we all get dull and miserable,

And then we all… throw up!

They all fell down in a heap.

All: The boots have got,

The place so hot,

That to the spot,

You've got the rot,

And ooooohhhhhhhh!

Kwame: There's never sun!

Melody: The rats have run!

Rheneas: Does anyone,

Remember fun?

All: No! No! No! No!

Rheneas: Just thought I'd ask.

A jet of water splashed in his face.

All: If you're thinkin' this could never be,

Josie and the Pussycats: Think again!

All: If you're thinkin' it's… the Ritz,

Rheneas: Fat chance!

All: Sorry, but the Good Ship Misery…

Mayor Manx: Is a re-alit-ay.

Rheneas: What?!

All: Doris, Baby,

This… Is… The Pits!

Poor Doris felt like she was going to hurl as the ship continued its way down the river.

Mayor Manx: Hmmm… ahem.

You sit and think.

Julie and Carol: And pray we'll sink.

Kwame: Your muscles shrink!

Rheneas: You start to stink and,

All: P-uuuuuuuuuu!

Josie and the Pussycats: And when they cough,

That slimy slop,

And drop the glop,

Of some on top, it's

Woo-hoooooooo!

Ooooohhhhh!

Ooooohhhhh!

All: And...Sooooooo…

Everyday's a total tragedy.

Josie and the Pussycats: Tragedy!

All: Then the days begin to blur,

Getting bored aboard the Misery,

Mayor Manx: Is a Reeeeee-dundan-cay!

All: What?!

Rheneas: Is everybody miserable?!

Melody: Now you're talkin'!

All: Yes, sirrrrrrrrrr!

Then all the cages drifted back into their regular places as Doris looked at them, seriously and said, "What? I can't believe you people!" "But it's true!" said Carol Colossal. "It's like this everyday!" "Besides," Griped Rheneas. (From Thomas the Tank Engine) "Staying put is all we can do!" "You think about it. Have you ever done something important in your life? Haven't you?" Then, something inside the little engine's mind snapped. He remembered an important thing he did from a long time ago. "Ms. Deer… I remember." "You do?" Doris asked. "Yeah, tell us about it. We wanna' know!" added Alexander. "Well, I saved my railway by pulling a train full of passengers home, despite some jammed valve gear."

"I've also done something important in my life too." chimed in Mayor Manx. "I've taken down my nemesis, the Red Lynx in episode 9 of SWAT Kats. And I should be proud of it."

"And we've taken down some bad guys on a lot of our musical tours." said Josie.

"I must confess," Continued Rheneas. "We have let ourselves go when we were captured." "Yes, I see. But who would want to steal you guys?" Doris asked, curiously. Suddenly there was a sudden shout of, "Somebody, get a hold of the tail!" "Here come the boots!" Gasped the little tank engine. Quickly they all cried out, "The Boots!" And they all screamed in terror as they scrambled back in their cages. "Hey! SHUT UP DOWN THERE!" Doris looked up and saw Steve, Laura, Max, and the two fake MPs (All from Scooby Doo and the Alien Invaders)bring in five new prisoners. The first figure was a fat detective with a black hair (a crested toupee'), black eyes, and a black mustache. He wore a dark grey vest, a red necktie, a light grey buttoned-down shirt, dark grey pants, and black shoes. He was known as Lucky Piquel.

The second figure was an orange 'toon bobcat with golf club-like ears, black eyes, a pale face, feet, and snout with a red nose, and black spots. He wore a blue police officer's uniform which consisted of a cap with a black rim and a badge and a blue jacket and black necktie. He even wore white Mickey Mouse- style gloves. His name was Bonkers D. Bobcat.

The third figure was a yellow 'toon rabbit with black eyes, and a pink nose. He wore a white glove on the right hand, a green shirt, and a purple sock with pink stripes on the left foot. His name was Fall-Apart Rabbit. (Author's note: Let's face it folks. He always falls apart. Literally)

The fourth figure was a big, yellow tabby cat wearing a blue helmet with a red stripe going down the center, a black mask, black fingerless gloves, and a blue and red G-suit. His name was T-Bone.

The last and fifth figure was an orange tomcat wearing the same outfit T-Bone had. But he was smaller than him. His name was Razor.

"NO, NO, NO!" Bonkers wailed, holding onto the handrail "I don't wanna' go in there! I'm a cop! I don't wanna be here!"

"Oh, shut up! Moron!" Laura snapped.

"You guys will never take us alive!" T-Bone snapped.

"Yeah? We already have, big guy!" Steve sneered. Then he turned to Lucky. "Get in there, Fat boy! Or I'll let Max here give you a knuckle sandwich!" And he slammed the door and locked it. "Now, shut up and stay put!" And he, Laura, Max, and the fake MP's headed back to the bridge, locking the door behind them.

