A/N: No one shoot! I am so sorry for not updating this. To be COMPLETELY honest, I forgot all about this story because I lost passion for it. But I stumbled on a few reviews and I was so happy. I am eternally grateful for your readership guys and humbly thankful. I hope I haven't lost a few readers due to lack of updates. I vow to wrap this up ASAP. Enjoy

Angelica

I nervously rubbed the rim of my coffee mug, staring at the lukewarm liquid as I added in more unnecessary cream and sugar. I wasn't even planning on drinking the damn thing; I only bought it because the bitch at the diner said I could not sit and wait without buying something. So, to shut her mouth, I shelled out my last few dollars on some coffee and a burnt English muffin. I let out a low sigh, contemplating on what to say to him.

Chuckie and I haven't spoken in three months since our breakup and I was surprised to get a call from him this evening to sit down and finally talk about things. I felt empty and cold inside, even the leather jacket I wore not heating my frigid heart. I told Chuckie about the drunken night with the Jamaican man and all the other men I blew in the course of our relationship. I told him I didn't start acting out until the divorce between my mother and father was finalized and Drew had moved into his new home with his new family. I didn't know how to cope and was unsure of myself so I resorted to the only thing I knew: sex. Apparently Chuckie was too brokenhearted to really sympathize with me and it only made matters worse.

"The hell, Angelica!?"

I gripped onto his sweatshirt for dear life, balling my eyes out as I begged him to stay. "Charles, I'm sorry. I swear it was only that one time and the furthest I ever went with anyone was oral sex."

"That's it, huh?" he said in a snarky, sarcastic tone. He violently pulled away from me, knocking over the books and random shit atop of his desk. He screamed, pulling his orange locks. I buried my head in my hands.

"Chuckie…"

"Don't say my name!"

"Chuckie…please…."

"Don't say my name!"

I sniffled again, this time looking up at him. His back was turned away from me; his hands in his pockets. I could tell he was trying to ebb his anger in order to not hurt me or damage a room he couldn't pay for. I got up from his bed, slowly slinking towards my beloved to wrap my arms around him. He turned around too quickly for me to react, shoving me against his bed. "Don't fucking touch me!"

"Charles!" I screamed as I tried to calm him down. I had never seen Chuckie so irate in my life. I was one of the few people that new Chuckie had a temper on him. I never would have guessed the shy, timid little boy I grew up with would have such a nasty anger problem when he grew into adulthood. It took a lot to make Charles angry and the problem wasn't getting him angry, it was calming him down. People often times mistakenly bullied Chuckie in high-school because they thought he was an easy target. One afternoon when I was not there due to severe menstrual cramps, some jock ex-boyfriend of Savannah's said something foul about Chuckie's deceased mother that set him off. Before I knew it, I was headed down to the Flint police station with a couple hundred in bail money; urging the poor boy's parents to not press assault and battery charges against Chuckie. I was not exactly sure what transpired but all I knew was that it took seven security guards to get him off Trent.

Seeing my love this angry was something I had never seen before and it damn near frightened me. "Angelica, I think it's best you leave."

I grew mute, trying to find the right words to say. "…Chuckie…"

"Don't say my name!" he roared, shoving me again. I fell back against the headboard, knocking the back of my skull. If I wasn't so terrified I would have gotten angry. "I don't want to hurt you Angelica so you better go…" his voice trailed off into a low growl.

My breathing grew heavy as I tried in a last attempt to salvage our relationship. I felt my heart break into pieces watching the man I loved more than life itself become so angry at what I had done. I didn't even care that some freshman tried to suck him off hours before; I was more concerned as to if I would wake up with a boyfriend…my husband. "Charles…please just talk to me."

"Get out, Angelica…."

"Charles…"

"Get out, Angelica…." He repeated again, this time with more bass in his tone. He moved towards the door, opening it for me. I clutched myself, feeling hot pelts of tears begin to stream down my face. "I won't say it again."

"But, if you would just listen to me…!" I couldn't even finish my sentence before he lunged towards me to grab my forearm; dragging me kicking and screaming to the doorway before he tossed me out into the hall. I felt myself curl into fetal position, tears coursing against my cheeks as I scream for forgiveness. A few of his floormates opened their doors to see what was going on, a few even coming to my aid and berating Chuckie for treating me so inhumanely. But he was justified. I had broken his heart and it was shattered when he slammed the door in my face.

That scene still replays in my dreams over and over again on the nightly basis. For the first month, I would call and text him non-stop; even begging to even get the smallest response back but my attempts were foiled. From what I hear, Chuckie had slept with April the evening he threw me out and went on this huge 'fucking' spree the majority part of the remainder of the semester. I decided after a month of trying to get back into his good graces, I would leave him alone to lick his wounds. I couldn't blame him for bedding other women. The woman he loved had just spat out his heart like rancid meat when all he had done was been good to me.