"JUST WAIT UNTIL I GET MY HANDS ON ALL OF YOU! I'LL TAKE YOU ALL DOWNTOWN!" Lucky shouted, shaking the cage door violently. But then he looked at his hands and said, "Wait. What am I doing? I just wanna put 'em in jail. Not beat 'em up. Cops don't do that."

"Ahem?"

"Oh, yeah. You too, Bonkers."

"Don't worry, Lucky. They'll be back. And when the next time comes... We're gonna cream 'em!" He pounded his fist into the palm of his hand.

"Yeah, Luckster." Said Fall-Apart. "There's always a pot of gold at the end of each rainbow."

Lucky looked irritated and said, "Fall-Apart. Just what are you talking about? It's ST. PATRICK'S DAY, YOU MORON!"

Fall-Apart cringed and jittered so hard that his ears popped off and his arms shook off, too.

"Please, relax, sir." Kwame said, kindly. "I promise you, we'll all work together to take down those slave traders."

"No thanks, kid." Lucky replied. "We're just cops. We're gonna take down those criminals like we did on our show."

"Us, too." added T-Bone. "We've busted a lot of bad guys on our show, and we'll do it again. Right, Razor?" "Right." replied Razor.

Then, Lucky and Doris looked at each other. It seemed maybe one of them… or maybe both of them… seemed familiar.

"Doris?"

"Lucky?

"Is that… really you?"

"I don't know. If we could just find out who we are…"

They looked closer into the eyes. Then, something made them gasp!

Cue Flashback

Walt Disney Studios, January 1995

The cast of "The Shnookums and Meat Funny Cartoon Show" were having a party for the first episode of the show. Everyone was having a grand old time. Shnookums and Meat were eating their chips dunked in guacamole; Tex Tinstar, his horse Here Boy, and his smelly sidekick Chafe were grooving to the music; and Pith Possum and Obediah had their autographs signed by Bonkers, Timon, Pumbaa, and Genie.

Meanwhile, Doris Deer was standing next to Lucky Piquel and his family. They were invited to the party, too. "Hi, I'm Doris." She introduced herself to the detective. "Hi. Name's Lucky. This is my wife Dyl, and my daughter, Marilyn. And my partner over there with that superhero is Bonkers." "Hi." greeted Dyl and Marilyn. "So, you're just a cop like Commissioner Stress, right?" "Yeah." replied Lucky. "Well, to think of it," She started. "Being a police officer is a busy job. But being a reporter on the other hand, it's much busier." "Yeah? Tell us." said Lucky. "First of all, you start looking for a big scoop. Like a bank robbery." "Uh huh." said Marilyn. "And then, you have to get a little in-depth. You go to the scene of the crime, wait for the criminal, and then you sneak in to get the top story." "Go on, go on." encouraged Lucky.

"All of a sudden, I'm in trouble. I'm either captured by a villain or led down on a conveyor belt to my doom, and suddenly, Pith Possum comes to the rescue… and saves me. He'll never let you down." "Wow." said Lucky.

"Awesome." said Marilyn.

"I just can't believe it!" said Dyl.

"PICKLEEEEEEEEEE!" shouted a voice.

"Aw, man." thought Lucky to himself. "If it isn't Captain Jerkwad. Head of the Agrabanian division."

Razoul walked right up to him and said, "Do not get too friendly with these 'toons. They're not standard like the rest of us! If you catch their germs, you'll end up just like them!" Lucky felt disappointed and looked at Dyl and Marilyn who shrugged their shoulders as if to say, 'We don't have a choice.'. Doris on the other hand, felt both her heart sink and tears streak down her face. "This isn't fair to me!" she thought to herself. "You shall stay away from these simpletons until the day they lose their job!"

End flashback

"Oh Lucky, It is you!"

"Yeah! You too!"

And they, Bonkers, and Fall-Apart broke out into a happy reunion as did the SWAT Kats with Mayor Manx, the Pussycats, Kwame, Carol Colossal, and Julie. (Except Rheneas who just felt left out.)

"Doris, baby! Long time, no see! How've ya been?" asked Bonkers excitedly. "It's good to see you too, Bonkers, and Fall-Apart." Doris said, happily. "All right, all right. Save the party for later." said T-Bone.

"Yeah. Hey, mayor, where's this cargo ship headed to, mayor?" asked Razor.

"Ah, Razor, my boy, our destination is difficult to determine at this moment." said Mayor Manx.

"Hey, Pussycats! You know where we're goin'?"

"I don't know, too." said Josie.

"Me neither." said Valerie.

"How about a concert?" guessed Melody, and laughed stupidly.

"I think," said Kwame, "We would be somewhere in America."

"We'd be in Ohio, buddy." said Lucky. "And I know, we're on the southern coast of the state, for crying out loud!"

"Hey, Kwame. Where do we dock?" asked T-Bone.

"Yeah. Is it some harbor town or something?" asked Razor, too.

"SWAT Kats," Kwame said with a sigh. "I am not sure where we will dock. But," He continued. "I've heard stories of shipmates… selling captives to sweatshops."

"What?" Doris asked, worriedly.

"Sweatshops, my rear end!" Lucky snapped. "We're not goin' to any sweatshop. Heck, I'll go to first and second mate, then lookout, then cook, and then the captain of this zoo on a boat! I'd make them turn this ship around if I have to!"

"Yeah, boss! We're with ya all the way!" added Bonkers.

"Duhhhhhh, yeah Lucky!" said Fall-Apart.

"Who's gonna stay in these cages? Not us!" said T-Bone.

"Yeah!" added Razor.

"No, I can't go to a sweatshop." said Doris. Panting heavily, she continued, "I have to get back to Possum City!"

But as she finished speaking, the door to the cargo hold opened up and there stood Steve, looking nastier than ever. "All right, folks, listen up!" Everyone turned to him as he continued saying, "We're gonna be docking in Cincinnati tomorrow. So, we're all gonna put you in a sweatshop!" Everyone gasped! "That's right. Hard work, no play." Then he looked at all of them before saying, "Sleep tight... don't let the bed-bugs bite." And he chuckled as he locked the door.

"Awww…man." said Lucky, miserably.

"That's it for the escape plan." said Chance. "It's ruined."

Poor Bonkers and Fall-Apart were acting like babies as they sucked their thumbs and rocked back and forth. " 'Toons." said Lucky, irritated. "Well, see ya in the morning, Ms. Deer."

"Good night, Detective Piquel." Doris responded, sadly. And she and all of the prisoners fell asleep.

Cue dream

Inside the industrial heart of Cincinnati, Ohio and high on top of a mountain was a giant dress factory. On the rooftop, the Grand Duke of Owls and his six owl minions were wearing oxygen masks to prevent them from breathing the factory smoke. (Also known as Carbon Dioxide, as we speak.) They stood watch over the front gates silently and still, like a group of castle gargoyles, making sure no one escaped the factory. Inside, the girls were in charge of sewing and making the dresses and putting them on coat racks. The boys and Rheneas were in charge of shipping the orders across town.

Doris was not doing well. She worked as hard and fast as she could to get everything done in time, only to get scrapes and cuts along the way. Then she heard voices.

"Petey, give it a rest. Ms. Deer's gone."

"Nuh uh, Randall. I believe she's still out there somewhere in this big country of ours. And she'll come home in time to marry me." said Peter.

"What? You… wanna marry her?" And all of the WWH employees burst out laughing.

"Come on, man." said a dog. "You're a loser. She's dead by now."

"Well for one thing, Doris is a good girlfriend of mine. She's kind, and sweet, and she sometimes looks out for others and-"

Suddenly, dark clouds swirled across the sky; Lightning flashed; Thunder rumbled; a tornado of snowflakes spun up to the group and then it spun in place to reveal the Trix: Icy, Darcy, and Stormy.

"Afternoon, gentlemen." The male animals quickly screamed in terror as they ran off. "I'll save you, sir!" shouted Obediah. He was just about to reach him when Hunch swooped down saying, "Annihilation!" "On second thought… I'm outta' here." And Obediah quickly ran off. Peter started sweating with worry.

"Peter, my faithful boyfriend," Icy said with calmness. "I want you to be my husband." Unfortunately, she was slobbering on his hands, since she was eating a melon.

"Leave me alone, Icy," Peter said, trying to be brave. "I love Doris Deer."

Doris could only look on with fear and anxiety.

"Doris… Ha!" Icy said sarcastically. "I'm deeply sympathized, Peter. but, since she is nowhere to be seen or heard of… I offer my own hand."

"I'm still going with a 'No'." said Peter, once again.

"Oh, think about it." said Icy. "Arrive at a decision, later. But remember… you must choose a wife before Friday the 13th or…" She slid her finger across her throat making a "gcktt" sound. "You're dead." Clouds of snowflakes encircled the Trix and their henchmen. "Good luck… boyfriend." And they all cackled evilly as they vanished into thin air. Peter sadly flopped down on his back. "What am I gonna' do?" Doris tried to run for the door, but two of the owls blocked her way saying sharply, "GET BACK TO WORK!" "No, no! It can't be!" fretted Doris. She started backing up against the wall as the owls came closer with spiked clubs and whips. She was doomed and trapped for all eternity!

End dream

Well, there you have it. The fifth chapter for "One Crazy Roadtrip"! Sorry for the long wait, though.