I felt my stomach grow a bit queasy at the smell of my burnt English muffin. I was still a bit sore from earlier in the week when I had gotten an abortion. I found out three weeks ago that I was pregnant after I had forgotten that I had missed my period a few weeks before. I was so busy trying to get my life back on track that I didn't notice the binge eating, sudden weight gain, and vomiting were symptoms of pregnancy. I wasn't sure if it was Charles' baby or the random Jamaican man whose name and address are long forgotten so to save myself heartbreak I decided to do what not only best for me but the child. I didn't tell anyone about it, not even my mother; only Suzie because her mother is a doctor and she was the one who performed the procedure. Suzie held my hand throughout the entire process and even consoled me afterwards. She bought me ice-cream, Chinese take-out, and took me back to her place so I wouldn't be in an empty house again to deal with my sudden trauma.

I glanced at my phone, tapping the blank screen in boredom before I heard the bell of the front door of the diner jingle. In a fleece jacket and jeans stood my beloved, looking more masculine than I remembered. It was clear he had hit the gym more- more than likely to work off stress and frustrations of our breakup- and I noticed his facial hair grew out a little bit more. His goatee was now a little thicker with a small, thin line trailing alongside his chin as a beard. I swallowed hard as our eyes finally met for the first time in three months. He took a seat across from me and ordered a small coffee when the waitress had immediately came over upon his arrival. She was being a tad bit flirtatious but didn't make any sudden moves due to her ignorance of our relationship status.

I began to pant slightly, feeling my chest tighten as I gripped my mug even harder. I tried not to make eye-contact, fighting back the sudden wave of tears that rushed over me. I grabbed the lone menu from behind the salt shaker to shield my face, faking like I was scanning the options to order. The waitress quickly came back with his coffee and even gave him a complimentary blueberry muffin with her number scribbles on the napkin beneath it. I heard him chuckle smoothly, thanking her for her kindness. I closed my eyes tight, fighting back the tears that I knew I could not control. This was becoming too much for me to handle. I was not ready.

"Are you going to pretend to look over the menu to avoid us talking, Angelica?"

I bit my bottom lip, still holding it over my face. I finally spoke. "Can it, Finster. I am scanning the fucking options here."

I guess he heard the sadness in my croaked voice because he placed his finger against to tip of the plastic to push it down towards the table. He gently grabbed it from me and tossed it to the side. My eyes were bloodshot and I was grateful I decided to re-cut my bangs again. It at least hid a little bit of my sorrow. "Angelica, you are not fooling anyone."

I gruffed, looking down at my forgotten coffee. "I was surprised you called me…"

"I wanted to tell you in person instead of having it flow to you through the grapevine."

I shot up at him, looking intently. I felt my heart stop in my chest. "What is it?"

He took a pregnant pause, sipping his coffee before he answered me. "I'm transferring school for the spring semester."

"W-what?" I mumbled, still unsure if I heard him correctly. "W-what?"

"I applied for spring admission to Yale and though they normally don't admit underclassmen with less than 35 credit hours in the spring term, I was made as an exception. I leave the week after Christmas."

Those same tears I had previously tried to fight off were now coming back in full-force. I fought my hardest to not show emotion but the news got the best of me. Contrary to belief, I was not stupid. I knew Charles had only stayed in Michigan because of me. I knew that bologna of him liking the damn libraries at Flint was some lies he fed to me to make me feel better about myself but I knew it was not the real reason he stayed.

I looked down again, this time accidentally letting a single tear slip into my coffee. I didn't dare look at him. "I'm happy for you. You need to be at some smart school, Finster. You need to be with the nerds that are meant to save the world like you."

I felt him reach out his hand to touch mine but I pulled away, still not looking up at him. "You know, I was even wondering when you would leave this town and go off on your own. Yale is one of those fancy, uppity universities you are meant to be at and I'm sure you're going to do well there."

"Angelica," his voice was soft, non-threatening yet deep and husky. It made me forget to breath. "Can you please look at me?"

I shook my head, finally clutching the mug with all my might. I didn't realize I had gripped it too hard before it cracked against me. I grew startled, only to find myself fully shedding tears after. A few of the waitresses came to the table to help me but I brushed them off and told him I would clean it up. Chuckie had stood to help me but I pushed him away as well. I threw away the many napkins I had soiled and excused myself; leaving the rest of my change to cover Chuckie's drink. I heard him call after me but I was not strong enough to deal with the news. I knew I had fucked up and I had no right to be upset at the news that he was planning on finishing his studies elsewhere; but I was naïve to think that maybe he wanted to start over.

As much as I knew Chuckie was hurting and taking out his frustrations in the wrong way, I knew he loved me just as much as I loved him; if not more. Word of our breakup got to everyone, including the parents, but details were iffy. All they knew was that maybe some time apart could do is good since we been together so long and if it was meant to be, we would come back together naturally. I tried to tell myself that over and over again but the mantra just would not stick. The stories of Charles getting sucked off by random bimbos and screwing them to his heart's desires were getting to me. I had made a great mistake in letting the man I loved out of my life and I was unsure if I could ever truly fix it.

I removed my hat from my jacket pocket to shield myself from the forceful winter winds of Michigan. I heard Chuckie yell out for me as I crossed the street; telling me he would give me a ride home but I ignored him and ran off into anywhere. I found myself in the back of a general store to catch my breath, searching for the business card I was given a month ago from my mother's friend.

Dr. Lyles -Psychologist

Specializes in Psychotherapy dealing with addictions and trauma in young adults and teens.